Could I actually be first? I am the queen of someday I'll be this, do that, look like this...etc. It's always nice that you can put these things into much better words than I could.

Now gotta go enter the contest for books!

Thanks for the great post, Laurie!

What is it about corporate life and commuting that seems to feed into the difficulty to stay in the present? Is the multitasking? Or just the excessive amount of time spending doing something you would rather not be doing, so you start daydreaming or what-have-you and then even when the yucky thing is over your brain still thinks it needs to multitask or daydream?

I've had the same experience with knitting that you have. I feel very lucky to have discovered it...and your blog!

Enjoy the June Gloom! I love it!!

Amy

Just one question. Do you have a lot of people asking if you have been to Iceland? Because personally? Never happened.

Blah blah nothing, it all makes perfect sense! I'm a daydreamer myself, and sometimes it takes all the effort I can muster to haul myself out of my daydreams and pay attention to what's happening around me, but I'm always glad I did. There's probably a lesson in that (stop daydreaming, perhaps?) but old comfy habits die hard.

I MUST locate a copy of Encyclopedia Shatnerica for my ownself. Awesome! And I hope the Lace Reader is actually about lace knitting, which I'm totally into right now, and I must also get my hands on a copy of Day of the Panzer.

have you seen what george clooney has done to his teeth?? he looks like jerry seinfeld now!!

i know perez hilton isnt the most reliable but still...

http://www.perezhilton.com/category/george-clooney/

george was so sexy!!! what was he thinking?!?!?!?

as for the free cat hair, i have PLENTY already, but if you ever need some more, gimme a holler haha

it's june? you'd never know it here in portland.

So true! I once had a counselor tell me, "depressed people are worried about the past, anxious people are worried about the future, both are losing out on today."

It's not that simple of course, but there is a certain truth to it. I'm working on being more in the "now" and it really is hard!! Sometimes I think I'll never get it right, then I realize that I'm worrying about the future again....

Yes, I'm usually right down the mental beach from you. So hard hard hard to not go there. Someone gave me a copy of "The Power of Now," and I couldn't even concentrate enough to finish it. Ack.

Courtney, George could have NO teeth and I would still day dream about him!

Marilyn -- I wouldn't stress over not being able to wade through that book, it's dense. I know so many people (some big time self-helpy junkies!) who only made it to page four LOL. I think he is a great thinker but not maybe the best at expressing difficult concepts in words us normal humans can understand. I prefer books I can "get" without having to plod through them.

But this idea that the past is over (unless we choose to drag it around all day) and the future hasn't happened and might not happen -- that's the stuff! I never considered how the past is just WAY OVER and it only exists in my head, and only matters to my day if I open it up and drag it around.

And the future will never happen, since you only live this minute. So holding out hope that I will be content one day "in the future" is flawed at best and downright delusional at worst.

I mean, if happy can only be attained "in the future" what the heck am I doing right now?

Anyway. Hope ya'll like the sweepstakes.

Please, never stop with the blah blah blah! We loves it!

If you can, take your knitting to meetings. This is not always possible, but I do whenever I can. (Preferrably, it should be idiot knitting, i.e. all garter stitch.) (And learn to smile sweetly when your nemesis says, "I wish someone would knit ME a scarf....")

Laurie Perry: "Life happens in the present moment -- not the past and not the future. If I don't plug in I'll always be stuck in an endless cycle of daydreaming about a better future, no matter how good the present is! And that seems kind of ungrateful. My life is really blessed in so many ways and if I just focus on those things and stop dreaming away the icky parts, I hope I can eliminate my habit of telling myself, "One day, when [whatever condition] occurs, I'll have more time, or be less anxious, or have more freedom. Or be happy. One day ..." "

Best thing you've EVER said Laurie, thank you!!

Sometimes I read your posts and it's like reading my own thoughts. Now, I'm not so self-involved that I think we are soul mates, viciously kept apart by the bulk of the midwest and its even more awesome cousin, the wild west.

Nope, I read your posts that perfectly describe me and I wonder, "If there're two of us [and judging by the comments you receive here, more] with the same neuroses, there's gotta be some weird, crazy, psychological diagnosis, right?"

Sometimes it's really difficult to be BSCwACI (Bat-Shit Crazy with Animal Control Issues).

I'm trying to live in the present, because everytime I think of my future, it scares me. (I have a chronic medical condition that could end up depositing me, paralyzed, in a wheelchair someday)

So far right now, I'm relatively healthy (except for said chronic condition) and I only have to give myself a shot every single freaking day, and except for the daily stab, my life is pretty good.

I feel like a pincushion, and sometimes I'm dizzy or numb or feeling a burning tingly pain all over my body, but I think I'm not doing too badly in the live in the present department. Sometimes I'll start thinking about the future, and then I'll get scared and want to hide under the covers on my bed, but I'm not doing that as often as I used to.

Being a day-dreaming, semi-agoraphobic,cat-fur-covered hermit myself, I can so relate to your thought process. Yes, I guess there are several of us here in bat-shit crazy land. That's ok. We're here. Now. So let's go to the beach damnit, I need outta here! Sorry, had a moment. Love your posts, Laurie.

Just wanted to let you and everyone else know that today is National Hug your cat day. If you dont have a cat you can still spread the love to whatever animal crosses your path. If your cat or whatever animal doesnt like hugs, petting, giving treats or a toy works too. Just spend sometime today with an animal and let it know that you love and appreciate it.

Have I told you I love love love it when you do this train of thought thing?
.

The interesting thing is, when you start plugging in to the now things move even faster. You'd think it would make things slow down some but it doesn't. And then suddenly it's a few years later in the now.

Hey Abby...when someone says "I wish someone would knit me a ..." I sweetly offer to teach them to knit. What a stopper that is! And very occassionally, someone takes me up on it. Love to teach people to knit!
Love your posts, CAP.

You are so wise.

Life is like a rollercoaster (at least mine is!). Sometimes it's fun and sometimes it's scary and sometimes it's boring (while waiting in line, of course!) You have to truly enjoy every second because once an experience is over it's gone forever. And sometimes you need to get through the scary bits to truly enjoy the fun ones.

Thank you for your wonderful and insightful post. You always inspire me.

Laurie - The more you blah, blah, blah, the more I like you! I'm so glad I found your blog. It's very generous of you to give away these yummy books! And generous of your cats to donate their hair.

I tried to take a picture of a set of books my son's selling on ebay - every shot had a dog nose or cat tail in it, until I temporarily banned animals from the room!

amen to all that...thanks

I love the picture of the cats 'helping' to take your pictures. My dad's cat loves helping me with my knitting - it isn't nice knitting with a soggy piece of wool.

I understand the concept of living in the moment, but how can a person have a relationship when one person is living for the day and the other is trying to plan a future of some sort? I love my time with my boyfriend, but when we're not together, that's it. Can a person live in the day, but still plan for the future? Fondly remember the past? How to find the balance?

I was wondering why Frankie wasn't in the book! hehe... So in tune with your living in the moment and how hard it is do do that. Best to ya!

I like the way you think as that dude from The Transporter is totally *like* hottttt!!

OK Laurie, how do you do that??? "...but I am genuinely happy with my life's weird path and I only think of my ex-husband in detached, random ways... like when someone asked me ...and I said, "... once back when I was married." I don't need revenge anymore, but at the time those fantasies helped keep me out of despair." --- weird factoid here - the ex-husband from my life, well, you know, DIED - suddenly - and I went to the funeral, because? well, Because! it was important! I saw his Mum, his brother, sister and brother-in-law (both men were the ones who said: It's OK, Jen, he's resting/at peace ... ) His mother was pleased that I came, and people who find out now are asking: "How do you feel? about him being gone?" well, now I know - the words were "detached" and "random" - and oh, how nice now to let go of the revenge fantasies!!!!

I'll finish reading the post now, but wanted to let you know you've done it again, CAP - Hit the nail right there on the head! Glad you had a good time at BEA, AND that you and the Yarn Harlot met up!
Jenni in Edmonton, taking time from work to read my two favourite blogs....bad Jenni!

Posted by: jenni reiz at June 4, 2008 11:31 AM (sorry, this ended up in another day's comments - today is the day that resonates!!!)

Completely agree with you, I love to just wander on off in my head. Call it my brain taking a vacation without my body. Sometimes though I wish the body was on vacation as well!
Did you throw out your back with all the books you brought home? Nice sweeptstakes, thanks.

I was going to enter the sweepstakes but I decided not to I don't need more stuff, even really cool stuff. Word.

There are so many cool distractions for active-minded people to engage in, so wonder it's difficult to stay in the present moment. Su much MORE FUN to dream.

But hey, if there are acufflinks involved, I say pay attention. You don't get to see that every day.

And by "you" I of course mean "me." ;)

I used to obsess over how my life could be instead of enjoying what it is - which is pretty great. I know the feeling that if I could just lose X number of pounds I would be happier and life would be somehow better. I just started buying pants one size too big and it's amazing what that little trick can do for your self-esteem.

Great post, as usual. One of my favorite quotes that I try to keep in mind:

My advice to you is not to inquire why or whither, but just enjoy your ice cream while it’s on your place.
- Thornton Wilder, The Skin of Our Teeth

I have totally been working on this for a while too! So, I can really relate to how hard it can be to stay focused. That focus is so helpful though and the magical part for me? It has unleashed a certain level of creativity I never really believed I had. I have never seen myself as creative AT ALL. Like, I have to explain to you if my stick figure is male or female kind of not creative.

What a great idea for the swag one gets @ conventions & stuff (and book signings)!!! A giveaway!!!
You always have the best ideas, ever.

That was some pretty great 'blah blah blah'!!!

@Rebecca - "Just wanted to let you and everyone else know that today is National Hug your cat day."

Isn't *every* day Hug Your Cat Day? :-)

I thought I was the only one who got better looking and thinner etc in their divorce dreams. Just think out of all that you got the chance to write a book around travel. Have a great June.

I have to hate you just a little because you managed to score a copy of The Lace Reader at BEA and I didn't and it was THE hot book of the show (well, not counting the Neil Gaiman book, but I didn't get that one either.) However, I did get to meet you, and you were just as nice in person as I thought you would be.

I'm so glad there seem to be more people like myself out there! I've been trying to concentrate, stop daydreaming - it's not getting me anywhere, I'm not living my life in the now; and can't seem to stay focused! Twice I've been in a meeting when they asked me a question and because I was not focused and daydreaming, I had to come up with a believable answer on the spot, even though (like in the movies) I had not a clue as to what had been said. I have to stop daydreaming!!! I blame it all on my anemic condition.....and Bush.

We love it when you blah, blah, blah! And you are right- I pretty much did lose March to a bad case of flu and pluresy and life seems to fly by if you look away for a moment. It's summertime- better enjoy it now.

The picture the other day of you and Stephanie Pearl-McPhee at the Expo made me smile so big. So I had your blog up on one page and then pulled hers up on another (and yes, there you were!) and my son just rolled his eyes at my knitting blog dorkery.

Oooh, free cat hair- that made me rush to enter! LOL Like I couldn't knit up a new cat with the layer on my furniture right now :)

Can you tell me which day Christmas is on this year? it always seems to sneak up on me.

and kids can be like cats -- always metaphorically sitting on what you want to read or photograph.

good luck staying in the moment. the next emergency seems to be where i'm usually living.

Keep up the "blah, blah, blah;" it's good stuff!

This is EXACTLY EXACTLY EXACTLY what I've been learning in therapy. (yes, therapy.) I too have a tendency to live in my head. I'm always looking forward to something else! I never enjoy what I'm doing right now.

This is my therapist's mantra: JUST RIGHT NOW, JUST THIS MINUTE.

I picked up a copy of your book while at BEA! I'm so upset I didn't catch you or even know the Harlot was there. But I did get Franklin's bag as well.

I brought home a VERY heavy suitcase with all the books I picked up, plus shipped a 20-pound box back as well!

i dunno, nancy. he just ruined it for me by looking like jerry seinfeld. i loved him for not looking like every other bleached out mr ed in hollywood!

i hope he has them filed down like hilary duff had to do after she got hers. a few gallons of coffee wouldnt hurt him either. he could come to my place for those. hehe

Uff! No wonder you needed a sherpa with all those books. I'm impressed.
And now that I get to bike instead of bus to work, my commute is much more "in the now." Trees are just prettier than the highway.

Hahahaha! 'Have you been to Iceland?' Hahahaha! (only funny b/c Iceland is a supermarket in UK and that is similar to their advertising tagline) I am so easy to please.

A fun thing to do with books when you are through with them:

www.bookcrossing.com

And, it's free :)

I keep wanting to save up all the slightly used cat hair and try to felt it into something. Or maybe learn to spin. But I'm not sure the one semi-long-hair would lose enough hair in any reasonable time. I'd love to add some Soba- and Frankie-hair to the pile, they've got such beautiful coloring!

What's that old song (60's? Chad & Jeremy?)with the line: 'only trouble is, gee whiz, I'm dreaming my life away'? I really, really need to cut back. When I can't get to sleep because I'm running all those soothing fantasies (the ones where I did, or will do, everything right) through my head, it's getting to be a bit excessive.

Though the revenge fantasies featuring the perfected me and my ex have pretty much gone away since I realized he's been married and divorced twice since me, one divorce complete with twin restraining orders. I was pretty sure the problems with US weren't all due to ME, as he'd claimed, but there'd been that little nagging thread of doubt. Which I can now laught at.

...And by "you" as always I mean "me."...

And this is one of the things I love about your writing. And by "you," I mean YOU! :)

Thank you for the sweepstakes, I love books. And, I love your 'blah blah blah'...what a writer you are! Day dreams can be a healing cocoon for a bit. Being in the present is good; I saw it like learning to ice skate; I can't go forward unless my feet are under me, with me. (not that I ice skate anymore...)

Interesting thoughts on being in the moment. Perfect timing, as I have been finding it harder to stay at my desk actually doing something this week. I'll try your approach and look at my work day with new eyes. Thanks!

You've given me something to ponder (again); thank you. And I'm glad the third frame of the Soba montage indicated that she did *not* give the Soba dump of disapproval on the Pile o' Books as seemed imminent on frame #2.

PS Frankie's cute-but-not-quite-as-cute reverse twin is on I Can Has Cheezburger

Oh, Laurie, what a great post! I, too, have wasted too much of my life living it in my head. I, too, am trying to be in the moment.

You really touched me today.

Yes, to live in the present, that is really one of the most important and also very difficult things in life. Some monks excercise it for a whole lifetime!

You should read "Tuesdays with Morrie" (from Mitch Albom). It's a true, very moving story, and contains this and more wise knowledge. It is one
of my most favourite books at all!

Paula

Amen.

I could totally see you as a redhead.

Just saying...

OK, so I missed my chance to comment yesterday but felt I must address something. As a pure California girl, I must say this. Yes. There is such a thing as Earthquake weather. It is so a real thing. Pinkish orange glow. Hot. Still. And then, every time an earthquake. Seriously.

I too am a dreamer. Whenever I'm not doing something else I've always got "stories" running through my head. While it is reassuring to know that I'm not the only crazy one out there (thank you!), I do need to be reminded to live in the now.

I am genuinely happier with my life right now than I have been in a long long time, but there is one major thing that no matter how many times I daydream about I just can't seem to actually do in real life. If I don't actually DO something about it soon chances are it'll never be more than just a daydream. As good as the daydreams are (and they are good... no loincloths, but still good...) real life would be so much better.

Laurie, do you think your boss would let you cybercommute, at least on Mondays and Fridays, or on whatever days there isn't a meeting at the bank? Maybe you can convince the boss that your contribution to the bank is much more valuable your presence in the office on Mondays and Fridays warrants.

great giveaway! I entered. That's one great entry form you've got. I've long been wanting something like that for my blog. Can u let me in on the secret? :)

Can I just say that I love you? And not just because you're giving away books, but I do love you for that, too. It's because you're so good at being normal which is what I think I am, or else you and I are abnormal. You say what I feel now and what I used to feel in those early years AD (after divorce). I would like to reassure you that you probably will find true love. It worked for me and we'll be celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary on Friday. You won't enjoy drinking or knitting any less though. It's a part of you now, like a shiraz stained, fuzzy appendage. Keep writing, girl! You make me laugh and you make me envious or your writing skill.

Thanks for validating the revenge fantasies stage! All my friends are still married to their original, decent husbands. They just don't understand... I'm a born and bred redhead, but being taller, skinnier, cuter - hey that would be dream come true, no chance here of a Lotto win or being with anyone awesome. Will now patiently await the sane stage where the ex-husband is all detached and random-like. Thanks for going through these stages before I get there, even though I am a bit older, it's kind of like a travelogue through self-helpy divorce recovery. Love the blah blah blah!

If you lose 65lb, you will look saggy and wrinkly in that cute outfit. Much better to be healthy and young looking with nice plump skin! :-) Just sayin'

I am practicing Mindfulness for 1 minute 3 times a week. This is concentrating on something (like your breath, but it could be chocolate!), fully experiencing it in the moment, while observing your thoughts without judging them. There is a clinician who specializes in this in Thousand Oaks if you're interested, but there's lots of info if you google Mindfulness. I notice the difference in my day-to-day experiencing and enjoyment of life.

In my meeting this morning, I spent most of the time mentally matching different yarns for a new style of scarf I want to try making. I figure it'll save time later on. Plus, I had to stop myself from gazing at the really hot guys from IT somehow.
Love you and your blog! I'm sending good finding-the-perfect-man vibes over to you.

You have gathered a lot of insight in the short time you have been on this earth, Laurie and you are also as cute as can be. Don't begrudge yourself for the less than perfect size, shape, hair. Believe me, when you are older and you look back on the pictures of yourself at this age you are going to think 'Hey, I looked pretty good".

OMG. Encyclopedia Shatnerica.

WANT.

Um, sorry, is my geek showing?

Staying present in a meeting? You are queen of the world, in my book!

Have you ever seen the Princess Bride? There's lots of talk of revenge in there. I think you'd like it...especially the two goofs (one being Andre the Giant) who are in the "revenge business." Plus, the movie is so old it will be available at the library or any cheesy video store!

Good message. Reminds me of an episode of Something Understood on BBC Radio 4 a few months back. The presenter mentioned something a Buddhist monk had said to her. He had apparently pointed out that people will often be in such a hurry to get to the next moment that they don't focus on what's happening now - as you have. His illustration was the way in which you will be eating, say, an orange, and while you're still chewing the first segment, the second is on its way to your mouth and so on and so forth.

You know Sue Grafton, who writes the A is for Alibi series of mysteries? She says she wrote the first one because she was lying awake every night plotting how to kill her ex-husband, and she thought that rather than risking jail she should put the fantasies to good use so she wrote the first book. She's at T is for Trespass now and is sold in 28 countries, so that must be a very satisfying revenge.

Laurie, I really like the pink sweater/shrug thing you wore at the BOA. You look fabulous! Of course this is an entry behind!

Long time lurker, first time poster...

Anyway, I was just thinking the other day about what would happen if I stopped going around and around in my head and waiting for something before I lived my life and just, you know, got on with LIVING MY LIFE.

I can't decide if it would be better or worse than I think, but sometimes I can talk myself out of really excellent things by anticipating what will happen if I do them. If you ever figure out how to get out of your head and actually live life, you will definitely have to let us know!

The one fatal flaw with always attempting to live in the moment, be mindful, etc. is that so many moments in day to day life are just plain boring and/or tedious. I see no point in feeling every momement of a grinding commute or folding that 5th load of laundry or shoveling cat litter. This is where a little bit of going somewhere else in your mind is a good thing. Daydreams can lead you to thoughts of what you want in life - now and later.
On the topic of any of the crap that life throws at you, a motto: Living well is the best revenge.
p.s. Love your blog; you write some great stuff.

My ex-husband and I were always talking about "One day...". We would laugh that one day would be one hellofaday...your post really got me to thinking about that and how it was our way of not dealing with our now and our life and our problems...so 2 years ago I made a resolution of "no fear based decisions" which forced me in the here and now and here I am in a new state, a new career, back in school, and happier than I ever thought I could be. YEAH for today!

Talking about June sneaking up on a person, my daughter told a friend of hers that it was her birthday, and they replied 'but isn't your birthday in June?' to which my daughter replied 'yes it is, and so are you'

Great Post! Thanks for being there, giving me something to think about. 'Living well IS the best revenge.' maybe because living well means being grateful, thoughtful and having a purpose. And all those things crowd out thoughts of regret and revenge. For me, as a mom, living in the moment also means remembering that what I do right now will have long-lasting effects in the lives of other people. That can really make one take stock, but yet, it's so good to be reminded. Thanks for that, and you deserve all the good things that come your way, remember to enjoy them, and remember having a man to share them will not make you or the events more worthwhile. You are a perfect, whole, wonderful person all on your own!! Love you--look how much you mean to people who have never even met you!

From Dan Millman's book "Way of the Peaceful Warrior", the simple line "The time is now and we are here" is a good reminder for me to live in the present.

Thanks! I really, really, really needed to hear that today. I am very bad at the here and now and am always looking far in the future (e.g., saw guy for sixth time, planned wedding in my head.)

also, fyi, i put down a preference for pile #2 but any of them would be ok, too. :)

has anyone started a fan club group for you on Yahoo! yet?

Daily lurker, infrequent poster.

My thoughts on the "here and now" a jumbled, at best. I never realized how time just absolutely zooms by since my kids have been in school. I swear, one day its mid-August the first day of the school year, and then BAM! the last day has arrived. My kids, of course, will tell you how long and terrible the school year really is. But, in my 46 year old mind, time is going, faster and faster every year. All that being said, thinking about here and now is especially timely. I want to really see my kids how they are now, today, another year older and more mature, knowing that "kid years" are all too fleeting.

I find that especially hard in relationships. You always want to project some romantic thing he will do and then when he doesn't do it you convince yourself it's a bad relationship instead of seeing it for what it is. Men think in points, women think in lines. While we are dreaming ourselves along the relationship he's focusing on something wholly different. Another reason I think we are simply a sitcom for the divine.

I laughed as I was reading about your meeting! I've sat through my share of them and can just imagine you freaked out everyone by paying such close attention!

Live in the moment, indeed.

I had to sit through a meeting where my coworker said out loud, "I don't know what to write down so I'm not going to do anything. I can't do this"
I am so frustrated, but I take deep breaths and remember to let go of things I cannot control.

And, it has rained here everyday for the last 4 days and the extended forecast in the paper they only had to copy and paste for the next week!! It's all the same. We're calling it Juneuary here, 50 degrees and raining.
Cheers, hope I get the books!

Delurking for a moment to say that I am reading the "Not So Big Life," which has very similar advice to live in the moment. It's so hard to do this when our culture takes multi-tasking to professional sport level, to slow down and listen to what people are saying to you, enjoy the summer scenery, etc. I'm not sure if I'm ready to give up the daydreaming yet, but would be eternally grateful to be rid of the adult babysitter, aka TV, in doctors' and dentists' offices, restaurants, and other places where I might want to actually talk to a person, read a book, or just collect my thoughts. We are all in this together though!

Studying Eckhart Tolle's books has changed my life.
Being present in the moment is the only way to live but it can be really hard.
Sara

I wrote the best unpublished murder mystery when going through my divorce. In it a man much like my ex was murdered by his exwife and his exlover. It wasn't good but it started me on the road to healing.

BE HERE NOW is a simple concept, but you have captured the difficulty we have living it.

What a great time to experience it-my beautiful garden abloom here in Iowa. The first roses are opening.

I can always use more books in the queue.

I think that because we are so engrossed in the moment that is how when we look up it is already June....I'm just saying....I have to keep a calendar....I discovered them when I got really busy and that keeps me sort of in the same month, if I use it. Otherwise I'm likely to write March or January on a check as not...but maybe that isn't living in the moment at all. hmm...have to think about that.