You know I do... but mine is only partly imaginary.

Good reading. I don't think I'll wait anymore for any of my life to start. Sniff. Thanks!

I'm waiting to become a grown-up. And I'm 43.

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, for "Are the conditions ever right for anything". Waiting for my life to happen is about to enter its 60th year. I have alot to make up for. Thanks for the reminder to keep on track!

Yay!!! I'm at least one of the first to comment.

I LOVED the story of Katie & Armando. It was very very cheesy, yet beautiful too.

Your reason behind this post is some good advice that we should all listen to and practice. I know I need to regarding transferring to another college.

Anyway, as always much thanks for your awesome life tips and when will your next book be ready????

Thank you for that.:)
You're a gem.

I kinda like the Katie and Armando story.

I mean, I don't have one of my own, but I like reading yours.

Thanks for this post, Laurie. I need reminding that living life has to be in the "now."

Hi, LOVE your blog!! Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and insights with the rest of us. These posts about waiting for conditions to be right, to finally start living your life, really resonate with me. That's been my tendency for a long time, but I am finally diving in and trying my hand at: singing while I play piano (yikes), writing a book, designing my own clothes. And it's hard and often discouraging while you work your way through the sucky phase. Maybe having a sense of humour is next most important thing after tenacity!

I'm waiting until I move to buy a new couch. But that's more of a practical issue than a "someday". It's only a couple of months away, and then I can get the movers to haul the old one to the dumpster instead of trying to figure out how to get it there by myself.

My "somedays" are weight/health related. Someday, I'll weigh less and be in better shape and my Crohn's will be in remission, and then I want to do the Disney World marathon. Someday, I want to get my college friends together and start a team in the local adult kickball league. Someday, I might even consider joining the local roller derby league. (This one also depends on me learning to roller skate A LOT better than I did as a kid.)

Laurie...you have a serious career in romance novels ahead of you ;-) I had a major "Katie & Armando" in my life. It was "once my marriage gets fixed, I'll be able to....." and there were lots of things that went in that ... space. It wasn't until the creep left me for someone else that I realized I could finally have/do all those things because he was no longer there to be the anchor around my neck. And now I'm doing all those things...I've lost weight, have an interesting new job, am trying things I never tried before (like snowboarding this past weekend - yikes!) and have a great new guy in my life. "Katie and Armando" may make a great romance novel someday (assuming you can get past the serious plot issues), but they're no way to live your life.

I think I've been waiting until I'm not scared to do anything scary. (Is that even possible?) 'Kay, well...I'm going to go find something scary to do and do it. Thanks as always for another inspiring post! You rock, Laurie.

I forgot to mention- you should check out Romance Writers of America. It's a great place to meet other writers and get info. Sort of a Write-n-Bitch. I know there's at least one chapter in LA. The website for National is: http://rwanational.org/

You are 100% correct, NOW is the time not "someday". I have throughout my life (37 yrs old) been a WAITING for this or that type of person (Virgo, everthing has to be perfect.) Last year my hubby was diagnosed with testicular cancer (very scary, but not one of the worst ones to get.) He is fine now (caught at early stage), but I quickly realized how in a split second things can change. How afraid we were those months of tests and treatments. I was thinking OMG please don't let this be what will take him away from me I couldnt handle it, but we got thru it just fine. I have become an intense hypochondriac, but I'm learning to let that go because life it truly too short, but definitely "wide" right Laurie(ya'll is learning me!) I'm really trying hard to live in the now and enjoy all! Still traumatized about gettin' on a plane to go anywhere, hate doing it, but I love to travel so I deal with it. Thanks for the uplifting posts - LOVE YOU!

I'm waiting for that personality transplant to come through! (is that covered by insurance? ;) ) Once I can be somebody I would like to be around, I will conquer the world....

Oh, so many Katie n' Armandos as you well know. I am removing them, one Armando at a time...

I'm trying to write a book too. I'm stalling because I am petrified of the rejections I know I am going to get and have already received. It's horrible. I wish I didn't have this compulsion to write and that I could be one of those people who are satisfied working in offices and doing nothing else for their entire lives.

Your post today really struck a chord. I've always said that "someday I'll write". Not necessarily the Great American Novel, but I'll write something that has a beginning, a middle, and an end...just to prove to myself that I can do it.
A month ago I signed up for a creative writing workshop and so far I'm loving it.
Now, if I could just lose some weight then I would...

I was Katie in real life. I left my fiance after 7 years together to be with my now-husband. We married 9 months after we started dating. It's been 19 years together and I know for sure that I made the right choice. Three months after our wedding I was diagnosed with lupus.

I truly think that life is all about being able to be adaptable. Most of the time life brings you what you need, even if you didn't realize it at the time. The excitement of marrying the love of my life was temporarily marred by my diagnosis. Over the years I have realized that my illness and my husband's treatment of me when I need him most has made me love him even more.

The moral of this story is (and sorry to ramble on and on and on) is that sometimes the worst things that can happen to you can eventually become one of life's greatest gifts. You, Laurie, have created such an amazing life and career for yourself from the ashes of your divorce. I am so very proud of you!

The name Ernie?? Perfect for a clueless husband! And it is true that Latin men are the sexiest ones! Feel free to ask me how I know! ;o)

Thanks so much for this, Laurie--today (as often) it seems you're speaking directly to ME. To all of the things I put off UNTIL. Well, one of my best friends was diagnosed with a brain tumor two weeks ago (talk about a wake-up call), and in the midst of the worrying and phone calls and visits and hand-holding, I've given a lot of thought to the question of W-T-F AM I WAITING FOR? in terms of the travel, the child, the everything, the life I'm putting off until I meet the right man, lose the weight, get caught up at work, yadda yadda. No more waiting for either of us, and thanks for the reminder. You truly rock, and your candor and courage are an inspiration.

I have read far worse-written novels that were still entertaining beach reads, so I definitely think you've got something there - entertaining and quality writing. The story reminds me a lot of that movie with Diane Lane & Richard Gere ("Unfaithful", I think?). The hottie (Olivier Martinez) was French, but was definitely an Armando type....

So, what is my "Katie & Armando"? Probably something like, "if only I lived in a bigger house, I could really organize and immerse myself in my hobbies & crafts...".

Laurie, thank you for reminding us of this. I want some day to be today. I want it to be now. I want to go on an adventure!

Hey Mary in VA! How the hell are you?? How;'s the new job??

I don't care if it's cheezy I want to know what happens next!

You are spot on about the guitar lessons! My older daughter started studying a few years ago and I loved listening to her play. Then it hit me -- why wasn't I taking lessons, too? I'd always wanted to, but never had the time to learn more than three chords. I finally asked her teacher if he'd take me on as a student, and at the age of 44 I started to play.

Nine months later I'm loving it and kicking myself for not doing this years ago. I'll play "Brown Eyed Girl" (and sing -- loudly) for anyone who wants to hear (and for some who don't!)

The only problem is my daughter flat-out refuses my suggestions to form a band. She will jam with me in the living room but said she would rather die than perform with me in public. Kids -- go figure.

I've been reading your blog regularly for a while now, and I have to say that I laugh until tears -- REAL tears, seriously-- are rolling down my face. I've never commented before, but the Katie & Armando thing? Oh yeah. The whole "someday I'll write a book thing"? Oh, yeah. I even went as far as to get an MFA in creative writing and TELL every stinking person I saw that I was a writer, and STILL hadn't actually FINISHED a book. (Sorry for all the caps. I'm just TOTALLY serious today. And want to make sure you get my inflections.) Until this year. I did the NaNoWriMo challenge (http://www.nanowrimo.org/) this year: It's cheesy, it's gimmicky, whatever. I didn't care. I knew that it was now or never. It had been fifteen years of calling myself a writer. And I wrote a novel in a month. And you know what? It's pretty good! I'm almost done revising, but if I hadn't had my own Katie & Armando moment *I* would be the one directing traffic in my nightgown.

(As a misplaced southerner myself, I wonder: Is that a *geographically specific* reference? Do people all over the country have a point of reference for the crazy lady directing traffic in her nightgown? Or is that just Home Folks?)

And as for your plot problems, and their lack of happy ending? I say, hang them out to dry. Follow their sad crazy story all the way to the sad and crazy end. And remember: YOU are in control of the plot. If they get all tangled up? As Al Pacino says, "Just tangle up, and tango on."

Tango on, Crazy Aunt Purl

Your (new best internet friend),

Prof. Alice Oddcabinet (<--- Not her real name)

(Hey! How do you get the page break to work on this darn thing?)

it may have been cheesy but you had me at '"Oh don’t worry," her husband Ernie would say.' gah!

anyway my 'katie and armando' is professional in nature. i'm wasting my time at this job but it's so easy to just stay when the work is easy, the pay is decent and the hours are relatively short.

Yeah, I'm very good at the waiting game. I am working on a bold step to take me out of that place. Here's hoping it turns out well...(and, I guess if it doesn't I can just try again, right?)

I think I just got tired of waiting, at least with writing. But there are other areas I still have roadblacks with, like losing weight.

I didn't want to go to Rome at my current weight, but I did it anyway and it was fine. No one laughed and pointed. I guess I just want to rid myself of that gap, the gap between wanting and doing. I am at least closing the gap a little.'

Thanks ya'll for not being too harsh on poor Katie & Armando ;) I know they're cheesy but I do still kind of love them.

Great post, Laurie. There's always something I'm thinking about doing that gets put on the back burner. But, this year one of the big things on my list is getting done, which is great! And, it's not scary at all... it's fun!

Happy Thursday!

Oooof-tah as they say in Minnesota! Katie and Armando got it all over Sven and Lena. Oh yah!
Well, this ol Minnesotan (magically transported to the Great Northwest) has just been going through her "archives". Old letters, notes, diaries and photos. Yes, it was a very good time . . well, "times". The ONE thing that takes me into the moment still seems to be the music. So. . guess I'll go back to my archive diving and dream on. Feels so Good! The yard work will wait -so will the laundry - this is my soul food!

I've always wanted to write a book!!! But I'm waiting on buying a laptop so I can write, but freely. So stupid! Ha! Thanks Laurie! You keep me sane at work. (or atleast let me know that it's ok to be insane.) ;) Loved your book!

jodhi -- it is perfectly OK to be insane :)

Someone has already recommended NanoWriMo, and I'd like to echo that. I'd also like to recommend Chris Baty's book - No Plot? No Problem! It's designed to take the write-a-novel-in-a-month experience of NaNoWriMo and recreate it in any 30 day period. My Katie-&-Armando moment came in the last week of NaNoWriMo last year. Find whatever it is for you and challenge yourself to do a certain amount of it - reasonable but ambitious - for a month. See how you feel - I highly recommend it!

Go ahead and write Katie and Armando's story, even if it doesn't end well. Those kinds of stories resonate longer than the "happily ever after" stories anyway.

After all, Brokeback Mountain and Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon are among my favorite romances.

I love it when a writer can craft the one simple sentence, the one line that gives the back story and the motivation. Here is is for me, with Kate:

'Her entire life was neatly summed up in one ranch-style corner lot in the suburbs.'

Wow. I know why she left.

There I was, cruising along reading, enjoying the cheese an awful lot, getting caught up in WHAT WILL SHE DO? and then...boom. The actual point of the post. Super powerful and a bull's eye, as usual! It's like you have some sort of ESP or something, the posts always seem to apply to all of us, no matter what is going on in our lives. You have a gift, sister...and thank you for the nudge. Much needed.

OK, your Katie and Armando need their own soap opera. I really want to know what happens next ... I do! Call me cheesy. Whatever.

there's this philosopher called Lacan who says that everybody needs a Katie and Armando to survive and know that they're they. Because what are we without our desires to be whole and complete and beautiful and smart and ... ?

Absolutely wonderful! I loved the way you tied it all together.

You know, Katie and Armando sound pretty palatable for the totally smutty book set- have you actually ever read one of those harlequin novels? I worked in the factory where they package them one summer during college, and I've got to say- you've got plenty of adjectives and just the right amount of cheese to hack it over there. Why not make Katie and Armando a real book? I'm sure harlequin would be interested- besides, you're an established author, why wouldn't they take a chance on you?

On a more serious note, Thanks for the reminder to live life today, for yourself- It's a powerful one.

I've been putting off going to a fitness spa, because I'm worried about being too fat! How silly is that?

Also, I was offered a chance to help write a play being produced this summer. I just sent an email yesterday to the director begging off, because...I'm afraid to sit in a room with other writers and try and contribute. WTF?

A timely note - thanks!

Learning to knit was something I was going to do someday, when I had time, when I had finished my other projects, when oh when I don’t know when. Then someone taught me to cast on and make a scarf. And then I went on the internet to learn more. And then I found Crazy Aunt Purl. And then I learned about a thing called a “Blog”. And then CAP taught me how to make a hat. And then I made dozens of dozens of hats. And then I taught other people to make hats. Thank you…..

Great post, Laurie. Spot on as usual - I am as guilty as any of the "wait until I'm perfect" school of procrastination. Thanks for the pep-talk; I will try to conquer this.

- Pam

Fabulous post! Thanks for the brilliant insight. You know just how to sock it to a person, which seems to be a particular talent of yours: using your words in a non-preachy, down to earth way that gets a really great, thoughtful point across.

I'm alllll about signs. All about 'em.

I just saw the movie "Once", and the writer was talking about how the irish use the word "once" alot. Once I get this done, I'll do this. Once we get settled here, we'll do such and such. Which is kind of what the movie is about. Not being motivated, always procrastinating.

People ask me why I'm not playing music anymore. And my response is always "Once I get my originals recorded, I'll start playing out again..." Why? What difference does that make? Why can't I play out now, and still make the recording?

This post has just reinforced the fact that I'm procrastinating. I need to get on it. Thanks for the foot in my ass.

In "Through the Looking Glass," Alice, once more in wonderland, and at a whole new mad teaparty, asks for jam.

She is told that "the rule is jam yesterday or jam tomorrow, but never jam today."

Lewis Carroll is making fun of people who live in their memories, or are always planning for a perfect future that they never live.

When I had a license plate, it used to say "JAM2DAY."

I've spent most of my life trying to live up to that.

I'm waiting til my dog is gone to put in hardwood floors and buy new furniture for the family room. I love the dog, but he's messy and smelly and sheds like crazy. And he will scratch up my new floors. He's eight now, so probably not that much longer to wait. That sounds just awful, I know, but I'm a realist.

Why yes, I do have my own "Katie & Armando"s. Like singing in public, maybe even professionally. And redecorating my house. I keep saying I don't have enough money and/or time, and those are serious considerations, but I also have to wonder if I'm just scared.

BTW, I agree--that story may be cheesy, but I've read much worse published!

You are an awsome writer. My life is a soap opera and I just wish sometimes I could put some of it down on paper. Keep writing, I enjoy the blog!

OK - I'll say it - I want to read more of Katie & Armando! And I'm not normally a romance kinda gal. Maybe I've been single too long? There are all types of publishing houses, especially for romance novels... even if you wanted to spice it up a bit, I have a friend who writes erotic novels under a nom-de-plume, makes quite a nice living.

Having said that... Wow. What a great post. Butbutbut - I need to set up a website *first* before I offer reiki treatments.

Not.

You really gave me a lot to think about - in a good way. I am a total procrastinator. Always waiting for things to line up perfect. I think I will think about it later. HAHAHA!

Me, too. Waiting. Waiting. For what?
Thanks for the wake-up call!
(and the comments today are extraordinary. I want the JAM2DAy license plate, too!)

Y'know, I didn't think it was that cheesy. The part about sniffing him in the back was just right!

As for pleasure postponed, I just got cable and I have been hoovering up episodes of HGTV and now, after 3 weeks, the homeselling/home-staging programs are making me crazy - WHY do all that beautiful work only before you sell? Pressure wash the roof TODAY! Paint the living room TODAY! Redo the kitchen TODAY! not two weeks before you sell! No! TODAY is the day!

I am sooooo hooked I want to know what happens!!!!

I am still trying to stop putting off stuff I want to do. Life is too short

Finishing my solo CD and actually getting it out there to the public, writing a book, and living on a farm full of horses. Those are mine.

I think you should finish Katie & Armando. It could be cathartic, and it's a good story. (Cheesey? I doubt it... but cheese is good... I like cheese.)

Now if you'll excuse me, I have some recording to do.

I was there once - - a LONG time ago, when I was married to my first husband. I was waiting for things to get better, for him to say he still loved me, waiting for him to treat me like I was his equal instead of his 'property' . . . until finally, I couldn't wait any longer. And I left.

It was the hardest and SCARIEST thing I had ever done, but it was also the best thing I could have done.

I am celebrating 22 years of marriage with my second husband, a WONDERFUL man, who is my best friend, my life partner, and my soul mate.

If I had not taken that 'leap of faith' and struck out on my own, I would never have met this dear, wonderful husband of mine, and would never have known the meaning of true happiness and what it meant to really LIVE my life!

Thanks for sharing, Laurie. It means a lot to me!

I'm waiting until I'm married to live in China again. I loved the year I lived there, but craved the emotional and moral support that a spouse can provide. Sometime, though, I think it's going to be a long time until I return to China. It's been 2 years since I moved back to the States, and I crave the sights, sounds, and pace of Beijing so much I ache....

Why am I hesitating?.......

...i am thinking we now have a little insight into why you kept francisco around so long...
"Franny, will you kidnap me?"

I think I am Katie. Really, I can give you lots and lots of details for your story...details from my life. Great start you have there!

I need to know what happens with Katie and Armando!!! Seriously, you have to write this book. Seriously.

I'm still waiting to become a rock star. No, seriously. I am a singer and while my church loves that I sing just about every week with the praise band, I'm still waiting for the right band to come along and wisk me off to Nashville or something. Is that sad or what??? I mean, I know I have talent, but what band is at my church in my little town just on the off chance that they're looking for a middle-aged chubby lady to front their band??? Seriously, I need to get on with it and make my own dreams. Thanks for the wake up!

I want to know what happens, too, really I do!

Reading your post today reminded me that you might enjoy a book I recently read. It is called The Power of Kindness by Piero Ferrucci. My take on it is that it covers the things we need to find in ourselves, like respect, forgiveness, honesty etc, so that we may be kind. This post of yours is very similar to one of the chapters. And no, I am in no way related to this book, I just recommend it to almost everyone.

Thank you!

Well, I was hooked midway through the second sentence and I don't read fiction. I've never understood "cheesy" as a pejorative. Cheese, with the possible exception of Velveeta, is rich, wholesome, satisfying and often luxurious. I'm either going to find my former fighting self or implode and I'd be grateful right now for the strength to do either but tomorrow is another day. Ok, I did read that fiction. Speaking of which, if you haven't seen it rent "Stranger Than Fiction" with Will Ferrell, Emma Thompson and Dustin Hoffman. Great writing, terrific performances and a definitive essay on unrealized dreams

Hi, I'm a little late with this comment. It is about your camera taking blurry photos. The first digital camera I bought had a flash that had to be physically engaged by pushing a button and then it would pop up. I didn't realize this for quite a while, okay, I didn't realize it until my brother pointed it out to me when I complained about my blurry photos. Certainly this can't be your problem. I just thought I'd mention it, in case.

Jan, loyal reader, infrequent commentor

Painting, drawing, and vegetable gardening. For the latter, that'd require a distant move. We have no sun, and even if we cut down all the trees and our whole neighborhood's trees, we would still have no sun. I found a tiny patch of sun in our yard and will fence it against deer and try growing a single cherry tomato or a single square watermelon! I'd love to resolve to get rid of asthma, my real greatest dream, but it's stuck with me for the long haul like a 50 year-old bad check that keeps bouncing back every month. Oh, yeah . . . "Armando"? That reminds me, Laurie, whatever REALLY happened to good ol' Francisco?! ("I am Francisco!") Do tell--did he really just disappear?

Some day I will... travel more. Enjoy life. Lately I haven't been doing much of either.

I am married, 3 fantastic kids. But I am missing out on the personal JOY for life I thought I would feel at this point. I got everything I wanted so why am I so disappointed?

I stuck it out for 10 years with a partner who loved wine and beer (and a lot of it!) more than he loved me. After my Granny died my other Granny told me how when she'd congratulated the first one on achieving 60 years of marriage (not the happiest) she'd said "I wish I'd never started..." I didn't want to be looking back in that situation so I got rid of him. I started going out with someone else who I knew was the best but he was scared to commit. Then a friend of mine was diagnosed with lung cancer and died 7 weeks later. I told my new bloke that it was no point hanging about and unless he was willing to admit that we had huge potential as a couple I was going. It was time to stop being scared that he might screw it up in the future as that's an unknown quantity. Instead it was time to do it NOW and get on with it. I was just a tad terrifed but he said "you're right" and it's gone from strength to strength ever since. Now, I just need to sort out the new job but I'm actively doing that. It might be a cliche but life is too short to hang about so you might as well live it now.

WOW!!!

I used to, and sometimes still do slip into a Walter Mitty fantasy world where I am doing all sorts of interesting and glamorous things with exciting people and of course gorgeous men. It occured to me a few years ago that I could actually do some of those things in my real life on a smaller scall. The gorgeous men still seem to elude me but I think when my Armando does walk into my life my bags will be packed and I will be ready to go.

Looky here missy! This is Katie, and I need to know what happens in the rest of the story!!!!

I just finished your book, it rocks! You are such a cool person!

You are the kick in the seat that so many women need. I have finally stopped waiting for the "perfect" relationship and the "perfect" guy to make my "perfect" family with. I'm just living life to the fullest now. I'm travelling by myself this summer and I'm learning stuff I've always wanted to learn but never did b/c I didn't think that skill would amount to much. I'm even making a drastic change in my career next fall that I think will make me happier (and more sane) but up until recently wasn't able to admit that this was a change I needed to make.

And I have to say that I would read the Katie and Armando story if you wrote it. I want to know how it ends! Maybe even if it's not a "happy ending" for the 2 of them Katie could realize she doesn't need a stinkin' guy and begin a whole series of crazy, erotic adventures :)

Toe up socks. Maybe on 2 circular needles. That's what I've been putting off trying. It's always so easy to slip into my old top-down sock pattern, but it's time to get out of my rut and try something new.

I have had some events in my life over the last ten years that just hammer home that life is very short and you'd best live it now. I try every day to do that -- even the days that seem mundane. Sometimes life just isn't this huge excitement that the media tries to jam down our throats in commercials and such. (I will never have the perfect home, car, body, boobs. But neither do the people in the commercials!) But you know what? I find that taking pleasure in the very simple things: sunrise, ice cream, my garden, taking myself out to dinner, a long walk with a friend's dog -- these things can make an ordinary life extraordinary.

If you cultivate joy in your life with the little things, it gives you the confidence to strike out and try the big things.

At 48 (me) and 52 (my boyfriend), we also said, "What are we waiting for?" and bought a 35' catamaran that we closed on this weekend. Yep, we're quiting our jobs and we're going to live on a boat. Are we nuts or what? Do you know how hard it is to make a choice like that these days? Medical coverage, insurances, his captains license!!But if we don't do it now, we never will. Actually, even though we're quiting our jobs, we are going to be chartering this boat,kind of like a B&B on the water, so believe me we will be working, but hopefully at something we like.

oooh, bring on the cheese! I am already hooked on Katie and Armando.
Just by putting your own out there, You are helping so many of us find our katie and Armando!

I could maybe help you write some Katie and Armando, because I'm living it now. It is indeed most excellent. Don't give up on them. I'd read their story - really!

Also? The 'live' today' is perhaps the best bit of edvice anyone can ever give or receive. Thank you for putting the message out there!

My Katie and Armando story is written except for the last chapter. It's been sitting in a drawer for 4 years - in stasis. Katie is growing cobwebs in her 'china. I have a list of excuses as to why I don't finish it, but the undercurrent is fear. I'm afraid to succeed. I'm afraid to fail. I'm afraid of being a one hit wonder. What if people start EXPECTING things from me? I don't LOOK like a romance writer - the picture on the back cover will put people off. Will my fat stature disappoint my readers when I do book signings?

Is very difficult to gird the loins in this internal battle. Good on you for cresting that hill.

I did NaNoWriMo a couple of years ago. I started a story, which wasn't the story I wanted to write but more of a practice story. I learned the things I wanted to become familiar with and then did nothing. Sometimes it is hard, because I get all of my best ideas when I walk or run and then usually forget them by the time I get to my notebooks.

My 'Katie and Aramando' is called 'The King on Tara Hill'. It's over 200,000 words long, which is 500+ pages in ten point font with 1.5 spacing (if I doublespace, the Kinkos bill gets too high!) and has eaten up countless hours of my life over the past six or so years. Maybe more. I don't want to think about it.

November is National Novel Writing Month! (www.nanowrimo.org) NaNovelists are as crazy as knitters, if not more so.

I forgot to add:

My father has always been a "why don't you do it now?" person, and so all of my "somedays" fall into the categories of 'I don't really need and only passingly want this, and it's way the hell out of my budget' (those are the 'someday, when I'm rich and famous' things), and 'I would like to do this, but I am so freaking busy doing all of the other things that I want to do that I don't have time'.

Whenever I tell me father "I'd like to...", then he will say "Well, why not?". I will come up with an obstacle ("I don't have time.") he will brush it away ("If it's really important to you, you can make time."). I will come up with another obstacle ("But it will take up too much space!"). He will brush it away. ("Sam loves to move furniture and you love to donate your stuff. You can make space.") And so on, until all of the obstacles are gone, and I'm forced to admit that it's do or die. Do I -really- want this?

After years of these discussions, I've internalized them, which is how the above novel came into being, why I learned to knit and spin, and why I have two cats crammed into a one bedroom apartment.

That was EXACTLY what I needed to read today. I've spent two months waiting for my workload to decrease so that I can have more time for "life," but whenever I do get that time, I don't treat it as life, because my workload hasn't decreased, so *clearly* it can't be real life yet.
And I am all for ending sentences with prepositions. I cry a little bit inside at work every time I have to fix a sentence that ends with a preposition .

I pledge to buy you katie and armando book - I'm hooked already

I'm waiting for the new Stephanie Plum book (due out in June Fearless 14) and now I'm waiting for the new Katie & Armando book too - I imagine with that black duffel there will be some swashbuckling of some sort.

You are a tremendous writer - pictures and feelings flood my mind and heart. Do write about Katie and Armando - everyone knows them and wants to read about them, especially with your insight and compassion.

As much as I've internalized changes and am taking up my space on this waterball...I still have some areas in which I 'wait to lose weight' ... go back to the doctor about stuff, buy darling clothes (no matter what), keep the hair-do happy/cool, walk (no matter who else is out there jogging/running and who in the heck is looking at ME anyway!!). I wait for work to chill so I'm not so tired to play piano constently, draw consistently, travel some, paint/decorate my office. Thank you for the wakeup.

You wrote Katie and Armondo from the perspective of a woman who has been there. I recognize it because I was there myself (except for the Ernie). My heart broke for Katie while she waited and my heart breaks for the me I was 20 years ago.

I am waiting until I declutter and deep-clean my dining room before I learn (teach myself) to make quilts. I don't want to begin quilting before, because that is where I'll be working and I need the space (and cleanliness) to begin. I'm not decluttering/cleaning because I think I doubt my ability to learn quilting and this way I won't know that I I failed at it.

Yes, you should definitely finish Katie and Armando.

But make it complicated! It can start out cheesy (for the record, I thought it was well-written and honest and complex and not the slightest bit cheesy - women talk themselves into things like this all the time) but maybe you give it a noir twist?

My sister and I were talking about career paths we'd never taken. I had convinced myself I wasn't smart enough to be a lawyer. Well, I recently had to sue my former landlord for my security deposit in small claims court and got it back plus 2x the amount in damages, so who's the dummy? (He even had a lawyer for the appeal and I still won.)

I've always said I was "bad" at math - but I got Bs in college and even tested out of nearly a year of college-level calculus. Since when is that "bad" at math? So I'm going to take an accounting course this fall - maybe it'll turn into a second/third career.

We women can talk ourselves out of the darndest things sometimes, based on faulty perceptions.

Oh I love Katie and Armondo. Reminds me of the fantasy/story I used to imagine when I was stuck in a horrible job, a disintegrating relationship, and a disappointing life. There was a guy at work who rode a Harley and I imagined getting on the bike with him and riding into the sunset and leaving all the crap behind.

Endings have a way of surprising you. Fifteen years later I married him. It's been a great ride.

I do a lot of the "I'll do that when I'm rich and famous" stuff myself. (For example, odds are I'll never move to Hawaii without a lot of money, and it's just not swingable from where I am now.) Not sure what to make of that.

I think in the end though, I'm the opposite of PurpleKat (hi, PurpleKat!), in that when it comes to the do or die, I tend to die, or realize that I don't want to do the massive amounts of work to get whatever the thing is that I think I want. I don't know what that means, though. Do I just not really want *anything*? Am I waiting for The Right Thing I Want to come along? Or does it all just seem too hard for me to do, so I stop wanting it?

Argh. Oh well, at least noveling seems like it's attainable and something I want, even if I spend a lot of time not writing because I get obsessed with knitting or something else instead.

Timing! I've always been told I'm a good writer, inherited from my (brilliant) newspaperman daddy, &c. "You have the Gift"; "your stories are brilliant"; you're such a good writer"....but I've never buckled down to learn the business end - do I need an agent? how do I get one? where do you start? what shall I do with these stories? (I write short fantasy-faerie-tale-for-kids-who-may-be-older type stuff.) So I made myself a Birthday Resolution: "Now you're 65, this is the year you PUBLISH!" Then I found a creative writing class at the local tech school...then a special knitting friend gave me *three writing books* for said birthday...then I wrote a couple of things again -- then my little CAPeleh wrote about doing it today, not tomorrow...So this is IT: TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL!" No, wait - no, no, that's something else. How about "this is the year we publish!" (Heck, Laura Ingalls Wilder published first at age 65 too, although her daughter was a publisher...) As USUAL - you're an inspiration. Thank you, my precious little CAPeleh....

Laurie, reading the snippets of Katie and Armando was FANTASTIC! Please, please you've got to be kind to your loyal readership and turn this into a book! Just think, if you have this much going around in your head, this story is begging to be written.

P.S.: Do you realize how therapeutic your blog is? At least for me anyways. Don't stop writing.

Laurie, you always know how to make me smile. I save reading your blog for days when I feel tired, grumpy or just plain uninspired. Your writing brings a spark to those days. Thanks for the little pick-me-up. :)

Ouch. That was timely for me. A simple conversation lead to a huge marriage-dissecting day yesterday, and some big decisions to be made by me. It's not easy to know what I want, but I do know now I have to make the decision that is right for ME, no-one else. I'm not sure what that decision will be yet, but I'll get there. Thanks Laurie. x

Honey-baby,

You were BORN knowing how to knit. Your hands just had to catch up!

My wait? My postponement? My excuse? I'm waiting til I move to Palm Springs, to a nicer apartment, one with a dishwasher and air conditioning. I live in a dump right now and can barely be bothered to keep it clean, let alone nest or learn yoga or cooking or knitting here. I feel guilty for putting my life on hold...but I cannot be bothered to live my life here. Am I a failure for that?

Ah, as cheesy as that was, now I want to read the entire story! That was pretty good - you write cheese well. hee hee

Thanks for the reminder on not putting our lives on hold. I agree with that but I need a reminder from time to time. We live in the present, that's all we have and we need to make to most of it.

You know, I read this too quickly, and scrolled to the bottom just as my friend was coming by to get lunch. And I thought Armando had stuffed Katie into the duffel bag.

Glad I came back and double-checked. Because there is cheese, and then there is Velveeta.

well leave us all HANGING why dontcha!

I think Katie and Armando can be left right where they are - a perfect ending. Imagination does the rest ;-)
What *am* I waiting for? Why don't I just go get it? Possibly cos I don't know what *it* is?
BTW, at least one Aussie friend is not so far away any more....