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November 5, 2007

Welcome to Old Lady

Me (humming and also singing but not realizing I am doing it): Welcome to Miami, bienvenos a Miami...

Friend who is Cute, but Very Young: What are you singing?

Me: Was I singing? I don't sing.

Friend: Yeah, you're telling me.

Me: Har har you're a real jokester. No, I'm just thinking about my trip to Miami and every time I think of it I get that song in my head! You know the one ... Welcome to Miami, Bienvenidos a Miami...

Friend: ...? No?

Me: You know! The Will Smith song, about Miami!

Friend: ...?

Me: Oh come on, it was all over MTV a few years ago, when he did that song about Summertime and then the Miami song.

Friend: You mean THE Will Smith, the actor?

Me: Well, yeah but before he was THE Will Smith, he was the Fresh Prince. You know, Parents Just Don't Understand?

Friend: Just don't understand what? Who's the fresh mints?

Me: The Fresh PRINCE. Come on! Don't tell me you don't remember DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince?

Friend: Who is that?

Me: Don't tell me this is news to you. ARGH. Before Will Smith was THE Will Smith, when he was on The Fresh Prince of Bel Air...?

Friend: Never heard of it.

Me: Oh my God tell me again what year you were born in?

Friend: 198* [Editor's Note: I am editing here as you can see, because the shame is too much to bear.]

Me: Oh God. You were like, in preschool or something during the reign of the Fresh Prince. As God Is My Witness let us never speak of this again.

Friend: I want to hear this Miami song, I can't believe Will Smith did a song.

Me: He didn't just do a song, he had ALBUMS. Do you know what ALBUMS are?

Friend: Is this going to be like the time you got mad because I didn't know who that Mia Sparrow chick was?


Friend: It's OK, you're pretty cute for an old lady.

(Physical violence ensues, wherein I am triumphant using Fall Vogue as a powerful weapon.)

Me: Just for the record, on Friday I am going to MIAMI, bienvenidos a Miami, and I plan to meet Puff Daddy and never speak to you again!!

Friend: Good luck with that. Heh, Will Smith on a TV show. YEAH RIGHT.

- - -

The end.

Posted by laurie at November 5, 2007 4:03 PM