First? Gotta get a life! Anyway, you have finally convinced me - I will go get the book (sigh) and try AGAIN....

Awesome! You must feel how I did when *you* commented on my blog ;) (I'm serious!)
I wish I could automate my lunches but I love food and variety of foods too much. Guess I'll just have to work on portion control. Egad.

Gretchen, I don't think it's about a book, I know I could have bought that book six months agao and it wouldn't have clixcked with me. I wasn't ready. I was still working some stuff out, mentally.

But when I was ready and had gotten it together on the inside, that book helped me because I am a nerd and I liked understanding the science behind what's happening inside my body.

I definitely think it starts with your head, though, at least it did for me.

I haven't finished the book, but I luuuurve it. I have always automated my breakfast . . . oatmeal, lite vanilla soy milk, dried cranberries, but I just thought I was a weirdo!!

We must both have the same weirdo magnet implant. (Maybe we were abducted by aliens?) My magnet, though, attracts weirdos of both genders. When I lived in Pittsburgh there was a new incident nearly every day. One favorite story is the time a very large woman sat down on the bus next to me and grabbed my hand telling me she needed my "energy" to pray for the guy on the other side of her so he could resist drugs. I pretended to not be attached to my hand for a few stops then got off way early and was late for work.

Here, the weirdos are barely noticeable.

I'm all about the automation. Since you shared your choices I hope you don't mind me sharing mine. My breakfast has been the same for infinity years. Oatmeal, raisins, carob (healthy fake chocolate), honey, plain lowfat yoghurt and FLAXSEED (super good for you, get the ground up kind). Lunch is two sandwiches (on Ezekiel bread, seems to be the rage now, I used to have rye bread), some kind of cold meats and tomato or lettuce. Sometimes I also put avocado. I have apples and low fat yoghurts for when I'm peckish.

Not only is it easy and efficient, I save so much money.

The tennis shoes under my desk! That's what I've been missing! Or well, I've been using my non-walking shoes as the excuse for never leaving my desk... if I put a pair there, then what in the world will I come up with next?

I agree that it's totally got to be a mental, in your head, decision to get healthy... I'm not sure I'm there yet, but I know I want to be there. That's a step, huh?

My problem is that I'm not TOO overweight... but I could get there any moment and I know the time to make changes is now. But my head's not ready to give up the things that make me so comfortable, like chocolate, cheese, and white bread. Sometimes I think I couldn't survive without them at every meal.

You're right, Laurie, about being ready mentally. Like a smoker coworker said to me, she knew she needed to quit but she wasn't ready, didn't even want to quit yet.

Thanks so much for the input on your meals and wow, does that make alot of sense to me! The good doctor even says that in the book about automating your food? You know, I'm like AmyL above. I too, love variety and find it hard to eat the same things everyday. But I love how you've done it, a couple of options for breakfast and a couple for lunch. I am so willing to try that, I really do get stressed by the choices and not knowing what I want half the time. And then having a variety for suppers, I like that. But I need to start doing more on the weekends so I can have leftovers a few times during the week. I get so stressed having to come home from work and cook for hubby and me. He fries everything and overcooks it to death! I prefer that chore falls on me so we can eat healthier.

And to eat some of my favorite foods every now and then without feeling guilty is the icing on the cake! Pun intended!

Soba is having a blissful time, I see! :)

Hello- I tried, I really tried, but my eyes are killing me scrolling through all 300 gazillion comments. Do you think you can post Dr. Roizen's comment?

You rock!!!

Every single morning, I eat a bowl of Quaker Oatmeal Squares. I almost pitched a fit at the store once when they were out of them because I thought they weren't carrying them anymore (they do this to me all the time, where they stop carrying my favorite things). Anyway, my problem is lunch. I HATE sandwiches. Salads don't fill me up for very long, so I've resorted to eating lowfat microwave meals. They're not bad, but lunch is definitely my least-favorite meal of the day.

(does the Sobatator know she takes up almost a whole double wide scratching thing?? And that Human Girl put it on the innernets for everyone to see???? You, Laurie, should find a safe house......)

I'm going to adopt the Soba workout: Loll in one direction. Loll in the other. Repeat.

I'm going to add my 1/2 cent of advice to all you've already received: add a spoonful of flaxseed to your automatic breakfast. (Start small because it upsets some peoples' stomachs.) I haven't lost any weight adding 1/4 cup of flaxseed to my auto-breakfast but my cholesterol dropped 20 points.

I admire you no matter what you weigh.

Good Lord, woman, no fair touching chords like that! Geez, making me think at 5.50am.... *hug*

I didn't direct traffic in my nightie, but my mom did. But I think it was because she's bipolar, 'cause she always put herself first....eh, that's a whole other story. ANYWAY!! Being a southern woman myself, it is true about being last. Its part of our genetic make up. We save the breasts and the legs for hubby and the kids, and we take the thigh and the gizzard for ourself. I put everyone first to the point I literally had nothing left of myself to give, and came as close to a complete breakdown as anyone ever did. Its a difficult journey, but we CAN reprogram ourselves. It was a difficult thing to make myself believe that thinking of myself now and then did not constitute being a bad mother/wife/friend/whatever. On the other hand, "Steel Magnolias" is not just a movie title. It's a personality trait. But somewhere the lines get blurred I guess. Keep writing, and I'll keep coming back.
Melissa
In Mississippi

Monica, he said:
"Enjoyed reading your blog and comments--YES it is about your health and that 30 minute walk a day is a key start, as is dumping the fridge and automating your choices for health. Hope you succeed with eating and walking for YOU, this time."

I about fell over.

Suzie, they don't call her the Sobinator for nothing. She DOMINATES that double-wide!!!

Have you forgotten your own T-shirt "I knit therefore I am . . ." and the part about the sharp pointy sticks? I bet a good "accidental" jab in the thigh would stop Mr. Fondle Guy when his limbs "accidentally" land on top of you.

I too automate breakfast but we always eat lunch out here. So I've been automating my dinner by eating a salad and some kind of meat from the whole foods hot bar. I'm with Soba, a good workout always makes me want to nap - though usually I'm up off the mat and home first!

I have a weirdo-magnet too...mine attracts drunken bicyclists. You wouldn't think there were that many drunken bicyclists out there, but if there's one on the road, he will be weaving down the road right in front of my van. (It's always a guy.) I just turn down the first side-road I come to, whether I know where it leads or not, and find some other way to get where I'm going. I'm not messing with a guy who's not completely in charge of his faculties no matter what kind of vehicle he's piloting!

And how cute is Soba! :)

Love you, darlin!

Laurie, I am on the same reprioritize-your-eating-and-stuff path that you are on. Among other changes, I cut salt out of my diet and it's been hard, way hard, like being without ankles hard. But the good part about cutting salt out of my diet is that now I can actually see my ankles because I'm not as puffy now. So now I can buy strappy ankle-highlighting shoes in the spring. And buying shoes is a good reward for anything. I am almost positive you'd agree.

Hooray!
Cooking for oneself can be fun and interesting and relaxing.
Trick is not to get overwhelmed and just enjoy the process.
(I always cook double portions, enough for lunch the next day!)
Who said cooking for one was hard? Just cook for two and wrap the rest.

Cheers to a good kind of selfishness!

Dinner is where I break down. Consuming a "normal" portion of food (and wine!) for dinner is incredibly difficult. So, yes it is a victory when you can do that. Go you!

And be wordy, we love it.

In the automated lunch category, one easy thing to have is fresh veggies like red bell peppers and carrots and broccoli with a Indian raita yogurt dip or a low fat boursin-type cheese. There are a bunch of raita recipes on the web. And I love apples and peanut butter too! Carrots and peanut aren't bad either. Believe it or not, it kind of tastes like carrot cake....

Amy, yes, knowing you want to get there IS a step! I was there before I got to the step of actually doing anything about it. I do think that if your mind isn't really ready, what your body does isn't going to work right, at least in the long run. It still isn't easy, heaven knows! But when you're ready, you CAN do it.

Oh, and Laurie (hi, yes, it is your blog), you can do it too, and just look at who-all you inspire! When you get the 3 AM crazies (don't we all?), you'll have a ready resource of I-am-not-alone. Way to go!

Laurie, You really do have to be ready mentally. Pretty much for any life changes. You sound like you got your feet on the ground and you've found something that works for you. Your comments about wearing a fat suit to keep away people/men really resonated with me. I did that in my late teens and early twenties. I really hadn't developed the skills to deal with men, I was quite shy and didn't date at all in high school or early in college. Now, in my fifties, I have the skills. Unfortunately, I'm finding that women in their fifties are pretty invisible.

My turn to share. I have been doing the "no diet" since May although I didn't know that it was called something until now.

It has changed my life. No end in sight. I eat oatmeal and yogurt in the a.m. and hb eggs or cheese or turkey chili in the afternoon.

Favorite part: Not waking up in the morning mad at myself for what I had done to myself the day before.

xo

I think what you said makes sense. I am on a low glycemic diet which cuts out bread,potatoes and sugar.Why>? I am borderline diabetic and dont want to go full blown. Currently its called syndrome X or insulin resistant. I do pick my meals in advance or I will eat horribly sweet stuff. I am like a bad carb addict.
I wish you much luck with your eating. It is the small victories that lead to winning the war.

Also, I'd like to throw in here that I try to eat in a modified low-carb way and the reason for that is because as I've gotten older my body can't seem to handle as many carbs as I used to be able to eat. I still eat pasta, rice, bread, etc., but only a very, very small portion or else it messes with my stomach. And cereal! My beloved cereal I can't eat much of that either for the same reason. I think I can do sandwiches if I have enough lunch meat, lettuce and tomato in there and a fruit to go with it. Salads just don't fill me, even with the chicken and cheese. I can do yogurt for breakfast with a small amount of hard cheese to eat with it along with coffee and (real) cream, no sugar. I'll have to experiment with lunch.

My daughter loves Dr. Oz and Dr. Roizen, she will flip when I tell her who commented on your blog!

Laurie, I started reading your blog for the knittin' but I really admire the way you put your personal issues out there and do it in such a sane, funny and insightful way.

Okay, that said, have you checked out some of those Epicurious.com recipes? You can sort them by ingredients. I hate to cook, but find their site helpful. You'll have a freezer full of labelled tupperwares soon!

Take care.

I just happened on your blog today and I have always known how to eat healthy, but have been over eating for years after dinner and I saw the yearly article in People Magazine about people loosing 100's of pounds and I said I can do that. I finally was sick of punishing myself with food. I saw the Oprah show too. I stopped eating tones of sugar and I am eating the same 2 things for breakfast and lunch too and it is such a relief. I make a soup or stew every week with turkey or chicken and 3 or 4 vegetables and have it 3 times. I really know it's about how we treat ourselves. Good for you!

Hi Laurie – I have composed and deleted about four comments now. They all came off like a rant against men and public transit. Please know that you are not alone with this problem either. I have a friend who has the same problem on transit and we really struggle to find a solution besides “buy a car”. Just remember that it’s not your fault, you have done nothing to deserve this attention.
*virtual hug* (oh, you feel thinner already!)

soba doesn't look so fierce when she's "on the nip".

i love the discussion here. obviously it's a weighty subject (hah!). i think the un-diet might be the kindest way to approach decades of letting myself goooooooooo...

I am with Melissa in Mississippe (commentor #14) when she talked about how we can reprogram ourselves. I have been working more on treating myself like everyone else in my life and it has been hugely challenging. I have an exercise routine and I am MUCH better about the foods I eat. I still lay awake at night though thinking about things I should have done and beating myself up over that. I am confident that if I just keep at this I will get better. Or buy a very sexah nightgown before directing traffic. With furry slippers.

You wanna know why men accost you over what you call all that gorgeousness around you? Because you're gorgeous AND you have a nice body so they don't feel like they're hugging up on a broomstick!!!

SMOOCHES!

My husband, the cleanest-cut guy on the planet and one of about six in our entire college class who never once indulged in people catnip, is a drug-peddler magnet. Honestly, we used to walk across Boston Common pretty regularly and the dealers would ignore the rest of us and go straight for him. That's better than your experiences on the subway, though. Ewwww.

Maybe you could get George Clooney to comment on your blog? Hi, George? I am 23, 5 foot 10, 120 pounds, blonde, and single, with a Stanford PhD in particle physics. I am also a pathological liar, but don't let that bother you.

Hi Laurie,
I have been reading your blog for about a week now (found ya through Miss Kendra @ Golden State). I love your kitty pictures with comments and your gorgeous knitting.

Thanks for writing what you do out in internet land. Funny how other's writing can put your own thoughts in perspective.

You mean you haven't learned "the look" from your momma or granma? The one that says "back off, or I will staple your parts to your toes"? I thought it was mandatory training...

Earthquake sneakers? I never would have thought of that!

Very cool about the comment from Dr. Roizen!

I am going to refer to you as Ol' Wine Lips McGee from now on, I think. =)

I wonder if Dr. Roizen read my snarky comment about the snickers bars...oops. I promise I don't do that anymore.
I happen to think that there is something magical about 35 - I started a little earlier (33) but it's like a clarity comes about where you see things differently and realize that you can handle them, maybe because you're an adult now. At least thats how it was for me.
I'm still working on the food stuff (did you see Bob's best life stuff?) and am now preparing to tackle the money stuff with more dedication and fewer trips to Target...

At first when I read Monday’s blog, I thought that it had nothing to do with me. Today I came back and when you made the referral to Dr. Roz’ comment, I went back and re-read both the original post as well as reader comments. I started thinking that perhaps the book would apply to me as well. I am a runner – a runner because when I run, I am able to control myself. When I run, it matters to me what I eat: oatmeal every morning, salad every lunch, and then dinner. I run because for that hour or so, I can choose whether I am running ‘away’ from or ‘toward’ something. I keep running because I’ve found that after about 38 (I’m almost 45 now), white women mysteriously become invisible – therefore I run because for that hour, I’m not invisible: I’m part of another group where being middle-aged is less important than your most recent time or the race for which you are training. If I don’t run, I satisfy myself with food – being poor, as well as pre-disposed to diabetes, high blood pressure, and heart disease, I find it cheaper to run!
You had mentioned about being a magnet for crazies and someone else had mentioned the fat as a buffer. And what happens when you no longer have the fat to hide you? Well, if you are like me – it doesn’t matter because no one can see you anyway. This has all been rather nice because since I’m invisible, I don’t need the fat or the baggy clothes or the downcast eyes to keep people away. At almost 45, I am doing things for me. I guess I feel as if I have the best of both worlds – I can be seen when I want, but then I can become invisible again.

Also, I'm not quite as crazy as that post makes me seem!

I eat natural peanut butter sandwiches everyday for lunch, too! Sometimes with an apple, sometimes with some yogurt, sometimes with some soup. And always with milk. And it's cereal or oatmeal in the mornings as well. I haven't lost any weight doing this (not really trying to), but I also haven't gained any. And I live in the most amazing food city in the world, Montreal. If I didn't do this, it wouldn't be McD's, it's be chocolate croissants. Or I'd spend every waking moment thinking about what I'm going to eat next.
And yeah, I'm not shy with the wine at dinner, either.
Good luck!

From a fellow peanut-butter-eater, once again, thanks for living out loud.

Oh, here's an easy dinner entree for ya, if you're interested: take a boneless, skinless chicken breast, cover with a couple tablespoons of light (lower sodium) teriyaki sauce, add other preferred seasonings (pepper, garlic powder, onion powder, cumin, etc.) to taste, and cook in microwave on High, about 2-3 minutes on each side. Quick, easier than pie, very moist and quite yummy.

Here is my automated food (not that anyone asked):

weekday breakfast:
Fage 0 fat plain Greek yogurt from Trader Joe's with non-fat no-sugar Ezekiel musli and stevia

winter weekend breakfast:
steelcut oats with cinnamon and stevia

summer weekend breakfast:
yogurt, frozen fruit chunks and green tea smoothie with stevia

I don't automate lunch, there is a deli close by that has healthy soups and salads. But, I love your peanut butter sandwich and apple idea. I will try that.

dinner:
already cut and washed veggies and already cooked Foster Farms chicken strips from costco with pesto (I will eat almost anything if it has pesto on it) with Trader Joe's low fat cheese melted on top. Really easy, microwaves in minutes. Might have to microwave veggies alone a bit first, depending on how cooked you like them.

snacks:
homemade trail mix with roasted nuts, roasted edamame, dried fruit with no added sugar
or whole fruit

I love feeling healthy, it does make a difference.

Funny, but I just began a "no diet" healthy eating/healthy activity lifestyle adaptation. My partner of five years finally said to me that he worries about my health and has agreed to go to the gym with me and "train" me. At first I was worried about this arrangement, but so far its working great. I enjoy our time together doing something healthy for ourselves and his help. He enjoys helping me and doing something for us both. So far I'm just trying to be more mindful of eating food that is as whole as possible and skipping fast food and high fat stuff. I wish you the best of luck.

Beth, you don't sound crazy to me, I have experienced the invisible thing.

Absolutely a great post.. I can relate in so many ways... I am on that same journey... with a great deal of weight to lose roughly 80 pounds.. your blog provides me with much needed inspiration.. Wishing you the best of luck.. your automated lunches and breakfasts sound great to me.. and I love also the comment from another person regarding being asleep and being fat.. I can so appreciate that... nothing is ever guarenteed no matter how we better ourselves...
Good Luck

For my automatic lunch, I always cook a big meal on Sunday, eat it for dinner then pack up the leftovers in individual gladware containers. In the morning, I can just grab and go, like Lean Cuisine, but a whole lot more delicious. It is also nice to have a hot meal mid-day. For some reason it makes me feel more satisfied.

Laurie,
Thanks again for being so open and sharing your life with us(by that I mean *us* your fans, not *us* as if I have multiple personalities)
I almost always find something in your entries that correlates with my life...armor of fat, check! Life with cats and yarn, check! Beacon that attracts the crazy mens, check! (Yeah, one licked me on the neck a couple of weeks ago. Yep, licked me.)

Breakfast: Coffee
Lunch: Hamburger, Fries & Diet Soda
Dinner: Wine
Midnight Snack: Contents of refridgerator/pantry

Is that wrong?

Couldn't help notice that the cat's catnip mat is a Double Wide. Wacka wacka.

I'm right with you on the whole non-dieting, eating good stuff, putting food in its rightly place in my life, thing.

I am a big fan of automating meals. Maybe, just maybe I'll try walking at lunch. Thanks for sharing yourself...it helps a lot of us!

Um, psychomom...ya think? I like the coffee and wine part. ;)

You and I are in two different levels of crazy, ya know? You are reacting the same way to Dr. Roizen commenting on your blog as I have reacted to YOU commenting on mine. My thought process? "Wow, Dr. Roizen commented on Laurie's blog...but did Laurie comment on his? I think not!" ;)
Glad to hear you are doing so well with this. I'm getting there slowly...

I just saw an ad for an appearance by Kitty Carlisle Hart in San Francisco, and I thought of you Laurie. She's 97 and she's doing a cabaret show! Do you think she does the non-diet?

Kim, you are so cute.

psychomom... you just described my whole divorce diet!!! LOL

Love the Soba pictures, but she may want to consider reading this wonderous diet book. Looking a tad blob-ish as she rolls in her field of happyness.

But, if she's happy with herself, leave her alone. You don't want to provoke a dictator.

Laurie, you have a wonderful way with words. I can appreciate the feel of victory over a normal portion eaten -- it does feel great.

Yay for you!!!

You've done it again. Made me want to jump in my car and drive as fast as I can and find you so I can hug you. I'm sure it seems really strange to reveal yourself to so many people. We know a lot about you, but if we passed each other on the street, you'd have no idea who most of us are.

Well, we'd probably give ourselves away with all the giddy-ness and pointing and jumping up and down like we were seeing some hollywood star. Cuz you are a star. Shiney and bright, bringing light to a lot of people who would otherwise be sitting in the dark.

You're one of my favorite people in the world, and even if I never get to meet you, you should know that I send happy vibes your way every single day without fail.

Oh, and if the good doctor is watching, you sold another copy of his book to a gradually inflating 40 year old mom who was starting to feel like a beach ball. Which is not so much the good shape when you're on the slippery side of the hill, if you know what I mean.

make that two copies! I just picked up my copy of You on A Diet as well!

Here's my exercise program to go with psychomom's diet:

-- Pushing my luck
-- Jumping to conclusions
-- Running around in circles
-- Raising objections
-- Lowering expectations
-- Carrying grudges
-- Stretching the truth
-- Hurling insults
-- Throwing my weight around

I just want to repeat what a lot of others are saying. I think it takes a lot of courage to say so much to the whole world... and thank you for doing it. It's not surprising that you don't realize how "normal" you are - after reading all of these comments it seems there are many people who feel the same but thought they were strange as well. Thanks for putting it out there for us!!

Yeah for Crazy Aunt Purl!

Getting healthy is a huge task. I've been working on getting healthy for 2.5 yrs now and have lost 40 odd pounds. That's a small child! I have 30 more to go. How I did it was changing the way I eat. For example, if I go out to dinner I will not eat the bread/buns so I can have dessert or if I do go for Mcfatties I will eat the burger only - no fries. Everything in moderation.

I'm not sure if the health gurus would agree with this method but I have decreased my dress size from 26 to 16. Something's working.

Oh yeah take bellydancing you will start to love your booty. I don't have booty I have a belly but you look at your body differently. It's a good thing.

Loved this: "the good kind of selfish where you treat yourself the same way you'd treat a cherished boyfriend or spouse or child."

It's so cool that Dr. Roizen commented on your blog, and that you read your way through almost 350 comments. I wonder if you've managed to boost sales of "YOU on a Diet"?

Cats fall hard from catnip highs. My cat crashes like it's the end of the world.

Good for you and good luck with your change in eating habits (I hate the word d-i-e-t). Losing weight is a side benefit of what you are doing. The main benefit is your overall health. This will not just effect your weight, but your blood pressure, cholesterol levels and such. You are doing a very good thing for yourself. :)

After reading your blog yesterday, I went for my own lunchtime walk. I walked down to the AM/PM to get a big bottle of water. And then I walked a while longer before coming back. You're right, it does feel good. And it is hard to think of a little thing like a 25 minute walk making much of a difference. But I could have sat here and done nothing instead. I'm glad I didn't.

Thanks for the inspiration.
I'm going again tomorrow.

i am also Southern and have had issues with men on public transit--you HAVE to get meaner, which is a little sad. but then--you are talking to a girl who once punched a man in the face on a rush hour NYC subway for grabbing her crotch, too. sometimes mean is important.

still yay-ing you for your good attitude--every healthy decision you make IS a triumph, so you go girl. :)

I'm a fairly new reader of yours and I want to let you know how much I admire you and where you seem to have come out in handling your life problems. I applaud you and am rooting for your well-being. You seem like a terrific person and I wanted you to know you've got another online friend on your side. Sta well.

Deven

I'm a fairly new reader of yours and I want to let you know how much I admire you and where you seem to have come out in handling your life problems. I applaud you and am rooting for your well-being. You seem like a terrific person and I wanted you to know you've got another online friend on your side. Stay well.

Deven

Oh, Laurie - You have hit a nerve - The whole dieting thing is such a HUGE (forgive the pun) topic. I don't know anyone that hasn't struggled. I think you a bazillion times right about being 'ready' to make the change. The psychology of it all is soooooo difficult. If it was easy, we'd all be supermodel toothpicks!!! People focus on food first and then they consider a bit of exercise, but we never account for the part our minds play in our success to lose weight. One of the reasons that I like the You on a Diet book is that it is so accessible. If it's not simple to follow, I will lose it around day two because my life is complicated enough!!! I think the key is keeping a positive outlook, and realize that this whole effort is a process. Making a lifestyle change is hard, but I think this is a formula that I can apply to my life long-term. I will never never be 'perfect' but I will never give up, and I will alway forgive myself and start again.

Life is good when you can just roll around in something that makes you happy and then fall asleep. I will admit to having woken up with bits of yarn in my hair (knitting in bed before I went to sleep).

Automating should be easy for me too. While I love eating food I hate thinking about it so I'll do something wierd like buy a meatloaf at Boston Market and then it is the only thing I eat for two days. That can't be good nutritionally...

I'll have to set it up better so when I am on auto pilot I'm meeting my nutritional needs. I'd never feed anyone else that way, why I think it is OK for me I don't know.

I enjoy reading your blog! Usually I just lurk, but I made it to the bottom of the huge comment list, so I had to put my 2 cents worth in!! Getting healthy is great! I have lost 30 lbs and decreased all my "numbers"! I also joined a gym and am pretty faithful at going 2-3 times a week. I work hard when I'm there and at 58 I feel great! Hang in there and keep up the good work!!

Can I just throw in a word of caution about peanut butter? As much as I love it, that stuff is so calorie-dense, you may want to develop 2 automated lunches & alternate, so you're not eating it everyday. It was actually invented to get the maximum number of calories into sick people. Congrats on your efforts towards good health. Kelly

Kelly, is that really how PB was invented?? CRAZY!!

I love that you are concentrating on healthy eating and not dieting!! That's what made my weight loss journey a success so far - focsing on health and not dieting. (I've lost a little over 100 pounds so far, so it must be working!) My 'lightbulb' moment came when I read the introduction to the book 'Thin for Life', where the author says that she was sick of yo-yo dieting and decided not to diet anymore, but if she was going to be fat, at least she'd be fat and eating healthy, and by doing that she managed to lose a ton of weight!

Dearling, you are the cats' pajamas. And it's refreshing to see that there's a cat as shameless as Lilliane. And here's a plus to being One of Advanced Age: I'm so *proud* of you! Remember the airline hostess (I've said it before, I'll say it again): "Affix your OWN oxygen mask first, THEN you'll be able to help those around you." We all (not just southern belles) are taught to nurture. It's not wrong or selfish or bad to look out for yourself first. The better you care for yourself and the more you like yourself, the better you are for everyone else (case in point: you're FAB for all of us, Dearling, keep up the good work!) And snorgles to your kitties from icy Wisconsin.

My X was giving me a back rub while I was lying face down, and, yes, naked! and said "you really need to lose some weight." It's amazing how just one comment can leave you feeling so bad about yourself and 5 years later it still hurts when I think about it. It was, however, the last time he saw me naked, because I left soon after that! I have enjoyed reading about the weight issues and it's good to be reminded that it's not about pleasing someone else, just yourself.

PS My cats LOVE that cat scratcher thingy. They slobber all over it! I wish they made one for humans.

My cats love the cat scratcher from TJs, particularly the organic catnip. Does even the Empress of the Universe Sobakowa calm down when she is high on catnip?

I had to get four -- yes, four -- scratchers so each cat could have their own at catnip time because if not, Soba will beat up everyone (even Roy!) to hoard all the drugs.

She takes her catnip very, very seriously.

I thought Fettucine Alfredo was invented to get as many calories as possible into sick people.

What is it with public transportation and creepy men? I feel like I should to carry a scalding hot cattle brand with me that says "PERV" If they get in branding reach BAM! they're marked for all to know that they're bus perverts.

I hate eating the same thing everyday. I automate my lunch by having a small portion of left over dinner from the night before. Cooking Light online has a wonderful database of recipes (food I like, but made healthier) and I try to use those for the basis of my dinner cooking.

laurie, I didn't comment the day you posted your epic because 300 of your other friends stopped by to say hi... Taking control of what we eat is the biggest step towards living a quality life when we are 60,70,80 and beyond. I started cooking (joyfully, I might add) about 7 years ago (early 40s) when I realized I had the potential to step into my mother's shoes (fatal heart attack at 53)and that really scared me. It should have scared me at 23 (how old I was when she died) but it didn't. As I got older, it became clearer, I had to take control. I never realized how good of a cook I could be (I would have started years ago!!)
Good for you for taking a very big step. You will be delighted at the changes you are going to experience. Don't give up the wine though, that is still really healthy for you!!
take care.

Peanut butter with no jelly! Horray! I wish more people understood the simple joy of a plain peanut butter sandwich.

i get so excited when your website opens on my computer screen... it's just like when there's a surprise new episode of your favorite tv show.

p.s. i didn't think anyone sane rode the subway in LA. at least that's the word on the streets in NYC.

Sheesh, you make it sound like there's something wrong with directing traffic in your nightgown. Trust me, it can be fun.

Uh.

I meant to say, I hear you on not putting yourself first. For three and a half years, I was in a relationship with a man who commanded the first place in my life, to the point where I lost myself and my goals and my previously hot body just so that I could cater to his every whim. That said, I don't think you have to be Southern in order to put yourself last. All you need is a low opinion of yourself and the cultural environment to reinforce it.

And now I wish that I could eat a normal portion, too. Right now, chocolate binges are all I want. Oy!

De-lurking (again?)

I just have to say that I'm so glad you posted what you did both here and in your previous post.

I was on WW leading up to my wedding, but most of the time it simply stressed me out. I don't have the space in my head at this point to count points, or whatever.

But I can say that my eating habits have changed and I'm eating healthier! While I gained a few pounds back after the wedding (8/26/06), especially over the holidays, I still feel healthier and I'm happy with myself and how I'm making healthier choices. I never wanted to do the yo-yo diet thing (especially after one disastrous attempt at a drastic diet).

Thank you for sharing so openly! You've encouraged me that it's ok to not be "on plan", but to simply make those day-to-day healthy choices and take it one step at a time.

Everyday that I read your blog I keep thinking that you are me or I am you - I am also a)35 b)Cancer and c)in exactly the same state of mind! This freaks me out almost daily! Keep up the good work! And stop reading my mind - I have little enough to share!

I'm naturally 'normal' - that is, I've never been really overweight nor am I a skinny minny. But several years ago, I was feeling a little unsightly - say by 20 lbs - and decided it was time to diet. I sort of converted the highly effective, if disgusting, cabbage soup diet and ate nearly the same thing every day: Peanut Butter Clif Bar for breakfast, an awesome salad for lunch (3 oz chicken, spiced pecans, feta AND dressing), a bowl of the cabbage soup for dinner and, when I got hungry close to bedtime, I'd drink a big glass of milk or eat a hardboiled egg. I thrived on the repitition! I never had to worry about what I was going to make, my bank account was happy and I lost a bunch of weight. I even kept it off after the 'diet' by sticking with the same bfast/lunch but eating better dinners - fish, chicken, etc.

Hubbo and I are now determined to eat better - much like your non-diet. And guess what we eat for lunch. PB&J! Yes, we add the J. Can't do it with the J. Even still, I've lost a few pounds - enough to fit easily into my fat jeans, which were coming perilously close to turning into my skinny jeans!!

BTW, if you have your knitting with you on the bus, a well-timed 'slip' of the needle could help with the skanky molesters.

Hi- I really like your style!
Your entry really made me think, so after doing the chores on our farm, I went for a 30 minute walk- and tonight I skipped the 9 o'clock news and went for another 30 minute walk-in that beautiful cold snowy weather we are having these days.I walked along the main road, and had one car driving by. ONE! we live in the middle of nowhere.... Anyway, thanks for posting, you make a difference to people! And I really like the looks of your cats!

Hmmm -- you can still eat fried okra right? That *is* a vegetable after all... a VERY important one. Maybe just less frequently??? I could see not eating fried Okra as a huge problem...

I hope you enjoy your healthier body. In my personal experience (ymmv) the more activity you engage in (walks, stairs, etc) the more healthy foods your body will crave. I've given up on numbers (clothing sizes) and concentrating on warding off the family medical history instead. It's kept me on the straight and narrow!

for what it's worth, way down here at the bottom of the pile; In a novel (I think it was a novel, or a story, it was a long time ago. It might have been a true thing too. It was good, and I wish I had a clue what it was so I could read it again) I read, the protagonist was interviewing or studying or something some guy who was a famous author, and he always had a tuna salad sandwich for lunch. That way, he never had to think about it.

I've been overweight since puberty because I have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome which causes me to have a low metabolism. So my weight has never teeter-tottered, i've always been consistantly overweight. I'd been this way long enough that I never thought I could lose weight, but I made the decision that I needed to gain control and make a commitment to make changes. I joined weight watchers and that has helped immensely. The last couple of months though my hormones have been going crazy because of a prescription change and I have been eating worse than ever. OK, maybe not EVER,but close enough. Yesterday I made the decision that I'm "starting over" and going back to the basics of drinking lots of water increasing vegetables and fiber. I'm glad you are talking about this now. It makes me feel a little less alone in my struggles.

As usual, Laurie, you are an inspiration.

But on reading some of the comments, I still think many of us are missing the point... and associating being overweight with unhealthy and skinny as healthy, when that isn't necessarily true. I agree with Shetha that family history and genetics have a lot to do with how we look, so a thin person still needs to eat right and someone heavier might not be necessarily more unhealthier than someone thinner.

I almost wish we could strike the word DIET out of lexicon. The focus should be on eating healthy and living right, and not just those who may want to lose a few pounds. I know a lot of unhealthy skinny people. I'm fairly thin and I have to take cholesterol medicince.

I think the problem for most Americans is not just the food, but our lack of exercise. TV has ruined us!

Now is it possible for you to write about Kate Winslet next week because I would love to have her comment here so I can meet her.

Hooo boy, I am all for planning out my meals. I've become fairly anal about it. Like you, I have the same thing for breakfast and lunch for the week. Nothing too fancy, but I put it togethre the night before so that I'm not scrambling around in the morning and freaking out about what I'll eat. And I always pack my snacks. It's a bad day without my snacks. Then finally, I cook on the weekends and have stuff for the rest of the week.

Once again, you're correct. It's not about being on a 'diet' and restricting yourself from everything. It's about being aware of what you eat.

Or at least I keep repeating the above to myself when going past a McDonalds. Oh lord, giving up those fries is hard.

oof. so i did read your version of war and peace but didn't comment because well, you were spot on and 300 people told you so. even dr. roizen thought so.

by the way, when you comment i kind of feel like a rockstar.

anyway - keep us in the loop.

as for the skanky molesters -- i so know what you mean. imagine being a teenager who looks older than she is growing up in paris. ugh. and it's never the cute ones either.

Hi! I never comment, but I read.

Re: automating lunch. YES. Anyhow, if you ever want a 'hot' automatic lunch, may I reccomend the Kashi meal? I buy loads and store them in my freezer. They're between 230-330 calories for a whole meal...but they're not diet food. Which is really the reason I initially started buying them - I think the diet food with the weird chemicals in it is probably as bad for you as the crap stuff.

Anyhow, it's all crazy grilled chicken and whole grains and veggies, and they taste really good! You can see the grill marks on the food! I've gotten my health-obsessed boyfriend hooked on them. And hot food is hard to do fast, at work, with no real 'kitchen', so these things are lovely.

My favorite is the Southwest Chicken.

I, too, held off on commenting on your wonderful non-diet entry...assuming that there was NO way you would get to all those comments! But I just have to say thank you...your post was so powerful, and encouraging, and really made an impact on me (and about 1000 others! (hey, if 300 comment, think how many are reading!?)). Thanks for being so open and for sharing it with all of us. Somehow I never thought it was OK to automate lunch, so this is a big help. Turkey and swiss on wheat...coming up for the next umpteen days! Take care and thanks again. Please keep us "posted" (snort) on your progress towards health and happiness. We are ALL pulling for you!!!

If someone has already mentioned this, forgive me, and proceed to ignore me. Every morning I eat a 100% whole wheat english muffin with some pb called Better'N Peanut Butter. I've found it at Trader Joe's but it's probably other places too. 2 Tablespoons is only 100 calories and 2.5 grams of fat and it is peanut butter ambrosia.

Holy frozen nibblets! I almost didn't bother to post, the whole "What's one more voice added to the chorus?" thing, except, of course, at the end of this internet tube thingy, there is a very real person named Laurie who has a knack for nailing my feelings in words. So, uhm...yeah. The whole "fat keeps unwanted attention" thing is my life, in 4 words. BUT, the whole, "eating for nutrition instead of confort" thing is edging its way into my life as well. Keep it up - the writing and the new attitude towards food.

I had a friend like that in school -- it was uncanny how all the weirdos would gravitate to her. She was extremely nice and not a weirdo at all, but boy did the scary guys just rotate around her.

Funny how I can relate even though I'm on the opposite end of the spectrum. I don't eat...so that I can be invisible. Like the smaller I am the less noticeable I'll be. And yet...I think about food all the time. How many calories? How much will I have to work out now? What did people think of me when they saw that I ate that? I think it's behavorial no matter which end of the spectrum you're on if your eating habits have to do with low self esteem. And the hunger pangs help me think less about the real pain. But underweight people aren't allowed to have body image issues it seems. I probably shouldn't even post, but for some reason your blog has helped me face so many issues and feel less alone. So thank you.

I have finally taken control of my life/eating also. No matter how crappy life is going...at least I can control what I put in my mouth instead of the cheeseburger soup controlling me:)

Hey Laurie...I read you everyday and we are leading parallel lives except I'm brunette and not so much with the many cats (my 16 year old kitty passed away and I am currently catless).

I don't post much because another way we differ is in the hypergraphia manner (I'm a little hypo there). Anyway, just had to post because I'm in your neighbourhood! Yeah Van Nuys/Sherman Oaks for 24 hours - so HOLLA! Couldn't help but think of you and look for you on the passing buses-only a little stalkerish right? Right? Oh and um...the traffic! You no lie.

Love your writing and you should know that your sharing touches me. Resonantes...like you said feels good to know others are having similiar journeys.

Also...George Cloonies...teehee...imagine multiple Cloonies!

You: On A Diet arrived today! I still jazzed up from watching the episode of You: On A Diet Saturday afternoon. It's great that Dr. Roizen left a comment on your blog entry! I wonder how he found out about it? i.e., was he searching Google for people writing about the book?

At a party the other night, I was reading the host's cookbooks (what?) and found one with a title like "Cooking for One," or something. It quoted an old French woman who always eats dinner alone, and her theory on eating by one's self. She always sets the table with nice dishes and silverware, cloth napkins and candles. She makes full, complete meals that require time. I thought this was kind of novel, considering that most of my meals alone involve...the computer and something I put in the microwave.

Hey Laurie, you asked about the yarn I used for the scarf I made my cousin for Christmas, it was Lion Wool-Ease in the colorway Wood. I *loved* how the colors worked up with that yarn!

"I don't know exactly how I will deal with unwanted male interaction if I get thinner."

Not to put too fine a point on it, but this will start to resolve itself as you age. [Been there; it's a welcome relief.]

Hmm have you ever thought you could not have been selfish, but just not have had the energy to do it? I had a mild depression for years which became worse when my mom suddenly passed away. I also had several food allergies to work around. My doc kept telling me that I had to loose weight and I kept telling him I just did not have the 'energy' to spend on dieting, on watching what I was eating and what not. Now that I'm doing a bit better, I've automatically started to eat healthier. I can now think about what is healthy and what not, I have the energy to spend time on things like 'eat fruit instead of chocolate/cake/whatever'.

Now I have to go read all those comments to see what the Dr said :)

cheers Eva

Laurie - You are NOT invisible....look at all the lives you touch :-) You're an amazing, talented, beautiful women - Thank you for sharing your wonderfulness with all of us who make a point to check in with you every day!! Peace!

haha! I have that problem with the freaky men in L.A. as well. And I'm a really flighty person, really, REALLY not comfortable with being touched, so it's sort of rough. Maybe you could pass on some of that "Southern woman mack-truckedness" you have! :)

Funny what has been said about the peanut butter. I get a brand out here in eastern MA called Teddy and it contains 1. peanuts and 2. salt (or you can get unsalted). I was having PB & crackers at work with some peanut butter someone had brought in (either J*f or Sk***y, some brand I hadn't had since I was a kid) and it tasted odd; I looked at the label and was kind of shocked. Why the hell would someone put sugar in peanut butter???!!!??? Is there so much corn in this country that stuff has to be sweetend with high-fructose corn syrup just to get rid of it?

Not that anyone's going to see this comment anyway.

So that's the plural of Clooney! The world needs more Cloonies.

Here is an amazing easy automated breakfast recipe-

Mix 1 cup vanilla yogurt, 1 cup old fashioned oats (the kind in the canister, not quick-cook). You can also add cinnamon, 1/2 apple chopped, nuts, dried fruits, or other tasty things.
Mix together, cover, and refrigerate overnight. Saves time in the morning since its already made. Microwave optional because its good both hot and cold.

I mix this in tupperwear and bring it to work every morning.

This is a simplified version of something called Bircher Muesli. It is deee-licious and the fuel lasts till lunch without wearing off.

I think the "double wide cat scratcher" has a double meaning, just saying....

I'm really automated. I eat an apple every day for breakfast. Only. Honey Crisp when I can get them; otherwise Braeburn. If I eat cereal or toast--I'm hungry in 2 hours. Nothing about an apple apparently wakes up the taste buds. My husband eats old fashioned oatmeal with raisins for breakfast. Every day. 90 sec. in the microwave--no more, no less.

Eeeeeeeee! Laurie answered my question!!!!!

Seriously, thanks! I have "one of those faces" that makes people want to tell me their life stories - useful when I was a working reporter, but it kind of freaks other people out. I remember meeting one of my ex- childhood friends and telling my ex- later, "Did you know that Bob used to be married to a Tahitian woman who tragically died of lung cancer?" or something like that and him saying, "No, Bob has never told me that, and we've been friends since childhood!"

Perhaps you attract the weirdos because you look kind and nice and they think you won't haul off and hit them? People can sense when a person is kind; stray animals and babies gravitate to my Frank like he's Dr. Doolittle - it's really weird.

But you just go on being you - and change seats on the bus when you have to!

I love the way you write - someday, you are going to have to select the best essays from this blog and put them in a book. Seriously.

Makes you wonder if "automating" meals is somehow instinctive. I have to make an effort to get variety into my diet, because I honestly want to eat the same stuff all the time. I've given up on breakfast: every day is a toasted fruit-n-nut Powerbagel from Einstein Bros with a light scraping of peanut butter. Lunch is almost always either leftovers from the previous dinner or hummus and sliced veggies on whole grain bread. Occasionally I go wild and have some soup, instead. ;)

I live alone and often cook for an army, leaving me with piles of tupperwared (is that a verb?) leftovers that I happily munch my way through over the next week. I really think I would waste away without a crockpot.

Also, do not stand between me and any dish involving lentils and brown rice. You WILL be trampled. Strangely, this is the reaction I used to have to chocolate. On the whole, I think I'm better off with my current food obsession...!

Laurie, one of these days I've got to send you some of the catnip from my backyard. This stuff is lethal. It's not kitty pot, it's kitty crack. Something in the soil?

WOW.

I read your last post, but couldn't comment. I have been working my way towards this same way of eating for a while. I also automate breakfast and lunch...and because I have two children with busy schedules have also kind of automated dinner...with certain nights being certain meals (Wednesday is sushi because I have my knitting group!)

Good luck! I too am a Dork Magnet and when I was skinny had the unwanted attention magnet. I have developed a nice scowl now that sends em packing!

What IS is that makes us Southern gals put ourselves dead last with NOTHING left for ourselves at the end of the day? It's like we have a genetically-encoded contest for who can be the biggest martyr, but nobody ever tells us what the prize is if we win.

My husband is the one who gets bored with food. I could eat cereal for breakfast, and tuna salad, peanut butter or swiss/avacado sandwich for lunch every day forever. Wheat bread of course.

Up until I was about 26, I lived off exactly that, and soup and salad or ramen noodles for dinner. I was a TWIG. I wasn't "on a diet," that's just what I ate because it was cheap and relatively nutritious. And sometimes Chinese takeout, because it was cheap, and I had leftovers for the next day.

I love my knitting, it is the only thing that is 100 percent MINE.

It cracks me up that the cat scratcher that Sobakowa is lounging on says on the side "Double-Wide Cat Scratcher." Double-wide? How humiliating for poor Sobakowa!

Laurie - not only do you have Dr. R reading (and responding to) your blog, you also have a scrapbooking celebrity! I just happened to notice a comment left to you by Cathy Z. who is pretty well known in the industry! You are a supahstah girl!

Glad it's working for you.

The only way to really get rid of the annoying octopi that turn up in unexpected places is to be insulting and hurtful. Sadly it's the only thing that works for them. Of course you'll get called names, but they'll back off. Being nice or even vaguely polite only makes them think they have a chance so they try even harder.

We're pulling for you, Laurie!

My favorite "automatic" lunch is 1/2 cup trail mix (I literally keep a bag of Costco trail mix with a measuring cup in it at work), 1-2 sticks of string cheese, and a piece of fruit. I'm a teacher, so 25 minutes for lunch means automation all the way.

My husband and I are on the blood type diet (a diet in the non-weight-loss sense, though that's a byproduct) and that is helping us to feel healthier all over.

anyway, I delurked to tell you about string cheese. Can't decide if that's a good thing...

I never comment but I read your blog everyday. I'm also trying to just eat healthy and trying to not to freak out if I have something "bad". Most of the time depriving myself of something makes me want it a million times more. Anyway, not sure if you've checked out these lunch boxes (http://www.laptoplunches.com/) but the website has really good ideas for healthy lunches and it really does encourage me to bring my lunch everyday. Plus the best part is that the lunch box is cute (I have the pink one) and there's even a fun flickr group where people post photos of their lunches (I don't because I'm too shy). Good luck!

"I thought it was about food, but I think it might be about being selfish, the good kind of selfish where you treat yourself the same way you'd treat a cherished boyfriend or spouse or child."

::amen::

Sue F: I read your comment. I read them all, every day!

And I could not agree more with the peanut butter thing... why the heck are they putting High-fructose corn syrup in peanut butter?? It's also in wheat bread, and it was on Gorton's salmon fillets, too.

I hate the High Frictose Corn People, they're out to ruin me, I am sure of it!! LOL

High fructose corn syrup is used by the industry because it's cheap, cheap, cheap! Who cares about our health, it's all about the bottom line! Which is why regular corn syrup is also used alot instead of real sugar. The industry defends itself by saying that hfcs is natural because it comes from corn. But the end result is not the same, it's been chemically altered.

As you may know, Laurie, the original Dr Pepper plant is in Dublin, Texas. On occasion they will crank out the original recipe using real sugar and when the stores around Texas can get their hands on it (you can't always find it) it sells out quick. Chicken Express (I know, fast food!) here advertises the authentic fountain real sugar Dr Pepper. I don't drink alot of cokes at all but I do like this stuff whenever I have it (about once a year). I can tell the difference between the cokes made with hfcs and the real thing, it tastes better, IMO.

And hfcs is everywhere these days! You really have to watch ingredients for it. Also watch out for those nasty trans fats. But staying away, for the most part if you can, from packaged and processed food helps alot.

For what it's worth, my husband also appears to be a "crazy magnet"! and that's what he calls it too! I have seen this in action. Both of sitting waiting for a train and crazy woman comes up and starts talking to him out of the blue!

My IT person doesn't care; he's not in-house. Oh, I get my PB organic from Whole Foods. Yeah, I heard that about regular PB.

i know this is like comment #8756732429, but in case it hasn't been mentioned yet: a way i found to eat healthier/boring-er (and cheaper!) at work AND get around the fact that i'm too lazy to pack a lunch every day is that i keep stuff to make a sandwich in the communal fridge at work. on monday during lunch i go to the supermarket and buy a loaf of bread, some sliced turkey/ham/whatever and some cheese, and make myself a sandwich every day at lunch. that way the food is right here, already paid for, and i have no excuses to waste it by going out AND i don't have to get up early enough to make something. this only works if you're ok with the same-food-every-day thing, too. also, if i have friends going out to eat, i usually make and eat my sandwich, then just go out and gab with them. and maybe buy a cookie. :-)

OMG, yer freakin' famous! Yes, first time commentator, but my friend and I have been reading you religiously. Like, you're our only knitting blog we read, and we don't read you for your knitting. Whatever. You're either in the mood or not. No stress.
So the breakfast/lunch thing: I've been doing that for years, mostly b/c I think I'm ocd and that's where the knitting comes in real strong. I've had a 'fridge where I work for a few years (several work places; don't ask), and I tend towards the yogurt/chewy granola bar for b/fast and a turkey sandwich w/ sprouts for lunch... maybe a bit of something for a snack... oh, an ENTIRE bag of popcorn or something.) Dinner, I have several recipies that I like to whip up (maybe two of them) over the weekend. I'll send you recipies. I need to get them on the computer anyway, as co-irkers are harassing me about them. No diet for dinner.

Don't know if you've listened to the old Firesign Theatre, or the like, but there's this funny bit there: guy goes to weight watchers... they talk about substitutions... he quits... comes back WAY skinnier. They ask, "how have you done it?", he says, "Substitutions. Dinner? Two gin and tonics. Lunch?" Well, you get the idea. Hilarious!

So anyway, dinner. No diet for dinnner. Be european. Eat the way you want, and have a drink to boot. Watch an episode of [fill in the blank], and if you're still hungry, eat some more. What the heck.

In the meantime, I'll try to jot down my fav dinner recipies (cooked on Sundays... b/c who has time to cook on weekdays). Just for a pre-view, there's Mom's Meatloaf (really, it's good!), chicken stew (mostly stuff you have in the pantry), potroast (don't shudder), bangers and mash (ditto), and Mafe (a peanut butter/chicken stew w/ frozen veg, etc) from Senegal (I was in the Peace Corps, what can I say).

Love to you, always,
Alice-from-Texas

And another thing...
So the unwanted attention. I can totally relate to that from my PC service. I mean, I drank more than I've ever drunk in my LIFE simply b/c it was a total assualt (sometimes literally) just to leave my house. Geez! But a friend of mine taught me how to cultivate my "inner asshole." Granted, I have an "outer child" so I need some sort of psychic protector. Mostly, tho, I use my "i'm ignoring you" thing. In fact, it's sad to say but, I actually ignore most people I don't know. It's not intentional. Maybe I've programmed my subconcious or something, but I've had this ability for a long time. Still, it does nothing for the public jerks; it only keeps me from the decent men who, being more subtle, I tend to ignore.

What to do? Dunno. Cultivate the inner asshole. Channel Oprah. Other folks say things like, "believe you're worth the best," and such, but really, a person can't do that right off. No way. My thing? One "asshole" moment a week. After a few (months?) go to once a day. Really. As Southern women, once a week is plenty.

I'm here to tell you, the West African Bus Sneak Grind from Behind SUCKS ASS. Hang in there, man. I'm with you.

Laurie, thanks for quoting me. I was so surprised you noticed that with, what, 36,000 comments. I really love your post and I need to print out this part for me

"I thought it was about food, but I think it might be about being selfish, the good kind of selfish where you treat yourself the same way you'd treat a cherished boyfriend or spouse or child."

I need to remember that after my fun phone call last night. Too bad we can't turn ourselves in to protective services.

Thanks again so much.

But don't forget...
Don't forget to eat the good stuff. Don't give up all the saturated fats in the healthy eating. I've found that eating good, dark chocolate after dinner is a great dessert and I don't eat too much. It's so rich you just eat a little. Don't give up good cheese. And maybe find a good wine that you really like and would drink with dinner, not only for its alcohol but for the way it complements your meal. Dinner without wine is almost uncivilized, and you are definitely embarked on a journey to civilize your food life.

As you go through this, I would bet your palate settles down and your taste buds sharpen and subtle tastes become stronger.
I'm so glad you are eating foods you enjoy and think about and choose in a conscious way. There's a world of wonderful food out there that you can enjoy and be healthy while eating. Bon app!!!!!

this is my first time reading and commenting, but since it's related, reading the books "overcoming overeating" and "when women stop hating their bodies" dramatically changed my relationship with food. learning how to trust your body and eat whatever you want but stop when you're full is the no-diet/anti-diet that worked for me, physically and mentally. no more stress about food or my weight, and i really do eat whatever i feel like, whenever i'm hungry. it's awesome.

I love your bit about southern women coming last & going crazy. Thanks, you made my night. (Can I offer you a screaming kid? Maybe two or three?)

"I don't know exactly how I will deal with unwanted male interaction if I get thinner. "

Not if. *When* you get thinner, dear heart.

And I read Beth's comments and was like, what sounds crazy? Then, oh. Oh, yeah. The "becoming invisible" part. Me, I thought that sounded totally normal.

Have you considered having the pepper spray out on your lap with your finger on the button? Just a suggestion...

Alliluja, or smth like that

Alliluja, or smth like that