August 31, 2010
Winner... and Winter's Bone
It's been fun reading all the comments today from fans and non-fans of Jane Austen. Hopefully we can all say we know ourselves better after having given P&P a try. --Anna
I could not agree more. Thanks to everyone who commented yesterday, I think our little book club was a success! I sat down last night with a glass of merlot the size of my head and re-read all the comments, it was like listening in on the best conversation at the party. What struck me most was how careful everyone was to say their opinion but not be a jerk (there was no, "You're wrong and stupid! This book is a masterpiece/suckfest!") In this age of sex tapes and "Sorry, officer, that's not my cocaine, I was holding it for a friend..." I think our book club was a rarity and a gem. Jane would be proud.
The comments helped me see the book in new ways (more on that in a bit) and I wish you could all come to my house and chat about books every weekend. It would keep me reading more and we could drink while gabbing.
The randomly chosen winner of book-club-comment-day is Linda who commented:
However, rereading Pride and Prejudice in the new annotated edition was really a revelation to me. Taking time to read the annotations forced me to slow down and really look at the world Austen was describing--and it was almost like visiting another universe. Previously, I had glossed over all of the humor, especially with Mr. Collins, and was clueless about the implications of one's choice of carriage.
She will be receiving an equally random assortment of goodies from my unemployed stash, including some 100% pure Norwegian wool in a golden orange hue, a few skeins of my favorite wool Noro, a few knitting books, some knitting markers and a mixed CD I made myself. I am also including a copy of a book I bought just for this winner:
Winter's Bone
I thought we could all read it in September for another book club chitchat. It's a fast read, you'll zip through it in a day or two, and it's a contemporary novel. It was recently made into an amazing indie film which I hope gets nominated for an Oscar this year. I've already read it, which is why I'm recommending it. I am selfish, you see, I want to re-read this book and talk to people about it. And I want to share it with everyone. Are you in?
So, make a date. Winter's Bone Book Chat on Monday, September 27th!!!
And I still want to re-read Gatsby. Any takers on that one? Can we fit it in September, too, or should we wait until October?
- - -
The comments yesterday had my brain bubbling, so I wanted to jot down a few things:
1) It's Colin Firth, yo
Thank you so much to everyone who subtly pointed out the difference between enjoying the BBC mini-series version of Pride and Prejudice versus enjoying the book itself. I feel the same way about the movie Emma! I love the film but can't get past twenty pages in the book.
I have never seen the Colin Firth mini-series or any of the P&P movies but it's now in my Netflix queue. After I finished the book on Sunday I tried watching the one version of Pride and Prejudice offered streaming on Netflix and I couldn't get through it. That 1980s Mr. Darcy was too creepy for me, he looked like he'd just escaped from a mental institution and would at any moment break into song OR murder Elizabeth OR become a gay porn star. Weird.
My favorite comment about the movie/book gap was from reader Donna:
I didn't mind watching the movies while knitting as I am assuming the producers are displaying the correct period housing, clothing etc....but reading her book, Jane does not get into any detail of her environment, just the gossip! It would of been nice to hear about the decor of the rooms, the gardens, the food, what they were doing to keep themselves busy (beside gossiping).
There were several points in the book where I wanted someone to describe the food or the wallpaper or even the weather. Please, Lord, send us a stormy day and deliver us from the drawing room, amen. But after reading the comments I can see where the lack of in-depth description is almost part of the draw for some readers. If you love the conversation and observation, you want more. If you're able to sink into the conversation, then descriptive leaps into dinner or weather might be a distraction. Inneresting!
2) Happily Ever After
The discussions I thought were most intriguing in the comments were all about the ideas of marriage and the "happy ending" to the story. Is being married a happy ending? I certainly grew up thinking that it was, a notion which probably added to My Bigass Mental Breakdown of 2005.
Some comments pointed out that there are women in 2010 still quite focused on getting a husband and marrying well just like Jane Austen's characters. There was a time in my life when all I wanted was to get married. I was so sure that marriage would open the door to happiness. (There was also a time when I really wanted an Epilady. Times change.)
I thought reader Jennifer said it best:
I think the happy ending part is not that they get married, but that they both cause each other to change in ways that make them better people (and bonus that those people they change into are so well suited to one another).
I wonder if I would have had a completely different feeling for this book had I read it when I was 19, instead of now at 39? I know the way I feel about marriage has completely changed in the past few years. There was a point while reading P&P when I realized my feelings about marriage probably colored how I related to the book.
The author's life, on the other hand, is better than the best page-turner on the shelves. I read something online about her sister and other siblings burning all (or most) of Jane's letters after her death. I loved that they had such a fierce protection for her privacy even after she was gone. Fascinating stuff, no?
3) Happily Ever After addendum
For those of you who do like happy endings but also like a little thievery and piracy and some good old fashioned revenge fantasies, read or re-read The Count of Monte Cristo
4) Cracked me right up
You know, I'd take a long day in a drawing room over the courtship rituals of Jersey Shore any day.-- RB
- - -
Reading is a uniquely personal experience. I love sinking into a book, getting lost in it, I don't care if it's smutty V.C. Andrews or highbrow Henry James, if you get sucked into a book it's a decadent, pleasurable thing. I feel obligated to read classic lit because it's the foundation for all reading and writing (and reading and writing are my two favorite things to do in life!) Pride and Prejudice reminded me that it's OK not to like a book, even a beloved classic. Not everything will speak to every person. But it's good to try it out to see if it will fit. Every palate is different.
Don't forget! Monday, September 27, 2010--
Winter's Bone
Posted by laurie at 02:04 PM | Comments (105)
August 30, 2010
Nerdy Monday: Book chat!
August got away from me, so I passed the weekend reading Pride And Prejudice
I took a break midway through reading P&P and did a little research online about Jane Austen's life (hey, it's been a while since I was in school and I'm not one of those people who goes around pretending to know everything, nothing irritates me more than pedantic pedantics, I fully admit I have to wikipedia shit all day long) and once I brushed up on my Austen facts I was much more interested in finishing the book. She died when she was so young, just a few years older than I am now. And I kept thinking how she never got to see what an impact her books had on the world ... here we are almost 200 years after the book was first published we're still talking about it!
I'm not a book critic, I can only say if a book spoke to me or not. I'm also deeply aware of the hate mail and criticism which would happen if open season were declared on me for not loving your favorite book. So I will not say I hated it. I didn't hate it at all, actually. While it was not a lifetime favorite for me, I'm certainly glad I read it. My main irritation was that the characters don't do anything except sit in drawing rooms and talk -- perhaps I would have enjoyed the Zombies version better -- maybe you'll assume I'm not subtle and literary enough to get the social commentary. I do see it, I mean that's all the book is, social observation, but I guess my appetite for marriage chitchat isn't 400 pages long.
I have to say, this book did make me feel grateful I didn't grow up in turn-of-the-century England. I can't imagine spending your childhood waiting to be married and then spending your adult life waiting to marry off your kids while gossiping about marriage all day long. (During one long scene where everyone sits around in the drawing room, I wrote in my diary, "These are people who could have seriously benefited from a TV.") In the end, though, it was pleasing to close the book and feel a sense of accomplishment. I'm glad we all read this book because now I can say I've read it and cross that off my list.
What did you think? I'm especially interested in folks who also read this book for the first time like un-subtle, un-literary me. Did you like the characters? Did you like the style of writing? The tone? The setting? The ending? Did you wish for zombies, too?
Posted by laurie at 09:06 AM | Comments (300)
August 27, 2010
Weekend plans: Read Pride & Prejudice
Don't forget, on Monday we'll be chitchatting about Pride And Prejudice
Frankie is still mad we didn't decide to read Cat's Cradle
Have a great weekend! See you Monday!
Posted by laurie at 11:44 AM
August 05, 2010
Livin' in a world of "get a life!" ...Everyone seems so uptight. Nothing's wrong and nothing's right...
That title is from one of my favorite songs by En Vogue-- Giving Him Something He Can Feel. You go online for the lyrics and it says "...livin' in a world of ghetto life..." but in the first liner notes on the first tape I got it said, "livin' in a world of 'get a life'" ...and that made sense to me so you know that is how I sing it loud and proud in my Jeep.
Everyone says "Get a life, man!" and what does that mean anyway?
What is a life? Get a life! I think what people mean when they say it to you is, "Be more like me!" "Get a life I approve of!" "Be less freaky to me, because anything different makes me question myself and I don't do that navel-gazing bullshit!"
Whatever, it's a song.
So the very first piece of existential philosophy I ever applied to real life came from the movie Top Gun
See, in the movie Jester gives Maverick flight-school hell for flying below the hard deck. No one goes below the hard deck! You get penalized for flying below the hard deck like that crazy Maverick! And I realized in my family -- and at school, to a lesser degree, and in all relationships -- it seemed there was an invisible emotional hard deck inside all social groups and we are not allowed to go beneath it. We all join in on an implicit agreement never to go below the hard deck in polite conversation.
Before you get the idea I was special and gifted at age twelve please recall I spent an hour every morning applying so much blue eyeshadow I could have passed for Papa Smurf.
But it was an apt philosophy. Families and relationships and even whole companies develop an emotional hard deck which no one is permitted to fly below. People have personal hard decks, I have mine. Above the hard deck I'll share and give, below is a different story. You start making low-flying recon missions below my hard deck and I shut it down faster than a block party in a swine flu epidemic.
If I ever had the desire to return to college I could freak out the professors with my life lessons and social anthropological mores learned from 1980s films. This is just the tip of the crazyberg.
Do you have an emotional hard deck? Does your family have one? Have you ever dared venture below it, dared to fly low and dangerous?
And what do you think, are we livin' in a world of ghetto life get a life where everyone seems so uptight?
- - -
Edited to add in what surely must be irony considering the last sentence, above, that yes thank you to commenter who pointed out I must have been older than 12 if the movie came out in 1986. I looked online to be super accurate because all that matters clearly is the exact age I was when I saw Top Gun and I was 14. Also, Meg Ryan is in the movie and she plays Goose's wife. It's a small part that I personally liked.
Now I am closing comments and taking a nice long break. Goodbye!
Posted by laurie at 07:31 PM | Comments (52)
August 04, 2010
Pride and Prejudice it is, then
So let's meet back here on Monday August 30th to chat about the book. You can order it online (here's The Annotated Pride and Prejudice
Edited to add: There are apparently a number of ways to get this book free, thanks to all the folks who commented to let us know. I bought the version in Target that looks all Twilight-ish, well, I just thought it was hilarious that it says "Bella's favorite book!" or something right on the cover. But here are other options:
• http://www.online-literature.com/austen/prideprejudice/
• Free Audio Book from LibriVox
And on August 30th, everyone who comments in our little virtual bookclub will be entered to win a drawing for some goofy prize. Being on the thrifty side of finances these days, it will likely be an odd assortment of yarn and books from my stash and who knows what else. Can't send Bob after all, besides my missing him terribly he would break the bank in shipping weight charges...
Get reading!
Posted by laurie at 11:22 AM | Comments (73)
August 02, 2010
Summer reading
Last night I stayed up way too late with my nose stuck in a book, I'm reading The Lady Elizabeth
I bought two other books recently as well -- Pride And Prejudice
So what do you think about us having a goofyass virtual bookclub this month and you all pick the book you want to read most -- pick one, Gatsby or Pride and Prejudice, post today in the comments and majority rules -- and we'll meet back here maybe on Monday, August 30th (so you have that weekend to cram, hah) and we can chat about the book? And everyone who decides to participate in that chitchat in the comments will be entered to win some fun gift, like some yarn and maybe a signed copy of the Drunk
You in? You have to cast your vote today for which book, though. If ya'll think this is a stupid idea just let me know and we'll pretend I was stoned on paint fumes or something. Happy Monday!
Posted by laurie at 09:03 AM | Comments (510)
July 31, 2010
End-of-July check in
Over half the year has passed already and finally I'm making some progress. I'm glad I started the year with my two goals -- get healthy and get happy -- and decided to keep myself accountable with these monthly check-ins. I was not cheering the concept of public accountability back in April and May but things have evened out. So, here it is:
1) Goal: Get Healthy
With more time at home I no longer have to worry about cooking ahead for a whole workweek. It's AWESOME. Just eat what you want when you want. It took me a while to get into a rhythm with it, but now I am so there. If it's 8 a.m. and I just had a long walk and want chicken and rice for breakfast that's what I cook.
Last month I also discovered something crazy in my eating habits. For the final year or so that I worked at the bank I was eating two dinners. I didn't know I was eating two dinners, mind you, but I was. I didn't discover it until June when my job ended and after just a few days I realized what I'd been doing all that time and I was horrified.
Looking back, I think it started to go wrong in the Spring of 2009 when I moved offices. In my new location everyone came in late and stayed late. I had been accustomed to coming in early and leaving early like the folks on the other side of the building (and that had been my schedule for YEARS!). So I started this weird schedule of coming in kinda early and staying kinda late. Add that to the everlasting gobstopper of the commute and my personal time dwindled dramatically. On the weekends I'd prepare ahead (as much as I could) for five lunches and five breakfasts and maybe some snacks. Dinner was just too much to prep ahead of time, too. That's a lot of work, you know, shopping for and cooking and prepping and packing a week's worth of homecooked meals in a day or two. My weekends became a long list of work just to get through the week ahead. Exhausting and dull.
As the months wore on I had to work later and later each night so I was getting home later and later. After an hour and a half in traffic, sometimes I'd walk in the door at 8:30 or 9 p.m. and of course by that time I was just off the charts hungry, I could have eaten the paint off the walls. So I'd start preparing dinner (I was committed to eating healthy, you see) and while it was cooking I'd eat a snack. Because I hadn't eaten since 11 a.m. and I was HUNGRY. Maybe some popcorn or fruit or leftover veggies, maybe cheese and crackers. A glass of wine. Just to take the edge off, you understand.
By the time dinner was ready I had already eaten. Here's the kicker though: since I had gone to all the trouble of cooking something for dinner, I ate that meal, too. Even if I wasn't truly hungry anymore. Because dammit, after this longass day I'd made dinner and it was not going to waste!
Thus double dinners. I wasn't even aware of it.
Needless to say that has stopped.
My physical fitness goal for July was the same as it has been all year -- walk every day for the whole month. In July I got close to my goal. I walked 21 days out of 31. And these weren't your quickie 15-minute strolls, on 19 days I walked over 3 miles each time.
Just a word here about my walk-every-day-in-a-month goal. Over the past few months as I have continued to make and re-make this goal (and continued to not meet it) I have gotten hundreds of comments and emails and suggestions from folks online. "Just shoot for three days out of every five." "Five days out of seven..." "Every other day." "Aim for 10,00 steps a day, and buy a pedometer!" "8,000 steps..." "5,000 steps!" "Take the stairs!" "Just park far away and walk and count that..." "Go for mileage not days!" "Speed not mileage..." "Instead of walking try yoga!" "...swimming." "... biking."
Now this stuff is always interesting and funny to me. I love trying to see what clicks with people or makes them tick. But sometimes I can be kind of slow on the uptake! So I didn't at first understand why so many strangers had an interest in modifying my personal goal. It took all this time for it to finally sink in. People look at goals differently and for some folks, watching me miss my goal month after month must be like Chinese water torture, slow and painful. They simply wanted to give me tips to help me move along already.
The whole purpose of goal-setting for many folks is to achieve it as quickly as possible, check it off and declare victory so they can move on to the next goal. That does make sense now that I think on it. Continual plodding failure must feel like, well, failure. And failure becomes a problem to solve. So it came out as, "Here, just do this and then you won't fail!"
It's very sensible. But my brain works differently. Sure, I have to-do lists of little items that need checking off quickly: go to the post office, buy milk and cat litter, drop off this bag of stuff at the goodwill, mop. But my personal goals are very different from to-do list items. They are my landmarks along a path, my hopes, my optimism for what I want to be like in the future. For me, the real success in a goal comes from working toward it each day. For example, one of my goals is to declutter my home. The success isn't achieved on the one day I wake up and look around and think, "There! I've done it! Check! Now what do I do next?" The achievement in my mind is spending ten minutes every day or so to declutter a drawer or sort through old paperwork. Wash, rinse, repeat.
Anyway, my goal of walking each day in a calendar month isn't a particularly difficult goal. It's not very physically demanding ("walk" is loosely defined, no set time or mileage) and it's certainly not financially unachievable. It's a good, do-able goal. The actual victory of knocking this goal off a list will pale in comparison to the days spent working toward it. Let's be honest, nothing dramatic is going to change in my life just because I walk 30 or 31 days in a row. The real success is derived from working toward it and getting incrementally better.
There is no way I would change the goal and dial it downward to meet me halfway. The whole point of my personal goal setting is to rise up and meet the challenge. Tomato, tomahto.
Don't get me wrong -- this isn't to say my way of looking at goals is better or worse than any other way. It's just different. Thank God we're all different, yes? My way would drive some people insane, but to my little brain it's simply another whole month stretching ahead of days that I can possibly achieve a goal. The goal is arbitrary. The exercise is the point. The only reason I am yammering on and on about this is that I think it's fascinating we're all so different! I personally love it. And if it weren't for my future husband Al inventing this innernets I would never have had you all share this with me. Thank goodness for Al.
So of course in August my ideal is to go on a walk each day in the month. One day I'll get there. See, it's like a mystery. Gives you something to look forward to!
2) Goal: Get Happy
Another vaguely defined goal, but you get the idea. And things are good. I've been able to spend time with my family and the cutest dog ever, it's great having them on the west coast and especially now when I can actually visit with them. The rest of the time is my own. I'm well-suited to being alone most of the days and I keep myself busy and industrious. My stress level now is so different I can't even explain it without adding in some effusively bad 1980s breakdancing.
Looking back, I spent all of 2009 and most of 2010 in a state of tightly wound neurosis, like a wind-up toy about to bust a spring. It's a relief to breathe, have time, sleep, go for long walks. Walking is like therapy, I spend my long walks daydreaming or planning or working out stories and it's such a luxury.
No matter what happens in the future, I want to keep this calm feeling of not always being in a rush. I have my moments of panic about money and finances but it passes. Everything will work out. Somehow. I truly believe this down in my cells.
- - -
So that was July. In August my goals are to walk (for the whole month!), write more (which will make me happier and keep me feeling productive), and cook a few new recipes. I want to try some new stir-fry meals and maybe make something with Indian spices. I am actually even starting August by inviting a friend over for dinner next Friday (I don't entertain much, so this is a nice little change for me.)
Mostly I'm learning that all this is a choice. Is happiness dependent on outside factors? Do I have to wait for X opportunity and X job and X man and X car and X money and X day to be happy? What if that exact combination of factors never comes? OR worse, what if it comes and I'm too tired to enjoy it? So right now each day I just wake up and decide to choose good thoughts over panicky, anxious ones. It sounds simplistic and selfhelpy and lined with Velveeta but it really does work. Picture a future of abject poverty and no food and scabies and loneliness -- hey, that feels bad. Horrible. Maybe I will cry in a corner and eat my hair.
But picture instead this beautiful summer day and freshly vacuumed stairs and a watermelon I got for 15 cents a pound at Ralph's and it's so delicious. That feels happy. Have I cured cancer? No. But do I feel pretty good about life? Yeah, not too shabby.
It seems to be working so far.
Posted by laurie at 06:36 PM | Comments (60)
July 30, 2010
Breaking News: Cat Ladies Set to Take Over World, team coverage at eleven
1) Al Gore why haven't you called me?
I am waiting. I even started spending more time upstairs in my apartment because I get better phone reception there. Bob needs a new daddy. Get a move on. I'm not going to wait forever you know! (Totally lying. Will absolutely wait forever.)
2) Speaking of Blob Bob
I've had to cut off the Meow Mix because he's getting so... fluffy. Now he has this healthy holistic blahblahblah food and he hates it. Yesterday he chewed through half of my latest issue of Entertainment Weekly in what I believe was a well-planned retribution attack.
3) Oh-kay, here's the situation, my parents went away on a week's vacation...
(Song lyrics from when Will Smith was a rapper. Oh ye of youngness who do not remember the good old days.) So my folks may be staying in Orange County for a while, maybe even a month or two! Very exciting, because the OC is LA-adjacent and I can see them more regularly. My Dad is slowly improving and that's a relief, though he's not all the way better. I think it is very surprising how things work out. If I were still at the bank I would never get to spend time with them even though they're in my time zone and just a car ride away. But now I get to see them really frequently and we can have dinner together and just visit. Time isn't merely a luxury, it's the only luxury, isn't it? Time to breathe, time to just hang out with someone, time to do grand experiments with deodorant.
4) I ponder not just the navel but the underarms as well
You can't really experiment with deodorants when you're working full time. If you get a product dud you could find yourself five minutes before the afternoon staff meeting trying to de-stink with wet wipes or mask with perfume. Don't act like you don't know. So I have taken this opportunity -- this grand life change -- to do awesome things with my time like experiment with deodorants. Yeah, I know, because my life is about science, people. Practically a modern day Marie Curie. I plan to report on the Stink Mitigating Study of 2010 very soon in an essay so detailed it is sure to win me a Pulitzer.
5) The Summer of my Knitcontent
Summer knitting continues in full force, I'm now on the first of many hats. This one was originally planned for my Dad but even though I measured carefully and swatched it still may be too large -- I hadn't counted on the high cotton content of the yarn being so darn stretchy. I'm used to using wool which holds its shape so well. But all is not lost! My little brother Eric who has a ginormous Sputnik-style cranium loved the looks of this hat and so if it's too big I'll give it to Eric and use the other skein of yarn for another hat for Dad.
I'm using Noro Taiyo in color #5 (gorgeous, amazing) and unlike most Noro this yarn is very soft, probably thanks to the 40% cotton content and 30% silk. It's also 15% wool and 15% nylon. I almost always buy my Noro on sale but even at a discount this was a pricier skein (I don't remember what I paid, but I only ordered two skeins because of the price). But I was surprised what you get for the money -- a good size skein, 100 grams/200 meters and it's unbelievably gorgeous yarn! Each skein is more than plenty for a big, cushy hat. I think this yarn would also make an excellent bag (it feels durable) or mittens.
I'm making a 2x2 ribbed hat of my own creation. There's a nifty little trick for getting the brim to fold just right -- you knit 2, purl 2 for the length of the hat brim (I like it just around 2 inches) then when you're at a place you want the hat to fold you mix up the pattern -- on the next round you start with purl 2, knit 2 and keep working in that pattern the rest of the hat. The offset row where the two different ribbed pattern meets makes a natural fold.
When I'm done I'll write up the whole pattern and post it. My big challenge will come with decreases since I like to decrease totally in pattern and retain the ribbing. It will be fun working it out.
Also, I'm not sure why my iphone camera got all fuzzy and romantic this morning for a dang hat but here it is:
Here is all the help I had behind the scenes styling this photo shoot:
- - -
Oh! And yesterday I saw the movie "SALT" with Angelina Jolie. It wasn't bad for a summer afternoon popcorn flick. I'm still not a huge Angelina fan but I love me some Liev Schrieber. And it was good to see a female action star movie. After listening to the female leads in both Killers
Posted by laurie at 08:44 AM | Comments (85)
July 29, 2010
Bow-wow-yippie-yo-yippie-yeah
My folks have been staying out near San Diego and I got to see them this week when they came in to Orange County. I spent a lot of time following the dog around with my iphone, taking his picture:
Sleepy dog on Grandma's bed. (That's a picture of my Grandma & Grandpa on the bedside table.)
Here he is finally getting some attention from my mom because he is so neglected. Yeah. So not the center of all attention of the universe...
And here he is watching all the neighborhood dogs walk by:
Yesterday as I was driving home along the twisted, congested freeways of Los Angeles I was reminded that it's summer tourist season. Lots of cars from out of town, lots of folks with GPS units and maps and still puzzled looks and mad gesturing at missed exits.
As I drove through downtown there were some crowds on the overpasses holding big banners and waving signs about the immigration stuff going on in Arizona. And of course this is Los Angeles so there's lots of honking and fists raised out of car windows in support, all of us carrying a little Cesar Chavez down in our souls. But it's not just this day or this issue, we always have people running around civic buildings and big intersections and movie studios holding placards and carrying banners protesting something or another. And I wondered what the visitors to our fine city think when they see the residents running around protesting stuff, all the cars honking just because it's traffic, and why not honk.
Or what do I know, maybe nonstop daily picketing is a way of life everywhere? Maybe in Des Moines and Kansas City and Boise and Charleston it's a regular old Wednesday to see people hanging bedsheets off the overpass with spray-painted slogans, just like in Los Angeles. What do you think?
Of course when I finally traversed the traffic and got back home my kittens were happy to see me and they got plenty of lap time and also a little paparazzi time. Here's Soba, exuding tortiness:
Later she plans to take over a small country. Something with ample Greenies distribution and no picketing allowed.
Posted by laurie at 09:35 AM | Comments (71)
July 23, 2010
Fryday Five
1) Shocking Developments
It has taken six full weeks but something has finally clicked. It happened this week. Suddenly my walks went from being an obligation (something I knew I should do) to what I most look forward to all day. That is insane in the membrane. I'm not sure what happened. I think it's taken this long just to get past the physical acclimation (going from desk jockey and top-notch couch holder-downer to daily exerciser was not an easy transition.)
For those of you who love and enjoy exercise you can skip the rest of this. I myself haven't really enjoyed exercise in years. For one thing, when you have a tight schedule it feels like one more item you have to fit in your limited free time and add to the growing to-do list. And that's irritating. The other issue was that I had gotten so out of shape even a short walk was a huff-n-puff affair and all it did was reconfirm the bad feelings I had about my weight and health.
But for the past five-almost-six weeks I've really stuck to it, plodding through the first weeks with short one-mile walks that took almost forty minutes. Even now I'm not going to win any races, I still clock about an 18-minute mile, but I'm edging past three and a half miles each morning and I've gone from feeling like a wounded blob afterward to feeling more energetic than before I started. Can you believe that?
So, if you too are completely out of shape and hate the very idea of slogging up the block and back I think it will get easier. It took me six long weeks. But something turned over inside me. Crazypants.
2) Which is how I found myself in the sand yesterday
After I walked yesterday morning I showered and got dressed and had breakfast and did some writing and this and that I sat at my desk and looked outside where the sun was just starting to break through. It was just so pretty. And when I thought about the day ahead the one thing I wanted to do more than anything else in the entire world was to walk along the beach. So I did! I threw a few things into a beach bag, slipped on my flip-flops and I was off to Malibu Lagoon.
It was a spectacular day, with plenty of lovely wildlife in the bird sanctuary:
And plenty of other goodlooking wildlife, too:
I walked the whole length of the shore to the pier and back and then sat in the sand and read a book for a while. Sometimes I just sat and did nothing at all. I loved watching the surfers paddling and bobbing in the ocean. I loved listening to the waves crashing and foaming on shore.
One of the perks of walking so long in the sand is that your feet get all smoothed and buffed, it's nature's best pedicure.
My flintstone feet love the sand:
Yes, yoga pants at the beach. It was 68 degrees!
3) This book I'm reading is pretty good
I took Women Food and God
I've read just about every book Geneen Roth has written (I even went to one of her workshops back about 15 years ago) and I like this book, though I don't think it's going to resonate with everyone. Well, not that anything ever does.
The one thing inside this book that jumped out at me the most was a quote that's not even from Geneen Roth, it's from the writer Annie Dillard:
"How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives."
Ain't that the truth.
4) Maybe I should re-evaluate all that teevee time?
I got some very excellent emails yesterday, this one made me feel relieved to see that it's not me, it's Design Star's fault:
I'm mostly a lurker on your site, but I just wanted to tell you that you are SO right about HGTV Design Star. My husband and I have watched every season of that show, and we really thing it has gone down hill this season. They got a new producer, the guy from Survivor, and we think that's the cause. The whole dynamic of the show seems really different now - it seems like Survivor with some paint thrown in! I wish it was more like last season. Anyway, it was nice to see that we aren't alone in being disappointed in this season. --Melissa
AHA! So they changed producers, and now that you mention the Survivor thing it does seem like Survivor with paint chips. How annoying. It used to be such a good show and I still love David Bromstad. But maybe I should take back that one hour of my life and let go of Design Star. Maybe.
Also thank you to everyone who assured me I am not alone in my Real Housewives of New Jersey trance. Why is it so compelling? Why?
5) And for your weekend, I leave you with these...
Just want to share some of the beautiful beach with you! I only live about 30 miles from the coastline (up the 101 and across Topanga Canyon) but I'm embarrassed to admit I rarely go to the beach, maybe just two or three times a year if that. If you park on PCH it's free, and that fresh air and sunshine and sand are so good for you, it's a great way to spend an afternoon.
I think the very best thing that has happened to me in the past six weeks -- well aside from not feeling like I'm about to die when I walk a block and a half -- is that I have actually relaxed. Intellectualy I realize that you make a choice each day how to react, to live, to be and all that. But in reality when you're spread thin and full to the very limit with anxiety and worry and exhaustion it's hard to choose good feelings. This little break has given me my life back. There's a purely Puritanical streak inside me that feels guilty for enjoying a day off work but I'm successfully ignoring it. Why feel guilty about enjoying a day? After all, like the lady says, how you spend your days is how you spend your life.
I'm sure I could wake up each morning in a panic over money and the future and all that (oh trust me, I know how to do that REALLY WELL) but instead I'm actively choosing to look at all the good stuff. There's even some great stuff. It was there all along but I was so tired and worn out I couldn't see it. The anxiety has diminished and I just wake up loving the luxury of time, knowing nothing lasts forever, I might as well enjoy it while I can. I don't think I am explaining it very well. All I can say for sure is that I don't feel like a tightly coiled spring that's about to explode anymore. When I talk to my friends they say, "Even your voice is different." Nothing is perfect -- I feel obligated to add that -- but still. It is actually possible to be in an imperfect, unsure, not-perfectly-stable place and still feel OK. Who would have thunk it.
I hope you enjoy the this little trip to the beach as much as I did!
Posted by laurie at 09:25 AM | Comments (126)
July 22, 2010
Some stuff and some TeeVee
The weather is so nice, it finally cooled down and the scorching hot temperatures backed off a little. When I go for a walk in the morning it's actually cool outside! I love it.
I know summer's going to return but it makes these little breaks even better. The best days are when we have the marine layer and it's cloudy in the morning. My Jeep doesn't have A/C so on really hot days I don't get out much, it's just excruciating in the heat of the day. When it's cool like this I can run errands, sit in traffic and not baste in my own sweat.
- - -
On this website I write about the things I enjoy chatting about. If I don't want to talk about something in detail, I simply don't go into the details. This is the same advice I give people who ask me about personal blogging: it's a good idea to have clear boundaries and share carefully in a public forum. I'm happy to be candid about many things but not everything. Without boundaries you feel stripped and deconstructed. And trust me when I say no one wants to see me strip.
I realize some people reading today feel cheated out of the good dirt about how it is I came to be unemployed. I got your emails. And I understand your natural curiosity and certainly I would be curious, too. But this is not a website about my day job and never has been. I don't think that's ethical, for one thing, and it's certainly never been the focus of my stories. My job ended. That's all I have to say about it. Think of it as an uninteresting plot device in a bigger, more furry and yarn-covered story.
For several weeks in June I chewed over the best way to even mention it here in my online diary. I didn't want to pretend it hadn't happened since obviously it's a big change in my personal life but I also have no desire to chat with the world at large about all the intimate details. I certainly have zero intention to malign my former employer. And anyway it's in the past. Things are fine.
I hoped that treating this change in my life as a fact, a part of the timeline and brief logistical narrative of June, would be sufficient for this website. I apologize to the people who just think this isn't good enough. I don't know what to tell you. I guess you'll have to find a TV show with a much better plot than this old poopy blog. I highly recommend the new season of The Closer. That Brenda Leigh is the best woman on TV! And a Southerner at that.
Ok, so let's move on.
- - -
Speaking of TV, my best friend, I cannot believe I tune in every week and watch The Real Housewives of New Jersey. Even when I am watching it I wonder why I am transfixed, if I am losing IQ points, why they pronounce things the way they do. I vacillate between wanting to adopt Danielle's children the whole episode or wanting to get my TV set vaccinated for gonorrhea. Or both. But I love watching Bethenny Getting Married. Even at nineteen months pregnant and with big cankles she was still hotter in a bathing suit than I will ever be and yet I do not hold this against her.
The Closer has been really good so far this season, though I sure didn't see the twist coming Monday night with Captain Rayder's investigation. The show that follows The Closer is a new cop program Rizzoli & Isles and I wanted it to be good -- I love Angie Harmon, I think she's a really appealing actress -- but the whole setup seems a little fake and weird to me, and not in the good-fake Castle way. I'm still going to give it a chance though, because that's how I am with TV, slutty and fairly undemanding.
I watch two reality/contest shows -- HGTV's Design Star and Next Food Network Star. I was thisclose to bailing out of Design Star because they kept sending home contestants other than Nina. I'm sure she's talented and all that, but I would rather eat a bowl of cold cow brains for an hour than watch 30 seconds of Nina hosting her own show. Finally finally they sent her home this week and the whole show gave a collective sigh of relief. Doesn't it seem like they're too focused this season on the team dynamics instead of the design? Not sure I'll keep watching this show after all.
The Food Network competition is more interesting, though. I think my favorites are Aartie, Brad and Tom. I like Herb a lot, too, he's got such a great personality. I can't imagine how hard it must be to live and compete with a housefull of strangers and do it all in front of the cameras.
The best thing about trashy summer TV is that it feels productive when I'm knitting. With the air conditioning on, of course, and a big mug of hot tea.
- - -
Best thing about working at my own keyboard is all the help I get:
She's sitting on my lap as I type. Makes for some furry shui.
- - -
no comments today
Posted by laurie at 10:32 AM
July 12, 2010
Well, it's a marvelous night for a moondance.
The title is from the song I've had stuck in my head since last Thursday. I love you, Van Morrison, but please make it stop. I was even singing it in my head last night as I slept, or tried to sleep.
I've been re-reading one of my favorite books, Into Thin Air
Last night I read a few chapters before I went to bed. Even though I have read this book twice and already know how it ends, duh, it's still a page-turner. Finally, I put the book down and went to bed and then had a very detailed dream about me, my mom and my dad climbing Mt. Everest. Apparently I am sporty in my subconscious. We made it all the way to camp four and then all the sudden I had to turn around and go back. And in the dream my parents were like, "Ok! See you later!" and I was really mad that they kept going. It was dramatic. Apparently my head is combining all the time I've spent reading about Mt. Everest with all the time I've spent with my family recently and is spitting it out reality-show style in a dream. Freaky. And it was all played over a Van Morrison soundtrack.
- - -
My parents drove their house-on-wheels from Idyllwild to Orange County to be closer to Grandma. I went down last week to visit and on Saturday we were at the nursing home chatting with Grandma, she seemed really good. We got on the topic of traveling -- she and Grandpa traveled all over the world before he passed away -- and I asked her what her favorite travel destination was in all that time.
"Well, I found something to enjoy about every place we visited," she said. And she went on to tell me about some of her favorite places, like seeing the Crazy Horse monument in South Dakota.
"You know, Grandma, I've never been there. Or to Mount Rushmore. Or most of the middle," I said. "Sometimes I feel embarrassed that I've seen so many far-off places and I've only seen part of the United States."
"Oh, I think you're doing it just right," said Grandma. "Travel now and see the world while you're young and can stand those long plane rides. Later when you're older you can stay here and see the whole country."
All this time I felt a little guilty for always wanting to go off somewhere else and see the world and in just a five-minute conversation she changed my whole outlook. That's one of the things I've always liked about Grandma. She never really makes excuses or has regrets.
- - -
Finally:
Like watching paint dry. The progress of glove #2, now at the thumb gusset.
- - -
Finally, finally:
Sobakowa enjoying a little early morning contemplation time.
Posted by laurie at 10:01 AM | Comments (79)
July 06, 2010
The Cabin in the Woods
Although I didn't spend my time up in the cabin writing a manifesto and wearing a hoodie and growing a beard while plotting thermonuclear destruction, I did enjoy the little break away from the city. I love Los Angeles and its assorted chaos, but you know you've been in it too long when you need a tape recording of car alarms and doors slamming and airplanes and honking cars to get a good sleep at night.
My parents let me borrow their white noise machine. It did in a pinch.
When I heard "cabin," I was expecting something rustic and possibly dorm-like with no bathrooms. I wasn't specifically looking forward to the camping aspect, I've never been a fan of rustic, but all in the spirit of adventure, etc. etc. What a surprise to discover that the cabin was practically brand new with a full kitchen, sparkling clean appliances, a perfect (private) bath with a full shower and tub and a bedroom all to myself!
(The cabin from outside.)
There was a little living room with a small sofa that pulls out into a bed and a comfy chair in one corner. A drop-leaf table and two kitchen chairs sat by the sunny window and led right into the kitchen. There was a small hallway with a pantry, and a storage nook and the bathroom off to one side. At the end of the small hallway is the bedroom with a large closet and a bedside table with a lamp.
There were narrow stairs right outside the bedroom leading up to a small loft. You'd have to kneel down to move around up there, though it would be perfect for kids (or for storage). Actually, this tiny cabin was both cleaner and more efficient than the old house I was renting and it somehow managed to have more storage than this big ol' apartment I'm in now. Explain to me how a newish gigantic apartment can have nary a single pantry, linen closet or towel cupboard? How? Seriously. I have to keep my towels in a bin in my bedroom closet.
(Table, hallway leading to bedroom, loft above.)
Being inside the cabin was like sleeping in the den of efficiency. It was peaceful and clean and tiny, but outfitted with everything you need. It had a TV with satellite and a DVD player in the living room, it had a full-size fridge and freezer, the kitchen sink faced a window which looked out over a field of pines so you could watch the squirrels climbing trees as you did the dishes.
(Making a cup of tea at night.)
From the first day I was in the cabin I was astonished at how little and perfect it was -- all a person needs in one compact, well-ordered package. Isn't that what I am always hoping for in life? A well-ordered home? And I kept telling my mom over and over again, "This is the amount of stuff a person should have, it's just enough to be happy and not heavy." I spent a lot of time while I was up there in the mountain air thinking about stuff and my accumulation of it. Inside the cabin there was a place for everything, and just enough of the right things (and plenty of spaces that hadn't been filled up, too, which felt expansive.)
For example, in the towel cupboard in the bathroom, you could find four clean white facecloths, four clean white handcloths and four clean white fluffy towels. That was it. No hodgepodge assortment of towels collected over fifteen years, no mismatched bargain buys and impulse on-sale linens squashed into the shelves. Nothing spilled out when you opened the door. Everything you needed was right there, neatly lined up, just what you need and nothing extraneous.
Same with the linen closet (the cabin had a linen closet and my three-story condo has nary a hutch. Go figure.) Inside the small linen closet was an extra blanket, an extra set of sheets and pillowcases and two extra pillows. I have ferreted away two comforters, six duvet covers and the assorted sheets of the apocalypse in every coat closet in my house.
The kitchen in the little cabin held just enough thick, creamy stoneware plates and bowls to feed four people. Same with mugs and drinking glasses. We'd stopped at a grocery store before climbing up the mountain (I was serious when I said I wouldn't be going up and down the winding mountain roads until the day I left) and I bought food and a few basic kitchen supplies: olive oil, salt and pepper, garlic powder, lemons, garlic cloves, foil, clorox wipes, paper towels, soap. I thought I would miss my huge spice selection and cooking gadgets from home but you'd be surprised how little you need, really. Or maybe it was just me that was surprised. The simplicity of the cabin made it manageable, easy, enjoyable.
It was an immediate and absolute contrast to my real life. I have seven beaten-up cookie sheets in various stages of rusting and disappointment. The cabin had a single, perfect, clean cookie sheet. You know what I mean?
Don't misunderstand, I am really glad I moved into this apartment because I needed a change and I wanted to live in one of these pretty Mediterranean-meets-LA-style condo places at least once in my life. But it feels like a job in itself, keeping the place clean and tidy. It's a lot of space to manage and instead of feeling more organized and spacious it's the exact opposite! And it was the same at the little house I rented in Encino-adjacent. I just have a whole lot of stuff. And I take myself with me, it seems, wherever I move.
My relationship with my stuff is tricky. It feels comforting and cozy sometimes, and I love my stuff. And then sometimes it makes me nervous, the idea of cleaning and caring for this stuff, packing it, moving it, unpacking it, re-arranging it, the very idea is exhausting.
Spending all those days in the cabin is just what I needed, I needed to feel the spaciousness of a completely clutter-free home, even if it was just temporary. I think I brought some of that feeling home with me. It's not easy for me to pare down. I have a hard time letting go of things. It's an emotional connection: people leave, places change, everything moves so fast but your stuff stays right where you last left it. So I understand the lure. But it's a false sort of security and for as often as stuff feels comforting it also feels smothering and heavy and impossible to ever be free of it. There was something expansive, liberating about living (even for a few days) in a perfectly appointed space with just what one person really needs.
No grand conclusion at the end of this. Just planning to spend a little time each day this week cleaning out my closets, getting rid of a few things here and there. I just bought a new skillet and the temptation to keep the old one ("as a backup," I told myself) was loud but I cleaned the old skillet carefully and placed it in a bag for Goodwill. I do not need a backup skillet. Good grief.
And anyway, there was one thing crucially missing at the cabin. Three things really. The cats!
Two out of three cats agree.
Posted by laurie at 11:58 AM | Comments (90)
July 05, 2010
Idyllwild
My parents have been staying in the family truckster at a campground near Idyllwild, California and I spent the last part of June with them. I stayed in a cabin, equipped with satellite TV and indoor plumbing just as the pilgrims intended.
Idyllwild itself is a picture-perfect mountain town set high up in the San Jacinto Mountains in Riverside County. The town sits about a mile up the mountain and the campground climbs up further, about another 1,000 feet. I think that's the highest I've ever traveled upward without being in an airplane! I was on a very high mountain once in Iceland but I think it was still only about 5,000 feet (of course it was in meters so I don't remember the height exactly, and I had my eyes closed for most of the drive.) (Good thing I was the passenger.)
I'm woozy-panicky afraid of heights and mountain roads so once my mom drove me up to the campground I had no intention of going back down the mountain until it was time for me to come home. There was plenty to do, of course, like finish my first hand-knit glove and admire the spectacular scenery and visit with my parents and play with the dog for hours on end:
Dog helping me knit.
Dad taking pictures in Idyllwild.
Entrance to the pretty campground.
The guard dog in action, keeping the RV free from invading squirrels!
The guard dog's fluffy butt.
Everywhere! Huge pines.
RV life.
View from the truckster's campsite. Pure blue sky! I almost choked. Very used to my brown and crunchy air.
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Tomorrow I have more pictures from my little vacation, including the cute cabin I stayed in. But today I'll end with a mystery, since I know you all are smart and someone in the internet will have the answer.
WHAT on earth kind of tree is this? They're all over up there on the mountain, with very smooth red bark (almost like a eucalyptus right after it sheds its bark) but the trunk is very red. They have smallish grey-green leaves and tiny pink flowers that attract bees. Any ideas?
Comments are briefly open, you crazy nature lovers!
Posted by laurie at 10:22 AM | Comments (118)
July 04, 2010
Monthly check in (Independence Day edition)
At the beginning of 2010 I set two resolutions for myself and then resolved a third thing, which was to post a little check-in with myself each month, mostly just for me. To keep me accountable.
In the beginning it was fine and well and I was happy with my progress and then somewhere in mid-April I was wondering what the hell I had been drinking to come up with THAT idea, that whole accountability thing is for suckers who don't know you can change your name and move far far away! Or go off the grid and talk into your bra and direct traffic in your nightgown!
But then June happened. And staying hopeful and focused and semi-sane became not just a resolution but a dire necessity because listen, it could go real bad real fast around here. I know myself. I know I'm not the world's greatest at handling a lot of instability and change all in one day. So I got up each and every day and reached for better, decided to focus on something good or happy or entertaining.
A lot of people call this "putting your head in the sand" or "playing ostrich" but if it keeps me out of a padded room then it's a good strategy for me.
I went for a lot of walks. It's so simple, it's such a little thing we all take for granted, just walking, but it's pretty effing great. It doesn't cost anything, it's relaxing, you feel victorious. I dialed down the whine and wine, since both tend to bring me down. I cooked A LOT. It felt comforting and happy to measure and season and taste and roast. I cleaned my house so that it felt good to walk into each room.
The panic of instability isn't gone -- it's there -- I'm just not letting it take hold. Because honestly, things are all going to work out one way or another. Just because I don't know exactly what the future holds doesn't mean it holds something bad! It could hold something great. Like Al Gore taking me to In-n-Out burger on our first date.
Every time I started to have crazymaking panic and anxiety I did one of the following:
• Went for a walk.
• Cleaned house.
• Listened to selfhelpy upbeat stuff on my ipod.
• Listened to great music.
• Moisturized.
• Flossed. My teeth were in shock. They did not know what this "floss" invention was.
• Read a good book.
• Watched a great movie.
And I worked. Instead of freaking out about the instability I'm just focusing on the sheer pleasure of long, uninterrupted blocks of typing. I've been working at a job or in school (or both) since I was 14 and this is a whole new kind of day, making my own structure. And I slept. I didn't think I would, because every night since mid-April when I got that new boss and everything went weird I would wake up in a panic at 1 a.m. or 2 a.m. or 3:15 and it was impossible to get back to sleep. I figured the insomnia would continue but by mid-June I was actually sleeping. Maybe it was the walking or just the fact that I move more all day. Or maybe I was simply exhausted, but I slept. It's a whole new day when you've had some sleep.
In June my job at the bank ended (eight and a half years is such a long time in one job!) In June my grandmother had another stroke and went back to the nursing home. In June I finally got to see my dad, who has been sick since early May and I just got back from a nice long visit with them where they were staying up in the mountains in Idyllwild. And of course I got to visit with their dog, who is decidedly their favorite child.
June was OK. It all came down to choosing which me I was going to be that day. The depressing, bitter, self-pity me or the hopeful, industrious me who somehow always works it out. My natural instinct was to go all dramatic and crazy but I woke up each day in June and actively decided not to suck.
So in July I just want to do that some more of that.
Posted by laurie at 11:20 AM
June 22, 2010
The father, the car and the neverending road
My parents and the dog and the Family Truckster have finally crossed into California, they're staying in a mountain resort just north of Palm Springs. I needed to get myself up that mountain.
My mom had to park The Rig (that's what they call the big motorhome) and drive down to Orange County to see Grandma, who'd taken to bed. Dad and the dog stayed behind, up on a mountain. I told my mom she was vying for Sainthood.
"More like The Betty," she told me.
Dad's been on the iffy side of well for more than a month now so it was exciting for me just to be able to see his face. And they're in my time zone! I rented a car because I didn't want to burn out my clutch driving in the mountains. My mom warned me it was a slippery road, full of hairpin turns and sharp drop-offs. But I didn't listen because had I listened I would never have attempted the ride.
Here's something you may not know about me. I am full-on crazy afraid of heights. I don't think about it very often, since I am rarely driving myself 7,000 feet up the side of a mountain. I stay firmly planted on the Valley, and when necessary I take pharmaceutical help to sit on a cushy airplane and have a well-trained pilot escort me to some destination that comes with wine in mid-flight service. So when I found myself on the very living edge of a DAMN MOUNTAIN CLIFF, with nothing but clear blue sky on the side of the road, I had to refrain from ralphing into my own handbag (it was a rental car, after all.) I stopped at one of the turnouts only long enough to tell myself that I was a wussy and a wimp and my mom had driven a whole motorhome up this sheer suicide cliff and here I was peeing myself in a rented Nissan Versa while the soundtrack of Hair blasted on the CD player.
I made myself sing Manchester, England seven times while I drove up that mountain so slow I honestly could have walked it faster and I am a fat chick with the aerobic fitness of a ham.
This angle makes it look like an easy drive. But it was impossible to photograph the scary parts because I had my eyes closed. Hah.
It was worth it though, to see my dad and the dog.
I love my dad. Not knowing, not being able to see his face, that's been the worst part. When you see someone you see them smile, grimace, frown, cough, laugh and you can judge for yourself how they are that day. I can know how he is when I see him. My dad has been the very center of my universe, the only steady and constant person in my whole chaotic life. I moved in with him just before I turned 12 and it was like reaching shore after churning in the sea for eleven years. Every day he's been the singular thing I could count on. I brought him ginger snaps and Lotto tickets and chocolate milk. It seemed like a poor thankyou for a lifetime of anchoring.
I brought the dog a bone:
That dog gets cuter every time I see him!
And he smiles:
I stayed through Father's Day and my mom came back to the mountain just in time to drive me down it herself. She sighed because I had to take half a Xanax and go to my safe and happy place while she drove because I have no balls and I am a pathetic excuse of a family member. I sweated so bad coming down that mountain my flip-flops started to slide off! How is it that I can sit on the cramped and angry freeways of Los Angeles all day and zen out with no problem, or how is it you can drop me in the middle of Turkmenistan and in an hour I'll have you in a hotel and drinking a cocktail ... but try to get me on a boat or a high cliff and I panic. Panic. The kind that's almost paralyzing. I fool myself into thinking I am brave but a little drive up a mountain to see the one person I love best in the whole world and I start sweating so bad I may have lost a bra size. My hands were sweating! My ears even sweated.
When I got closer to home and my city greeted me with crawling traffic I sighed with relief. I said, "I love you, traffic! I love you and your slow-n-go predictableness! Let us now relax and sing all the words to Age of Aquarius!" Which I did, with gusto.
Others in traffic were more aloof:
- - -
Oh, and it's my birthday. I'm old! My girlfriends are converging tonight at a restaurant with plenty of wine and we'll all pretend I don't have wrinkles. God love 'em.
Posted by laurie at 10:54 AM
June 17, 2010
At the Movies
A couple of weeks ago, Jennifer and I went to See "Sex and the City 2." After just ten minutes, we walked out. I don't think I have ever walked out of a movie before, but definitely not after just ten minutes.
I have asked for my money back on a movie, though. (Not for Sex and the City, sadly. We used passes. Still a waste.) The movie I got my money back for seeing was "Sommersby
So I did what audiences are expected to do in a movie -- suspend reality, sink into it. And now I am going to tell you how it ends, so if your whole life you wanted to see Somersby and still want a surprise you should stop reading.
This movie strings you along into a deepening fantasy and romantic love story for 112 minutes of your life and then in the last two minutes they suddenly wake up, decide to inject REALITY into the plot and kill the romantic hero. Kill him off, just like that. The end, roll the effing credits, screw you, audience! You thought it was a Cinderella tale set in the Reconstruction? Ha! Fooled you! Suckers!
I have never hated a movie as much as I hated that movie. So I marched over to the ticket booth and demanded our money back and got it. It was also the night I developed my "Somersby Theory of Moviegoing" which has now been expanded to books and TV shows. I will not spend my time or money on a movie (or show or book, usually, though sometimes I give books more of a pass) that asks me to suspend disbelief for a portion of my life and then at the end injects some flawed reality just for the hell of it and kills off the person you're invested in. Won't do it. It's FANTASY, people. Unless I am watching an autobiography, I do not want your reality. I want costumes, hair, makeup, and a script that doesn't cop out with a sad tearjerker cemetery scene just because the writer had no idea how to craft a decent ending.
So now I ask. I ask ahead of time, "Does the dragon/dog/ogre/hot leading actor die in the end?" It drives some people crazy. They cannot fathom wanting to know the end before it happens. For them, the whole movie is about the twist at the end. But I can't relax if I think I'm about to get Somersbied. Some people refuse to tell me so I have to google it instead.
The most recent example was "The Hurt Locker
"Cindi," I asked, "does the cute guy die at the end?"
"I'm not telling you that!" said Cindi. She was aghast. Offended, even.
"No, I really want to know. I have to know before I see it," I said.
"No way," she said. "That ruins the whole movie."
"Oh really?" I asked. "Maybe it ruins the movie for you, but for some of us who spent over two hours worrying about the fate of the freaking teddy bear in 'A.I.
She just stared. Apparently she did not see AI, or if she did, she managed to move past the perils of the teddy bear and see the actual movie happening around it. She refused to tell me if Jeremy Renner's character died or not so I had to google it. The internet has made my Somersby Theory much more enforceable.
I saw The Hurt Locker and it was tense, even knowing the outcome, but the good kind of tense. Enjoyable. There are some movies my Somersby Theory has saved me from, though. "Phenomenon" comes to mind. "Powder." Some movie years ago with a dragon. There was a time in the 1990s when every other movie had some horrible "let's kill the protagonist" ending. It was like an entire generation of screenwriters wrote themselves into a box and at the end the only way they could wrap it up was to kill the main character and roll the credits. "City of Angels" was outstandingly awful (HATED HATED that movie. You want me to buy Nicholas Cage as an angel and then two hours later you want to turn your movie into some stupid nightly news show about a senseless car wreck? Maybe it worked in the original German version in the 1980s but a 1990s hollywood blockbuster remake with an almost insultingly bad ending? COME ON. Like a surgeon would ride a bike on a blind curve on an unfamiliar mountain road with her EYES SHUT.) (Come to think of it, I got my money back on that movie, too.)
I know that everyone is not like me and some will find this insane. Some people like being jerked into reality, some people like jagged endings, some people like horror movies and being scared and surprised. Me, I like knowing ahead of time. I flip to the last page in a particularly engaging mystery book. Yep, you heard me. I like to know how it ends because then I can go back and enjoy the unraveling of the story. After all, it's fiction, it's fantasy. Maybe it's because in real life I never know what will happen next. Or maybe I'm just wound too tightly. It doesn't bother me one bit but Lord it seems to freak other people out. The idea of the surprise ending is sacrosanct.
I just like to know ahead, is all. Preparation is the key to success!
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Comments are still off because I have not managed to fix or break anything with great success.
Posted by laurie at 06:40 AM
June 07, 2010
Cat Week begins! Like Shark Week with 100% less sharks!
Hi! I'm going to be doing a much needed overhaul to the software of this website and working on the database which makes me sound very technical but I am giving you this disclaimer because:
1) At any time this website and any of its eleventynine million pages will probably all break, often, and if the site disappears for a while you know it was just that button I pushed that time. Whoops!
2) Do not fear, I have a backup.
3) But comments will be off as I try to make major updates to how they function, like having your name look like it's part of the comment. HUH. GOOD IDEA.
4) Also I'm going to try adding normal size ad spaces and when I get it working I may need you to help me test it all out. And if I manage to do most of that without completely breaking the whole server I will even try to PDF some of the lengthy patterns, like the loop stitch tutorial, but don't hold your breath on that one. At least not in a week. But maybe!
So thank you for your patience as I muck around and try to imitate a person who knows what she is doing. If you are a person who knows MT fairly well and want to offer me advice I am 100% open to that! I also accept prayer in time of database reassessment.
It is so much easier to get work done with the good help I have:
He is not transparent.
But he is very helpy.
Posted by laurie at 08:14 AM
June 02, 2010
Is it tacky for me to wear white? Should we do an evite since it's better for the environment? Am I going to hell for writing this?
When the news broke yesterday that Al and Tipper Gore were separating I wouldn't say I was happy because having endured the end of a marriage myself obviously I feel deep compassion for them and then I wrote my new name, Mrs. Al Gore, twenty times in my notebook. Or should I hyphenate? I had a hard time picking out a china pattern that was produced in an eco-friendly factory. We may have to go with vintage Fiestaware. And I guess we'll have to split our time between L.A. and Tennessee, which is so convenient because I LOVE Tennessee! I worked on his first campaign for President you know. Back when he was wearing the red plaid shirt, I was still in high school. Not that I stalked at an early age. I was just very civic minded.
Seriously, though ... I was shocked to hear they're ending their marriage. I thought those two would be together forever and it makes me a little sad.
Also, it will be harder for us to have a private ceremony with all the paparazzi hanging around.
Will Bob like his new daddy? Will I be able to dial down my addiction to paper towels? Will my bridesmaids have to wear dresses made out of recycled tea bags? So many questions.
By the way, you are all TOTALLY invited to the wedding.
Posted by laurie at 05:03 AM | Comments (161)
June 01, 2010
May wrap-up ... welcome June, New Start # 276
The very best part of a brand-new month is that it's a fresh start. I'm almost halfway through the year and this is as good a time as any to have stumbled and get up again, reboot. After all, in general people don't change their whole life in a day (or 151 days). You try, you fail, you try more, eventually you get better ... or you move and change your name. Actually I'm glad these are my challenges. If I didn't have this stuff to work on I'm sure I'd find some other messes to get in and muck around with and they'd probably cost more.
So I did accomplish one goal in May -- I ate more vegetables than I did in April. Largely because April was the nutritional equivalent of a deep-fried snickers bar. Set the bar low enough and you are bound to succeed.
Actually in May I crossed a major veggie barrier. I have never in the past purchased fresh, pre-cut, pre-washed vegetables (for example, baggies of broccoli, baby carrots and cauliflower.) When you grow up poor you grow up with a thrift mentality about some things, you know? For some folks it's re-using baggie ties, others cannot let go of a gift bag, or order the more expensive entree on the menu during a group lunch (even though you know in advance everyone will split the check evenly and you will feel cheated.) I'm not judging -- everyone has their stuff. For me, it was buying the broccoli and cauliflower whole and then cutting and chopping and cleaning it at home because to me those pre-cut vegetables just smacked of wasted money. Interestingly enough, my monetary moral high horse stops at the crudites, because I have no problem buying bagged salad and pre-shredded cheese.
Like I said, everyone has their stuff.
This month I crossed over that line. One night mid-month I wanted roasted broccoli and cauliflower for dinner which in itself is a minor miracle. It was a work night, however, so I had no time to stand in the kitchen and cut and pare and clean and soak and so on. Traffic had been more heinous than usual, the day was long, the commute was long, everything had been a drain. I contemplated my fast food options and realized no matter where I went or what I bought it would still cost me more than the $2.39 for a baggie of chopped and washed broccoli and cauliflower. That's right -- I ran the numbers on McDonald's value meal versus a baggie of pre-chopped vegetables!
So I stopped at the market on the way home and grabbed a few bags of pre-cut vegetables and loaded up on some two-buck-chuck.
I got home that night and dumped the pre-cut vegetables in a big bowl. Preheated the oven to 400F, added lemon juice, olive oil, salt and pepper to the vegetables, a little garlic salt, a sprinkle of cayenne. It was so fast! Spread them on a baking sheet and put them in the oven. I roasted them while I was upstairs changing clothes and washing my face. Dinner was a huge helping of delicious goodness and it took me less than three minutes to prepare and just 30 minutes to cook. Topped with Parmesan cheese it was comfort in a bowl.
That was my major May accomplishment.
The rest of May is a blur of wine and stress and cheetos. I walked twice in May. Two days out of 31. No es bueno, senor.
May was... metaphorical tremors in one life. It was exhausting. May was other people taking my inventory and finding me lacking -- and then me finally deciding these people are high on glue and simply pointing out my flaws because they're bored. It was sentences that ended in prepositions. It was figuring out where the line is drawn. It was doing laundry every day and somehow still having no clean underwear.
It's all right. June is all about change and I am right there with it. YES. Most every night in May I had a minor freak out but talked myself off the ledge. Isn't that what the Year of Yes is all about? Talking yourself off the window ledge?
There is nothing but the open expanse of June ahead. I have no idea what will happen, but I'm here. That is where I am. And I have several bags of pre-cut vegetables in the fridge and more two-buck Chuck than you can shake a stick at.
(Ends with a preposition)
- - -
My goals for June are:
1) Think of three things each day to relish and appreciate (My three today are: Dad, cats, Jeep.)
2) Eat vegetables
3) Believe there is another possibility that I just haven't considered yet.
I once heard Marianne Williamson
That's my favorite quote right now, I put it on a post-it note on my bathroom mirror.
Oh don't forget to stir the veggies halfway through roasting. Gets them all evenly brown.
Posted by laurie at 07:07 AM | Comments (133)
May 27, 2010
Thankyouthankyou
For the times you took out of your day to comment or email, I thank you.
For just reading or checking in, thank you.
For laughing at my dumbaii jokes... THANK YOU!
There have been times, especially in the past six weeks, when you have made me laugh and given me things to research and think about and it has been a Godsend. It kept me breathing.
I don't get to thank you often enough. So thank you.
Also, you've lost weight and I love what you did with your hair.
Posted by laurie at 12:52 AM | Comments (171)
May 24, 2010
Good morning!
There's nothing quite like waking on a Monday morning to the sound of multiple helicopters hovering over your rooftop. But more on that later.
First! What a great day on Saturday. The San Juan Capistrano library is really pretty and the whole town is so charming. They even have a little reflecting pool at the library in a lovely courtyard:
They made a special parking space just for The Red Jeep:
Here are Lori and Ada, two ladies who invited me down to speak:
Lori introducing me and also showing the knitted pieces she'd made from patterns I've posted (which was very exciting for me, I never think anyone ever makes this stuff!)
I was a little nervous so some of my crowd shots were a bit shaky, I only got one clear pic of half the room:
Some folks who visited with me:
Dee brought her dad!
I met this gal once before, in Mission Viejo. Nice to see you again!
Sisters! One came all the way from Sacramento!!
It was a really lovely day and there were even refreshments-- delicious cookies and fresh coffee and iced tea. I loved meeting everyone. Oh, one of the ladies asked to see a picture of my finished socks, so here is a picture for Linda:
That is the one and only time they have been on my feet. I took the picture of my be-socked feet, took the socks off, carefully folded them and put them away in a drawer lest I ruin them by wearing them. Yup. Linda was also concerned about how fast I talk and my general lack of public speaking aptitude and suggested I do Toastmasters, which she said had helped her tremendously. On the loooong drive home I thought about her comments for a good stretch of the 5 freeway, and while I appreciated the feedback I have finally had a Come To Jesus moment ... I have decided it's OK not to be great at everything. What a relief!
It was a revelation. One does not have to be great at all things! You don't even have to be good at all things. Or competent. For example, I will never rock at synchronized swimming, or tennis, or calculus. I know with absolute clarity I will never be great at submarine driving or performing heart surgery or playing the clarinet. And I will never be smooth at public speaking. I will talk too fast and shake and sound twangy and sweat a lot and overshare. The fact that I no longer barf after each event and the very notion that I leave my house and do something that terrifies me is fine enough progress for me. I'll take it.
I am sure Toastmasters is great for so many people but I have made the executive decision to be happy with being less than mediocre at talking in public. And instead of focusing more energy on something I don't love, I would rather put all that time and energy into becoming better at stuff I truly enjoy like writing and knitting and learning to cook and gardening and cat herding. I never wanted to be a public speaker and I know I'm goofy which is why I appreciate all the more every person who comes to these events and doesn't expect anything other than just a silly, sweaty fun time. Tony Robbins I am not. I can make coffee nervous.
So that was Saturday. It was fun to meet you all! I loved seeing what everyone was knitting and the coffee was delicious and the KnitLits and Knitsters were a pure delight to meet. Connie, thank you for the tea, I already made a cup yesterday morning and it was delicious. OH-- and I met a friend of Ellen Bloom's! Adding more fuel to my theory that Ellen is the Seven Degrees of Kevin Bacon of the yarn world. And Lori gave me a guided tour of the library which is beautiful and peaceful. Plus I got the opportunity to decide for myself that I am OK with being not great at something. And there were cookies. A very good day.
- - -
This morning I woke to the sounds of multiple helicopters hovering over my rooftop. As I lay there in the bed I pondered the possibilities:
1) Overnight tsunami made the new shoreline of Southern California somewhere around Ventura Blvd.
2) Lindsey Lohan passed out in car outside Valley sushi restaurant
3) Hostage situation near the Marc Jacobs bags in Bloomies
4) Alien Invasion
5) Traffic
I turned on the TV and discovered it was not aliens but was instead traffic. The 101 Freeway is totally shut down westbound in Sherman Oaks.
High speed chase, crash, officer-involved shooting, helicopters. Hello, Monday!
Posted by laurie at 06:42 AM | Comments (91)
May 21, 2010
Mañana
Der Frankieschnitzel, the decoration of the family. In the light from the capiz lamps she looks partially pink.
Yesterday Reader Kate wrote:
If I'm not a knitter... will it be awkward at your book reading on Saturday? I have no patience for it myself - although I enjoy the results from my mom & others. I just didn't know how the whole knitting section usually goes and I didn't want to feel awkward or un-cool with the group.
No knitting needed or required! In fact, most people will not have yarny delights on hand, so I always add in that it's OK to bring them since it's usually the other way around, with people feeling awkward to whip out a knitted work in progress in a bookstore or library.
Perhaps awkwardness, or the fear of being awkward, is the real human condition?
Hmmmm, too much to ponder so early!
See you tomorrow!
May 22 at 2 p.m.
San Juan Capistrano Regional Library
31495 El Camino Real
San Juan Capistrano, CA 92675
[ MAP ]
Posted by laurie at 06:51 AM | Comments (28)
May 19, 2010
See you on Saturday!
Bob helps me write.
I really hope you can make it Saturday, it will be fun!
May 22 at 2 p.m. San Juan Capistrano Regional Library 31495 El Camino Real San Juan Capistrano, CA 92675
We're going to have a great day in a beautiful city! I'll read a bit from the book or some other who knows what, and then you can ask any old question you want and I'll answer and blather onward and upward and will sign books. Oh, and bring your knitting! I'll bring mine. It's now two centimeters long and will be completed in 2019.
Yesterday I got an email from the gal organizing this shindig, her name is Lori A. She wrote:
Also, we have a fax machine here that just will not die, so if you feel like bringing your machine-breaking talents with you, it would be greatly appreciated. The Mission is having the all-day Battle of the Mariachis on Saturday, but we don't think it will affect the parking - there are lots of lots around this area. Besides, knitters can take Mariachis any day.
How do you not love a place that A) wants to employ my magical breaking powers and B) is already throwing gauntlets to the mariachis?
LOVE LOVE LOVE
The brains behind it all. Totally ready to eat a mariachi for breakfast, with a side of fancy feast.
Posted by laurie at 08:34 PM | Comments (49)
May 14, 2010
Don't be a drag, participate. Clams on the half shell and roller-skates ... roller-skates!
'Cause these are the good times... leave your cares behind...
Hello, Friday.
You know once you get into thinking about three good things for the day it gets easier to think of one more and one more. Sometimes they're small, and that is A-Ok. Like today mine are:
1) Two-buck Chuck (it's a whole line of wines from Trader Joe's that are just $1.99 a bottle and not bad at all.) We have a date later tonight. I'll be looking hot, he'll be wearing a label and nothing else.
2) The smell of an old book.
3) Romantic comedies. Tonight I'm going to re-watch Sweet Home Alabama, I just have the urge to hear Reese Witherspoon say, "You have a baby! In a bar."
What are your favorite romantic comedies? Working Girl? Pretty Woman? Bridget Jones? Cats & Dogs
Maybe I'll make it a rom-com weekend. What do you recommend ... Romancing the Stone? 9-to-5? The Princess Bride? Under the Tuscan Sun? Say Anything? High Fidelity? I always love your book and movie suggestions. I'm convinced you are the most hilarious and interesting audience online (Good thing #6, a million times over.) You always have excellent taste. And while I'm at it, I swear you look like you've lost weight.
Oh! One last thing (good thing #7). In just a little over a week I'm doing my very first ever speaking engagement at a public library! I am SO excited, which if you knew me would shock you since I generally have to be very medicated to speak in public. But libraries are where I grew up, it's like second church for me. To be asked to speak at one is just beyond great. Here's the details:
May 22 at 2 p.m.
San Juan Capistrano Regional Library
31495 El Camino Real
San Juan Capistrano, CA 92675
I hope you can make it. We'll have a great day, I'll read a bit from the book (or maybe one of the essays that never made my editor's cut, who knows!) and then you can ask any old question you want and I'll answer and sweat nervously. Oh, and bring your knitting! The ladies organizing this event have a book and knitting group called The Knit Lits. BEST NAME EVER. (Good thing #8.)
Well, having said all that, let us now go forth and participate in Friday. Clams on the halfshell and roller skates, roller skates!
Posted by laurie at 12:04 AM | Comments (334)
May 12, 2010
Wednnnnesddaye
First, thank you to everyone who didn't send me a note yesterday taking me to task for the one word in my headline that was a typo. While I have done many things in life, I have never contacted a stranger to point out their crappy typing. But hey, I'm no angel. For one thing, I look terrible in white. In the sixth grade I knowingly kissed a boy I knew my other sixth-grade friend luuurved. And I once reported an aggressive tailgating driver to the CHP as a possible drunken crazypants. To me my typos are just a given, not like that time I hauled off and beat up a guy with an umbrella in the middle of Paris.
Then again, if you ever saw me type you'd be amazed I spell anything correctly. I type with three fingers and one thumb, like a monkey on a bender. And I'm fast. It's a sight to behold. I guess I don't care about typos all that much since I'm usually typing at 4 a.m. in bed on a laptop with half a cat butt on the keyboard. But I get it. For some people, it's all about the spellcheck. I don't spellcheck. I don't sleep. Is there a connection? I'll take Possible Correlations for $200, Alex!
Most of the time I teeter between relaxed and pinched but lately it's all pinched. This has been a very inneresting time, so much so that I called Drew up two weeks ago and asked, "What the hell is in Uranus?" and he said, "Mars is in Uranus and my Uranus and make it go away!"
(This is probably only funny if you are a big dweeb who laughs every time someone says Uranus, which is just not often enough.)
Sometimes when something's up Uranus, I self-medicate with wine and chicken tacos. The taco is truly a perfect food, much like a cheeseburger. When things go poorly and a taco isn't enough, I like to fantasize about stapling things to people. I am often not a very nice person. Jennifer used to say they were reserving a special little room in hell for catty wenches such as ourselves, but I figure the company down there will probably be more fun anyway. And you won't need a coat.
Whenever I question the blackness of my shriveled soul, I try to remember the one time I was faced with a great temptation to become even more morally bankrupt and I chose to pass on the opportunity. Which is not exactly irrefutable proof of being a good person, but it is a step in the right direction.
It was a few years ago -- 2004 to be exact. My then-husband had just all-the-sudden up and moved out and on the same day he was packing up all the good DVDs and moving off to his new life, my job was transferring all of us to a new building downtown so I went into work on a Saturday and pretended everything was hunky dorey and unpacked all my stupid design books and stupid sharpies and pasted a smile on my face and acted like a normal person whose life wasn't unraveling at the seams.
The new building had all kinds of safety features the old one didn't have -- it's like the pentagon around here. You need a badge to get into the hallway where the elevators are, a badge to punch any button in the elevator and then you swipe in again on your floor to get into the office. We were all getting used to this and the security guys in the building were helpful, and nice, and not nearly as cheesy and mackdaddified as the security dudes in the old building.
That whole period of time is a big hazy ring of smoke. Mostly from despair and also a LOT of smoking. I was smoking at least a pack a day easy, and I would go out on breaks to the smoker's annex behind the building and sit alone and stare at the ground and smoke.
One of the security guards at that time was a friendly older guy, we'll call him Robie [not his real name!] Robie was from West Africa, and he had that lilting accent which is kind of soothing, and he was in his late 60s, and he would walk the back of the building and he was kind and grandfatherly and never lectured me about smoking, because he was a smoker too. Ah, I miss smoking. Anyway, before long he would offer me a light for the ever-present Capri cigarette in my hand and one day out of the blue he gently asked me why I was so sad.
"What...?" I asked. Because surely I was holding it together SO WELL.
"You just seem a little sad is all," said Robie.
And as the weeks and months passed it was nice to have someone to say hello to on my smoke breaks and I did eventually tell Robie that I'd been dumped unceremoniously and I wasn't taking it too well. Which was sort of obvious to everyone but people are kind and keep up appearances for you sometimes. He was a good listener and a nice smoking companion for ten minutes a day.
One day I was working late and it was dark outside and I was leaving the building and Robie asked me if I wanted an escort to the garage. The garage is a few blocks away from the building and it's a creepy walk alone at night, so I said yes and thank you.
As we walked he asked me how I was and it was just bad timing, I think, but I did that horrible thing where I burst out into tears (it happened a lot around that time) and told him I was pretty sure my husband was seeing someone else and wanted a divorce and I told him about the awful financial mess and the DVDs ("He took Billy Jack! He hated Billy Jack! Why didn't he just leave Billy Jack with me?") and finally I stopped crying and we had a smoke on the benches outside the garage then I thanked him and apologized profusely and went home, ashamed and feeling stupid for always embarrassing myself with the crying.
A few days passed and Robie found me out back, smoking behind the building.
"I have been thinking of your dilemma," he said. "I think I have a solution for you."
"You do?" I asked. Because I'd racked my mind for months and no solution had come. I was definitely open to solutions.
He looked around discreetly to be sure we couldn't be heard by the other smokers covertly cowering away from prying corporate eyes.
"I know a woman," he said, in his lilting accent. "She is a Nigerian .... doctor. Sort of doctor. She can make cures and she can help you, if you want. I can put you in touch with her. She is a very special person. I think she can make your problem disappear."
And maybe it was the way he said it. She can make your problem disappear. Or perhaps it was some of the stories I'd read about voodoo and I don't even know if that's what he was talking about, really, except I kind of did, because I had goosebumps and not the good kind. It was the way he said it. And for just a minute I thought about it -- I have a wild imagination and it only took a second -- and then I sighed. I was too much of a wuss. I'd be lying if I told you the idea of pulling an Angel Heart and going all voodoo on the ex wasn't enticing, but I couldn't do it. I just couldn't.
"Robie, thank you, I really do appreciate it, but I'm going to do it the old-fashioned way," I said. "You know, with an incompetent, overpriced lawyer and a lot of wine."
And he never brought it up again, and eventually I stopped smoking and then a few months later he stopped working at our building and I haven't seen him in years. I actually I forgot about it for a long while, that whole conversation, Robie's offer of help. It wasn't until much later when I met a woman at one of my booksignings who had recently gone through a horrible, long, expensive divorce herself and she said, joking of course, "It would have been cheaper if I'd just offed him!" and I remembered Robie and the witch doctor. Because I feel very certain that's what she was, just from his tone of voice, the way he described her.
And while it isn't proof exactly of being a good person, it is at least proof that when faced with temptation I do try to tread on the side of the not-entirely-heinous. Sometimes.
But Lord I do miss smoking. And I am a really really crappy typist.
Posted by laurie at 12:06 AM | Comments (96)
May 06, 2010
Airnarium and aquarium
Traveling is always an adventure, sometimes the most trepidatious part is just sitting beside a stranger for so many hours. On the way from L.A. to JFK, I sat next to a guy who was completely addicted to his cellphone. He wasn't the only one, so was the lady in the seat in front of me. They both talked on their phones as they boarded the plane, they were talking as we waited for the plane to fill and eventually they were holding up the plane because neither would hang up so we could take off.
The lady in front of me was on an urgent call that went like this, "Yeah, I'm just sitting on the plane now. Huh? Yeah, I got a coke before but forgot to buy something to eat. Well there was one place but everything else was still closed. Yeah, I liked that bagel shop we went to that time..." and so on. Clearly too enthralling to hang up when the announcement was made for the third time to please turn off all cell phones. Now. Please.
The guy beside me was funny. He was obviously addicted to his cell phone, too, and antsy about being unable to use it for a few hours. You see people like this all over the city, they can't stand to sit still and be silent for even a second. He was talking when he was walking down the aisle of the plane and as soon as that conversation ended, he immediately called another person and another and another until the flight attendant had to stand over him and take his phone away as if he were a naughty six-year-old. He was probably in his mid-forties. All his conversations were as urgent and compelling as the gal in the seat ahead of us: "Hey, you talk to Mike yet? Did he see that movie I told him about? I knew if he liked poker he'd like it. You eat breakfast yet? Yeah, well, we were late for the plane so I haven't even had a coffee. Oh right, Ok, talk to you later." (click) (dials phone) "Hey! Mike, it's Sy. You see that movie I told you about? Yeah, well I knew if you liked poker you'd like it. Man, I am dying for a coffee..." and on and on and on.
When the flight attendant took away his phone he fidgeted until we were in the air and then promptly fell asleep with his mouth open.
My mom and I flew together from JFK to Bermuda, so that was nice. Then on the flight back I was in a row by myself from Bermuda to JFK, and from JFK to LAX I sat next to a guy with a bad case of IPS -- Imaginary Package Syndrome. You know the guys who have an imaginary package so large they have to spread their legs really wide and encroach into your personal space to accommodate that enormously huge imaginary schlong? Yep, I sat next to that guy.
I'm really glad they don't allow people to make cell phone calls in flight. I hope they never change that rule. Even with my headphones on I could hear my seatmates talking, and I have those fancy schmancy noise-canceling headphones. The idea of sitting next to someone for six hours and listening to them natter on and on would surely increase the passenger air rage quotient, no? Of course it does nothing to address the prevalence of dudes with Imaginary Package Syndrome. Some things you just have to make jokes about.
- - -
One of the highlights of our sightseeing on vacation was visiting the local aquarium. I love aquariums, there's something so peaceful and beautiful about watching the fish and reading all the information about each display. It appeals to my dorky science-geek self as well as the "I want to view nature in air-conditioned comfort" side of my personality.
My favorite is always the octopus (they're so smart!) and I love all the wacky sea plant-animals, like anemones and coral and urchins. Sea horses and jellyfish are big favorites, too, though there weren't any of those at this particular aquarium. There was a giant living reef display that stretched along a wall and had some very big fish. And sharks! They're so fascinating. I've known some sharks, actually. Except the ones I knew were dressed in people clothes.
Most of my pictures turned out great, so I'm going to bore you with a ton of them! (The key is to never use flash. I love my little Canon point-and-shoot
Some of the fish had people faces. I find aquatic life endlessly fascinating. Do they get bored with swimming? Are they uncomfortable in the aquarium? Or is it all the same when you're a fish? If there are any fish reading, let me know. After all on the internet, no one knows you're an octopus...
Posted by laurie at 06:33 AM | Comments (88)
May 05, 2010
In Bermuda, they're just called "shorts"
The other options for the title were, "I survived the Bermuda Triangle and all I got was this silly hangover" or "Bermuda, Bahama, come on pretty Mama..."
So, hi! Guess who went to Bermuda over the weekend?
Me and my mom. It was her birthday. Happy Birthday!
Bermuda is breathtakingly beautiful. It is someplace I never really had a hankering to visit and I sort of learned my lesson visiting Hawaii alone that island resort destinations are not the best places for me to travel solo (whereas in a big city or a European trek you can travel alone without drawing attention to your single status.) Alone on an island in a place full of tourists undocking two-by-two from giant cruise ships... well, it's like shining a spotlight on yourself, Hello! I am alone in paradise! So Bermuda was not on my current list of places to see. Then one day several months ago I got an email alert from American Airlines with an insane sale on all sorts of beachy places and they had tickets to Bermuda for $117 each way.
At first I thought it was a typo, because that was cheaper than a ticket to San Jose. But it was for real and I called my mom and said, "Hey, want to go off to Bermuda for your birthday?" And just like that we were booked and ready to go. And the trip couldn't have come at a more perfect time for both of us, who needed to get away and relax and we realized on this trip we've never done anything like this before, never traveled alone together for a weekend or ever. I got to have her all to myself for a whole weekend!
And we were truly in paradise:
There's my mom, also named Laurie, checking out the sunset from the patio of our hotel room.
It was so much fun! We got in on Friday night and I think I slept more soundly than I have in months, and we got up the next morning to the most beautiful view out our patio doors. And we took a water taxi into Hamilton (and you know you're on vacation when A) you're on a boat taxi and B) the boat driver has his dog along.)
Boat-loving dog.
Lauries on a boat
In Hamilton we went to lunch at a pub that caught on fire (listen, it's not vacation with me unless something is on fire!) and we had just placed our order and taken a sip of iced tea when the fire alarm sounded so we all filed outside and waited a bit and nothing seemed to be happening, except all the waiters decided to sit on the stoop and smoke, so my mom and I moseyed down to the next pub and had a delicious meal.
Afterward, we wandered around Hamilton a bit and made it to the bus station where we bought a two-day transportation pass (only $20 each) and boarded a big pink bus for a trip to the Aquarium and St. George.
The pink buses were comfortable, safe and very economical with the pass, which you can also use to get on board the water ferries.
Midway to St. George, we stopped off at the Aquarium. I love aquariums! Luckily my mom does, too. And she actually read the guidebook instead of just looking at the pictures like some people we know, so she knew how to get us there. Tomorrow I'll post all the pictures we took there, but here's one for today:
Hmmm, which one of us is the exhibit and which one of us is the observer?
The next day we saw Dockyard and then took a bus all the way back to get a view of the interior a bit more. It was great. Here's Laurie waiting for the big ferry to Dockyard:
View from the maritime museum.
Cheesy and tipsy self-portrait
We talked to Dad on Skype and showed him the view of the balcony and the room! (That's my newer ASUS Eee PC
When you're looking for your next off-season deal to somewhere new, Bermuda would be an excellent choice for anyone. I might even go back solo, who knows. It's incredibly clean and the people we met were hands-down the friendliest of any place I have ever visited. The food is great, the public transportation is easy, the island is so beautiful it's just breathtaking and it's so painless to get there and back. They even have a US Customs post right in the Bermuda airport so you go through customs in-island (instead of most foreign travel, where you deplane on your first stop on the U.S. and go through border control in a giant line.)
I will always think of it as the spot where I had the most relaxing time with my mom and laughed more in one weekend than I have laughed in ages.
Sunset view from the room.
Posted by laurie at 06:02 AM | Comments (106)
May 01, 2010
May Check in
A brief one. April was the sands of the hourglass, so are the days of our lives, cue dramatic music, wear too much makeup, sigh dramatically.
So here it is:
Goal One: Get Healthy (Actions)
Well, OK. So that happened.
The mere fact that I did not spend last month sleeping on the floor of a Jack-in-the-Box so I could absorb deep-fried items 24/7 is a miracle. There was one day when I was driving home from work, blubbering but trying not to be too obvious about it, and I looked over and saw a woman in a Volkswagon Jetta lighting up a cigarette and I thought, "I MUST HAVE ONE NOW." And yet I just drove myself home. I didn't stop at 7-11 and buy a carton of Marlboro lights and I am counting that as a major victory.
Granted, I did go into my earthquake kit and dig out the boxed wine I have on hand in case of emergencies (it was an emergency of sorts) but I haven't smoked now in what... three? four? years and I saw her light up and I was thisclose to just giving up entirely on health and well-being, which tells you all you need to know about my April without me going into the sordid details.
Awesome month! So happy it is over!
I did not walk every day. Or any day, except all that walking to and from the bus stops when my Jeep was in the shop. I did spend several days during the month cleaning obsessively which I count as exercise. My neighbors are probably all plotting to break my Dyson under cover of darkness. I actually Magic Erasered some of the paint off the walls. Oops.
Also, I ate junk food. Into every life some junk food will fall. It happens. In the long run, getting an order of drive-thru french fries was probably better than starting smoking again so I am cutting myself some slack. But I did manage some good meals including making myself tuna salad which does not have any lettuce in it but does have the word "salad" in the name!
So for the month I just sort of maintained. I was not super healthy but not completely in the ditch. As Scarlett would say, tomorrow is another day!
Goal Two: Yes (Attitude)
This Year of Yes thing has been like that old proverb where you ask God for patience and he sends you a traffic jam.
Yeah, HEE-larious.
But you know what? I'm still making jokes and I have my cats and my friends and family and my avalanche of yarn and it's good. There have been all sorts of changes happening in the mechanics of my life (and listen, I don't always embrace rocky changes that well) (you think?) and I think I am handling it not too badly. Etc. etc. Also I am right now doing something very fun which I will tell you about later and so May is already looking better than all of April and here it's only been May for like an hour.
May Goals
In May I want to try again to walk every day for the month (eventually I will make this goal) and I want to eat more vegetables. I also want to remember not to spend energy defending my unhappiness and instead to put that energy into writing, knitting, cleaning house, hanging out with friends, cooking, anything else. That is what the Yes Year is all about, deciding deliberately to let go of festering and embrace something, anything else.
And now it's May. May, two-thousand-ten. Crazypants.
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[Comments are not available today.]
Posted by laurie at 04:24 AM
April 30, 2010
Good ole Rocky Top! Rocky Top, Tennessee!
Yesterday I got myself (and some of the commenters, whoops) stuck singing Rocky Top all afternoon. I had not thought of that song in forever and all the sudden I was singing it and remembered every single word. How is it possible that I do not remember my own phone number yet I know that once two strangers climbed ol' Rocky Top looking for a moonshine still?
Strangers ain't come down from Rocky Top, reckon they never will.
I don't even remember when I first learned that song but I know we used to sing it obsessively at 4-H camp in the summers. I LOVED 4-H camp. It was out at a campground somewhere in the sticks and we stayed in cabins and sang songs and got lice and all that great country kid summer stuff. I loved running with my pack of friends and making braided keychains and using a router to burn my name in a piece of 2x4, something I'm guessing today's sheltered nine-year-olds don't get to do lest they burn a finger off.
The other song we sang over and over and over was the Cider song:
Sipping Cider Through A StrawThe prettiest girl [Echo.], I ever saw, [Echo.]
Was sipping cider through a straw.
[Repeat previous two lines.]
I asked her if, [Echo.] she'd show me how, [Echo.]
To sip that cider through a straw.
[Repeat previous two lines.](except we would sing it like this: I asked her if -- I asked her if -- she'd show me how -- she'd show me how -- to sip some ciiiiider through a straw -- der through a straw!)
Then cheek to cheek, and jaw to jaw,
We sipped that cider through a straw.
Every now and then, the straw would slip,
And we'd sip cider lip to lip (lip to lip!)The parson came to her backyard,
A sipping cider from a straw.
And now I have a mother-in-law,
And fourteen kids to call me Pa.
The moral of this story is,
To sip your cider from a pail!
Actually, I am surprised our bus driver didn't go mentally insane after listening to two hours of cy-dee-eye-dee-eye-der from a straw! We also sang a rather rousing rendition of "On Top of Spaghetti." I still sing it sometimes in my car. I am an excellent singer when no one is listening.
So, there you go, happy Friday. You can thank me later for the therapy bills incurred from not being able to shake camp songs. Wild as a mink and sweet as a soda pop, I still dream about that!
Posted by laurie at 03:50 AM | Comments (115)
April 29, 2010
A Good Day
Last night was the first night in two weeks I've had a good night's sleep. I even slept in (until almost five, wow, livin' dangerously!) I felt like a different person. I woke up feeling good.
Going without sleep makes you crazypants. The worst part is waking up at 1:30 and again at 2:45 and 3:15 because your body drifted off to sleep and your brain wants you to WAKE UP UP RIGHTNOW and remember this other thing your forgot to worry about earlier. Thanks, brain. Thanks for the memories.
But last night I slept all the way through. I didn't even set my alarm clock, and I only woke up when Soba stretched out and pressed her tiny little feet into my back and yawned her kittycat yawn. And now I've made a cup of coffee and I have my notebook and I'm going to make a list because every good day starts with a good list.
- - -
Were you shocked Siobhan got the boot on American Idol? I was really surprised. I still want Crystal to win it all and I still want to get trapped in a Casey/Lee sandwich soon, but I was a little sad to see Siobhan go.
- - -
Thanks to all who entered the giveaways lately, I was waiting on email back from one of the winners but now everyone is in. Congrats to:
Leslie in AZ -- Hannah's List + $50
Mary in TN -- Hannah's List
Kate in Ohio -- Hannah's List
Seanna from MA -- Men Knits/Comfort Afghans/Wine book
Congratulations! In May, which is ridiculously just a few days away, I have several sock knitting books to give away and wine books and one big fat hardback Martha Stewart book that is so pretty. I'm really happy you all like doing this stuff because I still can't believe people want to send me books to giveaway, how cool is that? And I love doing it!
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Finally, I am SO EXCITED about an event coming up in May. I'll be speaking at the San Juan Capistrano Regional Library on May 22nd at 2 p.m. I'll do a reading in which I will probably sound twangy and then I'll take all your questions and we may even knit a little, too. San Juan Capistrano is BEAUTIFUL, and this is the first time I've been invited to speak at a library which, for a kid who practically grew up in a library, is a dream come true. Wow, I like commas. Like, commas.
San Juan Capistrano Regional Library
31495 El Camino Real
San Juan Capistrano, CA 92675
May 22 at 2 p.m.
I'll post more details as I get them.
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OH! Edited to add in a comment that Susan in Illinois left yesterday:
Can I throw something out there, knitting-like? A question. I have a stash, not a room, but a stash that is kind of hefty. Recently I am feeling the need to purge of excess clutter. Couple that with the weird part of me that requires me to buy new yarn for new projects, not shopping the stash, I am thinking maybe I should sell, donate, purge? Does this happen to anyone else? I. Must. Have. New. For any craft project I embark upon. It makes me think it would be nice to have a lending library of yarn, sewing, embroidery and other things I like to collect, just like books. I'm fine to borrow books from the library - if I really like them I put them on my Amazon wish list. Maybe if there was a lending library of yarn, that I could borrow, store for a bit, dream about the projects I might make, and then return it when I realize that if I make that cowl I will buy N.E.W. Am I crazy?
I'm sure lots of folks here can give you great ideas on where to donate yarn but I wanted to tell you that your craft lending library idea is BRILLIANT and I hope when I am a gazallionaire (as I hope to be one day) I can open up the world's first Craft Lending Library and Wine Bar. We'll have big comfy couches and chairs, plenty of books, yarn, hooks and needles and a shop cat who will be one of those rare felines that loves everyone and sits everywhere. And I'll have a poolboy.
(What a difference a good night's sleep makes! No Kafkatalk!)
Posted by laurie at 05:24 AM | Comments (67)
April 28, 2010
Wednesday
Hello, Wednesday!
Are you watching DWTS? I never saw The Bachelor (but of course have seen Clean House a bazillion times) so I was glad Niecey got to stay. She's funny.
So, I may have to pause re-reading The Trial
Then I thought, "Oh, what do I know? It's not even quarter 'til five in the morning. This day hasn't even turned on for most people. I could still be a bug by day's end." We'll see how it turns out... everyone loves a mystery!
Kafka is weird and tangled and I enjoy him but maybe this one was way too close to home. I have him in my purse just in case. Maybe we'll hang out at lunch and spin conspiracy theories. Or maybe I'll catch up on my Entertainment Weekly instead.
So, when I was in the shower (where I do my best thinking) I was wondering why TV seems less scary/real to some folks than books. (I'm the exact opposite -- too much CSI or Dexter gives me nightmares and keeps me awake all night hearing imaginary scary noises.) (Even though I like those shows.) (Parenthetical, parenthetical.)
Do you think it's because books feel more intimate than TV? More persuasive? Do books make more of an impression because they take more time to get through? I read a study once that said your body burns more calories reading a book than watching TV. Maybe you get more wrapped up in a book, mentally and physically. Maybe I am way too curious about this subject and need to move on.
Here's another question: When it comes to entertainment are you a re-visitor or always a first-timer? I got a comment from a reader last week (I can't find the actual comment because it's been commentageddon around here lately with the book giveaways and stuff) but it said something like:
I never go back and re-read books or watch movies again, life is too short to waste time on something I've already read or seen when there is more out there to experience.
That is a whole new way of approaching the world, and I honestly had never thought of it, not with my beloved books and favorite movies. (Sure I'll happily never revisit many epochs of my fashion sense or 98.99999% of the stupid stuff I have done while dating) but never re-read a book? It almost made me sad! It's the exact opposite of my nature ... I want to hold on to things I've loved, they're comforting to me.
But it's an interesting take on life, the idea that re-visiting is wasting time you could spend doing something new. So -- what do you think? Do you think life is all about moving on to the next new thing? Is re-reading time wasted or time well-spent? (Obviously there is no right answer, it's all opinion and personal preference. I'm just curious about you.)
Maybe I am hopelessly antiquated, but I love the feeling of revisiting an old book or movie. I reach for my well-worn favorites a lot -- The Stand
I can't imagine my life without many happy years of The Sound of Music ahead! Then again, I can eat the same thing for lunch every day for a week. And I park my car in the same spot most days. And I still have books from the 9th grade. I am a creature of habit, definitely. The good part is I know every word to every song in The Sound of Music. The downside is maybe I do not embrace all changes as quickly as I'd like.
- - -
Best email I got all week:
From: Samantha D. Tuesday, April, 27, 2010 at 11:49:19message:
I don't know how to leave a comment but I wanted to say if you ever get a copy of the book "Men Who Want Women Who Knit" - well I'll take one of those!!! :)
That had me cracking up all day long.
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Best comment yesterday:
time4mercy wrote: And now for something completely different: on your recommendation, I ordered some Dr. Bronner's soap
It does! All the astrocrazy is completely free, actually I saw a great documentary once on the whole Dr. Bronner's family and it was FASCINATING. I'm pretty sure the documentary I saw was this one: Dr. Bronner's Magic Soapbox
I loved it because it reminded me that even when life is nuts and you're in a mental institution it is possible to escape and create something so smellgood and feelgood that it can clean both your hair and your floors. Amen to the promise of possibility! Or so says Fräulein Laürie.
Posted by laurie at 06:38 AM | Comments (183)
April 27, 2010
Breakfast with Kafka
Having finished up with The Count of Monte Cristo
The Trial
Like The Count of Monte Cristo, this book is the same one I bought when first assigned to read this story in a literature class. So I calculate that The Trial has been with me since my first year of college, and traveled from Mississippi to Tennessee to Florida and to California with me and seen me through one marriage and divorce and twenty different shades of blonde.
It even has notes from the first time I read it, which made me laugh out loud when I saw them:
I think I was trying to be smart and Existentialist, but my notes are like a mental patient's manifesto...
clean air stifles
normal life
duplicity murky
dehumanized
rhetoric!!!!!
Seriously ya'll.
And even though I would never have admitted it back then, I didn't really get Kafka when I first had to read The Trial and later The Metamorphosis
August 29, 1914 The end of one chapter a failure; another chapter, which began beautifully, I shall hardly -- or rather certainly not -- be able to continue as beautifully, while at the time, during the night, I should certainly have succeeded with it. But I must not forsake myself, I am entirely alone.
And:
September 1, 1914
In complete helplessness barely wrote two pages. I fell back a great deal today, though I slept well. ... My old apathy hasn't completely deserted me yet, as I can see, and my coldness of heart perhaps never. That I recoil from no ignominy can as well indicate hopelessness as give hope.
Dude, get thee to a romantic comedy, STAT!
No, what I love about Kafka is that even if I don't all the way get every aspect of his writing, if I let go of trying to be cerebral and analytical and stuff I can just feel his tension and stress from the words. You know this person feels imprisoned, you can feel the muddiness of it, you can sense the panic just below the surface at all times. It's weird but good.
So that's what I'm re-reading today. Let's see -- first Edmond Dantès, now Joseph K. Well, you don't exactly need to dig up Freud and buy a couch to see that I'm in a place. What's next? Plath? A history of the black plague? Maybe some lighthearted Edgar Allen Poe? Actually, I think my next read will be a thick stack of trashy tabloid magazines. For balance.
Speaking of balance, how does she manage with all those whiskers?
And traffic on the 101 was insane in the membrane, saw this on a big grey pickup truck under big grey skies:
I know that the driver probably hangs drywall, but for some reason I felt a little dirty after reading this. The drrrrty kind of dirty.
Posted by laurie at 08:50 AM | Comments (54)
April 26, 2010
Another book giveaway: Knits Men Want & Comfort Knitting and Crochet Afghans
Thanks everyone! Comments for the giveaway are closed now. Thank you to everyone who participated!
- - - -
Yes, another giveaway!
Edited: Apparently I was half asleep this morning and did not realize that the publisher of the cute book Knits Men Want has their own sweepstakes and I neglected to tell you about it. Whoops! So in addition to the book giveaway here today, I also want to make sure you see the Cringe Or Crush sweepstakes here.
Also, I was bummed about giving away my review copies of the books which should in itself be a review to how cute they are and how much I wanted to keep them, and then Leslie at Abrams books said she would send me a copy of my own which proves two things: 1) Complaining totally does pay off! And 2) Knitting book people are awesome.
So here are the books in today's give-away:
Although who am I kidding? Like I will be knitting a sweater for a guy any day soon. Hah. I asked my mom if she thought Dad would wear a hand-knit sweater and she laughed.
And there's this one:
Comfort Knitting and Crochet: Afghans
So one winner will get a copy of each book and I'll include a copy of my book, Home Is Where the Wine Is
Just post a comment to be entered. This giveaway will close sometime tonight. Good luck!
Edited to add: This is open to everyone on all of planet earth since I'm doing the shipping, I'll mail anywhere :) Well, anywhere on this planet. Let's keep it earth-based, folks. Those FedEx rates to Uranus are a killer.
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Oh, I finished my weekend with Edmond Dantès. After reading the book I watched the movie last night and it was kind of a letdown. It should have been called "A Movie Loosely Based On The Count of Monte Cristo." I kept thinking about those poor schmucks in 9th grade classrooms across the country who skipped reading the book this year and just watched the movie. Suckers!
Posted by laurie at 09:27 AM | Comments (645)
April 23, 2010
Win Debbie Macomber's newest book -- Hannah's List!
Edited to add: Sunday, 6:41 p.m. comments and giveaway are now closed, thanks so much to all who participated and I'll have winners tomorrow!
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You might think the best part of having this website is the unusually large amount of fans I have in prisons across America. While that is certainly awesome, I have to say the best perk is having publishers who want to send you free books! I love books and love giveaways and this one is so good. This week, Debbie Macomber's publicity folks sent me a review copy of Hannah's List and it's a beautiful big hardback book and like Madonna said... Papa don't preach, I'm keeping my baby. Luckily the publisher is offering all you Crazy Aunt Catlady readers a giveaway of their own with three winners!
GIVEAWAY DETAILS:
There is one Grand Prize winner who receives a copy of Hannah's List
Two additional winners will receive a copy of the book!
To enter, just post a comment, it doesn't have to be anything elaborate. Also, if you don't want your email address to visible on the comment, then enter something in the URL field. It will show instead of your email address, but I will still be able to email you through magic. You can just enter crazyauntpurl.com in the URL field if you want. If I wasn't such a techno-dunce I might be able to figure out how to change it in the code of this here website but last time I tried that. I broke comments for about a year. Whoops!
Edited to add: For those of you new to my comments section, your name shows up underneath your comment.
If you want to get more information about the book you can visit the book’s official website at www.hannahslist.com (isn't Debbie Macomber adorable? I think she is so darn cute) or you can read about Hannah's List
One last thing...
Since the fulfillment of this give away is being handled by the publisher, this prize is only open to participants with a United States mailing address (international readers can enter if they have a friend in the States who can accept their prizes by mail.) I am guessing a prison counts as a U.S. address, heh.
Have fun and good luck! This giveaway will be open for the weekend and/or until we max at at 1,000 comments or whatever breaks the server. One entry per person.
- - -
As you can see, La Soba is already enjoying my copy of this book as she basks by the fire:
Have a great weekend!!!
Posted by laurie at 09:26 AM | Comments (1000)
April 22, 2010
Thursday
Last night The Count of Monte Cristo
"What's the matter, father? You don't look well." "It's nothing; it will pass," said the old man; but his strength failed and he fell backward. "You need a glass of wine," said Edmond. "That will make you feel better. Where do you keep your wine?"
Oh hell yeah. I am so reincarnated from someone previously French. I, too, believe in the medicinal and healing properties of wine. And love and intrigue and carefully honed revenge fantasies.
Got a little reading in before work, too.
When I'm writing I try not to read anything contemporary because I'm paranoid about absorbing that author's voice even in the smallest detail. So I'm loving reading the very not-contemporary voice of Dumas (classics are good anyway, because imitating that style just doesn't happen in my brain). The writing is still deeply engaging and the subject matter is also timely for me. Yes, that's right, I too am imprisoned in the Château d'If. Yeah yeah mine is a little more metaphorical ... though it is pretty iffy! hah. Cracked myself up.
- - -
I've been knitting, though I'm still knitting for other people (I seem to be taking orders these days: Hey can you knit me some handwarmers? Hey, can you knit a hat for so-and-so?) and I just finished these colorful handwarmers for one of the gals in the office:
Cast on 40 stitches, I think I used a size 5 needle but normal humans who don't knit teflon-tight could use a size 4, then work in K4, P4 ribbing, finish the last inch with some seed stitch. Sew up the sides leaving a hole for the thumb. SO easy!
For these cozy handwarmers I used TLC essentials yarn in a variegated color called "fall leaves" and I love how the colors turned out! I know some people are yarnsnobby about acrylic but I often find exactly the perfect texture and color in a nice skein of good old-fashioned TLC or Red Heart. And it's very durable.
Happy customer.
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OH! I am officially giving you the heads up that tomorrow I am doing an awesome book giveaway content thingy and the prize is really good! So tune in. I will try to post it early and leave it up late enough for everyone to get a comment in.
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The weather has been cold and wintry lately, very unusual for April. The furballs enjoyed having the fireplace on and me all tangled up in the sofa with a fluffy blanket and a book last night. I love it when they follow me into whatever room I'm hanging out in and find their own spots to relax. My little four-legged roommates.
Posted by laurie at 08:06 AM | Comments (73)
April 20, 2010
Reading (or re-reading) the classics
Summer reading weather is almost here. I love spending a beautiful hot sunny summer day indoors, safely away from nature and curled up in manufactured indoor air with a good book and a cold adult beverage. Usually I go for contemporary fiction, cheese-laden self-help or biography. But this season I have a hankering to up my classic reading IQ and read (or re-read) a few pieces of classic literature. Or, where I am from, litterchure.
So, what are your top five favorite classic books? I'm making up my summer reading list. I'm thinking maybe some Dorothy Parker
And are there any classic authors you've never gotten around to reading but are embarrassed to admit it? For me it's a serious lack of Jane Austen
(More of my awesomely bad hair is here: Read My Hairstory.)
We had just moved from Louisiana to Columbia, Tennessee and I was full of rebellion and my own super coolness, so of course all I wanted to read were the books children my age were not supposed to read -- I started with a little E. M. Forster
Luckily, I had parents who encouraged my love of books and secretly hoped that no matter what I was reading perhaps if I kept my nose stuck in a book I would stop hiding boys in my closet (hah, good try, Dad.) So my mom would take me to Nashville every few months and we'd go to a big mall and spend hours in the bookstore. Thank goodness for the internet so angsty teens in small towns across America can now buy their gritty rebellious books online. And thank the Lord for my enlightened parents who let me read anything I wanted. They wouldn't let me listen to Prince records, mind you, but if it was a book and I could save up enough allowance to buy it it was all mine. I love this about them.
College was a buffet-- the bookstore on campus and the library were filled with crazy great stuff, the weird and fabulous Alain Robbe-Grillet,
So, I'd love to hear your Top 5 Classic Reads suggestions. Besides, eventually we're going to hit re-run season and my brain might enjoy being stimulated by something other than reality TV. Or it may go into shock. Or I may actually be a cockroach, who knows!
Cat angst.
Posted by laurie at 08:07 AM | Comments (421)
April 08, 2010
The Festival of Broken Things
Sure, I suspected it might be major when I barely -- just barely-- coasted into the mechanic station in the underground garage and turned off the ignition and heard my Jeep audibly gasp with mechanical dramatics. When the mechanic called me late in the day yesterday with the tense voice, using words like "drive train" and "differential" and "thousands" and "surprised you made it here without the transmission falling out on the 101" I sighed with my own audible dramatics. It's that time in my life when things break. It happens. And yet I am not hiding in the ladies room sipping from a flask. An accomplishment!
That was the scariest thing when my ex-husband unceremoniously dumped me, that worry about who would I turn to when I needed help? How would I do all this living alone, the money, the details, the backup ride to the subway? Who can pick you up from the dentist, who can listen when you need it? You figure it out though. It takes time. Work Jen saw me heading over to the garage in the afternoon to clean out my few belongings from my Jeep and she said, "How will you get home?" And she was genuinely worried about me (and lives nowhere near me, and knows I wouldn't ask her anyway though she is the sort of friend who would offer) but I knew I would figure something out. It's a skill I'm sort of proud of. I am the person you want to be near when a natural disaster strikes because I know, I KNOW, I can get us out and get us situated and get us drunk as skunks. I am resourceful, resilient and have a 20-pound handbag with all sorts of magic in it.
But secretly there is something about car trouble that renders me all belle-like and soft and needy and wanting someone else to be there. I have absolutely no safety net in life and most of the time I choose to feel challenged and independent about that whole scary no-safety-net thing. When my Jeep falls apart majestically (with actual metal falling from below) and all my other stuff is breaking and racking up expenses I start to get a little nervous, that's all. I guess. I go soft. Stupid car trouble.
By the way, comments are closed today because there are some subjects that no one, not even one with a full supply of independence and self-help books, wants more helpful advice about. For you perhaps that subject is your children, your weight, your hair, or maybe it's your love of the Kardashians. For me it's the subject of my Jeep and my weird relationship to car breakdown emotions.
It's a thing with me.
So I am Jeepless for now, for maybe weeks, who knows. Mass transportation I see you and raise you a token (hah) in appreciation. Well, anyway, I did say I wanted to walk more in April, yes?
- - -
As for the dead workstation that has all my project files and everything set up just-so-the-way-I-like-it, well, it was wheeled off yesterday by the IT Magic Man and I still have faith in him, we'll see what verdict he returns. Here's hoping PCs don't have a drive train. Don't worry, I didn't propose to him. I hear some women are desperate for children, I seem to be desperate for a man who can fix stuff. I'd love to trade my powers of mass breakage for the power to fix something.
I did back up all my data of course, because I know how I am with technology. But last week my backup drive stopped working. It just happened a few days ago so I haven't had time to buy a new one and now have no files and no backup. Oh and no car. (And while we are at it no clean socks.) So Magic IT Man took pity on me and is looking at my backup drive today, too. Fingers crossed that by end of day we won't be tipping out a forty to my ol' homie the PC.
- - -
Last night after accepting that I was Jeepless and knight-in-shining-armnorless, I took the subway home to the Valley and walked from the metro to the bus and then got off at the stop by the grocery store and bought as much wine as I could safely carry home. You would be surprised how much I can carry. I like solving my problems with a glass of cabernet, a bag of chips and some dumb TV. The Tivo seems operational. Life is good.
I'm glad my engine didn't fall out on the 101. I'm pleased that I can figure out how to get home and back with no car. I'm glad we have someone here at work so capable that I truly do have hope about my PC. And my backup. I'm glad they have a mechanic in the parking garage here so that I don't have to get my Jeep pulled out of the garage by a chain tow then onto a waiting flatbed in the middle of downtown then 40 miles to my other mechanic who may or may not be back in the pokey. I'm really glad I moved because now I can actually walk to a grocery store and honestly, that's the only place I go other than work, so as long as my legs keep working we're in business at Chez Merlot Meow Mix.
Now that I have listed all the happy glad bits and all, and said kumbaya and walked in a circle and burned sage and counted blessings and tried not to touch things I want to keep working, like my camera and my netbook, and also honestly copped to my dumb emotional weakness that comes with car trouble, well... Universe, can you move on to torturing some other person with breakitis? And I know just the person! May I suggest my Evil Arch Nemesis? I'm just saying is all.
But this is still working:
Cat cuteness. Pic taken with my cellphone as I am slightly afraid to touch my new awesome camera for obvious reasons.
Posted by laurie at 07:01 AM
April 07, 2010
The good, the bad, the ugly and expensive. But then the whatever.
So! The good news is they got my workstation running for just long enough to make me insanely happy, thinking I was past the cloud of anti-tech vibes I'm under right now, and then once I was lulled into that false sense of security it died again. And may never be recovered, we do not know. That is actually bad news, but the good news is the tech they have assigned to my situation is the world's best and is magic and can fix all sorts of things. Including maybe I will not have to call upon lovely reader Wendy's tech friend she put me in touch with to fix my external backup since A) I will be working until midnight trying to catch up on all my projects since I am working on an unfamiliar computer now with none of my original files and do not even have the energy to open my door when I get home, even for a fix-it man and 2) the magic IT guy at work said he would look at it for me. Maybe out of pity, or maybe because I promised I would stop humping his leg.
Also, as my anti-tech vibe continues, I just went down to the ATM to get cash and it was out of order. And my car is making a suddenly new and expensive noise which started about ten minutes before I pulled into the garage so the mechanics there who keep selling me radiators are looking at my Jeep. That was the bad news, in case you were wondering. Also, the ugly and expensive, most likely.
But whatever. These things they happen. I am glad really, just get all the breaking out of the way at one time. (Ok, I'm not "glad" but I can't fix any of this myself and the universe is mysterious and this is just how my life rolls so I now roll with it instead of crying in a corner eating my hair.)
Speaking of eating thanks for all the funny and interesting comments about chicken nugget lovin' kids yesterday. I have lots of friends my age who have kids (oh who are we kidding, I am about the only one I know with no children) and I am endlessly fascinated by how well they all navigate the tricky waters of parenting. I'm not a parent, but I know the avalanche of unsolicited advice I get on even the smallest things, like cat litter or my aversion to breakfast, so I can't imagine what parents today go through fielding advice, finger-wagging and the information overload bombarded at all of us on every topic. It was really entertaining to me to hear everyone's picky eater stories and eats-everything stories and all in between.
I can certainly be picky in my own right. I don't love mushrooms, I prefer vegetables to fruit, I need my steaks cooked well done. We all have our stuff. Reader Dee pointed out that McDonald's didn't introduce the nugget until the '80s (and our small town didn't even have a McDonald's) so I think that explains why nugget-only palates mystify me since I wasn't exposed to it myself very early on. I was never a kid who got to be picky about food, we didn't have that kind of set-up in our house, but I was insane about other stuff, like I had to carry Sam (my stuffed animal) everywhere and sleep with him every night or the world would END. END, I tell you. I was a weird kid anyway, always writing my little stories in my little notebooks and having imaginary friends and being secretive and wanting to be called a different name. Usually plant names -- Jasmine, Clover, etc. All our battles at the dinner table revolved around someone hollering at me to get my nose out of that book and eat already.
And I guess I am an equally weird adult because it doesn't surprise me at all when I have a week or two where everything I touch breaks -- except the big old blocky downstairs TV which I even hugged last night and still it soldiers ever onward.
Posted by laurie at 10:31 AM | Comments (68)
April 06, 2010
Ah, the best intentions
I had every intention today of showing you pictures of traffic and glamour shots of Frankie and maybe some other cats wearing fur like runway models and yet today I am having computer issues, again, and there will be no pictures.
In the past eight days I have broken an external hard drive which may or may not ever be fixable and houses all my photos and assorted stuffage, I have broken a USB thumb drive (really broken, like in half) and now a whole PC. My magical powers of breaking stuff are in full form! Later tonight I plan to do a laying on of my own hands upon the huge old boxy TV in my living room that refuses to die so it can be replaced by one of those sleek new flat things. Who knows. I could maybe blow the power grid later today. If you live in L.A. and the lights go out, I'm just saying, maybe soon I'll get a new TV.
Anyway! In the meantime let us talk about TeeVee, my friend, my current deepest relationship, my one gadget that still works. First there is the untimely leaving of Didi from American Idol, she has such a pretty voice. Why her and not the interchangeable tweeny guys? And Fox, can you please get with the program and understand that an hour has only 60 minutes and so when you go over that those of us who Tivo your shows miss the very end? And frankly not all of us want to clip our next programs by three minutes because you are too dumb to understand how to plan six minutes of programming to fit inside a 60-minute slot. Get the memo!
Next, Dancing With The Stars. Yes, I watch. Judge silently to yourself. On the first night when Pam Anderson did the chacha (or whatever that was) it was so sleazy I think my TV got herpes. However she has really surprised me these last two times, so why was she in the bottom two and not Buzz? Mystery. Also I was surprised by both how good and how flat-out gorgeous Erin Andrews is. The new co-host also takes Awkward to new heights which is kind of funny.
Did anyone start watching Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution? I Tivoed it out of curiosity and got kind of sucked in. Who knew the U.S. schools had such weird food guidelines? Two breads per meal? I did know that whole thing about ketchup counting as a vegetable and all but I think I don't pay much attention to this sort of stuff since I don't have kids. And maybe it's because I don't have kids but I have never really understood chicken nugget syndrome, something painfully illustrated in this show. I have friends around my age and they have small children who will eat nothing but chicken nuggets and I hear this from all sorts of people, "That's all my kid will eat!" and I just don't get it. Kids aren't born genetically craving chicken nuggets. They eat what you feed them. Or am I completely insane and in the past 20 years children have mutated and now spring forth fully-formed into chicken nugget cravers?
I don't think I ever saw or heard of a nugget until I was a teenager. Sure, I ate fried chicken growing up, I'm Southern, but we didn't have this whole picky eater nugget thing going on. The luxury of pitching a hissy about food wasn't normal or tolerated. You ate what was served or you didn't eat but it wasn't a big deal. I know parenting has changed and all that, and hey you should feed your kid whatever you want, it's not my place to judge. So I'm not taking some moral waterloo stance here, I'm just very curious about it. When I travel I see kids all over the world eating real food like the grownups do. So is it just American kids who have chicken nugget syndrome? I've always wanted to know. It's very interesting to me.
How did this become a nugget thing? And please don't send me hate mail, I'm not judging parenting/mothering/child-rearing or that time you stalked your ex on Facebook. We all know I am crackass addicted to fast food so it's not like I'm going to point a finger, but my addiction was entirely self-inflicted. Merely curious about the nugget situation. Back to TeeVee!
Finally, I still watch and love Castle. Nathan Fillion is so cute and I love the chemistry with Castle and Beckett and I am so glad that the network didn't cancel that show.
Well, back to Tuesday and my superpowers of breaking technology. Who knows what havoc I can unleash! I better not touch the Tivo, though. I can lose data and backups and whole computers but losing Tivo would be a tragedy far greater than calling ketchup a vegetable.
Posted by laurie at 09:55 AM | Comments (167)
April 05, 2010
The return of the Evil Arch Nemesis!
It's been quite some time since I had an Evil Arch Nemesis, probably over a year. I prefer being my own worst enemy, it seems, or perhaps I am boring and forgetful about enemies. I did have an Evil Enemy about a year or so ago but the hateful disliking was mostly on her part and I sort of forgot all about it until I saw her one day walking on a sidewalk in downtown and I smiled and said hey and she brushed past me with an icy chill.
I thought, "That was weird! She must not have seen me!" and then I remembered we are Sworn Enemies For Life or Longer and she was still carrying that grudge even though I had long forgotten about her. It made me laugh.
This time, though, I have a real ambitious Evil Arch Nemesis (and of course it's a she, why are my adversaries always cranky, panties-in-a-bunch women?) and she will one day make a fabulous fictional character, the foe to our heroine's main character.
It's good to get an Evil Arch Nemesis every now and again. It provides endless entertainment during happy hour with the girls and it brings out my more ebullient list of adjectives.
Now I am fully aware that there is a whole faction of the population who are as we speak stepping upon a soapbox filled with moral suds and getting elevated enough to climb up on top of a high, high horse to inform me that there should be no enemies, no grudges, no smack talking over happy hour. Those folks say it's always best to turn the other cheek, and I know that is absolutely the right choice for so many people.
However, I am from a part of the country where people are still re-enacting the Civil war and they plan to keep on re-enacting until it ends the way THEY want it to end. Talk about your elongated revenge fantasy. They put on homemade uniforms, carry real muskets and set up whole battlefield kitchens with corn pone and whiskey or something like that.
What I am saying here is that I am not from people who turn the other cheek. I am from the sort of stock that goes out of their way to dramatize an event and re-tell it for centuries to come and it includes special clothes for goodness sakes.
The very best part about having an Evil Arch Nemesis is that it brings out your creativity, largely in the realm of the Revenge Fantasy. I learned a lot from my expensive and drawn-out divorce and one of those lessons was to embrace the Revenge Fantasy. It's perfectly healthy and probably better for you than acting out in real life, unless you like incarceration, which I do not.
When you're deep in the midst of creating a revenge fantasy you're concentrating on every detail -- what you're wearing, what your hair looks like, which shoes go with your perfect-self-outfit, where you cross paths with Sworn Evil Enemy, what the other person says, what you say -- rewind, say it again, this time zingier! and so on.
It's impossible to feel sad or depressed or defeated or deflated or frustrated or hopeless when you are deep in a revenge fantasy. And that is a good thing! I know I personally always feel better about life after I spend an hour in crawling traffic having a very detailed revenge fantasy in which my sworn evil enemy is left in the dust and I am living in a pied-Ã -terre in Paris. In the end I am always wearing something fantastic and the nasty enemy is sour-faced and wearing bad shoes and fades out pitifully and sometimes there is George Clooney asking me to dinner. Not sure how he sneaks in there.
And what would life be anyway if you didn't have someone pop into your experience every now and then to crystallize so purely all the things you yourself never want to be? My Evil Arch Nemesis is all the stuff I definitely don't want to be in my life. So I like to see my Evil Arch Nemesis for what it is, something irritating that I can use to tell a funny story about and hopefully vanquish with George on my arm. And like all my sworn enemies she will one day be forgotten and truly, that is the very best revenge of all.
Posted by laurie at 07:00 AM | Comments (100)
April 02, 2010
Book Giveaway: Wendy Johnson's Toe-Up Socks for Everybody!
UPDATED TO SAY: Ok, today's book giveaway just closed -- I think you set a new record in comments! I'll try to figure out the form thing next week so we can do something where you don't have to comment. Or maybe not as I love reading what you have to say and also I am lazy with the technology (and with the laundry). By the way, I am almost convinced from your comments that I am not the only one who has had a yarn room all these years but been too ashamed to admit it... and I thank you for helping me with my weird punctuation issue (in the interview below) as I feel rather big brained now having been told I had it right all along. Which is sort of rare for me, High Mistress of Comma Splices.
Our winners were reader "threadbndr" (real name still to be determined) and a reader from Poland!
Congrats and have a great holiday weekend, everyone! Also there is another sock book giveaway coming in a few weeks and several knit books, a crochet book and a great fiction giveaway in mid-April so stay tuned. Freeness abounds!
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Here is the the thing about Wendy Johnson. She is good people. I am lucky enough to get review copies of all kinds of books from publishers (fiction, nonfiction, knitting, crochet, the works) and I am more than happy to promote them and do a giveaway because I love contributing in any small way to an author's success.
But Wendy is something special, and I'm the one who asked her publicist for books to give away because I know you rabid sock knitters out there will love this book and because Wendy is the real deal. She's smart, she's a knitting genius, and she's no bullshit. I have a lot of respect for her and also I think Bob sits on my keyboard at night hoping his furry butt will transmit a love letter to her cat Lucy who is far too beautiful for his himbo cat self.
Wendy Johnson is the author of WendyKnits (the blog) and Wendy Knits
Her second book, Socks from the Toe Up: Essential Techniques and Patterns from Wendy Knits
And today I'll be giving away two copies of Toe-Up Socks for Every Body: Adventurous Lace, Cables, and Colorwork from Wendy KnitsJust post a comment (I know, I know, but it's so easy!) between now and (updated to be 6 p.m.) 6 p.m. Pacific time and you'll be eligible to win.
Wendy and I did a little chatting this week, and I got some of my burning questions answered!
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Me: Hello! Please please explain the sock secret to me. I know knitters who are addicted to them and knit exclusively socks and yet with me the creeping contagion of sock obsession never caught on. What is it about sock knitting that draws you in?
Wendy: I actually resisted sock knitting for years because I am a creature who resists new things. Passionately. But I was sucked into it when the first self-striping sock yarns appeared on the market. Now I'm hooked. I love that you can whip 'em out quickly and have a finished product in short order. I love the challenge of designing in a small space. And I love that you can complete a project with just a skein or two of yarn.
Me:When you sit down to write a book do you ever have panic moments that you won't make the deadline?
Wendy: Every minute of every day. It's a wonder I can sleep at night. (Well, I don't sleep at night. Wait, I think I am on to something here . . . )
Me: Let's say you're at a party and someone you don't know asks you what you do. (Or maybe that is just an L.A. thing, but out here it's the first question anyone asks.) Do you tell folks you're an author, an elite knitting professional, or do you talk about your day job as your profession?
Wendy: It depends on the situation and the attendees. I usually respond "I'm a Washington bureaucrat and an author." Sometimes when I'm in a particularly smart-ass mood I say "I'm a mild-mannered civil servant by day and a knitting superhero by night."
Maybe this is why people shy away from me at parties.
Me: When you and I last chatted, you mentioned you have a yarn room. When you told me that -- "I have a yarn room..." -- it was a lightbulb moment for me. I have a yarn room, too, yet I have felt shamed and a little embarrassed by this, so I still call it my "home office" or even "guest room" though no one could sleep in there because of all the yarn. At what point did you embrace your stash as the your tools of the trade and go from "I have a spare room..." to "I have a yarn room..."? (I know the question mark should go inside the quotes yet it looked weird to me. Grammar conundrum.)
Wendy: Ah, the yarn room. When I first moved into my condo (in 1994!) it was the room where I threw everything that had no other place. Then I got a bed for it and it became a guestroom. Then I collected 164 pairs of cowboy boots (don't ask), had shelves built along the walls for them, and it became the boot room.
Then I learned about the concept of stashing yarn. I used to buy my yarn one project at a time, pre-internet. When I started reading about stashing yarn in knitting groups online, I started my yarn collection, I started getting rid of my boot collection. Now the room is filled with yarn and the boots have all gone to the Salvation Army. And I openly refer to the room as my stash room. Honored guests are allowed to stay in my stash room, but I need three days' notice to clear the yarn off the bed. And they have to sign a non-disclosure agreement.
Me: So... what types of yarn do you gravitate toward in stash mode? Do you find you buy mostly sock yarn, mostly cotton, wool, variegated?
Wendy: I have eleventy-billion tons of sock yarn, mostly 100% wool, a few sweaters worth of Shetland wool, and perhaps one billion tons of laceweights in a variety of wool, silk and cashmere. I am generally not a fan of cotton so I don't have a lot of that. But I love other natural fibers, so I've got wool, silk, cashmere, bison, and even a bit of qivuit. The only acrylic allowed in there is in blends with natural fibers.
Me: Do people at your job know that you are a World Famous Bestselling Author Knitter?
Wendy: A couple of them do. But mostly I don't talk about it at The Day Job.
Me: Do you wax and wane with knitting, sometimes going for a while without a project, or are you always knitting something?
Wendy: I am always always always knitting something. I knit every day, unless I am deathly ill with the flu or unconscious or something. If I am nearing the end of a project and don't have another project lined up I suffer End of Project Anxiety until I figure out what's going on the needles next.
Me: I adore your blog, WendyKnits, and your kitty pi was the first successful item I ever made in the round. It was also the first time I used double-pointed needled and first time I felted anything and honestly, I have you to thank for my love of all three of those things! Were you surprised by how incredibly famous (and necessary) the kitty pi has become in the knitting world?
Wendy: I never would have dreamed it! It was just something I winkled together for my own sweet Lucy during a phase when I was experimenting with felting. I love seeing all the photos on Ravelry of kitties the world over enjoying their kitty pis! And I always grant permission for people to make them and sell them in aid of animal charities. A few years ago Petfinder contacted me about the kitty pi and we put together a project where a bunch of us knitted them and sent them to Petfinder, who in turn gave them away to people who adopted older cats during one of their "Adopt an Older Pet" drives. Isn't that cool?
[ By the way, everyone, here is a link to the Kitty Pi recipe!]
Me: That just makes me a little misty-eyes! (It's my built in crazy cat lady alert system.) (I am the crazy cat lady, by the way.) So, when are you coming to Los Angeles to visit?
Wendy: When someone invites me and pays my way. Yeah, I'm cheap like that.
Do you think Lucy is playing hard to get with Bob? He's just a domestic shorthair, you know, his ego is already fragile...
Lucy sez: "Is Bob not getting my emails? I thought he was ignoring me!"
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Post your comment to be entered in the drawing. Good luck to all of you!
And thank you to Wendy who gave the world (and me) the kitty pi which in turn gave my beloved little Roy so much happiness and kept him warm when he was sick. It's fairly rare that I am effusive and fawning over anyone other than Dallas Raines, but Wendy inspires me and makes me want to be a better knitter and a better technical writer. Her descriptions of technique make me feel more excited about knitting rather than confused or intimidated. I hope her books find their way to your collection!
Posted by laurie at 09:42 AM | Comments (665)
April 01, 2010
Hello, April, my old friend, I've come to talk to you again....
I love that at least one of my monthly check-ins is on a day devoted to fools and pranks.
Recap: At the first of the year I made some resolutions, and I decided that I would check in with myself at the first of each month to see where I am with my two 2010 goals. My hope was that it would keep me focused and motivated for the year knowing I'd have to check in with myself every month. Come September we'll see if my monthly check in posts are "Yeah, OK, don't talk to me." You never know!
Also, one of my goals was initially described (by me) as "The Year of Yes" which is extraordinarily cheesy even for me, La Reina Quesadilla. But the more I think about it, my two goals work together and the first ("Get Healthy") is really about action steps and the other ("Cheesy Yes Year") is about attitude. So here's how I did in March.
Goal #1: Get Healthy (Actions)
Things are going pretty well. Thanks to my discovery of a deep love for roasted vegetables, I have eaten more fresh vegetables in the past three months than I have in years. I love roasting stuff! I would probably roast you if you stood still long enough in my kitchen. And if I could cut you into tiny pieces.
My action-related objectives for March were to (1) continue cooking all my meals and (2) try four new recipes. And also to go for a walk every day in the month.
I tend to get into food ruts -- both healthy ones and unhealthy ones -- and to shake things up I decided that in March I would try some new recipes. I am not that accomplished in the kitchen but I am getting incrementally better because I keep trying (and also because I disabled the smoke alarm nearest the stove.) I do most of my cooking on the weekends, so that's when I tried my new recipes. The first new recipe I tried was Sole Meuniere, which looked so tasty when the Barefoot Contessa made it. The only alteration I made to her recipe was to substitute a mixture of brown rice flour and corn flour in place of the wheat flour.
My first attempt at Sole Meuniere was not great (but not because of my little substitution). I cooked the sole on too high a heat and used too much lemon juice. The second attempt was MUCH better, I used a slightly lower heat and added less lemon juice. I have to say, though, the fish in papillote method is still the most foolproof way for me to cook seafood. Plus I cannot sing the praises of parchment paper enough as there is no messy fish pan to clean up! I am no Suzie Homemaker, it seems.
The second new recipe I made was Kale Chips. If you have been reading this here website for any amount of time you know I am always trying to sneak kale into stuff to make me feel healthy. I will not however be sneaking them into chips again. I stand by my initial review that this is a tastebud issue, and I think some of you will like them. Me, eh, not so much.
The other two recipes I made were Rachael Ray's Jacques Pepin style potatoes and while this may be stretching the definition of "new recipe" I did roast some orange cauliflower which was the first time I had ever bought orange cauliflower. It tasted exactly like regular white cauliflower. Yup.
As for walking, I went for a walk on 18 out of 31 days in March. Which brings me directly to resolution #2...
Goal #2: Year of Yes (better described as "Give myself an attitude adjustment.")
Usually when I set a health goal like "lose X pounds" or "walk every day this month" I will set out upon the goal initially with great gusto and energy until the one day when I don't meet the goal and then I just use that single momentary lapse as an excuse to give up. "I didn't walk today, all is lost! I wasn't perfect! Forget it, I'll start again next month!"
Not my best quality, really.
Well, I have long since given up a weight/pound goal because it makes me INSANE and it does more harm with my head than good. But I set the walk-every-day goal on purpose, both to get myself walking more and to get over my stupid thinking that if I miss one single walk I have failed. Overall health is not something that can be failed in one day! It's the cumulative effort that matters. (By the way I am lecturing to myself here, not to you. You are already smart enough to know all this.)
So, how did my goal go? In February I walked four days out of 28. But in March, after making my mini-goal, I walked 18 out of 31 days.
Old thinking: Failure, I was not perfect, I suck!
New thinking: 18 out of 31 days is AWESOME! A success! Especially since I had a horrible stomach flu at the beginning of the month and could hardly walk up my own stairs. So, yay me!
Look, I'll be honest. It's not as easy as flipping a brain switch -- that is why I deliberately made this resolution to begin with and why I purposely set a 31-day goal in March. I wanted to practice changing from old thinking to new thinking. Yes, I missed a few days. The true success was that even after missing a day I got up the next day and went for a walk anyway, even though I had ruined my shot at perfection. That's the whole point of my Yes Year, progress not perfection.
I have to remind myself of it over and over and I hope that if I keep doing this stuff I will eventually get better at it, just like cooking.
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So that was March and already it's April, 2010. For April my actiony goals are to keep up the walking, keep cooking my own meals and to relax into life a little more. (And keep cleaning my house. Seriously.) I want to try three or four new recipes again in April. Obviously my definition of "recipe" is not very complicated, but I like challenging myself to try new things. I've been off fast food now for three whole months and I think it was like kicking heroin. I could eat fast food for every meal (and in the past I have) and so kicking that habit was hard and not very fun for the first two and a half months. It's only recently that I don't drive past a McDonald's and salivate like one of Pavlov's pets.
Exercise is still not my idea of entertainment but I like walking, it's easy and you don't have to be particularly athletic to do it, so I want to continue it daily and not quit just because I miss a day. So I am re-upping my "walk once a day" goal.
In general I wouldn't say March was my easiest month, I had many days where I wanted to just eat away all my problems, a strategy which has never actually worked in the past and yet still I want to do it. When I quit smoking I started eating as a replacement for smoking and now I realize I have spent a lot of my life avoiding icky spaces by filling my time with an activity -- smoking, eating, drinking, shopping, knitting, whatever. The trick perhaps is to pick an activity that doesn't incur waves of self-loathing. I try to make good choices, sometimes I don't, but I certainly am not going to give up. But check back with me in September, hah hah.
As for my attitude I just want to relax. Laugh instead of taking things personally. Be softer to myself and to others. Suppress urge to staple people in the forehead. The usual stuff.
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Finally, to everyone who is rolling their eyes and wishing I would stop talking about this because you don't want a reminder that it's already muthafreaking April and you haven't done whatever thing it was you had planned to do earlier or because you're in a different place ... listen, I get it. For me that was ALL of 2009. I remember one time late last fall when Corey was telling me how excited she was for working out at lunchtime and I wanted to inform her I was planning to go home and take a bath made of melted Snickers bars and marshmallow cream. (I managed to stay quiet and just be happy for her. But that bath sounded real good.)
I think maybe it's OK not to be "in the right place" just this minute. The best part about life is that every passing moment is another chance to turn it all around. You know?
I learned that from quitting smoking again and again and again until one day I really did quit (until I turn 60, of course, at which time I will re-start smoking and probably wear something scandalous like leopard print leggings.) There is always the chance to turn it around. I know if I keep trying with my health actions and my thinking, I will get the metaphorical bus out of the ditch. Of course, if I sit in the bus complaining about being in the ditch I will probably stay there a really long time. I got tired of being in the ditch complaining so here I am making roasted Brussels sprouts and freaking KALE CHIPS and trying to really let icky things go instead of holding them tight and just shrug instead of being defensive, lean into life instead of hiding from it.
Every day, every minute is a new fresh start. I have that on a post-it note in my bathroom. Because I really am the Queen of Cheese. La Reina Quesadilla. That's me.
Posted by laurie at 12:18 AM | Comments (105)
March 31, 2010
Wowza!
Thanks so much to everyone who participated today in the book give-away! And seriously good vibes to the author, Adrienne Martini, who I hope has a big fat bestseller on her hands with Sweater Quest: My Year of Knitting Dangerously
So! We have two winners, I've alerted both by email and will update you with their first names when they get back to me. I even already packaged the books (gasp!) to be sent out tomorrow. I know in the past I have sucked at mailing in a timely fashion and am determined to be MUCH better.
I haven't done a book give-away in a long while and I am so happy that ya'll are into it because I have a whole line up of cool knitting book giveaways coming up!
The next one is with one of my favorite knitters ever but that's all I'll say for now, keeping you on your toes and all. And I'll be throwing in signed copies of my books for each one of these freebie fests. I LOVE giving stuff away and now that I have my box o' Wine books (hah) I can do a bunch of these little impromptu sweepstakes. I'm sorry I am so lame and disorganized that I make you post a comment but it's faster than setting up a form and I am nothing if not lazy and technophobic. And honestly no flattery is required, you can just post Hey to your mutha or whatever floats your boat, and I do read all the comments because you are my social life. Seriously. That's not sad is it?
But the point here is that there will be loads of opportunities to win free books in the coming weeks so do not despair if you didn't win this time. There is always tomorrow as Scarlett would say....
You all just had me cracking up with your posts. I am so glad the comments are back and knock on wood have only broken once in the past few months. So, in reply: I apologize for those I have gotten addicted to the show "Hoarders," though I am secretly pleased to have you share my addiction. The quilt that Soba was sprawled across is about fourteen years old, I bought it here in L.A. and I love it so much I am always stitching up the frayed bits hoping to make it last forever. Yes, I definitely do think the camera adds 45 pounds even for little kitties. Oh, the camera I bought was this Canon PowerShot
Recently my mom and I were having a conversation and I said, "Do you think Dallas Raines knows I take pictures of him on my TV and call him Dapper Dallas?"
"I'm sure he has the restraining order up on his mantelpiece," she said.
"Well it's not like I'm going to leave my house and go stalk him or something," I said. "That would require me to leave my home and talk to people. I won't even go to Home Depot because it's too much effort."
"I'm sure he'd be relieved to hear you're too weird to leave your house," she said.
"Do you think Al Gore is jealous?"
And so on and so forth...
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Thanks again, everyone!
Posted by laurie at 05:06 PM | Comments (27)
March 25, 2010
FINALLY
A must-needed must-have day off, it was worth it to burn a vacation day for mental health. Seriously. Before long they were going to be stringing that yellow crime-scene tape around my desk.
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Me: I'm taking Friday off!
Work Jen: What are you doing?
Me: I'm going to get my life together.
Work Jen: In one day?
Me: What? Does that seem too ambitious?
Work Jen: Well, that depends on how screwed up your life is.
(pause)
(pause)
(pause)
Me: Well, then, I'm going to vacuum.
Work Jen: That sounds very achievable!
- - -
And so it is. Happy weekend. May your tumbleweeds cower in fear of your vacuum.
Posted by laurie at 10:52 PM | Comments (59)
March 24, 2010
Of yarn and spuds
When I am feeling mildly slumpy, or schlumpy, I try to surround myself with things I like that make me happy and at the top of my list are yarn and potatoes.
This yarn is one of my all-time favorites:
It's a big pile of Patons Soy Wool Stripes in geranium. I'm knitting it on size 11 needles because eventually I plan to felt it down into a laptop case. Still to be determined is whether or not I will unearth my sewing machine from the tragically-as-yet-unpacked pile of stuff in my office and add a lining and a zipper or will I fake it with a flap and velcro... who knows! Life is mysterious and unpredictable that way. The very best thing about this yarn (aside from its colors, which are lovely) is that it felts up like a dream.
In fact, if you are a SupaTight knitter like some people we know your SWS may start felting even as you knit! If it weren't so feltable I would think this would make a beautiful sweater. I'm not much of a handwasher so I like my sweaters unfeltable and machine washable, but even as I have been knitting up this rectangle I keep thinking I'd love a sweater that looks just like this.
Most of the knitting I have done in the past year has been for other people: babies, mostly, and squares for blankets for babies. Just yesterday I finished the squares I had to do for the group blanket one of the ladies at work is putting together and I have finished what I think is my last baby project for a while so I'm going to be selfish, stingy, yarn-hoardery and just knit a few things now for me, me, me. Starting with this easy little laptop case and then I want to knit myself a pair of gloves (which I am very excited about). AlterKnits Felt
- - -
Last night I went home a bit early so I could make myself a proper dinner and go to bed early and get myself out of that day. I love potatoes with a fiery passion. There is something so comforting and so relaxing and soothing about eating a potato. I guess I feel about the spud the way some folks feel about chocolate or crack cocaine or whatever your drug of choice is. For me, comfort food is and will always be the potato. I love them shredded, baked, boiled, fried, sauteed, oven-roasted, smashed, mashed, chopped or whole. I like all the varieties, too, waxy reds and creamy golds and starchy Russets.
The recipe I made last night was Rachael Ray's Jacques Pepin style potatoes. I used very small yellow fingerling potatoes and I skipped the parsley. I forgot to take a picture of it in the pan, but here are some leftovers in a dish:
Served with a little fillet of fish and some roasted cauliflower and it was a very satisfying meal. I'm counting this as one of my four new recipes this month even though it isn't hard, it was a new recipe and it turned out great. Cooking the potatoes in the broth really adds flavor, and then you have butter and Parmesan to top it off and make it just perfect.
A good antidote to slumpy!
Posted by laurie at 10:17 AM | Comments (72)
March 23, 2010
The mid-March slump
All those statistics about New Year's Resolutions say that people begin to waver in their resolve by the first few weeks of February. I tend to last a little longer out of pure stubbornness and determination but by Mid-March I usually find myself here, slumping, wondering how bad it would be really to just give up and be fat and grumpy for the rest of my life. Not so bad, surely?
I'm certainly not in the depressive maudlin funk of a few years ago, a funk I told no one about (except the poor recipients of my late night phone calls, Jen and Lark) because in general no one wants to hear about your funk-related garbage. I discovered the hard way during my divorce that folks have this Pavlovian response to whining, in which they 1) tell you it could be worse thereby invalidating your feelings and making you want to eat their head off or 2) tell you to buck up little camper, which makes you immediately feel the need to defend your unhappiness and also hit them in the head with your handbag. And by "you" I mean "me." So I try to keep a lid on it most of the time. It never solves anything anyway.
Life is just like that though, ups and downs. Or at least mine is. I don't trust these people who seem to stay on a perpetual cheer bender all the time, never getting frustrated or upset or having any emotion other than chipperness. It seems plastic and suspicious, like the fixed smile of a Cabbage Patch kid. I'm more volcanic, with my exuberant good moments and dramatic hissyfits. I love that about Southern women in general, there's a kind of emotional navigation of life that's expressive and full of gestures.
When I get like this I try to find things I like and load up on them: potatoes, in any format. Carla Bruni CDs. Yarn. Funny conversations with my friends. Good movies. Cats-- this morning Bob even sat on my lap for a whole 60 seconds, a world record. Coffee with cream. Life is too short to give up the cream in my coffee! Just listing things out like this makes me lighten up a little bit. The sheer force of listing in itself is a good-feeling activity.
I also need to clean my apartment top to bottom, a much-needed and much-overdue activity. As the Dalai Lama says, the first step toward meditation is to clean your room. I've been working long hours on multiple projects and my house has become a pit of tumbleweeds and piles of unopened mail and socks in weird places. When my space is messy I feel messy inside. Do you ever get like that?
There's no action item, slumps are like that. The best you can do (I think) is to focus on a few things that are pleasant and just ignore the other stuff. Or of course you can go whole hog and really get into the funk but I am saving that for my ladycrisis which I plan to have in a few years. I can't wait! It will be so fun. I may even do the one thing everyone has always warned me about -- dye my hair a shade of red that does not occur in nature. So for now there is no need to pull a full Blanche Dubois. I'm just going to make some lists and then clean my house.
Posted by laurie at 10:47 AM | Comments (103)
March 22, 2010
That was fun!
The Knitter's Studio in Los Angeles.
Inside the Knitter's Studio with Sara and the beautiful yarn.
Rachael and some of the group.
This just cracked us right up!
Me & Rachael.
As I was leaving I noticed that a few doors down from the knitting shop there's a store called Chateau Marmutt. TOO FUNNY.
Thank you so much to everyone who braved the traffic on marathon day and came out to the Knitter's Studio. It was a lovely afternoon!
Posted by laurie at 12:45 PM | Comments (17)
March 18, 2010
Their favorite child
My parents have a favorite, he is covered in fur.
Posted by laurie at 09:35 AM | Comments (48)
March 17, 2010
The luck of the eye-rish
Ever have one of those weeks where you wake up each morning already feeling behind for the day? That's my week. And my shirt is blue, not green because I got dressed in the dark and fugue of my early morning brain and so I am celebrating St. Paddy's day in blue, the cousin of green. I'm not sure if I'll have much time to write this week, so I'll just skip to the important stuff:
1) The weather is really warm and summerlike and I realize I am having pre-traumatic stress disorder thinking of switching from winter's forgiving layers to summer clothes. Also, my legs are so white they are now made of marshmallows and mayo and I fear I may blind people if I try to wear a skirt.
2) Which brings me to self-tanner. Do you have a brand you use and like and can recommend? I have tried the Clarins stuff before which is good but kind of spendy. And is there a brand of self-tanner anywhere that doesn't have the weird telltale fake bake smell?
3) I'm not sure I get why the judges LOVE Siobhan and Paige on American Idol. But it could just be me.
- - -
And finally, I hope to see you Sunday at The Knitter's Studio!
Rachael Herron and I will be doing a little reading/talking/signing thing together at the Knitter's Studio in Los Angeles this Sunday (March 21, 2010) from 2 p.m. to 4 p.m.
The shop is located at 8118 West 3rd Street, Los Angeles, CA, 90048. I'm going to bring my knitting and hope you will join us for a fun afternoon of knitting and chatting and book-reading. Do not fear! I plan to wear long pants and boots and pretend it is still winter so you will not be blinded by my marshmallow legs.
Posted by laurie at 08:28 AM | Comments (62)
March 12, 2010
Cat Picture Friday
Some cuteness to offset the whackness that was this week:
I love how my new camera is so good it shows all the cat fur on the blanket. Ewww.
- - -
What did you think of Idol results? I felt so bad for the guy with the mullet, the one with stage fright. That's the level of stage paralysis I myself have and I kept hollering at my TV set, "Get that boy some beta blockers and Xanax, stat!" but I guess drugging the contestants is not part of the American Idol master plan.
- - -
Have a good weekend!
Posted by laurie at 09:36 AM | Comments (52)
March 11, 2010
Random tidbits on Thursday
After writing about my everything-but-the-kitchen-sink pasta sauce that I usually serve over corn pasta I got this email:
Do you like that corn pasta? I have celiac disease and I haven't tried corn pasta yet. I've tried the rice pasta (terrible!) but read somewhere else that the best pasta is made by Tinkyada. I pretty much gave up on pasta after the celiac diagnosis, and I love a good food adventure, but I sure don't like to spend major $$$ on gluten-free food unless I know for sure it's good!Take care!
--Tania (rhymes with lasagna, which I can't eat, but maybe I should make it with zucchini, I hear it's pretty good that way.)
Hi Tania! In my opinion, the corn pasta is well worth the money. It's not exactly like wheat pasta but it's better than most gluten-free foods I have tried. The corn holds up well and with a good sauce you can barely tell the difference (or at least I can't but then again I am not a pasta connoisseur). I don't eat it very often but when I do I like it a lot!
It's not any more expensive than wheat pasta, at least not the DeBoles brand. It's on sale this week if you have a Whole Foods near you, I think I got a box last weekend for around $1.79.
The only caveat is that you must use a very large pot of boiling water (not a smaller pot) and when you put the pasta in to cook, stir it immediately and keep stirring it regularly during the first few minutes of cooking or it will clump together. I like it much better than the brown rice pasta, which I found doughy and spongy. I've heard you have to watch the rice pasta like a hawk to be sure you don't overcook it and I'm simply not that attentive in the kitchen. I need food that is less fussy about its cooktime, so the corn works better for me. It's a good alternative for people who want to eat less wheat or those who have a sensitivity to it.
- - -
My favorite comment from yesterday by Three Good Rats:
I oppose the time change because it is confusing and gains us nothing. But I also think the US should adopt the metric system, so I am the queen of unpopular causes.
When Jen and Amber and Shannon and I went to Paris I turned to Shannon one night in our room, I think we were fairly intoxicated at this point, and said, "This wine is metric! So we can drink more of it, just like you can walk more kilometers than miles!" and this amused us to no end.
- - -
I have my performance review later this morning. I am wearing my most conservative outfit, which is just my normal clothes with a boxy jacket on top of it all. I sort of look like a rectangle with a blonde head poking out.
- - -
That's it. Today's a good Q&A day if you have any questions I'll try to answer. Oh, and no I haven't forgotten I promised to show how I sew on buttons but I just haven't done it yet. Whoops!
Posted by laurie at 08:42 AM | Comments (71)
March 10, 2010
Nothing to see here, move along!
Busy, busy day ahead. This morning in the shower I started stressing out about the time change coming up because I can't take losing an hour! No! I will not go quietly into the daylight savings!
I don't know why we still do this time change thing anyway. Why can't we have one time and keep it all year? I realize we have larger issues facing us as a planet and all, but I am very stuck on the weird time change rules. Everyone has a cause. Apparently this is mine.
I like this guy's cause:
Amen, brother!
Posted by laurie at 09:13 AM | Comments (64)
March 08, 2010
I'll take a Jeremy Renner-George Clooney sandwich, please
On Sunday I watched the Oscars, including way too much of the seventeen hour pre-show. It's like tailgating for couch potatoes. I love watching the stars chitchat awkwardly on the red carpet and pose and try to say profound things even though most are already two sheets to the wind.
On Sunday I also made the alleged Kale Chips I have been hearing so much about and I can assure you, they won no awards. You can search online and find all kinds of variations on the recipe but it's basically kale, oil, seasonings and a hot oven.
I used Lacinto kale (also called black kale or Tuscan kale) because I prefer its flavor over curly kale. I am always and forever trying to sneak kale into my food to make me feel healthier and I like the Lacinto kale best. It's great mashed in with potatoes or in my favorite chickpea stew.
This is what kale looks like washed and patted dry:
Here it is with the big leafy stem removed and cut into pieces:
Below is a picture of it on the baking sheet. I used reader Rachel's tip and sprayed mine with olive oil rather than tossing in oil since I am not much of a drizzler, I tend to be a pourer (which works well on Brussels sprouts, but maybe not on leaf bits.)
And here they are at the end, cooked and crispy and seasoned with sea salt:
Awful. Really awful. But listen, you may find this is right up your alley. I think it's a tastebud issue, because this tasted just like toasted nori to me and I hate toasted nori. I can't stand the taste of nori, no matter how many times I try to like it. I took one bite of one of these kale chips and gagged. I took another bite to be sure, because I am a slow learner and I always like to give food a second chance, then I threw the rest of the cooked leaves away.
I still had a pile of uncooked kale left so I chopped it and added it to my everything-but-the-kitchen-sink pasta sauce that was simmering away on the stove. Every few weeks I make this sauce, you just start with a little garlic and some shallots and sautee them in olive oil. Then add in chopped tomatoes (I like cherry tomatoes best) and whatever else suits you. For this one I put in finely chopped zucchini and carrots, some cured black olives and some balsamic vinegar.
Then I added in kale and later basil:
You can see the steam coming off it! It's a good sauce. I serve it over corn pasta and add a little goat cheese and some pine nuts to the top. It's yummy and re-heats well for lunches.
I'm glad I tried the kale chips because I was curious about them and because it satisfies my goal of making new recipes this month but I won't be making that again. Yuck. I know a lot of people rave about them though, so you may find them just tasty as can be. I guess I prefer my kale sneaky and finely chopped into sauces or stews ... more of a supporting actor than the main event!
Posted by laurie at 09:16 AM | Comments (59)
March 02, 2010
Me & Rachael at the Knitter's Studio March 21 (Or: "Me and Julio down at the schoolyard...")
Why is it that my brain works song lyrics into every conversation, thought or idea and yet I myself cannot carry a tune in a bucket? I was singing "Happy Birthday" in a group recently and someone turned to me and said, "I am so glad you chose writing instead of singing!" Heh.
First, thanks for all the interesting and thought-provoking comments yesterday. I read each and every one and appreciated them all. You gave me a lot to think about and it is incredibly reassuring to know I am not the only one who gets flummoxed in conversations about weight. It's just so tricky a subject for me, and for so many folks.
Also I loved the people who pointed out there is so much more in the world to discuss that is far more interesting, exciting and scintillating that weight. Amen, people. Amen.
Like, for example, today being the day that my friend Rachael Herron's brand new book is finally available!
How to Knit a Love Song:
A Cypress Hollow Yarn
Rachael and I will be doing a little reading/talking/signing thing together at the lovely Knitter's Studio in Los Angeles on Sunday, March 21, 2010 at 2 p.m. The Knitter's Studio is located at: 8118 West 3rd Street, Los Angeles CA 90048. I'm going to bring my knitting and hope you will join us for a fun afternoon of knitting and chatting and book-reading.
Congrats, Rachael!!!
Posted by laurie at 07:43 AM | Comments (31)
March 01, 2010
March check in
Over the weekend I actually did a few things and even took pictures but I'll talk about them later in the week when they are thoroughly not fresh anymore... because today is March One! Time for a check in.
March is usually the time when my New Year's Resolutions begin to slip away, then I meander aimlessly toward my birthday in June when I make a new set of to-do items aimed to get me back on track. I'm actually glad this year I made the decision to write at the beginning of each month and check in with myself and my goals because it keeps them at the top of my priority list, which was the point of setting goals to begin with. Of course when it's August and my check in is "Yes, last month happened. Moving on...." we'll all have a good laugh and... uh, move on.
All of my lists and goals and tasks are always about two essential things: getting physically healthy and getting happy. So this year I broke it down into just those two goals.
Goal #1: Get Healthy
I dreaded my book event for many reasons but let's be honest: mostly I just didn't want to stand up in front of a room of people with cameras and be fat. But you know what? I lived. It ended up being really fun. Was I at my ideal size? No. Did it affect the quality of my penmanship as I signed books? Not a bit.
Listen, 2009 was a rough year. I found out I had this weird malady that I don't talk about because I don't want to be the poster child for said condition. But it involves really re-thinking everything you eat and I kind of sucked at it and by year's end I had gained a lot of weight. I also got pretty sick, which is why I seemed to remain perpetually two steps from the morgue from September through the end of last year. By December 31, 2009, I was sick and tired of being sick and tired and I started the new year with real determination to get healthier.
I specifically did NOT make this goal about weight and have very carefully avoided talking about losing weight as a goal because I don't want or need dieting advice. (I still got an email last month from a male reader who said, "All you need to do is eat less and exercise more." And I thought silently to myself, "OH NO!! REALLY!! YOU SHOULD ALERT THE MEDIA!!!")
People who have never struggled with their weight don't realize this but most of us who do struggle with this issue know more about dieting and calories and diet plans and exercise regimes than anyone. We don't need a better book or how-to manual. We know what to do. We just don't do it. And speaking for myself I can tell you that I have been on a diet on and off for thirty years of my life and my weight problem is not going to be solved by another diet. My weight issue is between my ears. It's in my head, folks. I have to work on me, the inside-me, for the outside to fall in line.
This is why I have never considered weight loss surgery. I would be one of those people who gain it all back. I know this because fixing my weight issue starts in my head, in my thinking and in my way of dealing with stress and emotions.
For those of you who don't get it, maybe you think "Just put down the fork! Just go for a walk!" but think carefully about your own life and that one issue you have that shames you, that stops you cold sometimes, that one area of yourself you want to change. Is it compulsive spending? Obsessive hoarding? Terrible money management? Dating guys who treat you poorly? Going after married men? Substance abuse? Constant inertia in your job/life/family? Whatever it is, that problem you have, well -- that's what it's like for someone with a weight issue. It's an issue, just one that is more visible to the world. And it changes only with a combination of behavior modification and real effort to re-think your mental approach to it.
I'm focusing on getting healthy because it's systemic. It's not a diet, you can't fail it, you can't do it for anyone but you, and there are lots of cool components to it.
In February my goal was to build on the stuff I was doing right, like cook all my own food and go for walks in the mornings. I also wanted to work on getting better at having breakfast regularly. I was skipping breakfast because I didn't want to take the five or six minutes each morning to prepare it, which is just silly. So I decided to buy honey and cinnamon and leave it at my office and bring yogurt and eat that at my desk each day. It's going very well!
I didn't walk very much at all in February, a combination of rain and exhaustion and creativity with excuses... so in March my goal is to walk every day, even if just for ten minutes. I'm happy to say I have thus far walked every day in March. You know, meaning today.
My other goal for March is to try a new recipe every weekend this month because I'm starting to get in a food rut, making generally the same meals day in and day out. But this whole roasted vegetable thing has been a revolution in my life. I am a roasting fool! I love it, I can eat a whole pan of roasted anything for dinner and it's just delicious and perfect.
I'm happy with my progress, even if it is slow. But real change, very significant change, is going to take a while in my poor diet-broken brain.
So it's progress, it's good. It's March and I'm still moving forward.
- - -
Goal #2: Get Happy
Well, I had a longer and more philosophical title for this resolution but the basic principle is to be happier, say yes to the best of life and ignore the icky, nasty bits.
Usually for me this is an attitude issue. For example, I could have spent LOTS of hours beating myself up mentally for not being the lithe skinnier me of my dreams for my book signing. But I recognize that you cannot go back in time and make better decisions, no matter how hard you want to do that. So, instead of flogging myself mentally I just gave it up and decided to make better decisions each day moving forward.
Sounds small, but it's a big deal for me.
I also noticed at my event last Thursday that I was more excited than nervous, a sure sign I need to get out a little more. I tend to be a recluse of Howard Hughsian proportions so in March I already have several things planned that will be nice little excursions with friends. You know, say yes and all that...
- - -
Oh, there was one other thing that happened but I'm not sure if it falls under Goal 1 or 2, it's kind of both. At the beginning of February a very, VERY thin acquaintance of mine started complaining to me about how she had gained five pounds. I have never understood why skinny people think it is cool to complain to a fat person about how awful and horrible and disgusting their invisible weight gain is. To me it's like turning to a person who just lost their job and complaining about your lousy 5 percent pay raise and 4500K bonus.
In the past I used to get really annoyed with the "Oh my God, I am so fat, I gained half a pound!" stuff. In my world that's a sandwich. You want to talk to me about a serious weight issue, call me when you have 100 pounds to lose and we'll talk.
BUT I have finally learned that skinny people don't see it like that. I have a lot of very lovely, very skinny girlfriends and to them I guess gaining five pounds really is a horrible, terrifying thing. It's hard for me to listen to this and not think, "Wow, if you think five pounds is disgusting, why are you even speaking to me, who by your own standards is a freakshow?" But it's not always about me. (Amazing, I know.)
I'm starting to realize that just because a skinny person acts like five nascent pounds is the difference between happiness and despair doesn't mean she is looking at me and thinking I'm horrible and tragic for carrying way more than five wayward pounds. And if she is judging me harshly that is her problem. And everyone has their issues, all of us. So what if I can't deeply relate to someone's fear of five pounds? I'm sure my fears of standing in front of a big crowd at a bookstore and having to (gasp) sign books sounds pretty silly. Everybody's got their stuff.
I've been thinking about all this because I'm not sure I handled the friend with the five pounds that well. At first I said, "Oh you always look tiny and great, if you gained weight it definitely is not visible..." and then she started vehemently arguing with me to tell me just how fat she was. I kind of froze, I had no idea what to say to this obviously bone-skinny person who maybe weighs ninety pounds soaking wet who is going on and on and on and on and on about how fat she is. So I tried to change the subject. Probably not perfect, but I am flummoxed when skinny people try to tell me, a very large person, how fat they are. I don't want to be snippy. I don't want to make an issue out of it. But I don't want to participate in it. Do you just listen and nod? Are you supposed to agree with them? Isn't that weird?
Any ideas on the right way to handle this?
I was pleased that I didn't get irritable with her -- she is a lovely, decent person who probably had no idea how weird that was for me -- and I didn't make it into a big deal. It shouldn't be a big deal! But I think there was a better way for me to handle it, I just don't know what the better way is.
The reality is that this is Los Angeles and it's full of skinny women who talk about their nonexistent weight problems all the time. I don't get it, it makes no sense to me, but it is what it is. Skinny folks aren't going to stop complaining about how fat they are just like I will never stop complaining about how hot it is in the Valley all summer.
So since I can't change other people, I might as well change how I react to them. I'm open to ideas if you have them!
And hellooooooo March!
Posted by laurie at 11:07 AM | Comments (166)
February 23, 2010
Seafood success; If only I were a betting fool...
Tuesday! That means American Idol and dinner at home with a nice glass of wine and a good dinner. This may surprise you, but I am even the one cooking a good dinner!
My cooking skills are mediocre at best, I am able to make certain things pretty well but I tend to stick with basics and I often overcook everything. A lot. That's fine for a roast in the crockpot but not so fine with delicate foods and especially seafood.
I have discovered maybe the only foolproof way ever for me to cook fish without it becoming a rubbery, overcooked mess: Fish in papillote. I was watching the Food Network one day a few weeks ago and saw Melissa D'Arabian making this recipe and it looked easy enough for me to try it. And it's GREAT! I've become completely hooked on it. I get so tired of chicken or rice and beans all the time, which are my usual default dinners. (Or microwaved popcorn!) And awesomely enough, I found fresh Dover Sole at Whole Foods for $8.99 a pound, which is cheaper than the organic chicken I usually buy. And a pound of sole is a LOT of seafood. For just one person you only need 4 fillets or so at a time for two or three meals and that will run you about $4. This fish is very mild and the fillets are thinly cut so they cook quickly, too.
Before starting, I cut up a few carrots, some zucchini and a yellow bell pepper very thinly and put them in individual baggies to cut down on my prep time during the week. If you pre-cut your veggies over the weekend you could make this dish in under 5 minutes of prep and just 12 minutes of cooking time, which is about all I can do when I get home at night. Here are the ingredients I used:
Parchment paper, baggies of zucchini, carrots and peppers, one lemon, old bay seasoning.
I put the fish on the parchment paper:
The lemon I'm using is a Meyer Lemon, a little sweeter than a normal lemon. Squeeze half a small lemon on the fish and slice the other half into thin slices. Then sprinkle the fish with Old Bay and layer on a few lemon slices (I like lemony seafood, but you could cut down on the lemon and use white wine like in the Food Network recipe instead.)
Top with veggies and a final lemon slice:
Starting at one corner wrap the paper tightly so it makes a half-circle. It doesn't have to be perfect:
I've been cooking mine on a cookie sheet (lined with foil, just in case it spills which it hasn't) and I cook it for 12 minutes in a 375 degree oven. The veggies won't be super soft, but lightly steamed and nice and colorful. This is the packet when it comes out of the oven:
Slide it all onto a plate for a tasty dinner:
It's a great dinner, and only takes me 15 minutes start to finish (with the vegetables pre-cut, of course.) And I feel like I'm eating a real meal. I am just not one of those people who thinks salad is a meal. To me, a salad is something you pick around out while waiting for your real meal to arrive.
In the photo above I'm having this fish with a baked potato because it was a weekend and I had some time. But I also made the rice with caramelized shallots recipe featured in the same Ten Dollar Dinners show with the fish and it was very good. I used brown basmati rice in place of white rice and it was delicious, the shallots add a nice sweetness to the nutty basmati rice. Rice is easy to heat up during the week for quick weeknight dinners and goes well with this fish, too. I have to say I am impressed enough with this dish that I would even serve it to company. Plus the best part of all is there is NO cleanup! No icky fish pan to clean, and the house doesn't smell like fish thank goodness.
- - -
I'm so glad I decided to watch American Idol this season! I have decided I'm going to make a preliminary call and say who I think will be in the top 5:
Crystal is by far my favorite. I realize all this is totally premature since we haven't really heard any of them sing much but I thought I would call it now anyway and then at the end I could look back and see how close I was. I like to amuse myself with random prognosticating.
These two also make honorable mention:
I like this show because it's so much fun to watch people with talent chasing their dreams. And Ellen's doing a great job, I think, as a judge. What do you think? Are you watching this season?
Posted by laurie at 09:52 AM | Comments (63)
February 22, 2010
Last Monday in February list
1) Time passes, woman astonished
Whoa. Can you believe it is already the last week of February? I wonder if I am somehow small-brained in the Time Passing department, as I am always astonished to wake up and discover things like, holy moly it's 2010! Or ... it's already almost March 2010! This may be a very annoying quality of mine, my constant astonishment and wonder at the turning of the calendar pages. But on the other hand ... I have retained my wonder and astonishment at things like the ever-changing pages of the calendar. I'm kind of like a puppy that way.
2) Time passes, woman too busy making three-letter words to notice
Online Boggle is the best invention ever. I have a doctor's appointment later today and the waiting room is always this long ordeal and now I can play boggle on my phone and I am actually looking forward to it. (See: "easily amused puppylike brain" above.)
3) Laundry Haiku:
Big pile of laundry
Why do you mock me like that?
I think you eat socks.
4) Blame it on the Barefoot Contessa
After watching too much tivo-d Food Network programming this weekend I want to go to Paris and make an arugula salad with warm butternut squash. And I don't even like arugula.
5) Or blame it on Gwyneth and pals
I love watching that show Spain... On the Road Again which makes me forget laundry and work and everything else that's piled up and instead makes me think of driving through the Spanish countryside with nothing ahead but a good meal and some sightseeing.
Posted by laurie at 09:32 AM | Comments (52)
February 16, 2010
Signs, signs, everywhere a sign
He's talking on a cellphone, though you can't really see it in the picture. Reminds me of a sign they have posted at church, "God may be calling you... but not on your cellphone. Please turn off all phones during services."
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The sign in the window says, "Our buns are freshly baked. And quite honestly that's as personal as we're going to get."
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Sign of cuteness!
Posted by laurie at 09:06 AM
February 13, 2010
Weekend
For the past three years I've made sure to plan a vacation over Valentine's weekend and it's been great, like a little love letter to my wandering gypsy side. This year I couldn't really plan anything because I knew there was going to be at least some promo for my book and nothing was firmed up until recently. It's been good, though, it's given me an opportunity to try and get my finances smoothed out (moving is very expensive!) and it will be nice for a change to have some vacation time left at the end of the year. Usually I use it all up by March!
And my parents are coming in April or May and I want to be able to visit with them, so I won't be traveling at all until perhaps this summer. Part of me has been very content to just stay home and hermit, which I can do like it's an Olympic sport. I realize now that going on trips is good for me in an unexpected way, it gets me out of my house! And out of my head. I tend toward the habitual, and so when I am being a homebody I get more and more reclusive. A trip here or there a few times a year keeps me open to new possibilities, new adventures.
People are often like that, I think, we get used to something and keep doing it until jogged out of the rut. It's not a bad thing. I'm perfectly happy at home, I love being silent and productive on my little tasks, writing or knitting or just cleaning the house, making some new recipe. My home life is a sanctuary. I love my animals, I love keeping myself entertained with a good book or a funky knitting project or just re-arranging all the stuff in my bathroom cabinet. I suppose some people find that totally strange, how can one be perfectly satisfied and content alone? But to me it's the epitome of peace.
Traveling is good for me to get me away from my safe, contained place and jolt me into the unexpected. It's the best way for me because it feels like adventure, and it makes you appreciative of the world and even more grateful to return to your own bed. Before I recognized what an introvert I am I used to force myself to go and do and see every weekend something new and it chipped away at my energy and I felt frazzled. This new life seems to be working better for me, it's certainly less scheduled and eventful but gives me room for those bigger escapes a few times a year, instead of always trying to mix it up each weekend.
The ads on TV and the radio and the huge displays in the grocery store around Valentine's Day remind me that our programming is all geared towards pairing up. Our culture isn't built around single people, the single lifestyle. Pairing up is what's more common and of course it's a good part of life, too! But there are a lot of paths to happiness. Finally I really understand that being solo isn't the same as being lonely. It took me a long time to get it. Five years ago when I was going through my divorce and even the whole year or two afterward my focus was still on a man, some man, whoever he might be one day in the future. There was a sense of my life suspended in waiting, in the time between companions. It never occurred to me I would find happiness as a single person. It simply never dawned on me that I might consciously choose to be the captain of my own ship for a while.
What a surprise to discover my best companion is me! All that time I spent wanting somebody to complete my life, expecting that I would need to find another man to add peace or love or contentment. For so long that was the goal -- fix myself so I would find a great guy -- and all the other pieces of my life (my job, my hopes, my goals, my desires, my home, my clothes, my social life) were just a framework to get myself into another relationship.
Oh -- and thinking I had to wait until I met a man to travel again! It wasn't obvious to me that I could do all this on my own, or that I could feel happiness from just doing well at living my life. I was gobsmacked. I had no frame for the mental picture, I carried inside me an expectation that really good vacations happened with family or with a husband.
It was astonishing to discover I prefer traveling alone. Dude - I LOVE IT. I love relying on myself to make plans and I always come through for myself. I work hard when needed and leave the rest up to happenstance and magic. It's a leap of faith -- faith in me, and faith that I can handle whatever weird situation the travel gods have put me in. I love the freedom of possibility. I love the knowledge that wherever I am I will laugh and so will the person holding the boarding pass, especially when they see my godawful driver's license picture. That piece of work is a built in laugh-a-tron. I believe life gives you what you want and what you need. And at home I like making the big decisions, I like knowing I can depend on myself, I like being resourceful and not always knowing how it will come out.
That is how my singledom has unfolded. There's no proof of a great plan. No proof I get to see Roy reincarnated. But I am single with the Universe getting my back. We're not alone, we have ourselves and our spirits behind us. When a vacation goes wrong these days it's not because my husband let me down or I failed, it's just part of life. I turn it into a funny story. And now I can't imagine it any other way, I can't imagine ever going backwards and expecting someone else to make me happy. Happiness is an inside job. How can any other human being ever look inside your heart and see what will make you happy? Especially when most of us don't even know ourselves? I love the idea of lifting yourself up to possibility. I am hopeful, I am optimistic, and I think pure hope can dash fear. I think life is wide and we are small.
I would have never guessed any of this. It's a revelation. I know it's not everyone's first choice, and how I landed here is a mystery even to me, I was so dead set on hooking my wagon to someone else's for so long that I'm as shocked as anyone to be a single woman all happy and stuff. But it's a very good place to be for me. Coupling has never felt as good to me as independence feels.
Listen: I'm thrilled for those who meet someone that sets their heart on fire and makes their life colorful and full. And I'm relieved to see not everyone has to follow my path to be happy. There are so many roads to personal fulfillment, even ones I never expected. I'm happy for all of us, those who fit the bill and those of us who wandered a bit. We create a new happy each day, each in our own way. The woman who chooses to be a single parent. The woman who chooses to divorce and live with her partner without a contract. The woman who marries another woman. The man who proposes to his boyfriend. The woman who falls in love at 63 and meets THE ONE and he's only 57. Or the woman in Los Angeles who has three cats and a room of yarn and is astonished to discover she is happy all alone, for once in her life she has the say on everything and it makes her heart sing. She feels generous because she now has just enough.
To all of them I say thank you, I love you, keep on keeping on.
To all those people, I wish you mad Valentine love.
To my single friends who feel what I'm saying here (minus the hokey kumbaya stuff) ...it is good to be alive. And all the chocolate will go on sale tomorrow!
Posted by laurie at 01:02 AM | Comments (101)
February 12, 2010
Everything has come down with a case of pink and frilly!
Just in case you somehow someway forgot that Valentine's Day was around the corner, a quick trip to the local grocery store will bring it all back in focus:
I felt like I was being pummeled with fake love and Mylar. I got my fizzy water and instant coffee and left with the quickness.
My little Valentines are at home anxiously awaiting my return:
Yeah, real anxious...
Oh, one last thing... my publicist Kim Weiss sent me this info about a new series of books that will feature real-life romance stories:
Do you have a sexy, steamy, bigger-than-life, or just plain worthwhile love story to tell? Want it romanticized by an actual romance novelist?You can submit your own story to VOWS and qualify for one of two (or both) prizes. There will be a monthly winner in an ongoing "best story" contest. Winners will get their choice of a dozen long stemmed red roses or a box of Godiva chocolates. For details, click here.
My romance story that involves an amazing sale on Noro and a bottle of wine apparently isn't what they're looking for, but you may have just the love story to win a prize!
And on this Valentine's weekend, my pink contribution to the world will be finally finishing the baby booties that go with Courtney's baby sweater and sending them off in hopes that this gift reaches her before her child is off to college:
Happy Weekend of chocolate!
Posted by laurie at 08:52 AM | Comments (35)
February 09, 2010
Bold return of the crazy camera lady eminent, bring two double-A batteries, stat!
Hello! First of all, thank you so much for the comments and emails telling me about your cameras and your reviews. It was a tough decision. I've had my purchase for about a week now and while it was a slow start getting to know each other we have since grown very close and the Dyson is feeling jealous. Ah, the secret life of electronics.
That cat lady, she crazy.
I went with the Canon PowerShot A1100IS
The shutter button is also very obvious so if you're off traveling and ask a stranger who doesn't speak your language to take your picture they would know intuitively which button to push. (Or if you've had too much wine. It happens.) Everything is clearly marked and the buttons are spaced well enough that you don't accidentally hit three at one time if you have pudgy little fingers like I do.
The test images I took in very low light were mostly good, some were grainy but not one came out blurry like my lemon. And that's the test, because I can retouch grainy but you can't come back from blurry. I expected some visual noise with a point-and-shoot in dim lighting (if you ever find a point-and-shoot camera that has no noise in low light settings, you must tell me!) But almost all my display is online so I can live with it. I'm only pointing this out because if you want a camera that can produce poster-size prints without a flash, this would not be a first choice.
Aren't you planning to make this into a poster?
I would recommend this camera 100% for anyone who is a novice and wants a VERY user-friendly camera. It is definitely simple to use and I love that. But I do find it irritating that no one gives the consumer a full user's manual anymore -- hello, we would pay $2 extra for a pocket size booklet of the full user's guide included in the box! -- because it improves picture quality if you know all the nuances of the settings. I went online and downloaded the full manual but wish they'd just included it. And there was no carrying case, which was surprising, not even a cheapo cloth case.
It took me a few minutes to get the auto-timer working just so, but I finally found it and tested it out. Being able to set a timer is a MUST when you travel alone. (By the way, if you do travel alone, I highly recommend the Gorillapod Flexible Tripod
I almost got caught up in trying to buy something fancier but Work Jennifer helped me do a reality check and remember I mostly take pictures of cats and bumper stickers and funny signs. I don't need a thousand dollar camera with changeable lenses and extreme telephoto. Now I'm really glad I went with an easypeasy camera, I love it. The test pictures of the cats came out well even in a dark room and the knitting close-ups I took are fine, too:
Cat paw super close-up!
Bob asleep at the foot of the bed. Awww.
Mystery knitting close up in a dimly lit room and no flash.
And of course the big question is... can I take good pictures of my TV weatherman Dallas Raines like the reclusive little stalker I am...
Oh yeah, Dapper Dallas forecasting rain and sun and flying palm trees all in one day!
The one downside is that the lag time between shots is awfully long, you have to wait a few seconds for the camera to record the image and be ready for the next shot. I haven't tried the video yet so I can't comment on it.
Overall, though, I'm happy. I am mostly happy to have decided on something and be done with it! I got a little stressed out looking for a camera. I was searching and reading and poring over all the reviews and I was getting hung up on buying THE PERFECT CAMERA. As soon as I noticed I was doing that, getting all mired down with the pursuit of impossible perfection, I made myself just choose one and move on. I know this one isn't PERFECT but I like it just fine and I'm trying to remember that the world will keep spinning on its axis if I decide a year later to sell it on ebay and buy a different one. It's a camera, not a heart transplant. Realistically I don't need the $500 rockstar point-and-shoot (though I almost bought this one instead: Canon PowerShot G11 10MP Digital Camera 
I can't believe how much cheaper electronics are year after year... my first digital camera cost over $400 and it had such limited features compared to all these newer models. Over the weekend as I tried out my new camera I remembered how reluctant I was to make the switch from film to digital. Now I can't imagine going back to film and waiting to get your pictures developed before seeing if any of your shots worked out. I like the instant satisfaction of seeing my cats both in person and on "film" right away!
Frankie says, "Relax!"
Posted by laurie at 09:21 AM | Comments (102)
February 08, 2010
Book signing on February 25th at The Grove in Los Angeles
Hello!
I am not touring for this book but I will be doing one reading/book signing in Los Angeles:
Barnes & Noble at The Grove
189 Grove Drive, Los Angeles, CA 90036
Thursday, February 25th, 2010
7:00 p.m. [ Map here ]
I am a little nervous. I haven't done any public appearances since 2006? 2007? And I've relapsed into my cozy hermit shell, where it's pleasant and there is TV. But I am excited to see folks I haven't seen in so long and chitchat and see what ya'll are knitting and look at your cute shoes and thank you for buying my book and also for agreeing with me that dating should come with hazard pay. I will also happily sign any book you buy, not just my books. I am flexible that way.
So there you have it. I will be at the bookstore on February 25th, all of me, so much more to go around this time! We will pretend I am taller, perhaps. Maybe I can find some really high heels. Or maybe I will get you all drunk so I look prettier through the misty haze of your tipsiness. Who knows! Be there or be a granny square!
Posted by laurie at 10:21 AM
February 02, 2010
Tuesday Five Things
1) Funny:
Hard to tell from my crappy picture, but that's Vitello's pizza on the left and just beside it on the right is SweetHarts, the candy shop run by the Hart family (of Melissa Joan Hart). Above both is the world's largest gastric band billboard. Funny?
2) Knitting
I have been knitting a baby sweater and booties set for my friend Courtney's new baby and by now I fear the child is already walking and will soon be driving while I am over here trying to finish a button band. I think the problem is that the pattern I chose looked better in the pictures than it does knitted up and since Courtney is a great knitter, I'm afraid she will think it's cheesy. Do I just finish it and wash it, block it and wrap it up and send it off with love or do I scrap the whole set and make something new? Tough to say. Maybe I'll do both. Send this off with a note that it was cuter in the pattern picture and then try to make her baby something really pretty at a later date.
3) TeeVee
I love television. This year I'm watching American Idol, which I haven't watched in over five years and I'm so glad I tuned in, I think there's something so entertainuplifting about watching people work toward a goal. Plus, I can't carry a tune in a bucket so I admire anyone with the ability to sing. And, just because it was on one night, I started watching the show that comes on after, Human Target. IT IS SO AWESOME. Cheesey fun entertainment in the ilk of Bond-meets-The Bodyguard. I'm also still watching Castle, which keeps getting better, and International House Hunters and all my usual addictions on The Travel Channel.
Last night I watched Anthony Bourdain in Prague and it made me feel a little sentimental about Prague and the great time I had there with Mr. X. But that was a long time ago, and one of the things most happy and liberating about my life now is that I am not afraid to go there by myself and make all sorts of new memories. Being the captain of your own ship can feel a little heavy sometimes, but it is also totally freeing in a way I never would have expected. I guess everything is two sides: the good and the not-so-good. Like the good Doctor Dyer says, every wave has a peak and a valley.
4) Book stuff
Apparently, I have an online book tour. I forgot I said yes to this, and so it snuck up on me. I have never done one of these but I agreed to it because I do not have to leave my house. I was sort of nervous, because I suck at promotion of pretty much every type and I didn't know what would happen. How nice to see the first person on the list was Kristy Sammis, who is like an old friend. So it's all very incestuous... just the way I like it and hopefully they will all be nice, which is all anyone who writes really wants. Forget constructive criticism, that is what the editor is for. Hah! Actually, it just dawned on me they're all doing book giveaways and I should do that too. I just got my shipment of books so maybe if I get my act together later this week or next week we can do that.
One thing I do love is how knitting folks all seem to stick together online. It's kind of the way the internet (and the world) should always be. I remember when the Yarn Harlot introduced herself to me at my first Book Expo and gave me a hug and it felt like finding a really solid anchor in the midst of a crazyass sea. Because of the blogtour thingy I've gotten to correspond this week with two of my favorite knitters, too, Wendy Johnson and Wendy Bernard. Knit people are good folks. I've met a lot of fancypants book people since all this started, and the knitters and crocheters are the only ones who are universally supportive, friendly and hoping you succeed, too. Some authors in other genres seem to feel if another writer gets a leg up it ruins their own chances. But with the yarn writers, they all seem to believe (as I do) that when one person gets an opportunity it opens the door wider for us all. I LOVE THAT.
5) Not All Pollyanna Fun & Games, Missy
I did lock myself out of my own Jeep this morning in the parking garage. I was on the phone with Drew and we were blabbing away happily and then I got out of the Jeep, locked and shut the driver's side door, walked to the passenger's side to get out my giganto-purse and my lunch and realized the door was locked. With my keys sitting in my purse pocket. Inside the Jeep. Luckily I know the secret whatsithaveyou to breaking into my own car, so I broke in just as Jennifer walked up and laughed at me (we work in the same building.) I am so happy that my two best friends, Drew and Jen, got to simultaneously witness me breaking into my own car on a Tuesday morning, an auspicious beginning to a day.
Oh, and I ate breakfast this morning. Thank goodness, I needed my strength for breaking and entering.
Posted by laurie at 10:18 AM | Comments (58)
February 01, 2010
February check in
It seems like five minutes ago that I was sitting down with a fresh notebook and a pen, contemplating my navel and making New Year's Resolutions. And now we're already a month in!
While I doubt this is as scintillating as, say, knitting content or videos of my cat sleeping, I thought I would post a little progress report at the beginning of each month here in my online diary more to keep me accountable than anything else.
Priority #1: Get Healthy
Progress: This is a tricky subject to write about because a lot of getting healthy is about food but it's so easy to devolve into diet mentality and start listing what you ate and grading yourself like a character assessment ("I ate this and am therefore good, I ate that and am therefore bad...") and honestly there is nothing more cliche or boring in this world to me than a woman blathering on about what she ate that day like a verbal diet diary. BO-RING. Useless. Unproductive. Total diet-brain stereotype.
So, having said that, I'm making good progress in my goal to be healthier. There is a food component, of course, but I'm trying to look at the whole and not be so weird about being ON PLAN or OFF PLAN and just remember you get one life with a lot of days and a lot of meals and the goal is to make basically healthy choices, that's the plan stan. (It is not the two tablespoons of olive oil on the roasted cauliflower that make you fat.)
The immediate challenge was to reign in my repertoire of mostly drive-through and junk food, none of which has any real nutritional value. Since the beginning of January I've been cooking all my meals except the occasional microwaved popcorn. The key is all the prep work on the weekends. I make sure to cook and assemble all my lunches on Sunday afternoon and pack my lunch bag every night before going to bed. It takes a lot of thinking ahead but it's worth it -- lunch is so easy during the week.
Dinners need to be quick -- I commute and I'm starving when I get home -- so I have been making staples ahead of time and re-heating them when I get home which is working out really well. Even roasted veggies re-heat well in the oven (I think they come back better in the oven for ten minutes on 300 than in the microwave.) I've been bringing snacks, too, mostly apples and walnuts because they keep longer and I like them. I'm discovering I'm more of a veggies person than a fruit person. I would rather eat a bowl of green beans than peel and eat an orange. But I like apples and they're portable.
I'm still having a hard time finding a workable breakfast, sometimes all I want is a coffee on the way to work. In February I want to work on getting a better breakfast routine.
All in all though, I'm pretty happy about cooking my own food. I like experimenting with new recipes and finding new foods (Brussels sprouts! who would have guessed it!) and I'm working very hard to keep sane about all this. If I start counting carbs or points or calories, someone smack me.
Exercise: I bought some awesome Nike shoes on sale right before the new year and I ordered the Nike + SportBand
So overall I am making progress in the health arena. Mostly little changes here and there, the biggest change being all the cooking and washing and chopping and so on. It is time consuming but it's getting easier each week. One thing I keep reminding myself is to look how fast January went by! And to remember that the small changes are cumulative and over time will make a larger change in my health and shape. At the beginning of the month it felt daunting to cook all my meals from scratch for four weeks but it went by in a blink and now already we're in month two of twelve. It really does get easier each passing day and I'm finally not having those McDonald's french fries detox pains anymore. I swear, I think McDonald's is more addictive than crack. Not that I have done a comparative study, mind you.
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Priority #2: Come from an attitude of yes.
Progress: This is kind of one of those hippdippy resolutions that is so loosely defined it may not mean anything to anyone but me. Basically, I want to focus more on the good parts and less on the icky parts of life, looking for ways up instead of finding all the ways down.
My progress this past month has been ... interesting. I had a few times where I knew I overreacted to something or got upset about something I should have just let go. I want to get better at letting go of other people's crap. The Dalai Lama says you have all the power in your life to choose how you feel about someone else's words or actions. Except I noticed a few times last month that I get all inflamed with emotion before my brain even kicks in! Guess that is why he is the Dalai Lama and I am Her Ladyship PantiesInAWad.
Last week was particularly rocky and I didn't handle a difficult person very well. Luckily every passing moment is a chance to turn it all around. (Uh, it took me the whole week.) The biggest thing I want to work on in February is to institute a cooling-down period. Had I just taken a step or five back and waited to reply or respond to the difficult person, I may have had much better results. I tend to speak without a filter and I also get emotional about stupid stuff that isn't even that important. A cooling-off period helps me put things into perspective.
There were a few times this past month, though, when I started to really dwell on something icky and I caught myself mid-ick and made my brain think other thoughts until I honestly felt happier. So that is progress!! My favorite thought is just a little fantasy picture: Me sitting in a cafe in Paris (I get to imagine what I am wearing, down to my shoes) and I'm stirring a spoon through a steaming hot cup of coffee with milk. On the table is the cup and saucer, a smaller saucer with a few cubes of sugar, maybe a candle, or a place mat, a napkin. I have a guidebook with me, it's sitting out by the cup. Nothing of consequence happens in this scene, I'm just stirring the coffee in a Parisian cafe as the world walks by.
Thinking up that little picture makes crummy stuff in real life evaporate. It reminds me that the globe is large, much larger than the beige office or the crawling commute or the floors that need mopping.
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I'm not sure how this is related to those resolutions, exactly, but it is: ever since I moved I've found it impossible to part with anything. It's only been a few months but still, it's very odd. I know I have tendencies to hoard and I try very hard to be diligent and clean and cull and let go of things when I need to. But I have been unable to let go of anything for a few months (except trash of course). It became very apparent to me the day I received a duplicate of a book I already owned and instead of passing it along I shelved it right up on the bookshelf next to its twin.
WEIRD. Even for me.
Last month I realized it was a combination of anxiety and discomfort and I figured it would work itself out. I'd also just parted with a huge chunk of stuff all at once when I moved, and maybe I needed a little time. I don't know.
Slowly (in the past week and a half) I've started easing up and over the weekend I took a whole Jeepload of stuff to the Goodwill, mostly clothes and things I found when I moved that I should have let go of back in September instead of moving them with me. And of course that extra book! And some other odds and ends. I also cleared out a big bag of papers and magazines and junk and went through my closet one more time and found some winter coats that don't fit and I donated those, too.
It felt good to clean up and clean out. I think it's a positive sign that I can at least tell when something is weird with me and I'm willing to let it work itself out. And it did work itself, I guess, since I felt a lot of relief cleaning the closet and getting rid of unneeded clutter.
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Well, that was January. I ordered a new camera but it hasn't come yet. All empowered by the brilliant idea (after many many moons) to get rid of my lemon camera, I looked around my life for other lemons to eliminate. This weekend I made a list of other funkadelic things that are nagging at me and I'm going to fix or get rid of the irritation. Some will have to wait because of the cost, but some things I can fix myself. That has got to be a good step in the year of yes.
Posted by laurie at 09:49 AM | Comments (97)
January 29, 2010
Take a picture, it will last longer
Thanks so much for all the tips and input on digital cameras! I hadn't even heard of that Panasonic Lumix but it sounds interesting since it takes video, too. The Canon seems to be the overwhelming favorite. You've given me a lot to think about! This was the best insta-poll ever, thank you!
Oh -- and special thanks to the folks who said they also suffered with a Kodak lemon, too. No one believes me when I first tell them the camera is a lemon. So I hand it over. Then they use it. Days later the expert will give the camera back to me in disgust, defeated by the lemon. The exhilaration of know-it-all-ness is defeated by the agony of the lemon.
This process was especially frustrating because Kodak wouldn't take my camera back without a ridiculous restocking fee. (Lesson learned: buy from a place with a no-hassle return policy.) And I held out hope I could read the manual front to back, search online help forums, stand on my head and make it work. Later it was an irritation that was mildly amusing as a party trick ("Fine then -- you try to take good pictures with this camera! I dare you!") and now it's just gotten to the point where I hate to take any pictures at all. That's crazypants. I used to take hundreds of snapshots a week, especially of the cats or on vacation. And last year I think I only took a few hundred pics all year long. Vacations have gone virtually unrecorded, I ended up with maybe ten usable photos of my trip to Ireland.
Yesterday WorkJennifer and I were talking about this and I realized I felt so much RELIEF just deciding to buy a new camera. It's a small thing, really, and yet it makes me so happy. And the bigger lightbulb here is to stop being such a dumbaii and living with something irritating for almost TWO YEARS. I do not know why I am such a slow learner sometimes!
I'm going to make a conscious decision to pay more attention in my life and if there is something causing me low-grade irritation all the time (like the camera) I'm going to just fix it where it can be fixed. It's silly to let my cheapskatedness or laziness or unwillingness to just immediately chuck something that's a lemon win out over basic harmony. Life is too short to have a crappy camera in your pocket.
Wow, that was like going to church and getting religion. Combine that with the high of online shopping and I am so ready for the weekend. I'll let you know what I finally decide to get and how it works out... and I'll be using that 30-day no hassle return policy if needed!! (I guess I should be happy to see I can still learn from my mistakes, yes?) (Even if it takes me a long, long time.)
Posted by laurie at 10:12 AM | Comments (70)
January 27, 2010
I am the iceberg; camera help?
Geez, THIS WEEK.
Yesterday it was so insane that at 10 a.m. I declared to no one in particular, "I fear I have turned into the Titanic, sinking fast, and I am taking you all with me."
Depending on your definition of better today is "better" as I declared myself to be the iceberg instead of the Titanic, and my icy chill will destroy all I come into contact with!
Awesome.
- - -
Unrelated:
Even though I hate my camera I have not been inclined to buy a new one for all sorts of reasons consisting of laziness and cheapskatedness and general camera eschewingness.
But most of my pictures tend to look like this:
And that's after I have retouched them in Photoshop and done my artsy designery best. This camera is a lemon, and no setting or combination of setting or tinkering by any individual has ever managed to fix it. It is a lemon. For a while it was like a party trick -- complain about lousy camera, and someone in earshot would declare they could fix it. Hand over camera only to get it back by disgusted good-intentioned helper days later declaring, "This camera is an (expletive) piece of (expletive.)" Indeed!
The main issue is that the camera takes blurry pictures. Even using a tripod and a timer, the mere rotation of the earth on its axis is cause for blur. And you know, that is a problem.
So having complained about this for well over a year and a half now I have realized that perhaps eliminating irritations (such as replacing the camera that I HATE WITH A FIERY PASSION) is a good step in my Year of Yes. Wow, aren't I a brainiac? And it only took me a year and a half!
So I am going to buy a new camera. I want a simple point-and-shoot camera. Nothing crazypants fancy, nothing big and heavy, nothing super expensive. I like Kodak products (even though my lemon is a Kodak, I still love the way they render light and skintones) but I am open to other suggestions. I know that you all will have suggestions because you are smarter than Einstein me who needed a year and a half to decide the bad camera had to go and you probably like your camera. If you do have a suggestion, will you share?
La Soba really hates being blurry ... her personal paparazzo needs to upgrade!
Posted by laurie at 04:19 PM | Comments (274)
January 22, 2010
I like the nightlife, I like to boogie
Title of post not related to content. Just had that song in my head.
The local mountains are covered in snow, you can see them so clearly, it's beautiful. By now we've had dark skies and torrential rain for so long that the city has gone into mass sunlight deprivation and we're all turning into vampires, albeit ones who slurp down soy lattes instead of blood. Does blood have carbs? Do vampires wear Ugg boots?
Last night there was a huge storm in the Valley with lightening and thunder and hail! It was like being back in Mississippi, except inside an apartment meant to withstand things like sunshine and smog. I was worried the skylight would crack. But everything withstood the elements and all was well. The cats got freaked out, though, and I still cannot find my camera so you'll just have to imagine our snow-capped mountains and the sleeping furballs.
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I'm almost finished with a baby sweater for a friend who had her baby over a month ago and now I'm afraid the sweater will be too small. Bummer. Tomorrow I'm going to JoAnn's fabrics to find some cute buttons -- I love buttons, and if I find my camera I'll even (finally) take pictures of my super-dooper-no-fail button sewing method which is really simple and not worth the build up. But that's how we roll here in tabloid land.
And I want to dig through my stash and figure out what my next knitting project will be. It's so cold outside that it's perfect knitting weather! I have a whole bin of wool yarn in different colors that I bought on sale almost five years ago when I first learned to knit. Because I was a beginner and just yarn-excited, I bought without knowing what to do with the yarn, so of course I bought too much for a small project and too little for a big project but I kept it all this time because it's so darn pretty. I was thinking I might get it all out of the bin in the closet and use all the different colors to make a gigantic felted bag like one I saw in AlterKnits Felt
I've really liked making baby sweaters, though, they're small enough not to get boring and they're so cute. I do want to make a sweater for myself at some point but not yet. I think my next project should be something felted. I love how the fabric shrinks down like magic and gets so dense and fuzzy.
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Finally, I read an article yesterday online that was really interesting (read it here) about the well-meaning folks who are showing up unprepared in Haiti. I get it -- I also feel that deep urge of wanting to do something, anything, to help but then I remember who I am. Which is to say I don't speak Creole or French well enough to be a good translator, I have no medical experience or disaster relief experience, I don't know the lay of the land, I have no real ties to an established relief organization in the country and while I would be of no help at all I would likely try to bring home every person I met which of course you can't do unless you know how to get a passport and visa for everyone you meet.
In other words, the best way for me to help is with my pocketbook. I feel ridiculously lucky to have what I have in life and it's good to give generously to well-known groups who really can help (I chose the Red Cross.)
All this week I worried it was a little flippant to be joking about the rain and the flying palm trees when real devastation is happening somewhere else but obviously this website is built on the hard journalistic basics of whining about cat poop and weather and the trials and errors of reading a knitting pattern. That news article was a good reminder that even if I feel I am falling short because I am not helping with my hands, the reality is that my cash donation is more useful than my body ever could be.
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Have a good weekend!
Posted by laurie at 10:40 AM
January 21, 2010
Thing One and Thing Two
Day before yesterday I was on the phone with Drew and we were talking about all sorts of things as we are wont to do and during the conversation I had one epiphany and one funny memory, both of which I will share with you since I forgot where I last set down my camera and it has all the pictures of Dallas Raines and the cats on it I intended to share with you today. So until I can find my camera again we have no pictures, just a lot of blah blah.
Thing #1:
Drew and I were talking about roasted vegetables, my newest cooking obsession, and we were talking about all the things I could roast and then I asked, "Do you think these vegetables retain any nutritional value after being cooked on a high heat like that?"
And Drew thought about it and we started talking about the nutrition and all that and midway through the conversation I just stopped.
"Wait," I said. "No, no, no. This is how I get myself into trouble! I start focusing on these ridiculous details and trying to be perfect when really all I need to remember is that eating a delicious dinner of roasted vegetables is healthier and better for me than eating a quarter pounder with cheese and a large order of fries."
"Amen to that," he said.
See what a lifetime of dieting has done to my head? This is how I get off track and overweight, by focusing on rules and regulations and trying to be on some kind of plan and then when I find ways I am failing I fall into a ditch. For those of you who have never struggled with your weight this will make no sense. But I know at least one or two of you know exactly what I am talking about.
I was pretty happy I snapped out of my stupid analysis of the nutritional value of a vegetable. It's so unproductive to get caught up in diet-mentality, but if you have been on a diet since you were eight years old it's difficult to break out of the habit. We make it so hard but it's not supposed to be. As Michael Pollan says, "Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants." (His newest book Food Rules: An Eater's Manual
So, that was my epiphany.
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Thing #2:
While Drew and I were talking I mentioned that right now is an excellent time to book a vacation since everything is on sale, and I offered (so generously) to search for a cheap flight for him from Houston to somewhere (and I guess mysteriously I would also be there, too, how fun to invite yourself on other people's vacations!) and so I started plugging in cities. He said to try flights to Manchester, which I did, then we both started singing, "Manchester England England, across the Atlantic sea..." which is a song from the musical Hair
About five years ago I was in my Jeep on a perfect summer day and I had the top off the Jeep and the stereo cranked up SO LOUD and I was bumping the cast recording of the musical Hair. Because I am cool that way.
Something happened to my Jeep -- I can't remember what it was, the radiator exploded or the battery died or something, so I had to pull over on the side of the road and wait for the tow truck to come. The car was not operational. But it was just what happened back then. Things broke a lot.
The tow truck took my Jeep to a local garage and they pulled the car inside the garage and I signed the papers and then I went inside where they were trying to get it started. Finally, they managed to get the engine back alive and as it started back up, so did the stereo which was on full blast -- now inside the garage, so it was REALLY loud -- and everyone got an earful of:
Black boys are nutritious
Black boys fill me up
Black boys are so damn yummy
They satisfy my tummy...
All seven or eight guys in the garage turned at one time and stared at me.
"Yes, I just love musicals!" I said.
Then I quickly went outside. Far away outside. I smoked a cigarette (oh I do miss smoking) and I remember thinking to myself, "Wow, I wonder what they would have thought if I'd been listening to track number two on the CD when my car stopped."
(In case you don't know what I mean, here's a link to Hair: Original Soundtrack Recording - Special Anniversary Edition
Ah, memories.
Manchester England England across the Atlantic Sea! And I'm a genius genius ... I believe in God and I believe that God believes in Claude! That's me ... that's me ....
Posted by laurie at 09:27 AM | Comments (60)
January 15, 2010
Friday
I am so impressed with the mobile giving campaign to help the earthquake victims in Haiti -- apparently over $7 million has been received so far, with over $5 million going to the Red Cross. How COOL is that? If you want to use your cell phone for good instead of gabbing today, here's how:
To give to the Red Cross, phone users can text the word "HAITI" to 90999 to donate $10, and when prompted, hit "YES" to confirm the donation.The donation is added to the cell user's bill, and receipts are available.
Other text-message codes for donations include:
• Text the word "HAITI" to 20222 to donate $10 to the Clinton Foundation Haiti Relief Fund.
• Text "HAITI" to 25383 to donate $5 to the International Rescue Committee.
• Text "HAITI" to 85944 to donate $10 to the International Medical Corps.
Of course you can always donate any amount to the Red Cross at www.redcross.org.
Also, check with your job to see if the corporation will do matching donations -- the company I work for is matching colleague donations dollar for dollar. It made me feel really grateful and happy I work here.
Oh, and the next time I start getting myself riled up thinking about those crazypants people who shout "Death to America" and try to stuff explosives in their panties and blow up airplanes, I'm going to make myself focus instead on the mass of people in this world who give freely to help folks they have never met in a country they have likely never visited and may never see.
In my year of yes, I have decided I need to focus a whole lot more on the giving spirit and not nearly so much on the little faction of those whose spirit is programmed to take away. Truly the desire to alleviate suffering is so much stronger than the few people who want to create it.
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The news in Haiti is also a really good reminder to those of us who are fault-line-adjacent to make sure we have a plan and some supplies on hand ourselves. When I'm out and about this weekend I plan to pick up a case of bottled water, a few Lara bars and some extra pet food and write the date of purchase on the item, then stash it somewhere. You don't have to go overboard planning but a few flashlights, fresh batteries and some water will go a long way towards preparation.
If you work in an office and you wear high heels to work there is one thing you can do right now that will cost you no money at all: dig through your home closet and find an old pair of sneakers or loafers or comfortable shoes and put them in your bag and take them to work. Leave those shoes in your desk drawer.
Because I work in a high-rise building we have frequent fire drills. I know they're just drills, but the more ladies we have clopping down the stairs in their high heels the longer it takes to get outside and finish the drill. It's ridiculous how slowly the whole thing goes. In an earthquake there's glass everywhere so going barefoot may not be an option. Take five minutes this weekend to unearth an old pair of comfortable shoes and bring them to your job next week. So simple! So easy! You will feel so prepared.
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Have a great weekend!
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Edited to add (3:30 p.m.):
I know the methods of giving or donating above may not be your personal preferred method of giving and I appreciate that each person gives in the way that is best for them. You should do whatever feel right with your money, your time and your hair.
I just wanted to highlight how easy and simple it can be to donate $5 or $10 for those who may not have a lot in the bank right now to give. One thing I know for sure is that even when you have very little in your pocket, you still want to help when you can and I know from personal experience it may feel embarrassing to call some 1-800 number and try to give five or ten bucks. That's how I felt during Katrina, back then I was broke five ways to Sunday but still wanted to give anything I had. So how cool is it that you can give through a simple text message! Small amounts do add up, and technology has made it so much easier. I just got an email from a friend who said the texting campaign may have raised close to ten million dollars since Wednesday!
While there is a billing cycle (I guess this was on the news, too) of up to 90 days, the Red Cross isn't waiting 90 days to act. Like most charitable organizations I'm sure they project their incoming donations and send immediate aid based on projections of incoming cash flow. And all those texts are adding up, almost ten million dollars! That's amazing!
Just got this email from Annie T.:
I just donated to the Red Cross through my local grocery store (Lucky). They can add it right on to your grocery bill. Another easy way to give. The man behind me in line heard me donate, and so he did as well. That feels good.
Annie, that is so cool! Thanks for sharing that tip!
Also, I got so many nice notes today from people saying they were also surprised and happy hearing about the people all over the world willing to donate what they can to help and how it just makes you feel hopeful.
I could not agree more. Hope you all have a lovely weekend!
Posted by laurie at 08:27 AM
January 11, 2010
Sprouts and other kitchen things
After I wrote about my delicious roasted cauliflower last week, I got an email from a reader letting me know she'd made Brussels sprouts the same way with excellent results. I thought that was good info to have and filed it away in my above-neck computer.
I'm trying to get on a good schedule where I do grocery shopping on Saturday morning and then wash and scrub and clean and soak and chop any veggies I bought so that on Sunday I can do some cooking and assemble my meals for the week. The best way I know to get a handle on my health is to eat food I made myself. It's time-consuming, though, to cook all your meals. I keep reminding myself that this year getting healthy is my priority and you just make time for what's important. This is important to me, so that's how I found myself at the market Saturday morning browsing around the veggies and ran across a container of fresh Brussels sprouts. I picked them up and brought them home for a test drive.
Confession time: I have not eaten a Brussels sprout in probably 15 years. And I have certainly never cooked one. I washed them and let them dry and then sort of wondered what I had gotten myself into.
The ends of each sprout looked like they needed trimming, so I did that while I preheated the oven to 375 degrees. This oven seems to run a bit hot so I'm finding the best roasting setting is just below 400 degrees. The bigger sprouts got chopped in half while the tiny ones remained whole. I roughly chopped about four cloves of garlic (I LOVE garlic) and sprinkled them with salt, pepper, a little cayenne and a healthy dose of olive oil:
Put them on a foil-lined pan (I LOVE Reynolds Release, it's magic, and for someone who can burn anything it has been a lifesaver):
This is what they looked like after cooking for about 25 minutes:
And in the bowl, with some grated Parmesan cheese:
They weren't bad at all. The cauliflower is still my favorite, but this was tasty, especially the outer leaves which got a bit crispy. I might cook them a bit longer next time but I have to say, for my first home sprout experience it wasn't half bad.
The dish I made alongside the sprouts was chicken with baby onions from Epicurious.com. One of the things I love best about Epicurious is that you get the benefit of reading all the reviews and tips. So I carmelized the onions before adding the chicken and things were going great until I realized I had no chicken broth in the cupboard. Whoops! I just went ahead and cooked it all in wine (and my pan was smaller than maybe recommended so that was plenty of liquid) and all was going well until I got distracted with something else and slightly overcooked the chicken. It's a little dry but the taste is fantastic so I'll try this one again, this time with all the right ingredients. The caramelized onions added a delicious taste to the chicken. I served it on some brown basmati rice (and that's what I packed for lunch, too.)
Just realized I seem to talk a lot about food on Mondays! Guess that's what happens after you spend most of Sunday afternoon and evening in the kitchen. But I am so relieved knowing all my lunches are ready for the week and little snacks and I roasted a big pan of potatoes (which keep well in the fridge) to have with dinner later in the week. It is work, I won't deny it, but it's the only way to break the vicious cheeseburger loop I seemed to be caught in for most of 2009.
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You know what I was thinking about today? Since 9/11 things have changed so much at the airport that there's a whole generation of people now who probably don't remember that awesome feeling of having someone meet you at the gate. Remember that? Remember the wonderful, happy, giddy feeling you'd get knowing they'd be there so excited to pick you out of the crowd walking off the plane? And they won't get to know that sad goodbye, tearful, waving to someone as you walk down the jetbridge.
I'm still mad as hell at the stupid shoe bomber, who forever ruined the walk through security (the unsanitary aspects of walking where thousands of feet in questionable stages of cleanliness walk shoeless just skeeves me out) and now the underwear bomber will probably have us all getting felt up in the crotchal regions as we pass the TSA. And these are all unpleasant, depending on what the TSA agent doing the feeling-up looks like, but what I miss most of all is that awesome feeling of flying to see someone you missed so much and there they are at the gate, craning to see you get off the plane.
Meeting at baggage isn't quite the same.
Posted by laurie at 12:20 PM | Comments (105)
January 06, 2010
Coffee, the miracle elixir
It's a new year, but my body didn't get the memo. My sleep issues are boring and long-winded, I've had chronic insomnia for years and I have lots of ways of dealing with it but sometimes even when I do manage to fall asleep or even if I take an Ambien (like I did last night) I wake up in the middle of the night. There I am, just wide awake at 3:30 a.m. and nothing will get me back to sleep.
Sometimes I get up and write for a while or read or just watch TV but usually by 6 a.m. I am sleepy and ready for bed and that is disastrous, because if I fall asleep then I fall hard asleep and it's inevitable that I will be late for work and start the day behind schedule which makes me feel upside-down and backwards and grumpy from the very start.
I hate that feeling of falling behind before you even start the day!
This morning when I watched the clock pass from 3:30 to 3:35 to 3:38, I decided to get up and stay up. I wrote a little bit, read a little bit, petted the cats, flossed, made coffee, watched the weather. (I love watching the weather report, even though the most exciting thing we ever have is a little mist four times a year, I still must see the weather report!) I got dressed in track pants and a t-shirt and when it finally ticked away to 5 a.m. I put on my hoodie and fancypants new Nike shoes and went for a walk.
What a difference a cup of coffee makes! On Monday I shlubbed my way through a plodding, lumpy 30-minute walk and needed a nap midway through. Yesterday I slept right through my alleged walking time and took a lunchtime walk instead, just a little "exercise" to the mall. But today I was full of energy, walking almost like I wasn't the marshmallow I've become. Walking with my arms swinging and none of that slow walrus pace I had on Monday.
There are several people here at work who actually "work out" and do real exercise on a regular basis, so I consulted with one of them and she said she always tries to have a little cup of coffee before hitting the gym. How did I not know this secret until now? Amazing. I love coffee, and now I have another reason to adore it anew.
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I meant to take a picture of my shoes but I forgot. When I wear them I pretend I am someone who is spry and athletic.
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I have been fantasizing a lot about vacation, since it's the start of a new year and I get a whole new set of fresh, sparkling new vacation days. Usually I take a trip in January around MLK day and another in February around Valentine's Day but I think I'm going to hold off until later in the year to do any traveling. I love to think about vacation, though. I like to imagine packing a bag, walking out of the airport into a different city, getting a taxi, walking around and seeing the sights of some new place.
It's so weird that I love to stay home more than anything in the world, but I also love to randomly book a flight to someplace far away and just go. I would rather get on a plane and fly for 14 hours to some foreign country than to have to speak in a meeting or go to a party where I don't know people. Sometimes I get nervous and start sweating just from talking to my boss! But I can hail a taxi in Madrid or order wine in Poland. Funny.
I guess when I'm far from home there isn't a lot of social anxiety since I am not going to be seeing anyone from vacation again and they don't give me a performance review and I don't have to go to a party with them or work in an office beside them each day. You're kind of free on vacation. Free from your daily time constraints and free from worrying what people think about you.
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I have been knitting a bunch of things, but one is a present I haven't mailed yet and the other I'll post tomorrow, I just got pictures of the item on the recipient. Wait until you see that amount of goofy goodness. My mom had to do seamstress surgery on it to get it to fit (I have NO IDEA how she managed that) and it was kind of a Christmas miracle. Hint: it involves the dog. Too funny.
That's all for today. MORE COFFEE.
Posted by laurie at 08:38 AM
January 04, 2010
Hello, week. Hello, year.
Maybe I had the idea that 2010 would come and some magical switch would be flipped and I would feel positive and renewed and full of interest in things such as exercise and vegetables. Most of my fall/winter 2009 diet consisted on Funyuns and takeout so the bar was set pretty low in the progress department, yet still no magical switch-flip seemed to occur as I slept off my bottle of Veuve Clicquot into the new year.
One of the wisest things I have ever heard was about inspiration: you can't just wait around for inspiration to strike. Sometimes you have to take action and just start driving the bus in the right direction. After you get a move on, the inspiration will come. It is so true! If I sat around waiting to be inspired to make changes or write or clean house or do anything I would surely be waiting on my butt for a long time to come. So this is how I feel about the new year, I'm making a plan and taking some action instead of just waiting for another day to pass. I can hope to be better and all that, but hope is not a plan.
One thing I've had to do is get realistic about my schedule. Unless I make time on the weekends to go shopping and prepare food, my week devolves very quickly into poor eating choices (see: Funyuns). I just don't have time during the week to wash and peel and chop and marinate and cook and clean and prep and peel and simmer. Even with my smaller commute time I still have a serious drive each day and by the time I get home at night I want to flop over. Instead of complaining about this or beating myself up for once again being too tired after work to whip up something not from a box, I have just accepted my schedule. It is what it is. So I went grocery shopping and then I spent the weekend making all sorts of interesting things for my week. I shredded a huge pile of carrots for that carrot blueberry salad I love (also, the shredder tool on the food processor is the best invention! I love it!) and I roasted some beets to make a chilled beet salad:
Roasted beets. Delicious.
Before I moved to California I didn't realize that most non-Southern people have only eaten beets that come from a can. No wonder so many people hate beets! Fresh beets are delicious and sweet and earthy. It's very Southern to boil beets and then let them cool and slip off the skins. I prefer to roast them in a foil packet because it's so foolproof. Heat your oven to 400 degrees, put three beets in a foil package (I don't know why, but three seems to be the magic number) and seal it tightly. Put the foil on a cookie sheet and then cook them in the oven for about an hour, or if the beets are very large leave them for an hour and a half. Beets get all juicy when you cook them this way, so I always use a cookie sheet just in case (I hate to clean a mess in the oven, I truly do.) Then take the foil packet out of the oven and just let it sit until it cools. Once cool, open it up and the beet skins will slip right off, it's so easy.
I like beets sliced and dressed in a little vinaigrette. Add some goat cheese and toasted pine nuts and it's all fancy and yummy. There are so many things you can do with a cooked beet: add it to salad, mix it with sliced red onions and lettuce, toss it with a crunchy sliced Bosc pear and add lemon and olive oil.
Yesterday I also made THE BEST cauliflower ever. If you like cauliflower (I do, it's probably my favorite vegetable besides green beans) you will love this recipe -- Roasted Cauliflower (here's a basic version on epicurious.com.) The key to roasted cauliflower is to cut the pieces very small, about two inches or so. Also, I don't mince the garlic like the epicurious recipe calls for, but instead cut it roughly into pieces about 1/4 inch or just cut the cloves in half. Put the cut cauliflower in a bowl with the garlic, salt and pepper and olive oil. I add a little cayenne, too, and about half a fresh-squeezed lemon. Mix it up and spread it on a cookie sheet:
Then roast it in the oven on 400 degrees until it's browned on the outside. It seems to work best if you stir it up once or twice while cooking. Top with a little Parmesan cheese for the most amazing cauliflower ever:
I ate all of it.
Of course one cannot live on carrots and beets and cauliflower alone, so I cooked some chicken and brown rice and steamed some broccoli and then packed all my lunches and breakfasts and snacks for the week, which made me feel like I had already accomplished something monumental and it is only January 4th. I definitely did not feel deeply inspired when I started all that work, but when I finished and put the last dirty pan in the dishwasher and set it to run I felt this huge feeling of relief. Like I had gotten off to a good start.
By the way, that dishwasher has changed my life. I love it. It's better than a brand new car.
And when I got in to work today, I was thinking how I wished I had bought more lemons this weekend when I was at the store because I still have a whole bag of fresh cauliflower in the fridge and I want to make some more of that amazing crackass addictive roasted cauliflower. When I went to the breakroom to make a cup of tea I noticed some kind soul had brought in lemons from their tree to share with the group and now I have two of them resting happily in my purse, which I believe is a very good omen:
Lemons in my super-duper cheap but fabulous Target purse.
So that's Monday. No magical switch has flipped, but with a little effort and a good grocery shopping list I think I am at least turning the bus around and getting myself out of the ditch. That's enough for me.
Posted by laurie at 12:27 PM
December 31, 2009
Happy New Year 2010!
I hope your 2010 is happy, healthy, wealthy, delicious and covered in chocolate. Happy New Year!
xoxo
laurie and associates
(My associates)
Posted by laurie at 09:18 AM
December 29, 2009
New Year's Resolutions for a New Decade
Everyone around the office is conversationally asking, "So, what are your plans for New Year's Eve?" I don't really go out on New Year's Eve. There are plenty of reasons to stay in (the party-amateur drivers, the fact that I am a hermit, Dick Clark) but the main reason I don't make a big to-do over New Year's Eve is that it's not a big party holiday for me. I think it's probably my favorite holiday, but to me it's a very reflective day, very contemplative. You're marking the end of a calendar year and looking backwards and forwards. Because you're all flexible that way. Like the gal from the Exorcist, if only she'd been spewing resolutions instead of pea soup.
My plan for New Year's Eve is to stay home and commune with those in fur coats, cuddle up with that bottle of Veuve Cliquot I bought on sale at Ralph's ($20 off the regular price! Love you, Recession Alcohol Value Buys!) and call all my widespread friends and family members when it hits midnight in their time zones. I also enjoy watching that part of the nightly news where they show different countries ringing in the New Year.
Oh, and of course, there is list-making. And reflection.
Usually I make a hugeass long list of to-do items for my New Year's Resolutions. It's a hopeful wishlist of ways to improve my life, my outlook, my pants size, my future and my household cleaning routine. I love lists. This year, though, I have decided to dial down the Resolutions and make two very simple, over-arching goals for the year and all my other lists -- my to-do lists and to-read lists and to-clean lists -- will all just be the daily stuff that support my greater goals.
My 2010 Resolutions
1) Get really healthy
2) Come from a place of yes
So, the first goal is pretty self-explanatory. Some people lose weight and get all skinny and become marathon runners when writing their manuscripts. I do the exact opposite and marshmallow out. Since I am planning to have a mid-life crisis in 2011, I need to get into the best possible shape EVER so I can be foxy and wear cute clothes and not get out of breath on the way to my awesome ladycrisis escapades. Also, I believe it's probably a sign of some sort that I got exhausted just from going to the shoe store to purchase new tennis shoes for all the exercising I'm going to do in 2010.
Seriously, I broke a sweat trying on lace-up shoes.
On a side note, I found it funny how many people emailed me to say that 40 is not mid-life. I had no idea how many of ya'll were going to live to be 120 years old. I am impressed! More power to you!! Me, I am the one getting winded at the Lady Foot Locker so I'm keeping my expectations realistic. Plus, I still plan to take up smoking when I turn 60. But go with your bad self living to 120. I hope you wear any kooky thing you want and read trashy books all day and carry a dog around in a purse. That just sounds purely fun.
- - -
My other resolution is a little more nuanced: come from a place of yes.
This past year (especially toward the end of it) I had some moments when I was so carpy and negative even I didn't want to be around me. And I complained a lot, which is something I find I am naturally skilled at doing. It is my cardio, you know. And sometimes I can be quite amusing with my complaining. But there was some gradual crossing-over point when my good-natured griping became really annoying.
I really don't want to be that person. You know, the one you avoid because they're such a Debbie Downer. I hate that person! She emails me all the damn time! Always pointing out the stuff I am doing wrong, or should have done better, or how I am soon to meet a tragic end. Folks, I am determined not to be Debbie Downer. (I am also going to officially stop reading any negative emails or talking about them. I'm just going to delete at the first hint of crappiness. It's a mini-resolution. Delete! Delete!)
This "place of yes" resolution doesn't mean I pull a full Pollyanna and slap a happy sticker on everything. That behavior is deeply unimaginative, don't you think? And something about the relentlessly aggressive forced-positive approach to life just grates on me like sandpaper. It's so fake! It invalidates every real thing about the weird, wacky ups and downs of a true life. I like having different experiences and seeing all the colors of the rainbow and all that stuff. I just want to stop bitching about it so much.
So, in general, lay off the griping.
Coming from the yes place also does not mean saying yes to everything all the time. That would be "coming from the place of sure self-induced insanity." What it does mean is that I want to spend 2010 choosing to be upbeat, choosing to look for unexpectedly good outcomes, choosing to be hopeful, choosing to be friendly, choosing to believe the best in people and just letting go of the crap. Letting go of the nagging anxiety, the rote and chronic complaining, the irritating way I have of being able to see people's crappiest personality traits. I have a knack for seeing the devil within people... and I don't even mean to. This is handy when picking a boyfriend or a tax attorney, but not really useful at work where it's simply unproductive to harp on and on about That Person who is petty, jealous and mean-spirited. So what! They're a big steaming mess! Move on. They will still be a mess and yet you will not be paying them a whit of attention, and that is good.
Some people say it's all about being grateful (and that is true, too) but it's also about being less freaking fearful. Live it up a little! Stop looking for all the ways it won't work out and think of a few ways it will work out! That's who I want to be. Not pretending to be happy, but really choosing just to shrug off the icky and embrace an attitude of possibility.
When stuff happens -- which it does, that is the whole point of life -- instead of feeling anxious or worried or dwelling on the negatives, I'm going to give it up to the great cannoli in the sky, hope it all works out in some magical, unexpected way and go about my day. Not living in fear. Not expecting the worst. Not dreading stuff. Not making excuses. Not doing things I hate just because I feel obligated.
Wake up, say yes to the day, let it unfold, be a part of it, and choose the better-feeling thought (whatever that may be). Resist the temptation to point out people's petty behavior. Be forgiving of myself and others. Choose to believe people mean well. Choose to avoid people who are yucky. Don't take things so God-awful personally.
Take a leap of faith that things may end up better than you could ever expect.
- - -
So those are my resolutions. I have really good feelings about 2010. I am so ready for something different, and a new year is like a calendar re-boot. I am really grateful about many things that happened in 2009 but mostly I am glad it's over and we're on to something new! Maybe that's irrational. Or maybe that's me already strapping on my fancypants new running shoes and walking from the place of yes. Who cares! It's a new year, a new list, a whole new calendar of little blocks that could contain something - anything - great.
Are you happy 2009 is almost over and 2010 is coming? Am I the only one here who feels relieved? What are your New Year's Resolutions? I love hearing other people's lists. I love to hear your New Year's plans, too. (Comments are open for a bit.) (Look at me coming from the yes place on comments! hee.)
And most of all thank you for visiting with me every day, even though I got a little bit cranky and unfocused and marshmallowy. I will probably still complain about traffic because that is one of life's great pleasures, but I do hope to lobotomize my inner Debbie Downer for the year ahead.
xoxo
laurie
Posted by laurie at 09:03 PM | Comments (289)
December 28, 2009
All the vampires walkin' through The Valley move west down Ventura Boulevard
For my 40th birthday I have decided to have a mid-life crisis. I don't turn 40 for quite a while, I don't even turn 40 in 2010, but I am a planner and that gives me plenty of time to come up with something awesome for my crisis. Move to Spain and herd sheep? Get all-over liposuction? Have everything botoxed into perpetual stillness? Laser hair removal? Cabin in the woods manifesto writing? Move the cats and my shoes into an RV and drive around the country? There is so much opportunity for a midlife meltdown makeover. I am really looking forward to it. I am making a list of all the things I want to do between now and 40 and there's all kinds of crazy stuff on it. Lord only knows what my Midlife Crisis List may contain.
Making lists is just part of December. This is by far my favorite time of the year: the end of it. This is when all the crud and muck and shlub of days gone by gets wrapped up and shrugged off as "last year" and you get to move on and think about the shiny, happy unknown future which is "Next Year." Next Year can bring anything, and it might be good! You could win the lottery, meet a sexasaurus, get a fantastic haircut, lose weight, travel to someplace great, floss.
Anything can happen Next Year!
Even though I try hard to stay in the present sometimes the present is anxiety-causing or dull or full of traffic, so I tend to drift off into the future. I worry I am living a lot more in the future than right now, but that makes me anxious so I fantasize that in the future this will not be a problem.
I'm pretty excited about my future midlife crisis. I don't have a lot of tethers so who knows where I could float off to. Pull a Hemingway and write all day, drink all evening, fight the Spanish Civil War, go fishing in the Keys, have some six-toed cats. I'm not really that fond of boats but I might get on one anyway. Or at least a canoe. Or maybe a surfboard with a sail on it.
Maybe I will cut off all my hair or get those really thick bangs or buy a small watermelon farm in ... uh... somewhere watermelons grow, or I'll rescue goats. As surely goats need rescuing!
There are so many options! And I have time to make lists and lists and more lists. I feel I am very ready for a midlife crisis, I'm not really deeply committed to anything except TV and Magic Erasers, I'm not sure where I am exactly on my personal progress spectrum and it's been a weird, wacky year for the entire world. This is the ideal breeding ground for a real go off-the-rails out-of-the-box leap of crazypants.
As it is list time, I'm also working on my New Year's Resolutions, many of which are carryovers from 2009's list since I don't think I really accomplished much. I did write a book, but I'm not sure it's any good. I did travel a little, and write a bunch of stuff here online though not as often as I wanted. I sat in traffic a lot. I moved into a gorgeous new apartment, but sort of as an F-you to the gardeners who I doubt are really missing me. I made two baby sweaters!! Real sweaters, and also baby shoes, I do feel that was an accomplishment. Oh, and entrelac. Frankly I may put "entrelac" down as a skill on my resume I'm so proud of it.
I gave in to my hermit tendencies more than ever before, largely explained as "I'm working... sorry... can't leave the house..." and I enjoyed it, which I can't tell if that's a good thing or a bad thing. I completely lost the battle of the bulge and gained more weight instead of losing more, which was a bummer. I worked on a project at work that was really challenging and turned out great, and that was a good feeling. I got my first ever traffic ticket and did traffic school online, also known as "eight hours I can never get back." I started picking my battles more carefully, which was a nice change, and I totally opted out of the Recession Doom And Gloom which was the best choice I made all year.
But still in the end I feel like I didn't do much in 2009. In 2010 I want to be more active in my own life, but I haven't really defined what that means. Which brings us back to the Midlife Crisis, because all that stuff you wish you had the guts to do but are too afraid to do? I think a Midlife Crisis is the perfect time to try them out! Unlike a male midlife crisis which is so silly and predictable, I think my ladycrisis is going to be far more adventurous and zeitgeisty and run-off-to-Australia-and-recreate-The-ThornBirds, you know? Men have no imagination. And, besides, I already have a red convertible!
Posted by laurie at 09:37 AM
December 22, 2009
Tuesday Five
Weird things I saw downtown this morning:
Guy walking across Spring Street in a dress and cowboy boots. Two armed guards with their guns drawn (!!) on Flower Street. Whole crew of guys on the Temple off-ramp from the 101 cleaning up what looked like all the fallen palm tree branches in the city congregating in one spot.
Weather
I hear that in other parts of the country people are having "snow" and "blizzards" and "ice." I have seen that stuff before on TV, like in the claymation movies all about Christmas and it looks sweet and fluffy. Out here we're having a hard winter! First, it was sunny and 80 degrees all weekend and I was low on sunscreen. Then, it got inhospitably cold overnight and today we're only going to see 60 degrees as a high temperature! How will we survive? And there is wind! (See: downed palm tree fronds, above.) My hair got messed up on the walk from the parking garage to my building and there were leaves blowing around. I was able to wear a scarf, though, the one upside of the harsh Los Angeles winter.
Santa Hat
Our office manager gave me a Santa Hat this morning and I want to wear it but I tried to put it on and my head is too big. Has my head swelled with knowledge or is this hat meant for small-headed people? Is it my ginormous forehead? Have I gained weight in my head, too? Depressing concept. Moving on.
Twitter, and then complaining
I am not sure I get the concept. I mean, I have a Twitter thingy and sometimes I write stuff, but since I never cook anything worth writing about and since even my shortest thoughts are two paragraphs long the whole thing seems like an exercise in self-editing, something I fail at miserably already. Interestingly enough, Twitter and Facebook (something I am not doing at all) are totally 100% available through our corporate firewall and yet Netflix has been blocked. Not just the "watch instantly" portion (that was blocked, and reasonably so, but you used to be able to still see your movie queue and re-arrange it) but now the entire site is blocked. So... let me get this straight. It's OK with the corporate security people for employees to spend all day on Facebook -- which they do -- but it's not OK for me to re-arrange my movie queue for six minutes on my lunch break once a week? GO FIGURE.
Noises, creaky
The building is making these creaky noises and I can't tell if it's from the wind or if we're having a mild earthquake. Which reminds me, to all those people who made fun of me for drinking instant coffee guess which one of us will be happily caffeinated during the next Big One while your Starbucks is closed? I can boil water on a gas grill and drink my Nescafe Clasico even if the power is off for two weeks... you and your fancy coffee snob preferences will be knocking on my door for some of that Nescafe love...
- - -
That's all for today. I'm grumpy but not sure why. Maybe it's because I want to be home drinking my instant coffee and re-arranging my movie queue! Ah, the jet-setting life of the single gal.
Posted by laurie at 11:26 AM
December 18, 2009
Hot off the press....
Apparently my publisher printed the book early and shipped it off and so the tome of absurdity which is Home Is Where the Wine Is
My publicist did an interview Q&A with me earlier this week, this was the first question:
KW: The cover of your book has another pair of sexy legs in high heels. Are those your legs? LP: No. Have you seen me? We had to go with stunt legs.
(One day I aspire to have the legs from my book covers.)
So, this is the scary part -- knowing it's out there and waiting and hoping that the words on the page make people laugh and praying with divine fervor that folks don't hate it but if they do they politely refrain from telling you as much. And of course if it's really a turd we'll all just make jokes about it later.
Jokes! Comedy! Stunt legs! Ah, let the weekend begin.
Posted by laurie at 06:54 AM
December 16, 2009
Holiday party nerves mitigated only by the cold that will not die.
Tomorrow is the holiday party.
Every year we have a holiday "party" at work and every year I see it for what it truly is: another opportunity for me to get nervous and in my attempts to seem like I'm normal I overtalk and say truly godawful inappropriate things for which I may possibly get fired for later. Rock on!
When I worked in the newspaper business or in entertainment, holiday parties weren't these scary things where work mixes with socialness in a confused jumble. At my previous jobs the holiday party was a big Saturday night drunkfest. One year the advertising director of a certain entertainment company showed up at our Christmas party with two hookers and a bottle of tequila. One year when I was at the Daily News the reporters burned editor-in-chief D.B. in effigy and then later I drunkenly propositioned someone from the city desk ... it was all in good fun. Somehow I lost a shoe.
Here, at Big Corporation, Inc., the "party" is held during the middle of the day and you come back to work right after. It's like a long lunch with drink tickets. Except this is an extremely business professional environment, so there's a very fine line on the drinking plus you're still technically at work and on the clock so you want to be sure you still have your work face on. I have a hard enough time keeping a lid on my mouth while I'm here just working, adding in a veneer of socializing can be disastrous for someone like me. Meaning someone who has a limited ability to filter combined with a brain that says things like, "You know in France they're just called fries. And what do you think they call the good plates in China?"
Usually I manage to say something really inappropriate that makes whoever I'm talking to need to take an urgent phone call, then I sweat until it's time to come back to work.
I had no idea until I came to work here what a business professional environment was like. I'd always worked in deeply dysfunctional newsrooms and later, equally screwed up entertainment companies. The parties were fun but in that way it's fun when the lunatics start running the asylum. Here, the day-to-day is so much nicer, people are pleasant and respectful and no one swears or throws things at you and no one is crying in the bathroom stalls. The dress code is much stricter and I have to monitor my trucker's mouth, but for the most part it's really nice. So the holiday party seems like a bizarre thing to be the most stressful event of my year, but there you have it. It's a two-hour landmine in which I try desperately to not say anything that will make people shun me back at the office.
Luckily (or otherwise) I've been unable to shake this horrible cold and my voice is raspy and it hurts to talk so maybe I'll run out of steam before I get wound up. And to keep from having to carry along a backpack of Kleenex I'll be downing some cold medicine before the party which will hopefully make me too drowsy to say ridiculous things, like last year when I told an SVP that he had "junk in the trunk and gold in the hold." As you can imagine, he had to take an immediate important call... away from me.
Kind of makes you long for the days when your boss showed up with a couple of hookers and some tequila.
Posted by laurie at 06:28 PM
December 15, 2009
There'll be parties for hosting, marshmallows for toasting ...
This year everyone in my group at work decided that instead of buying gifts for each other we'd adopt a family. We actually got the idea from Work-Jennifer, I was asking her what she usually does for co-worker gifts in her group and she told me they'd stopped doing that years ago and now they all adopt a local family and make Christmas for them instead and I thought this was brilliant! After all, I'm not sure anyone in my group is going to just keel over if they don't get yet another Starbucks gift card.
And now most of the loot is collecting in my office and we're all going to wrap presents tomorrow at lunchtime.
Usually I buy giftcards for my own family members, so I haven't done real Christmas shopping -- picking out presents and goodies -- probably since I was married. OMG SO MUCH FUN. Corey and I both picked the little girls in the family and so I got to buy pink clothes and girly shoes and TOYS! And most of all, I got to buy The Head:
Every woman near my age in this office has walked by my open door and seen The Head and swooned, because we all remember being kids in the 70s and wanting The Head. I never had one as a child, but apparently the love endures because even these 30-odd years later I keep looking at it and it makes me happy. The moment I saw it in Target I knew that one little girl would spend Christmas morning combing The Head's hair and putting on her play makeup and changing out her bows and barrettes. There were actually two versions of The Head at Target (the other one was Barbie Wedding Day Head) and for a minute there in the pink aisle it was Sophie's Choice, WHICH ONE? HOW TO CHOOSE? But since the little girl on my list said she specifically liked Princess stuff, I went with the Belle Head.
For a brief moment I considered buying one for myself on Saturday but I can't think of anything I want to be less than a woman living alone with a bunch of cats playing dress-up with Barbie Head. You know?
Still, I have enjoyed having it on my desk for a few days....
Posted by laurie at 11:11 AM
December 04, 2009
Missives from Kleenex City
I'm home today because I have a cold. Unlike the people who come to work and sneeze and snortle and infect us all with their germy germs, I am staying home to lie in bed and try not to cough and read books and drink hot tea. I just had a tea made from a weird combination that Corey got me started on. It's a little too mastercleansy for me, but every now and then it does hit the spot. Juice a few lemons, add cayenne pepper and some finely grated ginger. (I keep my ginger root in the freezer and then grate it, frozen, on the small side of a box grater. Works great.) Add honey and hot water to make a tea.
By the way, the most emails I got this week were from shocked (shocked!! I tell you!!) readers from Australia and the UK and Ireland and Europe who were curious how Americans heat water if they don't have electric kettles. I wonder how many suffered mild heart attacks when I answered back that many of us heat the water in a kettle on the stove but some - gasp - heat it in the microwave. heh. State secrets exposed!!
Of course I am using my shiny, happy electric kettle today:
I'm trying to decide if I should bring it upstairs and just plug it in here in the bedroom and just resolve not to leave my bed all day. Especially with all the awesome book and TV recommendations from yesterday, thank you!! We'll have to make that a regular thing, it was too fun. And it's sometimes hard for hermits such as myself to find other people to talk about knitting, books, TV and movies with.
Speaking about movies, Jen and I did not end up going to see "2012" last night, she was working late lawyering and I wasn't feeling well so it was probably best. But I still want to see it. And I can't wait to see "Up In The Air" because I love George Clooney and I am also one of those crazy airmiles people. It is all about the miles.
But today it is all about the Kleenex and the hot tea.
Have a great weekend!
Posted by laurie at 08:55 AM
December 03, 2009
Book soup
Let's talk books!
I'm on a reading kick lately, which is strange since I have also been on an insane TV binge. But I haven't been sleeping much and my manuscript is done and shipped off so I guess I am making up for lost time, catching up on TV and books and even laundry. Yesterday I was trying to convince my friend Corey to watch the new season of "Hoarders" with me and she refused.
Corey: I don't have time to watch TV! I have a five year old at home.
Me: You need Tivo. It will change your life. You can watch TV much more efficiently, especially if you have insomnia like me. I love TV.
Corey: You're a TVaholic!
Me: I am!
Corey: You're addicted to TVahol!
So, yes, I am addicted to TVahol. I didn't used to be, I didn't grow up watching TV at all. But I love my shows, what can I say. Hoarders, Oprah, CSI(x3), Castle, Glee, The Closer, and I've even somehow got sucked into that show with Christian Slater, "The Forgotten." It will probably get canceled -- every year I pick one or two new shows to watch and every year they get canceled. The fact that Castle had a season two shocked the pants off me.
In addition to mainlining TV, I also love reading. Right now I am on an Ann Patchett binge since reading The Magician's Assistant
Corey recommended Olive Kitteridge
A few weeks ago I mentioned that in honor of the swine flu paranoia, I was re-reading the best flu apocalypse love story good-vs-evil epic narrative ever written:
THE STAND
I was so excited to get emails from other Stand-fans and lovers of Stu Redman. In the movie based off the book, Stu was played by Gary Sinise so now when I read the book he's Gary Sinise mixed with the Stu I imagined all those years ago when I first read the book as a teenager. And he is sexy. One of my emailers and I were chatting back and forth about the book and I mentioned Stu Redman was the perfect man and she said:
"Yeah, that's how you know it's fiction -- that's the only place to find one of those!"
That about cracked me up ass over teakettle. I laughed all day thinking about that.
I love survivalist stories and end-of-the-world the-apocalypse-is-coming fiction. (And movies! Jen and I are going to see "2012" tonight which will be the first movie I have seen in years because, you know, busy busy and also ... hermity. But it is about the end of the world! Must see!) My fascination with giant disaster movies and post-apocalyptic books is strange because in my real life I am ridiculously good at not worrying about worst-case scenarios at all. I am very relaxed about what I cannot control in real life (mostly) but I do love a good end of days survival story. Got any recommendations?
After I finish Bel Canto I may start in on another Ann Patchett (I get like this with authors, I find one I like and want to read everything!) or I may have to move over to one of the selections in this pile:
I am so excited that so many of my friends online are out there getting their work published and this is a whole stack of books just out from people I know! I am so happy for them, it's like the doors just keep on opening and opening. I love it.
Unclutter Your Life in One Week
Erin Doland is the lovely editor-in-chief of one of my favorite all-time blogs, Unclutterer. Her book is coming at the right time... after moving and unpacking (mostly) I need all the help I can get, so I am excited to dive into it.
How to Knit a Love Song: A Cypress Hollow Yarn
Rachael Herron is the author of yarnagogo.com and the friend who invited me to guest post at PensFatales.com. This is the first of three fiction books that have yarn and romance and suspense all wrapped up together and I think she's a talented writer and I only wish I had a plane ride coming up soon, because it's just the sort of book you want to read uninterrupted for hours on a plane.
Crazy Lace:an artistic approach to Creative Lace Knitting
Myra Wood, one of the talented designers who provided patterns for my upcoming book (because a whole set of patterns from me would be a lot of scarves, you know?) anyway, Myra has a beautiful and colorful new book out all about lace. The pictures of the projects are just gorgeous!
Sword of the Slave
Eric Thompson is off writing an entire world of fantasy and swordfights starting with Sword of the Slave. Fantasy writers kind of mystify me... even my fiction stuff is autiobiographicalish, so I can't imagine making up a whole world!
- - -
So much good stuff to read! If only we all got to stay home all day and read books while our trust funds collected more golddust... ah, that's the life.
And finally, do you ever get the deep sudden need to re-read an old favorite book you've read 100 times already just so you can sink back into it for a while? I was telling someone the other day how I was shocked to see when I moved just how many books I have... and they are heavy going up three flights of stairs! She asked why I didn't just get rid of my books. I know there are many I could pare down, but how to choose? I love my books like old friends. The ones I re-read the most often are probably Timeline
So I thought I would open comments for a few hours on this topic so we can all chat about favorite books and movies and being TVaholics. What are you reading? Did you love The Magician's Assistant, too? Is anyone else watching The Forgotten but me? Is anyone else as obsessed with Hoarders? I have to go clean something right after I watch it. But also my heart breaks for those folks. And how many people are now reading The Stand in preparation of getting the swine flu?
Posted by laurie at 10:12 AM | Comments (273)
December 02, 2009
Stuff I Like Addendum
Yesterday I forgot to include a very important item on my Stuff I Like List. (Previous lists here and here.)
Best Inexpensive Thin Sweater -- Perfect For Traveling!
Target Mossimo sweaters. Last year when I went to London in November I wrote that I packed just my thin layering sweaters, a few T-shirts and pants and I was set. I got those sweaters at Target for such an amazingly inexpensive price, so I got them in every color and wore them to death but by the time I told you about them Target had removed them from the inventory online because I couldn't find them for you. Well, they're back online and they are currently on sale!
These sweaters are so comfortable and great for casual stuff and look great dressed up, too. You can even wash and dry them right in the machine and they hold up pretty well -- and for $15 they're a steal! Here's the basic black, red and brown and they have it in plus sizes, too: plus size black, red and brown. They have other colors available online, just browse around for more options. Here is a link to all Target sweaters, too, in case you want to browse everything.
I am one of those people who can get hot in a blizzard, so I like traveling to cold places but I need to do it in thin layers so I can peel down like an onion when I start getting hot. I get really grumpy and short-fused when I'm overheated, it's one of the little charming quirks about my personality ... anyway, I have learned to dress to suit my personal climate and adjust as needed. Thin sweaters are the best! Just enough to layer over a thin T-shirt and they pack well because they aren't bulky. And you can still fit into your coat when you're wearing them. I have them in every color.
I do not look this skinny in my skinny sweater.
Posted by laurie at 11:09 AM
December 01, 2009
More happy things I like
Sometimes I like to blather on about stuff I like. My previous Stuff I Like lists are here and here. That was all I could find. I tried searching the archives but I have a LOT of archives. Who wrote all that stuff? Geez.
By the way, no one pays me to talk about products. (Sadly. hah) I am originally from a newspaper background and I find it totally bizarre and unethical that people would get paid to review items or receive free items and not disclose that information. Anything that is advertising is clearly over there on the sidebar as an advertisement. Love you, blogads! Anyway, I just list things I like. The end.
- - -
Best Bargain Hair Conditioner
Pantene Pro-V Beautiful Lengths Hair Conditioner
I have long, very fine hair that tangles like crazy and will break off in the middle of a sentence for no good reason at all. I also live in a climate with 2% humidity so I need a very thick conditioner! I love the Kerastase products
Best Green Veggie From A Box
Cascadian Farms organic green beans with almonds
I love these green beans. I put them in a saucepan with a little olive oil and sprinkle on some garlic powder and cook them until they're unrecognizable (Southerners love green beans cooked to death, I never realized it was a cultural thing until I moved out here.) And these beans taste so much better than any others I have ever found, canned or frozen. One day I flipped over the box and read the label and found out why -- they have a little sugar and salt on them. Sneaky! But so so tasty.
My closest Ralph's doesn't carry these and Whole Foods stopped carrying them a while ago, so in a pinch I buy bagged, frozen organic French cut green beans at Whole Foods and cook them to death (really, the secret is cooking them in olive oil and adding garlic powder, or garlic salt if the beans are unsalted and just cooking forever) and then adding my own almonds. It works fine but the all-in-one boxed kind are the best. Must be the sugar.
Most Addictive Lip Balm Ever
Carmex Stick lip balm
It works great and I always have it in my purse. It even has sunscreen!
Favorite Travel Widget
SeatGuru.com
It's not really a widget, it's a service. But if you're getting on an airplane, get thee to SeatGuru fast! You can find your flight's make and model on your reservation, then look it up on SeatGuru to find the best (and worst) seat assignments.
Most Used Most Awesome Kitchen Gadget
The electric kettle!! Ubiquitous in European kitchens, the electric kettle is the best invention in hot water since the flame. I don't know why Americans haven't embraced the electric kettle, though. It's a mystery.
The one I have is the Aroma 1-1/2-Liter Kettle
I use my kettle every day, the water heats up super fast and I love that it's not sitting on the stovetop getting grody. I don't make a whole pot of coffee each morning, I make one cup of tea or I make instant coffee. Yeah, I know, you're writhing on the floor in pain at the mention of instant coffee, but I like it and if you buy quality coffee it tastes just fine. I have it on very good authority that the French often drink instant in their own homes so move past your indignation that I drink instant and focus it instead on the idea of the French drinking instant coffee!
Best Book I've Read In A While
The Magician's Assistant
A woman at work brought this in for me to read and she was right, it was a perfect book for me. For one thing, the main character loves Los Angeles. And it's a character story, a lovely, small, perfect character story. I bought a copy for myself, my mom and my friend Corey. I love to buy books for people, especially good books like this one. I love good books.
- - -
Finally, I got an email from a reader asking me about my Asus eeePC -- she was about to go on a trip overseas and had recently purchased one for the vacation, and asked if I had trouble typing on it and she said hers did not fit in her handbag and she had some issues with it. And she didn't think her friends or family had skype and she wasn't sure it was all worth it and was thinking of returning it.
I know I have talked up my rockin' little netbook (here's an entry where I yammer on about it), it's so small and was so inexpensive! I couldn't believe they made anything so tiny that actually worked:
But I bought my netbook a few years ago and a lot has changed since then. Now almost every computer brand makes one and they have gotten bigger and better. More keyboard space, more battery life, and still very affordable and portable. The eeePC I have is a very early version, it has a teetiny screen and an infinitesimal keyboard and runs on Linux. (I do not want to check email or work while I'm on vacation and the small keyboard was never a problem for me.) The battery life is limited, about an hour or two. The touchpad buttons are clunky.
Having said all of that it was the first computer I had ever seen that was so small, came in cute colors and was both sturdy and affordable! Unlike my "real" laptop, I had no fear taking it all over the world and plugging it into suspect power outlets or accidentally dropping it in the TSA line or having it banged a bit in the suitcase.
However, the new crop of netbooks are as varied and full-featured as the regular laptop market. Travel + Leisure magazine recently ranked their favorite new travel gadgets and listed many new, slick-looking netbooks:
• Sony VAIO W 10.1" Netbook - Up to 7 Hours of Battery Life (Windows 7)
• Toshiba Mini NB205 10.1" Netbook - 9 Hours of Battery Life (Windows 7)
• ASUS Eee PC 1008 10.1" Netbook - 6 Hour Battery Life (Windows XP)
• HP Mini 110 10.1" Netbook - Up to 8 Hours of Battery Life (Windows 7)
• Lenovo S10-2 10.1" Netbook - Up to 6 Hours of Battery Life (Windows 7)
(Check out the cute floral options)
Please note I have not tried any of these computers myself. But the netbook concept in general is a favorite thing and this list alone should give you an idea of how outdated my 8-inch, 1-hour battery life Linux model is. There's a world of options available now! Netbooks galore can be had for under $400 and with a lot more bells and battery juice.
As for the skype question, when I am traveling I use skype to stay in touch with people but they don't need the software. I just put in a few bucks of credit on my skype account and I can call anyone's cellphone or landline for uber-cheap, around two cents a minute. (You can also use skype on your iphone if you're in a wifi hotspot, I have not tried this yet.)
Having said all of this, I wouldn't buy a netbook just for a single trip abroad. And especially not a trip to Europe where you can often duck into an internet cafe. Your hotel may even offer a computer in the lobby for guest use.
I bought my netbook because I knew I was going to be traveling fairly frequently, I did not at the time have an iphone, I knew I would be traveling alone and would want to call home and I knew I would want it for entertaining myself on the plane and in the airport lobbies of the world. A friend of mine at work loaded a ton of movies and TV shows onto an external drive for me (please do not email me asking how to do this as I have no idea and am of no help at all) and now I can watch videos when I travel. It has been most useful as a phone, though -- using skype through the hotel wifi to track down lost luggage in France, make changes to a tour in Rome, reschedule my flight in Maui. I used it as a handy research tool to find train schedules and opening hours at restaurants and yarn shops.
Could I have traveled without it? Absolutely. But it has been handy and helpful and I like it and it has probably paid for itself in phone bill savings alone. Several years ago my luggage went to Morocco and I went to Paris and it took HOURS of calls to get that figured out. That's when I started packing a carryon bag.
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Ok, that's my list for today. Happy anti-recessioning! After all, when you're saving $25 on hair conditioner, it adds up and you can buy that netbook of your dreams. Or lots and lots of green beans.
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Updated to add: Because of the hungry ducks pecking at every little thing on this planet I am updating this post to be VERY CLEAR that YES of course I have an amazon.com affiliate account and YES of course I put it in my amazon.com links. You should do it, too, because when you buy your own stuff from amazon.com you get a small percentage back. That is the main reason I do it, because I shop there. For what it's worth I make about four bucks a year from it. NO, it is not a paid endorsement. A paid endorsement is when someone who makes a product pays you to endorse the product. For example, if Magic Eraser paid me to review the product, I would tell you. They do not. (Again, so sad, they could just pay me in Magic Erasers and I would die happy. I love them.)
I also provide amazon.com links AND many other store links when I can find them because if not I get eleventy eight hundred emails asking where to buy something. I just think it's convenient to do the link for you. I am now reconsidering this and all writing of any kind ever because of the aforementioned hungry pecking ducks.
According to my lawyer, as pertains to ME ONLY, because I am not giving you legal advice, because unlike many people I realize I am not a lawyer and do not pretend to know law things, a link to a store that has a flat fee on anything purchased is not a paid endorsement unless I guess you're being paid the percentage just to review their online store. No, I am not in violation of the FTC rules as it has been explained to me by my legal professional explainer. If the FTC visits me you will be the first to know. I will take pictures. If you have issues or concerns of your own please consult a lawyer. If you are not a lawyer, please do not fear, there is probably one standing next to you in the grocery store.
Also, WTF with email people? Yesterday it was people sending me long detailed history lessons about the geopolitical status of Romania and today it's everyone's day to play lawyer?
Can we just have a standing assumption that I already know something I said no matter how small or useless or made-up or silly or joking will somehow someway offend someone and we can just all assume I know it, and therefore you can save the email? I am just suggesting is all.
Posted by laurie at 01:43 AM
November 27, 2009
Black Friday
My sister-in-law woke up at 3 a.m. to be ready to hit the mall with some of her friends when the stores opened at 4 a.m. I always wondered who was off shopping at a mall at 4 a.m. and now I know, it's my sister-in-law!
I prefer to do my shopping the hermit's way: online, in my pajamas, with a glass of wine. I have furnished my house almost entirely from shopping online, I buy my clothes online, my books, shoes. I love the UPS man, the FedEx lady, the reliable ol' U.S. Postal Service.
Speaking of the postal service, I wrote a little guest post about holiday letters over at PensFatales.com. Unlike horrible, mean curmudgeony me, the lovely ladies of PensFatales allow comments, so comment away! Carry on my wayward son, there'll be peace when you are done.
As for me, I'm at work, waiting for the end of the day and for the weekend to officially begin with pajamas and wine and maybe some shopping of my own -- from the safety of my living room of course. Have a great weekend!
Posted by laurie at 11:05 AM
November 25, 2009
Happy Thanking Day!
Happy Thanksgiving! And day-before-Thanksgiving! Especially to the servicemen and women who read from half a world away.... I don't know how you put on fatigues each day a million miles away from home and do your work and still find the muster to endure yet more blabbering about my exciting life (cat poop! gardening trauma! the great and ongoing discussion of whether or not I should wear bangs!) but I appreciate my readers in uniform and thank you for checking in and emailing and for doing a job I'm too chicken to do but appreciate more than I can say.
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Lately I have spent a ridiculous amount of time feeling anxiety over the next book and all which that entails, and even though I know it's a high-class problem to have and all that, there is still anxiety, a sucking pit of acid pooling in my stomach. It reminds me that all change (even good change) can cause stress. I've never been one who thinks that just because someone somewhere else has it worse your problems should miraculously vanish or become unimportant, but I do try to get out of my own head from time to time. Finding things to be thankful about always helps.
Jennifer and I went through a period of time where we'd email each other three things a day. Three happy things or stuff we were thankful for. We haven't done it in a while but it was funny how something so simple could make you pause from your constant brainchatter -- even just for a few minutes -- and focus on just looking for good things. It changes your mood.
Of course I feel grateful for my family and friends and that I am alive and employed and my cats are healthy and my car isn't making mysterious noises and I have so much, I even have a second a book to worry about. Today, though, my top three are:
1) My little circle of female friends, who I love and admire and respect and learn so much from. I've never been one of those people with 200 best friends, I've always kept a very small group, and now as an adult I feel even more grateful for the smart and funny women I know and feel close to. They give me perspective, they give me laughs, they give me a reality check when I need it, they show me their lives and share their stories with me. They make my life feel full and happy.
1a ) Drew. We're both 12th house Cancers. And he doesn't fall into my close-girlfriend zone being as he is a dude and all but he's my speed-dial for therapy, advice and daydreaming. If I called Drew today and told him I was buying a ruin in Spain and moving there to herd sheep, he'd offer to help me pack. He'd help decorate. He'd help name the sheep. He goes with me on my wild flights of fantasy and that is a true friend indeed.
2) Readers. All readers, not just folks who read here but people who read books and buy books and walk out of the library with a stack. Reading is the cheapest and fastest way I know to get out of my head and into a whole new world. I love swapping books with people and getting book recommendations and most of all I just love others like me who know they're never alone as long as they have a book. With a book I can go places, you know? I can lie in bed or sit on the subway or just curl up on the sofa with a book and I am somewhere else, it's magic.
3) My job. Obviously one day I want to be less Walter Mitty and more J.K. Rowling and I will never give up that dream. Until then, however, I still have bills to pay and like to eat (a lot) and my job has been a solid spot in a crazy year. 2009 has been a wild ride in the world of finance and I know how lucky I am to be employed and especially how lucky to be employed at a place I genuinely like! This year I got to work on a project that was very detailed and complex and time-consuming and challenging and it was the best project I've done in all the time I've worked here and I feel ridiculously proud of it. The whole team was smart and hardworking and I think it made what could have been a difficult year much happier for me, more fulfilling. A lot of other stuff was not going so well, but instead of harping on the icky parts I just focused deeply on the project I liked.
Sometimes I find I have to look for the one thing that is going right and focus intently on it until all the crappy stuff begins to lose its importance, lose its grasp on me. That's what I did at work this year and it made me happier about coming in each day. And for that I am well and truly thankful.
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That's my three for today. Hope that wherever you are and whatever you're doing for Thanksgiving you're happy and full and that you have a good book picked out for later.
xo
laurie
Posted by laurie at 11:40 AM
November 16, 2009
It's scarf weather until at least 10 a.m.
One thing I love about the Valley is that it gets cold in the mornings. It's only 52 degrees outside right now! That's downright wintery for us.
I have a stomach ache. I ate too many tortilla chips last night. Or maybe it was the salsa. Either way, I fear there may be spewing. I hate to throw up more than anything else so I may be able to avoid it by sheer force of will. This is how my morning is unfolding so far, and it does not bode well for the day ahead.
So here are my three good things:
1) With all the H1N1 flu news I thought this was a good time to re-read The Stand by Stephen King
2) Christmas decorating. I got my tree put together on Saturday but haven't decorated it yet. My wreath from the past few years is still pretty so I hung it on the front door and already I feel the holiday cheer.
3) Netflix. I know, I know, I resisted for so long. Then I gave in and I have become an addict. I like being able to watch shows streaming online, that's by far my favorite part of the service. That's how I got into The Office and Dexter and caught up on last season's 30 Rock. I love TV, I will not lie to you.
So that is Monday. I am wearing a scarf. I am trying not to barf. I rhyme! Good times.
Posted by laurie at 07:11 AM
November 13, 2009
Friday the 13th and then just some blabbering
As superstitious as I am, I'm not really that interested in Friday the 13th. Though I won't fly on a Friday the 13th, so I guess I do still have my little trepidations. Not that I am flying anywhere.
Many months ago I posted a link to this video:
The first time I saw it, it made me go into the ugly cry. You know that part where everyone suddenly starts to come down the stairs and sing? I just started sobbing like a weirdo.
At first I couldn't figure out why that was my reaction. And I got a lot of email from people telling me the same thing happened to them. It took a while, but finally it dawned on me that most of the time we're so disconnected from pure joy that it's a shock to the system to feel a rush of it. Pure joy makes us leak at the eyeballs.
I've learned a lot from the email I get, it's been by far the most interesting and thought-provoking part of all this. I get emails all day every day. Most of them are lovely, happy, goofy, funny. Informative. It's through email that I've found cool patterns and funny videos and all sorts of things, people sharing them with me, I love that. Then there is a whole other category of correspondence, the concerned emails. It took me a while to get accustomed to it. All these strangers, all their fears. We're so alike in that we all carry secret fears but it took me a while -- a very long while -- to understand that some folks feel a deep need to warn others, help them avoid sure tragedy. It's not even a thought process, they just do it instantly. I think perhaps it's their way of reaching out, relating to others, showing connection.
That first year I was so soft, every fear I had was so transparent. People would comment or email me with their fears and I felt overcome, like I had to take on each of these new, strange, unforeseen worries.
"That thing you wrote about today? You shouldn't do that, maybe you didn't know, but... it could end horribly, tragically, it's unhealthy, causes cancer, explodes on impact, will cause food poisoning, is bad for cats, contains toxins, is bad for the environment, leads to getting fired, traveling alone is dangerous, hotel safes are not safe, your passport will get stolen, you will get lost, watch out, beware, it's harmful, you drink too much, peanut butter is fattening, the garden soil is probably toxic, I knew this friend who ate that and got so sick...."
And I would worry, fret, overwhelming anxiety crept in. I am human and fallible with my own personalized bag of crap and fear. But I couldn't anticipate or even dream up other people's fears until I started getting emails. I would write some hasty, chatty little thing and suddenly people -- people I did not know -- would scold me, school me, tell me all the ways I was ignorant, astray, about to maim, addicted, lost, tragic, pathetic, about to kill my cats, surely going to cause an accident. I was caught totally off guard.
That first year I took it all to heart because I had never experienced anything like it, and I was tightly wound all the time anyway. Soft.
The second year I was divorcing and broke and just tired. I took it less to heart. I began to suspect that complete strangers read my online diary and surmised one thing: this woman is a total idiot. She makes bad decisions and is stupid. Nothing about the email had changed, mind you, but all the sudden I was making it about my shortcomings, seeing it as an assault on my intellect. Irritated. Offended! Lord, that ought to tell you where I was those days.
The third year I just over-thought it and finally snapped, culminating in a breakdown in the Nashville airport. Awesome. I cried into the basket of chicken fingers at some overpriced restaurant with bad barbecue sauce.
After the meltdown, I loosened up. It helped that I was more comfortable with myself and that I had not actually come to some tragic end as predicted. I threw caution to the wind and I did not get eaten by a monster. I laughed a little more, at myself and at other people and our collective insanity. I started feeling grateful for notes from strangers. Happy. Interested -- not assaulted. I started looking forward to the new and goofy stuff I would see in my inbox each day. I can't wait to see what people are saying today! How does that person have email in prison? I had no idea that yarn could be funky because of YARN PLY. Isn't that interesting how this woman interpreted that sentence and got something totally opposite of what I intended? That is so fascinating! I should aim to be more succinct next time. Also, I should spell check. I use a LOT of commas. They make yarn from what kind of animal? Wacky!
These days I love getting email and seeing where people are at, what they're reading, what they hear, what they knit. I even appreciate the people who tell me I need 12 steps and a prayer because I finally understand that it isn't about me, it's about them and their fears and that's fine. But it's theirs to carry, not mine. People tell you things all the time that have nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. You don't have to take it on personally. That is a relief and it frees you up to just live your life instead of constantly being on the defensive. I do feel a connection to folks whose hearts beat in rhythm with compassion even if it's misplaced concern. That sort of care is hard to come by and I appreciate it all. But I am not a handyman's special, I am not a fixer-upper for someone else, I am not an art project. Once I got that into my thick head everything came easier, I relaxed, it's been good with an occasional ugly cry thrown in for balance.
I am a little taken aback that we seem to live in so much fear. It doesn't seem healthy, folks immediately feeling the need to warn others about surely impending doom. I can't tell if it's forever been this way or if something in our society has shifted, moving us into a place where we instantly think of the worst-case scenario, feel the need to warn people, feel scared of outcomes. Scared of peanuts. I'm not built that way so it still feels foreign to me and I haven't quite wrapped my mind around it. But maybe it's always been this way? Or maybe the pervasive news of fear has forever altered the way folks see the world. What do you think? I'm not sure, myself.
With all our stress and anxiety and concerns it's no surprise we fall into the ugly cry seeing a group of people dance in a train station. We're a whole world so constantly vigilant against tragedy (or addicted to it?) that a moment of pure joy makes us fall to pieces.
Like everyone, I want to choose happy over tragic and like most people I have my days. I'm not a Pollyanna. I absolutely hate it when someone tries to paste a happy face sticker over every last thing, it's trite and annoying and it feels fake. But I also work daily not to immediately default to the worst-case fear, either. It's so exhausting to always be on guard against unforeseen trauma and it never really changes the outcome anyway. It's easier to make jokes about stuff, loosen up, let your freak flag fly, use the damn hotel safe if you want to and eat peanuts with wild abandon.
And now and then it feels good to do a little ugly cry. It's cleansing.
Posted by laurie at 09:58 AM
October 29, 2009
In the city ladies look pretty, guys tell jokes so they can seem witty
One of my hidden talents is that I have a freakishly vast knowledge of song lyrics from the 1980s. I can conduct an entire conversation in random song lyrics, which I do sometimes at work accidentally and then I find myself on a conference call saying something like, "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to get through this thing called life ..."
Which goes over really well. As you can imagine.
Crosswords fascinate me. Not the actual completion or challenge of the crossword puzzle -- the only ones I have a shot of getting right are the crosswords in the back of People magazine. What amazes me is that it is someone's job to make all the boxes and clues line up just so. I'm sure they have software for it now, I think I've run across it somewhere online, but before fancy algorithms computed on microchips someone somewhere sat in an office and drew clues from words arranged in little boxes. This is what I think about in traffic.
Last night I stayed up past midnight trying to finish this knitting project and I'm still not done, but I think I can wrap it up at lunch time. Knitting on a deadline isn't as relaxed as random knitting, but it is far more productive. I'm going to lock myself away with my lunch and finish, my own little knitting sweatshop of one. Maybe I'll call my knitting friends at work and invite them, "I got me a Chrysler, it seats about 20, so hurry up and bring your jukebox money!" It would help if my song lyrics made any sense at all to the conversation at hand, perhaps.
More Sobakowa keeping the homefires burning:
They're lying on the beach perpetrating a tan so that a brother with money can be their man...
Posted by laurie at 10:20 AM
October 28, 2009
Reader Q&A Day
The immediacy of email still surprises me, mostly because I am not very immediate about it on my end. But just imagine you post some little essay and then you go get coffee, wash your hands repeatedly, flip through an Avon catalog, stare out the window, and fifteen minutes later you check your inbox and you have 149 emails about your forgotten essay's factual inaccuracies. How else would I know when I had neglected to talk up Alaska's tax-free status?
I tell this to my friend Work-Jennifer and she says, "Doesn't it bother you that an essay about people pointing out flaws in your fantasies only elicits a flood of email from people pointing out flaws in your writing?"
I think about it for a minute.
"I must be either totally desensitized or completely shallow," I tell her. "Because all I thought was, 'Wow, I have a lot of readers in the state of Alaska! Cool!'"
Here's some other recent email questions from readers:
I'm making the baby sweater with seed stitch bands that you recently made. I could NOT figure out the buttonhole rows. Finally, I realized that "P1,k1,p1,k2tog,yf, seed stitch to end" must be English instructions, and that the "yf" that made no sense should be "yo". I think the edition that I took my pattern from is older. When I looked on the website for errata, the pattern was called Baby Jacket with moss stitch bands. --Maureen
Maureen, I had the same problem with the buttonhole rows on the red baby sweater! That "yf" made no sense to me. I had to Google it and that is when I discovered Debbie Bliss and her seriously adorable baby clothes (in Baby Knits for Beginners
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Hi Laurie. I made the chickpea and kale soup you linked to last week and my husband and I both loved it! I just wanted to thank you for sharing that recipe. so -- thanks! (and if you have any suggestions for the chard or collards taking up space in my veggie drawer...) --Mims
Oh, I am so happy you like that soup recipe. I love it, it's a new staple in my house and it freezes and re-heats really well. Also, I am shocked that I do actually have a good recipe for chard! I made this Swiss Chard and Red Pepper Gratin last year when this recipe came out in the New York Times and I really liked it. That is also the recipe that started my deep love affair with arborio rice. I'd never made it before and so I just boiled two cups of water to one cup of arborio (so I had plenty left over from the recipe) and it was like heaven. Gooey, white carby heaven. Oh -- and the gratin wasn't bad either.
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Hi Laurie, I have been reading and enjoying your site for a couple of years. You mentioned in a post once that you are learning Polish. That struck me because I lived in Poland for a year and learned as much Polish as I could - tough language! Anyway, I found this website yesterday from a CNN post and thought it might be helpful to you - http://lang-8.com. You post journal entries in the language you are learning and native speakers correct them for you (and you can do the same for English learners). --Lisa
Lisa, that is so cool! I'm not sure I'm ready to write anything in Polish just yet but I love this idea. Proving once again you can do so much more with the innernet than just buy shoes and stalk old boyfriends on Facebook.
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Hello! I have been on a rather disappointing quest! I'm a relatively new knitter, and quite obsessed with conquering the art of sock construction...something at least bound to be productive one day. My weapon of choice is a set of DPNs which are metal. I've tried knitting a wide variety of gauges and for the life of me can't figure out why there are three gaps in my work. Every time I change over from one DPN to another, there is a nearly double wide gap in my sock, which looks ugly! Would you happen to know how to fix this? What am I doing wrong?! Any thoughts or suggestions will be greatly appreciated! Thanks!
--Trish
Hi Trish! Those gaps are really common, especially when you first start out using double-pointed needles. Sometimes they're called "ladders" or also "holy crap why do we have to use these freaking DPNs?"
Because I am a freakishly tight knitter I don't get gaps. I do sometimes get knitted objects that can stand on their own from the stiffness of the gauge but hey, no ladders! Since I don't think everyone is comfortable being a crazy-tight knitter, I looked online for some suggestions to help you and found this thread on the knittinghelp.com forums. I hope some of the suggestions there can help you close the gap.
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Hi Laurie! =-) I have a question for you. I have made the sweet little baby sweater out of the variegated yarn and am at the button stage. Did you ever tell us how to sew on those buttons that never in a million years will come off? I was away from the computer for about 4 months over the summer and into the fall and don't know if I missed it...and that is a LOT of reading backlog, I tell ya! If you did write about it can you point me in the right direction to find the post? Or, if not, if you ever get a chance, I am sure there are others like me who would love that info. I'm a fairly new knitter, maybe about 3-4 years worth of scarves, hats, bags,and dishcloths. Now I have graduated to baby sweaters and simple adult garments. No grandbabies yet (except grand cats, of course) but I figure the sweaters are good knitting practice and I can put them away in my grandma hope chest or have something already available when I get invited to showers, etc.
Hugs,
Debby Mc
Debby, I am SO glad you emailed me, I forgot all about the buttons! This weekend I'll sew something up and take a picture or two for illustrative purposes, as I to tend to be wordy, and I'll post something next week. Thank you for the reminder! And congratulations on your sweater-making!!
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Hi Laurie-- I just wanted to ask you where you got that rug in front of your fireplace in the picture. The smaller one on top with the squares. It's the exact color palette and similar square pattern as my living room rug and I could use a little bit of matching in my mish-mash of apartment decor. :)~Heidi
Hi Heidi! I wanted to be named Heidi for about ten years of my childhood. I was so jealous of girls named Heidi. Lucky you and your cool name.
The fireplace rug on top of the other rug (which are still there, by the way, I have made no progress at all in my house) was a little find from Target. They have such cute household stuff. And best of all, this time I actually found a link to the rug online for you here. I bought the small one which is a little too small for the fireplace hearth, but I love it and I feel weird returning something my cats have been sitting on for two weeks, so I may use it at the front door as the entry rug. But for now it's being held down by this little goofball:
If you look closely you can see Frankie's tail on the bottom right side of the picture. It's the tail with the white dot on the end. She sees the camera come out and wants to be in all the pictures. I had to push her out of the way before Soba gave her a smack down for harshing her kittycat fireplace buzz.
That's about it for today. I'm almost finished with my top-secret knitted item, which I have to ship by tomorrow at the very latest so I will be up late again doing weird things with yarn and wine. Hopefully by this time next week you will have pictures of what I believe is both the silliest and the most oddly-proportioned thing I have ever made in my entire life.
Thanks for the emails! Love you, Alaska!
Posted by laurie at 11:36 AM
October 27, 2009
Taxes and Death and Big Talk
More from the cutting room floor. Seems like all my favorite stuff got edited out with a red pen!
Taxes and Death and Big TalkMy accountant is a year younger than me, and he’s tall. Over six feet tall. He has dark brown hair and is the best looking accountant I have ever met. The first year I went to see him I was still in the process of getting divorced and I cried in his office. I did that a lot back then.
The next year I was happier, because I was really moved on from the crying and I was working on my first book. It was an exciting time, so much so that I managed to completely ignore his suggestion to begin paying quarterly taxes and this year I am sitting in his office, thirty hours before April 15th and I am watching the numbers on the screen add up. I brought my checkbook but I’m not sure how much it will help, I forgot to rob a bank first.
The accountant and I agree that the number is large, larger than we expected. I have to pay that amount, and I ask if there is some way to claim the cats on my tax return. He laughs politely. I own no house for deductions, I have no dependent children, and I am in the state with the highest tax burden in the U.S. The accountant and I chitchat before I leave –- I don't cry, victory again! -– and then he tells me he's getting married and she's in the medical field.
"Taxes and death," he says. I laugh politely and leave.
Later that night I call my dad and tell him I've been to see my accountant and I am now researching the states with no personal income tax.
My dad is used to me saying things such as "I think I want to be a painter and develop a dark side," and "I’m thinking about quitting my job at the bank and taking my chances at professional cat whispering. Unless there's an opening for blimp drivers, doesn't blimp driving sound fun?" He listens to me patiently contrast all the pros and cons of the seven states on the list.
"There’s Florida –- too humid. Nevada is too gambly. Texas is on the list but I was born there and if I move back no one will find my southern accent charming because they all have accents," I said.
"Yes," said my dad, "that and now you sound like a Yankee from living out in Los Angeles for so long."
Sounding like a Yankee is a cardinal sin for most southerners but I took voice and diction lessons for five long years so that I could have conversations with other human beings from outside the Delta without them interrupting me four words in to say, "Where are you from? Your accent is so... thick!" so I am not only unoffended by sounding Yankee-ish, but smugly thrilled that my family thinks I am a yellowbellied Yankee traitor in the diction arena.
"New Mexico was a real possibility," I tell him. "But it seems hot, and I already live in the San Fernando Valley so it would be out of the frying pan and into the fryer. South Dakota is really far. So that leaves Washington State and Wyoming. Those are all seven states with no state income tax. I don’t want to pay taxes anymore, so that’s as close as I can get without being jailed or moving offshore."
"I can see your time at the bank has paid off," said my dad. "You have become a true financial whiz kid."
"I’m thinking Wyoming," I said. "It sounds rugged."
"What will you do in Wyoming?" dad asks. He is always the annoying and how do you plan to pay for that missy sort of pragmatist.
"I don’t know, but I will be free, dad! Freedom! Los Angeles has been great but I am certain I have an inner rugged pioneer spirit just waiting to burst forth!" I said.
"When you come here for a visit you don’t even like to go upstairs," he pointed out.
I know better than to call my pragmatic, Southern parents and talk to them about ridiculous notions such as enlightenment, moving to encourage my inner pioneer or sharing my dream of one day opening a museum of knitted objects. Not just knitted scarves and hats but everything like tables, chairs, plates, little knitted cupcakes and silverware. I think it could become quite the roadside attraction.
This is a clear example of discovering who is on your team. There are people you love and admire and talk to every day –- friends, family members, psychic astrologers. But not everyone is on your team. Some people are just programmed to be dogmatic pragmatists. They can't help but poke holes in all your fantasies and stories. They're the ones who interrupt you to tell you that they don't think "Roberta" is the best name to use when you become an undercover operative for the CIA. Like they would know!
Those who are on your team will nod and smile and act like they are listening to you as you pour your heart out on the telephone. They are silently playing online scrabble on the other end of the phone line, but they are not arguing with your logic, your planning skills or your loose definition of "earning potential." These people are your support team, the ones you go to first with your ridiculous ideas and wild-hair-up-your-butt theories.
Everyone else –- no matter how close you may be or how closely related you may be –- will be full of all the ways your current dream and plan will never work. They will tell you how bad the economy is, or how risky that kind of adventure is, or that you're too short for espionage, and they will helpfully provide any number of ways you can fail, fall over or embarrass yourself. Those are the ones you do not share your schemes with. You can still remain close to these folks but you don't tell them about the long afternoons at your desk when you daydream, picturing yourself on horseback wearing faded jeans and something plaid, riding free on a windswept big-sky farm in tax-free Wyoming.
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Edited to add: Thank you for all the people emailing me furiously about Tennessee and New Hampshire. Those states tax dividend and interest income which technically does not make them personal tax-free states. As for you folks emailing me about Alaska, what can I say? It was a silly essay, not a real-life hard news story about the taxation situation in the U.S. I probably had wine. What's funniest of all is that it's not actually about finding a place to live OR about taxes! In my mind it was about fantasizing, dreaming, goofy stuff. Clearly now I know why this essay was cut. Thank God I have an editor, right? I seem to be hearing another language sometimes. Funny funny.
Posted by laurie at 10:17 AM
October 22, 2009
Like a star sighting, only better
Brush with fame
A few months ago I wrote about my favorite childhood books, one of which is The Grounding of Group 6
That's my brush of fame for the day. Exciting! Even better than the time I saw Ralph Macchio in the produce aisle at Gelson's. (He was so short. Why are all actors four feet tall? Is it because they have to fit inside the TV?)
It was exciting to get Mr. Thompson's email because it makes him REAL. I've read The Grounding of Group 6 a hundred times since I was a kid and I love his characters and his style, and I thought it was magic the way he could get me to read and re-read the story even though I knew what happened, had it memorized. That's what great writers do, they tell a story so well you want to read it over and over. But I forget that authors are real people -- people who read websites (or their wives do) and sometimes they even send a note. I forget this even though technically I am an author myself. Which brings me to:
Brush with insane
I love the mundane, the kitchen reality of making dinner or going to IKEA and I have a small, normal life. I like it that way very much. Most of the action takes place in my head, in words, on paper. But yes, of course, some things have changed now. I'd like to say the main change is that now I have a houseboy named Raimundo but we all know that hasn't happened... yet. Anyway, I was going to try to explain the inner shift that happened but that seems vaguely moronic and boring so instead I will tell you a real-life conversation I had with a fellow commuter on our fine L.A. freeway system. It's illustrative.
It was a Tuesday some time ago. It was hot and I had the windows zipped off the Jeep and I'd stripped down to my camisole because sweat was running down my spine. My CD player had suddenly stopped working and every FM station was on commercial break. Traffic was a nightmare and the whole four-level interchange downtown was clogged and people were tense, murderous, ready to honk.
I had to merge onto the 101 and the guy in the primer-grey Honda right next to me kept edging me out. I am not a timid driver, I'm not one of those people who needs an Act of Congress to merge into another lane. I'm efficient, I'm on top of things. But this guy was determined not to let me in. I would sense a small opening in the traffic and before I could even turn my steering wheel he would accelerate and block me out. Finally, I put my blinker on and merged right into his lane and I figured that if he didn't stop we'd have an accident and during the investigation, one of us would be ticketed for having no insurance and it would not be me. I merged.
His windows were down and we were six inches from each other.
"You effing b**ch! You drive like sh**! Eff you!!!" he yelled at me.
With no windows in the Jeep it was like we were sitting right next to each other, hollering.
"Oh yeah? Yeah? You want to go there?" I yelled back. "You think I'm an Effing B**ch? I'm a PUBLISHED AUTHOR. You can find my book in fine bookstores near you! SUCK ON IT!"
It was both my greatest road rage accomplishment and the most publicity I've done voluntarily. And he did shut up, I assume he was stunned by my expansive vocabulary. I knew that even though I may have stooped to his level and hollered at him on a freeway, I had one up on him: I was a published author. I felt the confidence of my own dream come true. I flipped him off and merged onto the 101.
Posted by laurie at 09:21 AM
October 13, 2009
Stuff I have been doing and also not doing, sometimes at the same time
1. Awaiting the Storm of The Century
We are on Storm Watch 2009!!!! over here. There were actual raindrops on my windshield this morning. It was very exciting because I was prepared for windshield watering ... a few weeks ago I bought brand new windshield wipers, not out of a fit of preparation but mostly from embarrassment. My old ones had cracked and rotted from disuse and part of the rubber was flapping off. My new wipers are so efficient. I got to use them at least three times this morning! This is the first measurable rainfall we've had since June 5th, and that was a fluke. They say ("The U.S. Department of They") that this is going to be a wet winter. I love the rain, it makes everything clean again. Downtown, which normally smells like a human litter box, will soon be fresh and sparkly.
2. Procrastinating
We have projects at work that are so involved they've spun off side projects and the boxes at home will not unpack themselves and my manuscript was due 100 years ago and I have decided I want to move to Spain and herd sheep. I've been doing a lot of anxious cleaning. I cleaned my keyboard four times yesterday.
3. Blah blah
I've been listening to everyone at work talk about their Myers-Briggs, except one co-worker who shall remain unnamed who thinks the whole thing is a load of crap. Which is funny to me because I would much rather be said coworker's personality type than my own.
4. They're all leased anyway
All the cars in my new apartment's garage area are really nice, expensive cars. There are about eleventy-nine BMWs and just as many Mercedes SUVs and then there is my Jeep, which is still the coolest car EVER!!! but it definitely needed a bath, so I took it to the car wash and even agreed to have them put the shiny stuff on the tires. Now when I walk out to my car it looks like this rugged, dented machine on top of these shiny Barbie Jeep tires. And then of course it brought upon us the wrath of Storm Watch 2009!!!!
5. Winter
Winter has arrived, we can tell it is here from the cold and inhospitable high of only 68 degrees yesterday. How ever will we survive? People at work are complaining today about it being chilly. I would feel more empathy for them but some people need to eat a sandwich or two because they have no fat to keep them warm. Me, on the other hand, I can wade through the frozen tundra with nothing more than a cardigan and my own thick layer of personal insulation.
6. Freakazoid
Since I got sick my germaphobia has taken hold of me with renewed fervor. I had to leave a store the other day because some woman with all these kids kept sneezing wetly and with great gusto up and down every aisle and it was almost like she was following me and finally I figured we were about to reach a tipping point in the sneeze-to-clean-air ratio and I had to abandon my groceries and leave. I have explained before how my germaphobia is both cyclical and has many phases of understanding. It's pretty simple, really. When I am very stressed out and feel like I have no control over my life I lose the ability to touch a public door handle. I think if we had to pick crazy qualities, I would definitely choose my brand of crazy over other people's coping mechanisms. It's cheaper than spending $200 a week on yammering with a therapist and it's more fulfilling in the long term than say road rage or a gambling addiction. Everybody's got some crazy! This is mine.
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Happy Monday-that's-a-Tuesday! I like short weeks. Friday sneaks up on you faster that way.
Posted by laurie at 10:32 AM
October 01, 2009
Panty lines visible from outer space and other news
The title says a lot about my morning. Et tu, Brute?
Cult of Personality
Everyone in my division had to take the Myers-Brigg type test and we had our results revealed during an all-day departmental meeting yesterday. I'd taken the test before about ten years ago which was of course prior to my great interpersonal meltdown, my "I got drunk and directed traffic in my nightgown" divorce, and before I came to work at Big Corporation, Inc. When I originally took the test I was an INFJ and I didn't expect any change since they say ("The U.S. Department of They") that people rarely change core personality types.
The "I" stands for Introvert. When I first took this test a decade ago I was shocked to find I was not just an introvert, I was a REALLY BIG introvert. My score was off the chart. The more I learned about it, though, the more it made sense. The best way I have ever heard the Extrovert/Introvert thing explained is that extroverts get their energy from being around other people and introverts get their batteries recharged by being alone. There's a lot more to it, but I wasn't surprised to find that I am still an "I" -- the person who prefers to go on vacation alone is an introvert? Big shocker!
The "N" stands for Intuition (as opposed to Sensing). The best way I've heard this explained is that Sensers make lists of to-do items they want to check off today (if not sooner!) and Intuits make lists of stuff they hope to one day achieve or see or experience. S people are detail-oriented and N people are maybe not so much.
F is for Feelings! Feelings, nothing more than feelings, trying to forget my feelings of love... I'm not a high-scoring F, so I also have some affinity for the other side which is "T" for Thinking. Generally speaking Thinkers are logic/truth/principles people and Feelers are harmony/tact/loyalty people. (By the way, there is a whole lot more to all this Myers Briggsonian stuff than I am explaining, this is just the Cliff's Notes of the Cliff's Notes version.)
The only surprise here was that I switched from being a very high J -- Judging -- to a very high P -- Perception. I was a little surprised at how big of a change I'd made in this area but the more I thought about it the more it made sense. I used to be a big judgypants. I had very specific thoughts about everything, I was exacting, regimented and spent most of my time and energy focused on other people and their issues. I gave a fair amount of my own unsolicited advice and spent a lot of time answering questions no one had asked me.
The change in this part of my personality was gradual but enormous. It's like someone else moved into that part of my brain. I still make judgment calls, but it's almost always self-directed and I've replaced my opinionated spouting off with "Eh, everybody's got problems. Who am I to judge?" I still share my opinions (product recommendations, here I come!) and I'll give my opinion about a topic when asked but even the tone of that has changed. I used to say with great authority, "Well, you know what you SHOULD do, you should do this and then this and then this and then you ought to blah blah blah..." and now it sounds like, "Well, let's see. This is what works for me but what works for other people will be different. However, since you asked, and only since you asked, this is what works in my experience..."
Funny. Anyway, this change made me secretly very pleased because it proves that people can change and this particular change has made my life infinitely better. Like Dr. Dyer says, "Your opinion of me is none of my business." And conversely, it's really not my job to tell you what I think of you. I can't tell you how much easier this has made my relationships. And my life in general is a lot less tense, I'm just not that interested in solving other people's problems or telling them what to do and I really don't feel like arguing anymore. It's like exhaling.
So, I am an INFP. Also, not surprisingly, I was the only person in the entire division who was an INFP. It's lonely out here in the wilderness of weirdness. Secretly I always want to fall into the statistical norm and I never do. It's a little like always getting picked last for kickball. The only comfort here is that everyone at my table fell into a statistical norm and each said they'd prefer to be in the "less than 1%" categories. That's the shared human experience, isn't it? Always wanting something different from what we've got.
If you want to take this test online I found some similar tests here (it has less questions but they're pretty consistent) and there's also the Myers Brigg Foundation, and of course there is a Wiki on it.
Earthquakes & Tsunamis
I am a little freaked out by the recent big earthquake activity in the news. Usually I am pretty Zen about this subject since I have no control over the tectonic plates and I have an overachiever Type A Plus earthquake kit at home. But recently I started having a recurring earthquake dream. In this dream, we have a major shaker here in Los Angeles next March. In one of these dreams I was writing about the earthquake, and I wrote the date but all I could see was "Ma" so then I wasn't sure if it was March or May, but everything else in the dream was the same.
At first I thought these dreams were stress dreams, much like the recurring tidal wave nightmares I used to have. But the earthquake dreams were so specific they freaked me out. So in a nod to my core superstitious personality type -- not noted in Myers Briggs -- I am now writing about this dream because saying it out loud will ward off a temblor. Also, probably later I will toss salt over my shoulder and walk around my cat three times while holding a sausage. Freakazoid.
October Brings Big Weather!
Who says we don't have weather here in Los Angeles?
Not only are we having wild temperature mood swings, Dapper Dallas is also hovering around the word DRIZZLE! Not that I believe it will happen, mind you, but just having mist in the forecast is enough to make people here think winter is upon us. Dallas Raines knows how to excite a crowd. I just got new windshield wipers on the Jeep so I'm ready for even a real raindrop, should that occur. It's always exciting to see the seasons change here in Los Angeles. Before you know it we'll be out of fire season and into mudslide season with a chance of wind. Our weather really keeps you on your flip-flop clad toes!
Posted by laurie at 10:24 AM
September 30, 2009
Knitting, Glee, Mr. Clean, Borders, traffic photography
Knitting:
The past few weeks have seen no knitting at all as I packed, moved, then got sick. A few days ago I unpacked the box that was hiding my newest knitting project -- I did manage to put all the necessary components (pattern, yarn, needles, etc.) together into one box but then I mislabeled it and you can imagine my happy surprise when I opened a box expecting to find the fondue pot and instead found my long lost knitting project. But it's a gift for someone who reads this website and I'm not going to spoil the surprise.
[ use you imagination, picture something knitted here ]
The other night as I was sitting on the sofa staring at a pile of boxes that sadly would not unpack themselves, I thought of a great idea for my living room. I have a really pretty wooden bowl thingy that I'm going to set out with some Noro yarn and a set of aluminum needles and at some point I'm going to start an entrelac scarf using said yarn and needles and I can just leave it out all the time because it will look pretty in the bowl. And that way even if I'm not working on a specific project I can knit up a little square or two at night. And if I use metal needles the cats (read: Bob) won't chew on them. They don't bother yarn but wooden needles have a ten-second shelf life around ol' Big Teeth. Anyway, as soon as I unpack the bowl and find the yarn I'm going to make it into a little domestic art installation. I'm not sure why this idea made me happy but it's the little things, you know.
Glee:
A coworker of mine mentioned offhandedly that he'd started watching a new show called "Glee." This coworker and I sit very close together but we watch none of the same shows, and if we've all learned anything about conservative business corporate etiquette, it is that you need to share some social connections with your coworkers and that usually ends up being TV. Which is fine with me, that's how I discovered Dexter which I became totally addicted to one weekend.
Anyway, I decided to Tivo "Glee" just to see what it was like and I think I got about five minutes into last week's episode (where Kurt dances his own version of a Beyonce video) and I was so in love already that I decided to watch all the back episodes in order on hulu.com. Here's the clip that sucked me into this show and made me an instant fan:
This whole episode was just that good. Glee is by far my new favorite fall show. It was even better since I got to go online and watch the pilot and the two other episodes I had missed. That also reinforced to me of how AWESOME the internet is because it reminded me of the year I was crackass addicted to Felicity and I was on vacation to like Poland or Iceland or somewhere that did not get the WB and I missed the episode where Felicity chooses between Ben and Noel and I was heartbroken. Heartbroken, I tell you! I had to call a friend of a friend who worked at the network to get me a bootleg of the episode on VHS and by then all the surprise was gone.
This is a very long way of saying that I now love the happiness that comes with knowing it's easy to find TV episodes I missed online. So I did, and I watched Glee from the very beginning. I was surprised by how good the clarity and quality of the streaming video was on hulu.com -- and even though there are occasional short commercial breaks some of them were HILARIOUS, like this one, the Dokken/chicken ad from Norton:
I think whoever came up with the concept for that marketing campaign is both brilliant and probably around my age. Kind of makes me want to spray my hair with Rave #4 and peg my acid wash jeans.
Anyway! Glee comes on tonight at 9 p.m. (8 p.m. central) on Fox. And now you have all day to watch back episodes in preparation. If you like it than you shoulda put a ring on it!
He's A Magic Man
Today at work we have a full-day workshop and part of the homework was to pick a brand you feel strongly about and share a bunch of stuff with the group like the brand's target demographic, its brand feeling, value proposition and market share, etc. etc.
I picked Mr. Clean and his Magic Erasers which I think I've written about already eleventy-nine times but hey, I love me some Mr. Clean. When the movers left big marks all along my freshly painted walls it was Mr. Clean to the rescue. I have Magic Erasered everything from the walls to the stovetop to the crockpot (I have one of those white crockpots and when you make pot roast it gets all discolored which grosses me out) and Mr. Clean is my man -- always available, never lets me down. While I was doing my research for our meeting today I came across this funny piece of trivia:
According to Procter & Gamble, the original model for the image of Mr. Clean was a United States Navy sailor from the city of Pensacola, Florida, although most people think he is a genie based on his earring, folded arms, and tendency to appear magically at the appropriate time.
Somewhere out there a real-life woman was probably married to the real-life Mr. Clean and he was a salty sailor. How about that!
Making a run for the Borders
I stopped into a Borders book store last night on my way home from work to pick up a gift for a friend's birthday. Guess whose book was on display! Oddly enough, I sometimes forget that I have a whole 'nother secret life so it always shocks me to see anyone reading my book or a store that carries it. I walked in to Borders to get the newest Dan Brown and saw Drunk Cat Hair books and I think I blushed. Maybe it was a relapse of the Cupcake flu but maybe it wasn't. Who's to say. Anyway, go Borders.
- - -
How this column became an entire ode to brands and products I have no idea.
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Finally, this morning's traffic shot:
Funny!
Posted by laurie at 08:40 AM
September 24, 2009
So that was nice!
Comments lasted a grand total of what... not even a month? Awesome!
Yesterday I wrote a little sentence at the end of my entry about pot roast. I offhandedly mentioned we're having a group lunch potluck thingy today at my job and the theme is to bring an item creatively made with peanuts in an Iron-Chef inspired taste-off. You guys always have the best ideas, so I thought I'd ask for recipe suggestions.
A few hours later I went to read the comments to see what new and unusual dishes my creative Internet friends make with peanuts and I found a bunch of nasty, bitter mean-spirited comments about peanuts. PEANUTS. I think I let out an audible UGH!!!!!!!!!!! Good grief on a cracker.
I can assure you all that:
1) Had I wanted a vitriolic diatribe on peanut allergies I would have googled it. I did not. I was not really that interested in vitriolic diatribes. I was however quite enticed by the recipe for Asian cole slaw.
2) The person planning the potluck checked with everyone first to make sure no one would keel over from some peanut butter fudge so you do not have to contact Human Resources, a legal representative or the ACLU, but thank you for the offer. (Also, why does this require explaining?)
3) I had no idea peanuts were the new "You're an alcoholic."
4) Our little departmental potluck is not putting you -- leaver of mean-spirited comments -- personally at risk of going into anaphylactic shock since you do not work here. I know this because I can see your IP address and if you are on my floor you have no other way to access the internet than through our subnet.
5) I kind of feel mad geeky having just said "subnet."
So, that was fun, an almost-month of comments! Say hey to your mama and thanks for the memories!
I know that there are other people who would handle stuff like that better. Some people love and embrace unasked for advice, unsolicited snarkiness and strangers pointing out that the sky is falling. Sadly, I am not other people. (I keep shopping for clothes like I am someone else though -- someone taller and skinnier. So sad. Yet, so hopeful!)
Maybe it's because I've been ridiculously sick for two weeks and I just do not have the energy or time or disposition for other people's issues. And I have at least learned that when people go off about some random thing like some complete stranger's potluck, it's their issue, not mine. I'm just so incredibly tired. I don't want to deal with other people's stuff. I had the flu. You know... THE flu. And it sapped the happy go-go right out of me. I know they say when you get sick and run-down the first thing to go is the sense of humor. I wonder if mine left forever? I dearly hope it comes back one day. ("Dear God, are you there? It's me Margaret and forget about the period, I want my happiness back.") Usually when I see mean-spirited comments I can hit the delete key without bemoaning the loss of civilized human discourse but apparently I have lost not only my sense of humor but my entire sense of whimsical bemusement. I got irritated and bitchy my ownself just reading people's blahblahblah.
Mostly I was irritated because folks seem to forget that even if the spiteful comment doesn't personally affect me, it may in fact directly insult a friend of mine who may have picked the theme of the potluck and who may read this here website and its comments. Perhaps when I get my mojo and my voice back all the way I will also get my cheerful, delete-key-happy disposition back. We'll see.
So that's that, off with their heads, no peanuts for you, pass the winesack. All this and I didn't even make anything with peanuts! I worked late last night and by the time I got home I fell onto the sofa and drooled onto the remote control. (I make single life sound SO ATTRACTIVE, do I not?) So I just brought drinks since nobody had signed up for that and it didn't require me to cook. And not cooking gives me so much more time to bemoan the loss of civil discourse!
Posted by laurie at 09:19 AM
September 11, 2009
Nine Eleven
There are a million places to read on the internet about politics and I have never felt a need to write about all that, mostly because I prefer to debate the merits of new brands of cat litter and whether or not I should finally make the switch from a plain old moisturizer to one of those fancy anti-aging creams. Decisions, decisions.
My parents and I have totally opposite political beliefs. It is because of this great ideological divide in my own family that I believe with ardent fervor there are good, decent and smart people on either end of the spectrum. I do not need people to believe what I believe. And to their unending credit, my parents have never tried to change me. They accepted early on that I often held the completely opposite viewpoint and we made jokes about it and they just let me be me. They have teased me to no end and sometimes we cannot talk about certain topics without rolling our eyes at each other, but in the end we respect each other. We share the desire to make our nation the finest and most decent place we can.
I am so happy and grateful to be an American girl. I love travel and I love my diverse and multi-ethnic adopted city and when I'm abroad I want to represent my country well to everyone I meet. I am not a xenophobic flag-waver and never have been, but I also never once backed away from saying I am an American, even when I traveled after the first months of the Iraq war when many people in other places were openly hostile about it. I remember being cornered in a bar in Reykjavik by two women who were enraged about the war and I just listened and told them that many Americans shared their feelings and felt frustration and anger, too. In the end I bought us all a round of drinks and one of the girls laughed and said, "It might be easier for you to say you're Canadian, you know!"
But I have never lied about being an American. I was in France two weeks after the stupid Freedom Fries thing and I was mightily tempted to all-the-sudden be from Manitoba, but I still told people where I was from when they asked.
To me, patriotism is being kind and open and welcoming and always propagating The Dream. I believe that our nation is a hopeful and optimistic place that one can come to and work hard and make a life and live better. My father is the embodiment of the American dream, and even though I know he is sometimes disillusioned with our politics, he is also someone who instilled in me a love for my nation, my neighborhood, and my work. My father taught me to look up, to look forward, to strive. My older brother Guy is also the American Dream, he has started over more times than I can count and worked his way up that ladder every time. I admire him because he never gives up, to me he embodies our national spirit.
After September 11th, when the anniversary of the events rolled around one year later, I was horrified that I would be expected to get up and get dressed and go to work that day and each and every September 11th from then on. I desperately felt we needed to make it a national day of mourning, a day of quiet and reverence and personal grief. I felt a lot of grief that day, I lost someone on that first plane and like many I also forever lost my sense of safety and my naive belief in the integral decency of others. I was furious that someone -- many someones -- could move here and work here and shop for groceries here for months, years, and then one day get on an airplane and create such evil.
I took September 11th very personally. I was angry, I was bereft, I was broken in half. I wanted that day to be forever silenced and remembered and held in your hands gently. I divided my life into pre-9/11 and post 9/11.
Enough time has passed now that I think I understand even more what it means to be an American citizen. It means to keep on keeping on, to move onward and remember without becoming mired in paralyzing sadness and regret. It means to remain optimistic and hopeful and to strive to become better. This nation is not perfect and never will be. We screw up. We're imperfect. But we don't give up.
I was very happy to see that September 11th is being commemorated in a new way -- today is the first National Day of Service and Remembrance.
The New York Times has a piece on it, this jumped out at me:
By joining with those already planning to take all or part of the day to aid their chosen cause or charity, Americans can show their patriotism and help recapture the spirit of community that saw so many people volunteer to help the families who lost loved ones in the immediate aftermath of the 9/11 horror.
This to me is the real essence of our American character, giving back, giving to others, giving forward. Much better than a day of mourning -- it's a day of helping. It's a way to remember and honor and give at the same time, which truly is the best of us.
If you are looking for places to volunteer at today specifically in honor of September 11th, visit http://911dayofservice.org/ or visit http://www.serve.gov/ for a list of opportunities to serve at all times in your area.
Posted by laurie at 08:56 AM | Comments (67)
September 10, 2009
Har har
I love dumb jokes. Here are some of my favorites:
Q: Where does the king keep his armies?
A: In his sleevies!
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Q: Why does a cow wear a bell around his neck?
A: Because his horns don't work.
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Q: What do you call a cow with three legs?
A: Lean beef.
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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs?
A: Ground beef.
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Two sausages are in a frying pan. One sausage says to the other, "Wow it sure is hot in here!"
The other sausage says, "Oh my gosh -- you're a talking sausage!"
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A dog walks into the unemployment agency to fill out an application. He tells the startled woman at the front desk he's come to see if there are any job openings in his field.
"A talking dog!" she says excitedly. "You should be in the circus!"
The dog looks puzzled. "Why would the circus need a plumber?"
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And my favorite joke of all, which I know I have already told you, is my graphic designer joke:
Q: How many graphic designers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: A lightbulb? Does it have to be a lightbulb? Can we go with a candle, maybe with a flickering light? Or a lantern? Why do we have to go with a lightbulb? I was thinking more along the lines of an open road, with clouds and a desertscape. Who came up with this crappy lightbulb idea? It was marketing, wasn't it?
Posted by laurie at 10:35 AM | Comments (111)
August 31, 2009
Monday List
This was supposed to be a little ditty about Jack & Diane... or rather about baby booties, which I completed and photographed so carefully then I forgot to bring my camera, so no pictures. Ah well. The only thing people are talking about anyway are the fires.
Driving into downtown today the smoke was so thick and heavy it obscured even the skyline. I have a lot of coworkers who live in or near the fire area, it's scary. This season is worse than usual, it reminds me of that awful summer five years ago when my ex-husband left abruptly and I was living in that huge condo alone and I would sit on the patio each night and smoke even though I knew it was redundant. Just breathing was bad enough. But that's what people do in hard times, they do whatever it takes to get through a single day and I don't regret a minute of it. Regret is useless, it robs you of living right now.
Can you believe it's been five years? By nature I am a very private person, and sometimes I'm shocked how much I poured out in this online diary. I think about removing it sometimes, it's all just the past. But then I get an email from someone who's going through it right now, today, and she says it helps and in the end I guess I'm glad I went a little crazy that summer and the whole next year, a majestic meltdown. And all captured in words. What I remember most about it is sitting out on the patio alone at night and smoking after all the tears had dried up.
So I'm grateful for having opened up and poured it all out. I'm happy when someone else finds it useful, or at least comforting to know she isn't the only one.
Other things I love today:
1) Firemen. California has the best firemen in the world, I am sure of it. They work so hard! And they're so goodlooking.
2) Those traffic signs that tell you how many minutes to wherever. Like this morning it was 80 minutes to downtown. It helps to know it in advance so you aren't getting more and more anxious as traffic crawls into the haze.
3) My ipod. I love the ipod, it's such a perfect invention. I love being able to carry a bazillion songs around so that when I wake up and have the line "Girl, put your records on..." stuck in my head, I can just pull out my little portable music library and listen to the song until I'm sick of it.
4) Coffee with milk.
5) Those little re-usable cold packs you can put into your lunch bag. Genius! Keeps lunch cold during an 80-minute commute. I have them in all different sizes.
6) My dad using email. It's so much fun to get an email full of pictures of the dog and the truck and family members and anything he sends. Now if we could just get my Uncle Truman on email we'd be all wired.
7) Finding sunglasses I forgot I had. They were in the seat pocket in the Jeep. It was like Christmas!
8) How your life can be something completely different and better than you expected in just five years. I love not knowing what will happen next. I love finally being able to believe it could be something even better than I imagined.
So that's Monday in Los Angeles, pictureless and bootyless but full of hot firemen.
Posted by laurie at 10:08 AM | Comments (89)
August 24, 2009
Comments (testing, testing)
Thanks for all the emails about the Great Pumpkin Massacre of 2009. I'm sorry I can't respond to all of them... all eleventy-nine thousand... but I read them and appreciated your notes. Also, let me just say that if I ever want to exact revenge on anyone who has greatly wronged me I know who I am coming to for ideas. Oh yes I do.
I know that it is annoying to have to do all communicating by email especially with someone who hates email and often breaks it or avoids it. Last October I needed a little silent time and turned off the comments. Then after a while I got over myself and one day I tried to re-open the comments but with some very minor code modifications and I broke them entirely. Nice work!
Now, a mere nine months later, I am getting around to attempting to fix this mess. Testing new settings below. Let me know if it mysteriously eats your comment, which it started thanks to my "fixing" it. Mind you, I can't fix it or anything, and it only happens sporadically but there it is. Your name still appears underneath the comment. I can't fix that either. Gack. I'm officially halting all efforts trying to fix this website and designing a newer fancier website which will be ready sometime when cars fly and jetpacks are the preferred method of commuting. Or in 2010, maybe.
Also: I delete comments that I think are mean-spirited, nasty, abusive, spam, or blatant attempts to get free advertising. Probably some other stuff too. It's not a policy, it's just common sense and it's how I roll. I'm not a corporation, I'm simply a person and I won't pay to host crud. And I might have times when I don't want public feedback -- not because of something you did but because I am occasionally just too thin-skinned for my own good, so on those times I close the comments. I know many people disagree with that approach. Luckily, they get to do whatever they want on their own website. Viva la difference and all that.
Finally, and most importantly, I want to thank every person who was surprised when I shut off comments, then annoyed they never came back but kept reading anyway. Thank you. Thank you to all the people who emailed, who wrote just to say hi, who laughed at me and with me at my dorky internet ways and understood that sometimes I am just fallible and persnickity and want to hide in a cave. I appreciate it more than you know.
Thank you! I'll go hide in my cave now.
Posted by laurie at 05:42 PM | Comments (241)
August 19, 2009
And Hollywood's calling for the movie rights, singing "Hey babe let's keep in touch..."
Sometimes it's so easy to find one nagging thing to dwell upon until everything else goes grey and sour. (I'm not talking about any one specific thing, just in general. In life.) But it's so much more comforting to look for even one thing that's going right and focus solely on it so that you're not as fixated on the other stuff. It's not easier but it is so much more satisfying.
Yesterday a coworker and I were talking about this -- her boyfriend watches the news and is well-read and intelligent and watching the news and being informed is really important to him. I don't remember how we got on the topic but she and I were both agreeing that we just don't have it in us to watch all the emotionally charged stuff on TV news right now about politics and the frustration and the yelling and the breakdown of discourse. (Well, I feel that way about most of the news, getting upset about topics that I have absolutely no control over is just a waste of energy. No matter how upset I get, it has no effect on the outcome.) Is this putting your head in the sand? Or is it maintaining sanity? Guess it depends on your point of view. Whatever works for you, that's what I think.
What's going right today? The weather for one, it's so cool for August! The low clouds start coming in from the ocean late in the evenings and by morning it's cool and overcast and even in the Valley it hasn't gotten over 90 in about a week. Last night I got home and it was 79 degrees! It felt like winter. I love cold weather (or I think I do, what do I know from cold weather?) and last night the cats snuggled on me as if I were their personal heater.
The kitty posse. They're all healthy, knock on wood. (I'm very superstitious, you know.) Last night I was picking up the stitches and finishing the neckband of the little red sweater and Frankie meowed until I put everything aside and gave her all the attention. People who have animals will get it, there's something so uniquely goofy and pleasurable about having to put everything aside so you can pet and coddle and murmur to this little creature who lives in your house, especially one who ignores you most of the time.
Infecting my coworkers with yarn instead of swine flu. It is so enjoyable to come to work and see what new thing Work-Jennifer is creating (today it's a Brangelina hat in a beautiful variegated wool blend) or see how Corey is doing with her entrelac or confess to one of them that I just spent all my discretionary income this month on yarn. A few years ago I was the only knitter in my office and now it feels like everyone is in on it. I love that so many people around here are getting knocked up so I can make baby sweaters -- it must be in the water. (Also: "I'll take bottled water for $200, Alex.") The weather helps, it's easier to pretend you're knitting during a long winter in Finland when you're not sweating through your clothes at 8 a.m.
Here's more: Coffee with milk, putting your ipod on shuffle and getting songs you'd forgotten about but love, rice and beans for lunch, finding SWS on sale online and buying it in every color, being able to call dad at anytime just to say hi, finding clean trousers to wear today even though I forgot to do laundry last night, traffic lighter than usual on the way to work. Cats yawning.
Yes, it's easier to list the crappy stuff and I am naturally accomplished when it comes to complaining, but it's so much less stressful to list instead all the things that smooth out the rough edges.
Posted by laurie at 10:21 AM
August 12, 2009
Summer Reading circa 1979
Last month columnist Nicholas Kristof offered up his list of top-ten summertime reads for kids. Then he had to write a follow-up column because of all the comments (people are very passionate about books!) I love children's books. When I was little, I didn't watch TV, I read books. Lots and lots of books. Books were my best friends and sometimes my only friends since we moved around a lot. I loved Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle and Betsy, Tacy and Tib and later all the people in Sweet Valley who attended the high school of my dreams. One of my all-time favorite books is on Kristof's list, On to Oregon (when I first read it back in the late 1970s, it was called "Seven Alone.") It was that book which made me come up with my own list.
My top-ten childhood favorites:
1) The Endless Steppe: Growing Up in Siberia
2) On to Oregon!
3) The Grounding of Group 6
4) The Laura Ingalls Wilder The Little House Collection
5) Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle
6) The Betsy
7) Go Ask Alice
8) Bridge to Terabithia
9) The Misty books -- Misty of Chincoteague
10) The Chronicles of Prydain books by Lloyd Alexander (The Book of Three
11) From the Mixed-up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler
12) A Wrinkle in Time
So there is my Top Ten-now-Twelve. I'm sure I forgot about 400 books, but those are my picks this morning. Just looking at this list makes me want to go home and open up a book and get wrapped up in its pages. Nothing makes you get out of your own head and into someone else's like a deliciously well-told story.
Posted by laurie at 09:03 AM
August 11, 2009
A little email Q&A day
I've gotten a lot of email about one apparently hot and inflamed topic spurred on by the close-up picture of my baby sweater on this page:
I think your stitches look the way they do because you are twisting your stitches...
Ah, the dreaded twisted knitter! To set your mind at ease: No, I am not twisting my stitches. But I was curious about the case of the not-so-perfect Vs, too. Thanks to all the great folks who wrote in and educated me about the ply of the yarn making the difference in the way the stitches look on the fabric. I had never seen my stockinette look like that (and I have knitted MILES of stockinette in the past four and a half years, it's my go-to stitch, yo yo) and I was happily enlightened by all the people who sent me this link to the article about yarn ply. It even has visual aids, hooray!
When I read the article it was sigh of relief. Blame the yarn! Blame is so good, so healing, so cleansing. It was also nice to hear from other knitters working with this Baby Cashmerino who had the exact same results. I don't mind the look of the finished fabric, I just wasn't sure why it was looking that way, and now I know. Knowledge is power. Word.
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Laurie, I want to know how you did it. The no spending for 3 months. Did you start with a plan, how did you decide what was a necessity, what did you do when you caught yourself starting to fall off the wagon. I admire you (ok, I'm really jealous)of what you have accomplished from that endeavor and I want to do the same. If you could give me any advice, what would that be? I need to simplify my life so that I can enjoy it.
Thanks, Linda
Hi Linda!
Well, the first time I did a no-spend it was for three months (and it was hard!) But in 2008, I vowed to go from Memorial Day to Christmas without spending on non-essentials, and it was revolutionary in my way of thinking, living, shopping.
Essentials vary from person to person. If this is all new for you, I would start with just a month. Try to buy only what is absolutely necessary: food, toiletries as they run out, gas, etc. Every time you see something you want that is not a dire need just write it on a list (I kept a little notebook for this) and tell yourself at the end of the month you can buy it if you absolutely still must have it. I kept a list and told myself I could buy all of it when my no-spend was over, but by the time a month or two had passed I found I didn't still want most of what was on the list!
That's how I got started. It took a while to get good at it, and I didn't beat myself up when I had minor slip-ups. I found that simply not being at the stores or at the mall every weekend helped enormously. I filled my time with other things besides shopping. I knit from my stash, made food from my pantry, and decided I could live without a new outfit for a month or two. And I could. I did. I do.
I have found over and over again the number one way to increase the amount of money you have in the bank is to just stop spending it. Even small periods of time used for a shopping moratorium -- a month here and there -- help boost your bank account. But really committing to it for at least a three-month period is where you can see the most benefit and where the payoff really starts. I found it takes about that long to kick the consumer habit.
It's also an excellent way to see how much of our time is spent buying and shopping and returning stuff and more buying. When I stopped shopping it amazed me how much instant free time I had every weekend. I made one trip to the grocery store per week and if needed a trip to Target for household stuff like toilet paper or shampoo or whatever. I found I really only needed to go to Target about once every month, not once a week. Funny how that works.
There's absolutely nothing wrong with shopping and buying things you love and make you happy and comfortable when you have the means to do so. Nothing. I'm not advocating that everyone turn all minimalist and live in an empty room with a single mattress on the floor.
But I personally had confused buying/shopping with happiness. There was a time in my life when I shopped to fill up something empty. And I did it to excess, and I had credit card debt because of it. Plus I had a clutter problem that was insane. So I needed to stop bringing new things into the house, stop spending money, and start figuring out what I was trying to fill up with stuff. It has taken me a long time and I'm still not perfect at this. I still take spending breaks every few months. Sometimes I go nuts shopping (last month I spent all my discretionary money on yarn!) and then I dial it back for a while. After four years of working on this personal issue, I can tell you my house is less cluttered than it's ever been, I still have plenty of stuff that I love and enjoy but now I can see it. It no longer takes me eleventeen days to clean the house, moving piles of clutter from here to there. And after all this time, I'm not one single cent in debt. So for me it has been worth it.
I hope this has helped, I know it's a long answer! Money and spending are so personal, and what is essential for one person may not be for another. I took a pretty dramatic approach and it worked for me, but I think you could do a modified approach and still see some great results.
Good luck to you on your quest to spend less!
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Hey Laurie, I am thinking about getting one of those DKNY wrap sweaters you blogged about. Two questions if you don't mind asking. I wear a size 16. Do you think the L/XL will fit? (I think I recall you saying you were about my size at one point.) Second, most of my upcoming travel will be to LA. Do you think the merino blend is thin enough to wear in Sept/Oct in LA?
Hi there! The L/XL will fit you perfectly. I have varied in size from a 14 up to a 20 (yeah, yeah, I know) and still that sweater has fit me. It's extremely flattering to any body type. Of course I can't wear it all wrapped and tied behind me like the stick skinny gals in the brochure pictures, but I prefer one long end draped over and across one shoulder, it feels very glamorous to me!
About our L.A. weather -- unless we have a freak cold spell, that sweater will be more than enough for September and October, which are traditionally our hottest months. It's not unusual for it to be 100+ out here in October. It does get quite chilly at night sometimes -- well, if you consider 60 chilly, which we do -- and a wrap sweater would be perfect.
Hope this helps and have a great trip!
That's me illustrating how glamorous book tours are. But anyway, I'm wearing my DKNY wrap and rolling with my Samsonite bag which now appears to be sold out.
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I could swear that I have heard of a website, I THINK from you, where I can say "I want to leave Pittsburgh to anywhere, find me where I can go cheap!" and the website will do this. Am I crazy or does such a site exist? If it doesn't, don't you think it should?
Yes indeed! Try this one:
You can pick just U.S. cities or different regions of the world and once you get the display of results, it has all sorts of advanced search filters too, like if you want the results to be sorted by your preferred airline, or by price or date. The only caveat is that the prices displayed often don't figure in taxes and fares -- and that can add a lot of money to the final cost! But it certainly is a cool feature to see what's on sale in the world.
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Hey Laurie,
Since you are my "packing mentor" I have a question for you.I am getting ready for a long weekend (5 day) with family at Disneyworld and am hoping to go with just carry on...My biggest issue is my make-up/toiletries. How do you manage to pack them and be within the TSA guidelines??? I usually can get by in the summer limiting my clothes but ALWAYS have issues with bathroom accessories!!
Thanks moochly!
Beth</