Yeah, glad you got a nice vacation! I think I might be first, holy smokes that would be amazing! Have you made any chex mix yet with the balsamic vinegar? I'm getting the stuff for mine this payday. Can't wait!

Molly, in cold, cold east Texas

I tried splicing commas, but they kept coming apart and turning into tadpoles. What's the secret to good comma splicing?

Hey, Laurie, I don't have any questions about writing but I wanted to say I'm happy that you had a wonderful Thanksgiving with your family! I did, too, I was in Denver with my brother and we had snow! And I met my little grand-nephew for the first time. He will be one year old next month.

I love your dad's container thingy, the Lone Star design. Do you know where he got it? Also, is making enchiladas at holidays a Texas thing? I know lots of people here who make tamales at this time. I had a boss who used to bring tamales from a place in Dallas to our potlucks at work. And I've been thinking lately of doing the same thing myself.

I make the best cornbread, too! If your dad makes the best then mine is probably second best, hee hee. Southern style, meaning no sugar and no flour and baked in a cast-iron skillet. Mmmmmm!

I look forward to reading about writing. I'm in the middle of the Dreaded Dissertation -- no, in the middle makes it sound like I've made progress and that's not quite accurate. The writing that I'm doing these days is not at all entertaining or fun or something anybody really wants to read. It's a chore that I must finish so I can write (and read) for fun again!

I'm a loud typer too. Makes my mother crazy when I'm in a room with her. My boss has commented on it as well, but he doesn't mind as it lets him keep tabs on my productivity -- or so he thinks!! ;)

Holy crap, am I first?

Okay, here's the main question. How did you get from all of us bugging you to writing a book to actually someone saying, "Yes, we'll pay you to write a book"? :)

Glad you enjoyed a bit of a break!

I totally have a question! I like to write as well, but my kinda writing just invovles lists. Oh man, I'm a list writer like nobody's business! I do however get a tired hand and sometimes when I go back, I can't recognize the word by either from the handwriting or by the "shorthand by Judi" version.

I'm getting wordy, just call me Laurie........ my question is......... do you do the same?

Leeny -- you just described my dad's cornbread to a "T"!!!

I don't know where he got that Texas flag refrigerated bag, but I'll ask him when I call him tonight.

We usually have a pretty traditional Thanksgiving, but this year it was enchiladas by request of my Aunt Pam. They were a huge hit!

Also, I meant to add that I love, love, love the pictures from the contest! So adorable!

Ok, not first, but pretty darned close!

Hi Laurie,
I just had a sudden urge to try to convince you to send an autographed copy of you book to Mr. X so he can eat his heart out at your fabulousness. You're prolly way too evolved to delight in such tomfoolery, but I thought I'd suggest it anyway.

OH AND, though I do spell y'all with the apostrophe in the "right" place, I think your placement works too. I mean, really, in the grand scheme of life does it matter enough to boycott a blog? Alas, no y'alls or ya'lls in the dissertation.

Laurie,
So much of what you wrote about is so very personal. Many people would not want the world to know such personal, emotional things because they would feel embarrassed that they were "dumped," and also would not want "Mr X" to have the knowledge (read: power) that he was able to cause so much pain. Most people want to keep that sort of thing private. Why did you decide to make it public knowledge? I am not trying to be critical--I think you are very brave and strong to be able to do this.

Yea for loud typing. My favorite typing sound has got to be the old IBM Selectic. With the little ball that spins around? Fabulousness. If I could just get a keyboard with that sound I'd be willing to reply to my emails with more than a four word sentence...

I've got a writing question for you. I am a start and stop aspiring writer. I have actually gotten PAID to do it in the distant past, but that was before the three kids and my REAL LIFE showed up! I want to get back into it again, with an eye to eventually getting an MFA in Creative Writing, but my question is HOW? It is clear you have a busy life.....I have a busy life, and we both can't live without our needles and yarn. How do you balance the life thing, with the knitting thing, with the writing thing. Oh yeah, I'm an addicted reader, too. Thankfully, none of my kids are really small, but they do require attention once in a while (especially when they want food). How do you balance all this life stuff, and still do something productive in the writing world, too? If you have found a solution for this problem, you will be my Writing Goddess!

Laurie,
So much of what you write/wrote about is so very personal. Many people would not want the world to know such personal, emotional things because they would feel embarrassed that they were "dumped," and also would not want "Mr X" to have the knowledge (read: power) that he was able to cause you so much pain, or they might worry about what impression co-workers might get from all the talk about "dranking". Most people want to keep that sort of thing private. Why did you decide to make it public knowledge? I am not trying to be critical--I think you are very brave and strong to be able to do this. I guess if I ever decided to write something like this I would not use my real name. Too chicken I guess.

Beth... I was in Macy's with Faith a few weeks ago and they had their Christmas trees out and she and I got excited looking at this one set of amazing ornaments and I reached my hand out to touch the tree and all at once I remembered that he's on his... what? Third Christmas with his new wife? It was such a weird thing to have pop up out of nowhere. But it was even stranger, too, because I do hope he's happy. I've had all kinds of my own dreams come true, it's like our divorce set me free ... I got to write a book, and figure out who I really am, and learn how to make good friends and learn how to challenge all the boundaries I set for myself. I still suck at some things and cry too much (I leak at the eyeballs on a regular occasion) and I have a whole lot of stuff to work on, but overall I have a great, amazing life. And in some ways so much of that was because he left, you know? And because you decide to come out the other end of your Very Bad Time either being better or bitter. I was maybe half-and half at first, now I am more better LOL.

Oh, these are good questions :)

I don't think I would have ever even entertained the idea of doing a back-and-forth thing about writing if I hadn't gone on the tour, it seemed like every other question in the Q& A sessions was about writing in some way. Then MJ was so gracious with all *my* questions, it made sense that folks want to talk about something they love or are even just curious about.

Hi Laurie - Love. Your. Book. It is full of emotion and passion and life!!! My question is when you are writing, do you ever censor yourself?

Laurie,

As a blog celebrity, do you ever have problems with psycho readers tracking you down, AKA stalking you?? I started a blog a few months ago but I have not put any personal information on there because I have two fears: 1. Letting people I know see the soft side of me and 2. Being stalked.

I'm well aware that #2 makes me completely full of myself. But I am that person who HAS to close the curtains when it gets dark because PEOPLE WILL PEEPING TOM YOUR BUTT.

So, do you have stalker problems??

Thanks,
Courtney

I have a bad habit of writing a paragraph, then re-reading it, and re-writing it, and before you know it, the day is gone, and I haven't gone beyond the paragraph. I heard that you wrote your book pretty quickly. Did you plow through it, knowing that parts weren't perfect, but deciding to keep on moving, making a note to come back and fix it? I know there is a saying, "Writing is Re-Writing." Do you do extensive editing after you are done with your first draft? C'mon, Laurie, tell us the truth! -- I can't believe that all your great writing comes to you without SOME effort!

Great! My question comes right after the stalker comment!

Laurie, just listened to the podcast from Knitpicks, and you sound just as I thought you would, very cute and just a little southern. Great interview. I don't write, so no questions, just to say good job on the tour, don't know how you do it all, but sounds like you are managing to keep all in perspective.
My new favorite thing(that prolly most people would not get because I can be weird sometimes)the new CD from Alison Krauss and Robert Plant(yes, the one from Led Zeppelin). I bet your little southern self would like it.

Thanks for your response Laurie, tis better to be better than bitter, alas. god bless your self-helpy self.

Ditto on Alyson and Neil's questions.

And I like your "bitter or better" comment. Having been separated for 5 years, I'm finally becoming better. It's the only way to be truly happy.

Laurie, I now have no doubt that we WERE separated at birth. I have the exact same ailment -- total chaos inside me until words come out through the index and bird fingers of both hands and also my right thumb for the space bar. I am a self taught, fast typist who thinks words right out through my hands but who cannot touch type to save my life, and who learned on an OLD Royal manual typewriter and also, I type loud right there with ya; and as for the spliced commas and run-on sentences, that's just part of being a Southern writer, just ask William Faulkner how he managed to write a sentence a whole page long in tiny print. I dare ya.

As for editorializing and participating in your journalism, that's not bad journalism. That's Hunter Thompson journalism. Gonzo on, girl.

I keep a copy of Stephen King's "On Writing" at my bedside. Writer's Bible, that.

But I do actually have a question: getting a publisher! Getting someone to take the time to LOOK at my work! Do share.

And I am SO glad you had such a nice visit with your folks.

Happy Thanksgiving to you, Laurie! Sounds like you had the perfect long holiday weekend. Your parents are so cute, and isn't it fabulous that your dad is such a gourmet! Does he teach cooking classes? I'd attend - seriously! Have spices, will travel! And in style with that lovely Texas flag tote bag. And your Grandma (also so cute!)must be so proud of you!

Is there some website where we can all post pictures of obnoxious drunken drivers? Sorry you had to endure his crap, but thanks for doing a public service by publishing his photo. We can now be on the lookout for him.

Thanks also for posting all the Cat Sweater photos - my little niece & nephew had such fun looking at them on Thanksgiving. They were thoroughly entertained and kept out of the kitchen while the grown ups attempted to cook.

On writing...I'm in constant awe of people who are good writers, and as one who doesn't write, I don't have an intelligent question to ask you. Just a comment...keep on writing! However you do it, your book was wonderful. Hope #2 is on it's way soon.

Changing the subject, I braved the mall at 6am Friday, found nothing worth waiting in line to pay for, and drifted into the L'Occitane store where I indulged myself and purchased the product you rave so much about, the Almond Shower Oil. All I can say is....WOW !! It's the best little slice of luxury & pampering on the whole planet. Thanks, Laurie, for the most awesome recommendation ever! I will feel silky, smoothy and non-scaly even in the worst dry winter weather. And smell yummy, too!

Very cool!

Also, re:MJ Rose. I just had to tell you my silly southern girl story. I went to get her latest book (The Reincarnationist), but for some reason my mind keeps wanting to call it Reintarnation! Oops.

Laurie,
I saw the ad for the Knitpicks interview and while I haven't listened yet, wanted to come by and say "HEY! I saw an ad for an interview with you on Knitpicks!!"

but then Michelle in Co beat me to it. *sigh*

(And Neil, you're hilarious. I'd let you stalk me anytime. But mostly that's because I stalk you. Good thing we live 2000 miles apart.)

My writing question would be the same as Tracie's. It seems the big leap to go from normal mortals like us encouraging you to write the book to the point where someone with MONEY actually PUBLISHES it and presumably PAYS YOU for it. (which is totally awesome and I'm glad I bought one, so $.14 cents of that royalty check is from me. Just saying.)

OK. Clearly, I'm wordy too.

Your evening with your folks sounds fantastic - I am so glad you are having a chance to slow down and rest up (and of course, blog...because we are all addicted and can't go tooo terribly long without a new post!). My writing question echos the others who asked how you find a publisher in the event that you actually finish a book. Not that I have finished one, heavens no, but I have started several really bad ones. One thing I have figured out is that I am good at telling a story if I know what the story is that I am trying to tell, but coming up with said story is the challenge. Perhaps I should try non-fiction instead! Anyhoo, what is the secret to getting picked up by a publisher...I have heard how they get thousands of random manuscripts sent to them each year and throw most of them away unread...

Hi sweetie!! I'm so glad that you had a wonderful weekend with your folks. I LOVED your interview with Kelley from Knit Picks; could you be any cuter?? You are a great interviewee! (wee??)

Here's my question: did HCI contact you with an idea for the book?? What was your initial reaction to their offer?? And how in the hell did you keep it secret from all of us???

yes i saw a comment someone left about y'all vs ya'll... some people need to get a life, because WHO CARES?

I didn't realize that ya'll was such an imperative matter. How do you manage such explosive controversy in your wordy stuff? Also how did you get to be 30&practice without learning Thirty-one?

Clacky keyboard lovers unite! (and dang aren't they getting hard to find???)

Okay I have a question or three but you have to promise not to laugh and can I follow up if you answer these questions? How did you handle the fear? Were you afraid to start? I am. Very much. I make notes, I write and I'm terrified. I don't know what to do with what I've written, where to go or any of that. Um. I guess that's actually only one question. Okay wait, here's another. How did you find a publisher? Agent first then publisher or did you just submit the manuscript?

TOTALLY OFF TOPIC

Meant to share this with you awhile back as I thought you'd enjoy it.

We were in Florida visiting my husband's folks and we drove by a restaurant called "Coq au Vin" and they had one of those message signs out front that read: "Bon appétit Y'all"

...and of course I though of you with your Southerness and love of all things French! :-)

How do you play Thirty-One?

Rules for playing 31: see URL

http://www.cribbage.ca/card-games/thirty-one.htm

This post is so sweet. I would love to read what you have to say about writing!

One time, I wrote to Christine Feehan (love her!) asking her what I could do to be a better writer. She actually wrote me back(3 months later) to tell me I should just write everyday until it's a part of me. And then maybe joining a writers guild would help.

I don't think I could ever write a book though. I thought about fiction, but my imagination, as awesome as it is, can't come up with anything I'd find suitable.

I thought about maybe writing a book about my life, but then I thought, "who would even read that?!?!" nothing has really happened in my life that would compel people to read about it.

And I'm not a very eloquent person. (nevermind that I just used the word "eloquent" to define my unwordiness!)

I suppose if I were to ask a *real live author!!* something, it would be "what keeps you going?" I mean, when you have those doubts?

PS- 31 is an awesome game!!!

Here is my question about writing...it doesn't start off as a question but it will get there...

I always think of things to write at the oddest times, like when I'm cleaning the bathroom or I'm out for a walk. In other words, never when I'm near some sort of writing impliment or computer.

Do you think of things to write about at weird moments when you can't get them out of your head? If so, what do you do to recall them later when you can either write them down on paper or type them on the computer?

It sounds like you had an awesome weekend with your family. I love reading your posts about them because they seriously sound like they are the most fun to be around.

Jennifeer

Ah yes, but do you know the special 31 song you have to sing when you get an automatic? ;-)

Whoa! Here I was thinking 31 was totally a Midwestern thing since nobody ever seems to know how to play it. Plus, look at you guys being all high rollers- in my family we use nickels. Hahaha.

I also want to know if you have a problem with getting stalked? Or do you have no fear because you already live in scary California where everyone is allocated a personal stalker upon moving there...?

So... the person who said they won't read your blog until you fix your y'alls... how will they know if you 'fix' them if the stop reading the blog? (see logic=teeny tiny loop of no logic on their part)
You just keep all-y'all'n as you see fit! Love reading every bit of it.
so, writing question: do you work from an outline or in chapter order? How do you decide what goes in the outline/chapter order/book?

Ahem.
Ya = you, right?
And the shortened version of "you all" is You'll, not yo'all, right?
Hence, Ya'll is correct (or at least makes more sense...)

This was something silly that I obsessively wondered about the book:

Did you have to get Mr X's permission to write about him, the relationship and divorce? (Particularly since you used his actual name vs Mr X.) And if so, how did that coversation go?

I understand the feeling of having something inside that just won't go away until you act on it. With you, it sounds like it's writing. With me, it's making something, knitting or sewing or gardening or cooking something. For me lately, it's been knitting. I think the creative process is the same no matter what it's expression is.

Gah...why can't the whole world be spellchecked? Sorry for the typo(s)...even with the correct fingers.

Where do you get your ideas?

Kidding! Only kidding! Quit throwing those zucchini, for pity's sake!

I used to keep a journal, but I don't any more. Maybe I should. A private one, I mean, besides the blog, which I haven't updated for an embarrassingly long time. I've always been complimented on my writing, and yet I have trouble putting it all out there just the way I want to say it. I think it takes working at.

But then pretty much everything does, doesn't it?

A belated happy Thanksgiving to you!

Oh, and about spell-checking: I don't pick spelling or grammar nits out loud unless I'm getting paid for it or I'm specifically asked to do so, except once in a while I'll go a little nutty and spout off about the difference between "hoard" and "horde," and my feeling that if more professional journalists and newspaper editors knew it, the world would be a so much better place. I don't mention names, though.

Hi CAP,
I wonder how to get past the Fear of the Blank Page. I used to write all the time; like breathing, it was part of my life. Now, I stare at the page and am intimidated. As though everything I write HAS to be AMAZING (even though no one will ever read it but me).
Do you ever get intimidated by the blank page?

I used to keep journals too but when I read them now, they are just full of silly, claptrap about men who treated me badly. Now that I have a man who treats me well, that source of inspiration has dried up! LOL

I've taken creative writing courses and editing courses and loved them both, for different reasons. I love the structure of grammar and the the 'illogic' of the English language. So when you write "ya'll", I don't cringe ... much. :)

I don't write every day and I don't blog as often as I should because I find as I get older, I have less words. My writing style has gotten very succinct (love that word!) and I would probably make a better editor at this stage in my life.

Too bad it doesn't pay well ... LOL

I like to write, and am not half-bad according to a couple of old college profs, although don't have the pure talent that you possess, the talent to not only hit-the-nail-on-the-head about a situation or an emotion, but to also tell the story with more humor than many well-paid humor writers. That's sayin' somethin', girly!

I read (or heard?) recently that the old "write what you know adage" should really be "write what you FEEL", and I think that may be the key to your success. You bravely, accurately and beautifully document your emotions, and even more bravely share them with the world. What a thrifty approach to self-helpy-ness -- making the entire planet your therapy group! ;-)

I've always had trouble expressing myself verbally, (perhaps a form of brain damage?), but can do so fairly effortlessly through my fingertips-to-keyboard. Granted, it helps that I'm able to edit what I type before I hit the "Publish", "Send" or "Save" button. And like Neil, I tend to edit quite a bit while I'm writing, before I make the final version available for others to see. So, my question for you would be the same as his -- how much editing do you do before you publish a blog post? How long does it take you to write a typical blog post, one that doesn't involve pattern writing or lots of photo editing?

P.S. And it just about KILLS me when I can't go back and edit my comments here ... haha!

I don't have a question...just wanted to say that I would read anything you wrote, bad grammar and all. I used y'all on my blog yesterday. I can hardly believe i wasn't lynched by the grammar police.

Welcome back! Or should I say, "Welcome there", since you are not here. In Oregon. By the sinkhole.? Moving on...

I am writing a novel. There I said it in public. I joined National Novel Writing Month aka NanoWriMo.org and people all over the world are trying to write 50,000 words of a novel in one month, this month in fact. Even though the deadline is midnight on the 30th, I'm sure you can make it to 50,000 in 4 days with your flying three fingers of storytelling.

Mollysusie -- I can answer your question specifically here since it's not really a writing question LOL ;) His name was changed in the book, and we ran each word through legal, and again, and again. I also was extremely careful not to make the book about him or to belittle him or defame him, because that's not fair or moral, and I didn't think he deserved that. But we did spend a lot of money on the legalities of all this beforehand, and that's about all I can say on that one.

I look forward to reading all your answers, because anything I was wondering has been asked already...
But I will let you know something, I just wrote a wonderfully insightful, light, optomistic and clever post on my blog...and the computer ate it. I won't get it back. I am having hateful thoughts and have lost the urge to be pretty with words; now all I want to do is to be able to say, "Here are my pictures. You (the royal generic 'you'; not you, Laurie, 'you') don't even leave comments. So there. Stupid computer. (It's something about the connection; everything else is connected, but not my ability to post!) Grrrrr.
So please Laurie, tell us your 'process'; you (yes, the Laurie, 'you') are inspiring.

Ah, you often seem to post in tune with what I'm thinking! On the Tube on the way home tonight I almost ran out and switched lines so I could stop off at Charing Cross Road and buy myself a book on writing. I used to write a lot when I was younger - fiction I mean, oh and poetry, plays, the works - but seem to have lost the knack a bit since finishing high school. Now that I'm stuck in a job I hate because it pays about three times as much as anything else I could be doing, I need something else to keep me going!

Well I won't ask any questions though because I'm sure the others have it covered. Although I wouldn't mind if you answered the ones you already wrote in your post!

Hi, Laurie, well, I don't really have a question about writing, I just wanted to comment on what you said...."a direct line between the emotional center of my brain and my fingers..." I completely relate to that. I think people have to have an emotional outlet for all their thoughts & emotions, and for some people it is writing; for others, it could be drawing or photography, etc. It can be alot of different things and not always just one. Anyhow, that's all--I love your blog! Hope you get lots of good questions!

I find it absolutely fascinating that when I first starting reading your blog, maybe 20 people read it and posted comments and now you have to limit how many days you accept comments. You rock sista'
Ps How's the knitting?

Ilona, I had an idea for a hat today that I'm going to try swatching out on the bus tomorrow and I am SO FREAKING EXCITED about it!! My poor legwarmers are on the back burner again. Probably where they belong LOL.

Laurie;

I've always thought that I have a book somewhere inside of me, a story that I'd like to tell. How did you finally get the nerve to actually *write a book* vs. keeping random notes, logs, journals, etc? I'm terrified of actually starting the process, but I know that once I begin, I probably won't rest until my book is either complete, or in a landfill someplace.

BTW: Your book is awesome! For a first-time author, you're already a better writer than Dave Barry.

Once upon a time I was one of those kids who cringed in fear when my English teacher assigned a 200-word essay. Getting me to sit down and write? You'd think I was going in for a root canal without novacaine. I wouldn't even use contractions - "would not" is twice as many words as "wouldn't", ya know?

I was a sophomore in college when it all changed. I took Advanced Composition (skipping Basic and Intermediate because hey, it fit in my schedule better) and a wonderful professor named Marion Gremmels somehow unjammed that door that I thought could never be opened.

Now I find that sometimes I just get full of words and the only way to keep them from overflowing and making a huge mess is to grab a pencil or a keyboard and let 'em flow out! The most important lesson I learned in that class was that it doesn't matter what your rough draft looks like. No one is going to nit-pick a rough draft. So let it be chaotic and disorganized; that's its natural state. Get all those words out and then let them marinate for a bit. When you come back to them hours-days-weeks later, it's amazing how easy it is to corral them into order.

Mrs. Gremmels passed away two weeks before I was to take her Creative Writing class. But I'll never forget what she gave me - freedom from fear. That freedom, plus your blog, inspired me to start my own. I'm not as prolific as I'd like... but maybe that's a good thing! >

Oh, yeah. I have a question. Is it really hard to find an agent? I know it's best to have one, but I worry about the cost and all, and how many one has to go through before one finds the "right fit" and the manuscript gets to grow up and be a book.

Thanks :)
~ Linda

p.s. - I got to meet Dale Harriet last Saturday! Wheeee!!!!!!

Laurie - Welcome to the awesome world of 31! Or as my family calls it: Scat. I had to laugh at your comment about "I'll take all your quarters". hee hee. Good times.
For us, it's just what we do when we all get together. It reminds me of my beloved Nana Alice, and of great family get togethers at her place.
Thanks for bringing a smile to my face!!

I have a question not so much about writing (I ought to know about that since I teach it) but more about publishing and promoting. Publishing is scary and overwhelming and it seems to easy to offend someone or totally destroy your chances just because you mess up on little things like etiquette or format and it seems there are millions of things to know before you even try to get published. It makes my stomach hurt. Please tell us how you did it and how it happened for you. It seems I'm not the only one who wants to know this, as I see some earlier commenters asked the same thing.

I know that one way to get a book deal is to have a really popular blog and get discovered all Lana-Turner-in-the-Soda-Fountain style (I think it was her anyway). I was scared to ask you at the book fair because I didn't want to seem like some self-promoting stalker freak, but I'm really interested in how you got people to read your blog in such droves. How do you advertise it and get a lot of readers? What are some ways to drive traffic to your website so that you can build up a ginormous readership and get the publishing industry to take notice? Obviously you have to be a good writer to keep a reader's attention and you have to be engaging, so that's not so much what I'm asking. I've seen amazing writers who no one even knows about who languish in the dusty corners of the blogosphere and then I've seen crap writers (not you) who get 1285 comments on a post about nothing and who get massive book deals. How is it done?

How do you overcome the fear that your writing is just B-A-D, and keep doing it? The fear that no one will "get it," or like it or want to actually read it and keep doing it....obviously this is sort of moot at this point but pull yourself back to a time before you became Crazy Aunt Purl.

Do you have something you do, use if you get stuck... inner-place to start from, verbiage to draw you back to the point? Do you write all over the place (physically I mean)...couch, bed, table, backyard? What is the most distracting thing that can happen to pull you away from your focus (besides the 8-5 stuff). Do you ever write poetry or plays or some other type of writing to get things flowing? Do you doodle when you write or stop writing (guess that applies to when you are doing long-hand)? Are there any authors that have become part of your writing or sort of help you sort yourself out to write (either self-helpy types or any types)? OK - I love your writing

sorry - I just sent that humongo list of questions and didn't fill in my name. Thank you.

Thanks for telling off the spelling-nazis. Someone needs too. Standerdized spelling is all well and good but it should never get in the way of communication of ideas.

Thanks for writing so much too. I always get a kick out of reading it.

Congratulations for coming to this place with regard to answering questions about writing! After all, the questions aren't "How does one write?", but instead, "How do YOU write?" Not because you're an expert, but because we so enjoy the end result and want to understand your journey. Writing a travel memoir doesn't make you a travel agent, simply a traveler.

I'm excited to read your answers to the writing questions. Esp. about self-editing on a blog. I would love to do a blog - my favorite kind of writing is letters (emails) to friends and journaling, but I'm afraid I'd reveal too much on the Internet.

On the other hand - While going thru some memorabilia over the week-end, I found a little thing I'd written (and actually typed up neatly with paragraphs and everything!) about an experience on a trip overseas. I read it and thought, "Wow, this is good," I'd forgotten I'd even done it. So - how do you get more confident in your writing? Sigh. Maybe I need to read your book. (oops, havent gotten it yet!)

My question is a little different. Since you have a full-time job, how do you balance your travel when you go on your book tours with your real job. I wondered that the whole time you were gone. Are your co-workers supportive? These questions may seem irrelevant, but I've always wondered how a person would suddenly deal with having to go on a book tour when they also have a paying job. :-S

Y'all---Ya'll---yal'l---it don't matter how you spell it...I can still hear your voice when I read it!

Actually, I assumed that ya'll was the correct southern way of spelling the word. (I'm Canadian, so it's like 'eh' for me)

Even if it's arguably a contraction of 'you all', I've seen enough true southerners spell it that way that I felt it transcended regular english and had moved into its own dialect. And you can spell your own language any damned way you feel like, eh?

Your lust to write, your description of your three-fingered typing hit home with me tonight. I don't think about what to write, it just comes magically out on paper and I don't edit much. I think I got that from my Daddy. He was the fastest two-finger typist I have ever seen and he had to type letters to me because no one could read his handwriting until he had a stroke at 76 and had to learn to write again. He died a couple of years later and I miss the sound of that typing, miss my Daddy so much. And so I love to read about your family and your love for them. Mr. X did not deserve you or your family.

I have been recommending your book to everyone that I see with a yarn shop or a pair of knitting needles. I have been knitting up a storm since I read your book. You are such a fun writer to read (love those Southern writers) and have a way of putting feelings into words.

Laurie, look at what you have achieved--stitch by stitch, page by page. You, girl, are truly amazing and have learned so much (so far). Just wait for the next chapter--and please keep those chapters coming.

Thanks for the laughter and the tears! Kyle in Amesbury, MA (just about New Hampshire)

i had to go back twice to bigass chain bookstore to get "drunk, divorced and covered in cat hair" -- and then it was the last copy. i "rationed" it -- only a few chapters a night, to make it last longer.

and when i went to meijer (a midwest hyperstore chain) sunday, there it was. it gave me a nice warm feeling to know that even people who don't go into bookstores often will get a chance to find out just how funny you are!

having been the dumpee once and the dumper once, i related to so much of what you wrote. if you can be that funny about so much pain, imagine what you can do with a fictional tale. go for it, girl!

ellen in indy

p.s.: congrats also on one of the best-edited (or best-written-to-begin-with) books i've read recently. ever since spell-checker came along, homonym errors have run rampant in books, but i found none in your book. i'm a copy editor, and such errors make me "cuckoo bananas," as my daughter says.

Proof reading is for cry baby wimps!
I never proof read as evident in the tremendous ammounts of spelling errors and typo's in every little thing I write...the only thing I actaully proof read is my resume and cover letter and I make my DSB do it for me.

You said, "it's almost like there is a direct line between the emotional center of my brain and my fingers, I don't know if that's normal."

It's normal, if you're a writer. I feel the same way about my guitars and music. There is something about having that guitar in my hands, or being next to a cute guy with a guitar in his hands, that activates parts of my brain and anatomy not activated any other way.

On that note, my question has probably already been asked, but... are either of your absolutely adorable brothers single? ;-)

It is only defamation, slander, or libel if it is NOT true, right? You are so forgiving! Since my Mr. X was certainly not fair or moral, he wouldn't ever deserve the same in return. I hope someday to come as far as you have with your self-helpy self. It took me a while just to get to this healthy stage of bitterness from the naive and trusting dumbass I was for so many years... Guess I need to get a punching bag... I don't think writing would make me feel any better.

Hey, you got to hang out with my old pal M.J.! She's fun. Looking forward to the interview.

Keep on writing. Just the way you want to.

Hi, I've got a question....actually I have many but I'll restrict it to one for now. How did you go about the actual "getting published" thing? I mean, did you just send out your work and hope for the best or did you know someone? Did you first see if they'd like the idea or did you write the whole thing and then show them? Did you even write it with a view to getting published?
Hmm....more than one question huh! Sorry...

I have a question! If you were to write Part Two of your book, what would it be about?

Any southerner knows it is "ya'll" We put the emphasis on "ya" not on "'all". "ya" makes a much better looooong syllable than " 'all" ever would. That foolish Yankee.

The best writing advice I ever got (from a professional writer too!) was just write. No editing, trying to figure it out, etc. "Just Write". That little bit of advice has served me well. Makes going back to edit a breeze.

Any Southerner knows it is "ya'll" We put the emphasis on "ya" not on "'all". "ya" makes a much better looooong syllable than " 'all" ever would. That foolish Yankee.

The best writing advice I ever got (from a professional writer too!) was just write. No editing, trying to figure it out, etc. "Just Write". That little bit of advice has served me well. Makes going back to edit a breeze.

Hey Lorrie,
First of all it feels kinda odd to address this comment like I do emails to my friends, but I read this here blog so frequently that I sort of feel like we are friends, is that inappropriate? Anyhow, that wasn't my question, my question is how to you get a work published? I write all the time too, I have half finished books on nearly every computer I have ever sat down in front of but I never finish them because I think to my self, if you finish it, then what? How do you get a publisher to even take a look at what you've written?

How many query letters did you send before you got a nibble, How many times did you feel a tug on the line before you got a bite? How many bites did you get before you landed one? How did you bait your hook?

I have 257 rejections over 4 years and three submission rounds for my non-fiction MS, and 14 for my kids book, (the adventures of a child the size of a pea and his/her guide the amazing, smart, brave house cat...)

I've had one agent who, in my opinion, did not do much of anything. I've researched carefully so my query letters go to publishers who actually publish the type of books I write. I hired a professional editor so the MS is really ready to submit. I've had a couple of close calls ("we were on the fence with this one but..")

So...any words of wisdom? An ace up your sleeve? A insiders view? And while you are answering questions, how 'bout your cute brother's phone number? :)

Laurie,
This is a little off topic, but I wanted to let you know that I loved your book so much. My own Mr.X moved out in July after 22years and 4 kids. "we probably shouldn't have gotten married. I felt forced into it by the way I was raised."
You made me feel less crazy. Particularly since I basically knit night and day to keep from going totally nuts!
Thanks,
Laina

All I can say is that I am so happy for you. I enjoy your blog so much. I don't have any questions, just want to let you know you are so wonderful. You make such honest comment about every day life. I am a visual artist, and have enjoyed reading your blog. It inspires me every time I read it. The book success just couldn't have happened to a nicer person. Kudos!!
Rose

Hey, Laurie - I'm an Okie/Texan and I've always written it "ya'll" and thought that was the right way. I think maybe your commenter was a fake southerner. Cause if they were Southern, they would have learned that "If you can't say something nice . . ." rule. Ya'll know what I'm talking about!

And it got "cold" down here in Houston, and I'm not enjoying it!

You are not ornery, just a strong individual. ("'Just" and "strong" should not be in the same sentence!) And you can spell ya'll however you want - the apostrophe takes the place of missing letters, and it can either be the "ou" of "you" that is missing or the "a" of "all!" So everyone's right! Oh, I'm such a ridiculous little peacekeeper! Thanks for the great writing, as always, Laurie!

First of all, I'm a card shark too, but I don't play Thirty-One. I play Spades and Canasta and Spit. And occasionally Crazy Eights, Go Fish and War with the rugrats. So you *may* take my quarters during 31, but I'd get them back during Spit!

Next up, I have no questions regarding writing, but if ee cummings can present his name in this fashion, you can spell ya'll any way you want!! Love your writing style, and when you do write fiction, make sure to include knitting and cats in the story line.

Last bit, I need to see some feline pics and stories.

Hey Laurie - just wanted to say that playing 31 has always been a tradition in our family too on holidays. But we call it Scat. The only difference is that you yell SCAT when you get 31. And hey - it has the word 'cat' in it right? Congrats on the book and enjoy the tours!

Laurie: I thought that HCI approached you about publishing the book after the Cheaper Than Therapy compilation, and I was wondering how you made the decision to go ahead and commit to doing the book (you may have already discussed this on your blog, but I'm still working thru your archives). I'm leery of commiting to anything I might not be able to accomplish - that whole fear-of-failure-and letting-people-down thing.
If they approached you - How long did it take you to say yes to the book?
Also, how did you deal with someone editing you? Isn't it hard to let go of some of the stuff you wanted to put in the book?
I have a bazillion questions, but I'll stop now!
You absolutely rock.

trisha

Not that MS Word is the be-all and end-all of spell checkers, but it is okay with both ya'll and y'all! So I figure it works either way. :) (Firefox's spellchecker doesn't like ya'll, but then it also doesn't like "spellchecker" or "okay", so there you go.)

I don't have any questions about writing, really, either, but I am so glad that you are writing! I will buy anything you put on the shelf! I do a lot of fiction writing of the fantasy variety, but I don't know that I have the balls to ever try to get it published.

Hehehe...Not a writing question, but a comment....my husband types the same way as you do, and I am always amazed at his speed! He started out just pecking and now he can darn near type as fast as I do after taking typing in school and doing my best to perfect it!

Also, I have to tell you that your blog is my very favoritest blog in the world!

Huge hugs....Anita

I have a question (I don't know if it has been asked yet, so forgive me if it has):

You wrote about your ex in this book and on this site. Since you didn't name him by his real name, were there concerns that he would be upset by this, or that he would try to do something that would stop production of it? Did you have to get any releases or anthing? I'm just curious about how that all works.

Hi Laurie, I don't have any questions about writing. I just want to tell you that even though I don't actually wish Mr X. any ill will (ok, maybe a little), I think he's definitely a dope for letting you go.
Thanks for making me laugh. You are a bright light, indeed!

For the record, I am convinced it's "y'all," but I also think people lose sight of the fact that language is for communication, so if we get what you're saying, who cares if I say y'all and you say ya'll? We both know we're sayin' the same.

I do have a writing question: it seems "Drunk, Divorced..." is sort of... finite. A niche unto itself. I imagine you'd like to publish another book or twelve. Do you change genre? Address entirely different issues? Or does the publisher put forth something they'd like to see from you? Or some other option I'm not thinking of?

Why do you type with only three fingers? are you missing any digits, or is that just your style?

Also.... have you seen Manhattan? Woody Allen... Meryl Streep is his X who wrote a book about him and he's totally nuerotic over it (obviously). I am now picturing Mr. X as Woody Allen...LOL.

I just listened to you on the knit picks podcast! It's great to hear your voice!

Did you know that there is actually a plural form of Y'all? Yep, there certainly is. To those of us from the south it rolls off the tongue regularly as "all y'all". Pay no attention to those stodgy types who would apply style points to good old fashioned slang--they aren't worth the angst.

I love a man who travels with his own spices. That is some serious boy scout-type readiness there: "Be Prepared - For Gumbo".

I have a writerly type question for you Laurie. As a writer who has future fiction aspirations, do you have any characters floating around in the background of your mind? Or features/traits of characters?

It's that "direct line between the emotional part of my brain and my fingers" that eludes me (I'm sure if I had it, I could write awesome stuff (slight exaggeration there). So my question is, do you think a yoga class could help me get that direct connection, or would wine be more helpful :)???

I am going to retract my writey question. Because, I'm not sure if you meant this to be an invitation for open inquiries, or if you just meant kind of a "just in case you happen to think of writing questions...someday" thing. I realize your probably buried under writing questions now! I kinda feel bad!

Hey. Probably a dozen or more people have already told you about this, but every November, there's this thing called NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month). It's a crazygonuts writer thing where you try to write 50,000 words of fiction, preferably on a novel, in 30 days. A lot of areas have "write-ins", which are almost exactly like knitting groups, in that they are filled with crazy people, except nobody talks very much because everyone is writing. Except sometimes we do spend the whole time talking and goofing off. We have "word wars" where we try and write the most words in a 10 minute, or five minute, or whatever minute stretch.

It's insanely fun. We throw all the rules of writing out the window -- quantity over quality, no editing as you go, writing is a social activity, we all whine about how much we suck -- except we're really boasting about it. I think it'd be right up your aisle, if you're looking to do fiction. :)

Someone else may have already asked you this question but what I really want to know is how long it takes you to do these blog posts. Do you write and go back and edit or does it just come out of you that cleanly? My short little posts seem to take forever because I have to go back and correct grammar or sentence structure to make what I'm trying to say clear. (You may not be "wordy," you may just be gifted in a wordy way!)

I always wanted to write a children book.I have it done a little afraid to tried to have it published. How do you go about it. Thanks chickie

Like most of us who read your blog, I love the way you write. Sure there's the y'all vs ya'll (I'm in the y'all camp, my best friend isn't) and the commas and all that - but hey, if it works it works. I'm the master of parenthetical asides myself (and sometimes they get so long that I need to restart the sentence or forever confuse my audience) but somehow I still hope people read my stuffandnonsense on occasion anyway. Besides, what would be the fun of reading if everyone wrote exactly the same way? You writing voice is lovely and southern and reading it makes me happy, or at least makes me happy to be able to read it, though sometimes I might want to give you hugs. Right now they'd be hugs of happiness though - I'm thrilled that you've decided not to duck the writing questions. You write and people read it - and that's no small feat!

Personally, I'm so excited to see that my family is not the only one to play for quarters. And we are RUTHLESS.

And just for the record, I love you for "y'all" and people just need something to get their panties all up in a bunch for. Seems silly to me.

I type with only a couple fingers too and I'm speedy. As long as your typos are under control, who cares if you get fancy and use all 10 fingers or not?

Others have asked it, but I'd love to know a little more about how you were published. What did your editor ask you to change about your writing?

Also would you pretty please post your enchilada recipe? You've set a precedent with your fried okra, fried chicken and patio burgers and the photos were delectable.

i'm still so confused on the y'all vs ya'll debate.

Forget self-help books.... you have a real talent for dialogue. Think stage plays...or possibly screen plays! I'd much rather read you than James Joyce -- despite the fact that you two have a lot in common.

I don't like to call myself a 'writer,' either. Well, because, 'writers' can be so stuffy and pretentious about their work, can't they? And nothing I write is lofty or all that purposeful, other than to say what I want to say, share what I am thinking about and doing. I can write and write and not care whether anyone likes it or not, or even reads it at all. It's very liberating and fulfilling in the blogging community. You can really publish yourself in this forum with great results. Readers and fans, and no middle man (publisher). No money to speak of, but no middle man. (I am more speaking of myself, here, when I talk about the no money part) I am working my day job, writing a newsletter and blogging. I am having the most fun I have ever had in my life. I do not say that lightly. I do not share as much as you do, and you have inspired me to do more of just that, but I do enjoy this work and am finding my niche, in a way, as a writer. Oh! I used that word in reference to myself. What does it mean anyway, except that we write...write-er. That's it. So I guess I am.

Ang

This is totally unrelated to your post (sorry!) but when I saw this this morning I thought of you (and the 3 felines):
http://crave.cnet.com/8301-1_105-9824267-1.html

Hi Laurie

I'm with PurpleKat - how long does it take you to write a blog post? (Actually, I'd like to ask that question to all my favorite bloggers. Mine can take an hour.)

I'm looking forward to your book going on sale in the UK. I have a couple of girlfriends who'd appreciate your writings.

- Pam (normally a lurker)

when did you decide to monetize your excellent writing? what resources do you use?

Ang, a writer is someone who writes. Whether ir nt you are a literary snob or get paid for it.

I know you're probably up to your eyeballs under all these writer-ly questions wishing you never asked us to ask you anything, but I do have one teeny-tiny question: How the h-E-double toothpicks did you deal with the cats while you were writing??? Oh, wait, make that two teeny tiny questions - Did you have to work out a time-share on the computer with Sobakawa and her manifesto? I think my Minerva may be a distant relation to Soba - thank heavens we're far from the Encino-adjacent area, but still, I'm not sure all of Southern California is big enough for the two of them - if the two of them ever read one another's manifestos, heaven help us all...

Then again, maybe your cats are better behaved than my own, at keeping their paws off the keyboard. I'm trying like heck to do this NaNoWriMo thing-a-ma-bob, and I'm afraid a goodly portion of my words may have been typed by the cats running across the keyboard. Locking them out of the room is pretty much out of the question, as I tried that, and I think they just about scratched their way through - darn cheap doors...

Any suggestions? Catnip? (for them) Wine?(for me)

Oh, wait - there was a third tiny question, I just remembered - did you experience any wine-related writing accidents? Like waking up the next morning, and asking, "What the Hale-Bopp did I write last night?"

Thanks for any and all writing advice you can give us. Congratulations again on all your writerly success!

I see I am probably last. That's normal.
My question is: Have you ever re-read something you wrote that you thought went fabulously only to find it totally off the storyline or simply boring as all get out? And do you rewrite it trying to make it more interesting, or just chuck it in the trash and work out a segway?

Hey Laurie,
I actually am a fiction writer and your latest postings are the first thing I jump to when I read my blogroll. Although I'm behind you by one cat and I live one coast away, I feel this weird connection between our lives.

Anyway, I just wanted you to know that if good writing means the ability to evoke true emotion in your readers, you are SO there already. I'm just not able to read your tribute to your beautiful cat Roy without sobbing hysterically, and every time I end up passing that post when I'm showing my friends your insane kitty posse pictures, I'm like, "Oh, no, I can't look at that again, I'll cry!"--but then I always end up reading it again. And then I'll sort of bawl maudlinly, "He came when she called him!" or "He told her his name!" But fortunately, the people who witness this are always cat people, and then THEY read the damn thing and start bawling too. And of course, usually I'll have already told them how HILARIOUS your blog is, and they'll give me dirty looks because I made them cry with a sad kitty thing.

But your blog IS hilarious, when it's not reducing me to tears.

Just thought you ought to know...

WOW - I usually don't get here till comments are closed! Everything's pretty much been said, so just a coupla things.

I agree - how can the "Y'all" person know you've corrected your blog WITHOUT READING THE BLOG??!?!
That muffled "pop" you heard was her tiny little brain exploding!

I don't like grammar police, either - but using an entirely wrong word is something else again. I get so tired of reading that someone's interest was "peaked" - if it's peaked, it's now diminishing, right? OTOH, if it was PIQUED, then it's been "pricked", or stimulated. Lots of other examples - this is just the one I thought of 1st.

People used to be able to educate themselves about such common errors by reading newspapers and magazines. Alas, real live proofreading -
NOT just spellcheck - seems to be a lost art. And any publication that charges you $ to read it SHOULD be impeccably written, with no errors except for intentional ones left in for flavor.

Anyway, thanks for taking all the questions - it's incredibly generous of you!

Hi Laurie - Not sure if this comment thing is going to work because you did say you were only going to keep them open until Wednesday. But as a fellow writer I do have a question for you about telling the stories you tell. For me, whenever I am writing it feels like the stories almost tell themselves. I can't explain how the stories tell themselves, but they do. Sometimes even as I am taking notes about what a person is saying, pieces of it come to me. I don't think about Neil Hopp's first five paragraphs formula or nut-graphs. I just write the story how the story wants to be told. Sometimes I even try to go in with an idea of how I think I want the story to be told and it winds up totally different. It's like it has a mind of its own. I wonder if it is the same way for you.

Writing question: This is basically to any other writers out there too. I've started to force myself to write otherwise I don't get to it. So in the beginning, how much should I force? I'm starting with baby steps and I try to come home and just write my thoughts for that day. However, that's been sporadic too. Any ideas?