November 5, 2007
Welcome to Old Lady
Me (humming and also singing but not realizing I am doing it): Welcome to Miami, bienvenos a Miami...
Friend who is Cute, but Very Young: What are you singing?
Me: Was I singing? I don't sing.
Friend: Yeah, you're telling me.
Me: Har har you're a real jokester. No, I'm just thinking about my trip to Miami and every time I think of it I get that song in my head! You know the one ... Welcome to Miami, Bienvenidos a Miami...
Friend: ...? No?
Me: You know! The Will Smith song, about Miami!
Me: Oh come on, it was all over MTV a few years ago, when he did that song about Summertime and then the Miami song.
Friend: You mean THE Will Smith, the actor?
Me: Well, yeah but before he was THE Will Smith, he was the Fresh Prince. You know, Parents Just Don't Understand?
Friend: Just don't understand what? Who's the fresh mints?
Me: The Fresh PRINCE. Come on! Don't tell me you don't remember DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince?
Friend: Who is that?
Me: Don't tell me this is news to you. ARGH. Before Will Smith was THE Will Smith, when he was on The Fresh Prince of Bel Air...?
Friend: Never heard of it.
Me: Oh my God tell me again what year you were born in?
Friend: 198* [Editor's Note: I am editing here as you can see, because the shame is too much to bear.]
Me: Oh God. You were like, in preschool or something during the reign of the Fresh Prince. As God Is My Witness let us never speak of this again.
Friend: I want to hear this Miami song, I can't believe Will Smith did a song.
Me: He didn't just do a song, he had ALBUMS. Do you know what ALBUMS are?
Friend: Is this going to be like the time you got mad because I didn't know who that Mia Sparrow chick was?
Me: Mia FARROW.
Friend: It's OK, you're pretty cute for an old lady.
(Physical violence ensues, wherein I am triumphant using Fall Vogue as a powerful weapon.)
Me: Just for the record, on Friday I am going to MIAMI, bienvenidos a Miami, and I plan to meet Puff Daddy and never speak to you again!!
Friend: Good luck with that. Heh, Will Smith on a TV show. YEAH RIGHT.
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Posted by laurie at November 5, 2007 4:03 PM