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November 22, 2006
My Hairstory: The Final Chapter
When we last left off, our hairoine (HAHAHA!!! HAIRoine!! Yeah I may have been drinking when I came up with that gem) was sporting one somewhat poufy flat-top haircut, a move that may not seem particularly daring in this day and age when young people do things like "hard drugs" and also "try to be Paris Hilton and make a sex tape with kids from their 9th grade Spanish class," but trust me. When I was 13 and living way out on the bayou, it was a big deal.
My parents saw the demonic gleam in my eye of pure, unadulterated rebellion. They sighed. Then they said, "Well, she has always been a little different..." "Unusual!" "A real original, that is for sure." My father said, "Let the girl do what she wants to her hair. It's her hair...." My brothers said, "You're a dumbass!" and sometimes, "Oh my God, sis, what the (bleep) did you do to your HAIR?"
And the thing about a poufy flat-top? It grows out. Really fast. Especially if you have freakishly fast-growing hair anyway. But at first it wasn't too bad:

In fact, my fashion was worse than my hair. I kind of thought I had a Nick Rhodes thing going and since I was secretly planning to marry Nick Rhodes when he finally came to Middle Of Nowhere, Louisiana looking for me, BECAUSE I LOVED HIM THAT MUCH, anyway ... I was okay with my no-longer-flat-top.
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But then... ya'll know.
My hair got as bad as my fashion REALQUICKLIKE.

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Now, I'm posting this next picture just because it may be the funniest get-up I (or anyone on the planet) has ever deemed "fashionable" and also "worthy to wear in public while thinking I AM SO HOT." Hee hee. I saved allowance for WEEKS for this outfit! That is an ESPRIT bag, people, genuine cloth ESPRIT! Notice I am also rocking the partial side-ponytail:

As you can see, I was all about the fashion.
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But I was at a crossroads from a hair perspective. What could I do with my basically normal, wavy bob? I mean, sure, I had the side ponytail with colored scrunchie to jazz things up. I had my pegged jeans and colored Converse and thirty-two pairs of socks on over my pants legs, but what could I possibly do to make myself even MORE FETCHING?
PERHAPS A WHITE GIRL 'FRO?

Yeah. That is the only existing picture of this hairstyle, taken on the day I got the actual perm. Three days later, I washed my hair and I lost all my beautiful curls. I cried. I moussed to no avail. I cried some more. How could I ever make my hair truly incredibly glorious?
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And the answer, darling innernets, was clear:

The side-part mohawk. My greatest accomplishment in Freaking Out The Parents. God, I was so cool. I was so awesome. I was ... so grounded.
After I managed to get un-grounded, I found my way back to the very person who had helped me with the side-mohawk bob, and we remastered it for Version Two: The asymmetrical side-part mohawk bob.

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Of course, as time went by, my hair began to grow out, my summer dragged on, and suddenly I woke up and realized that as much as I loved my crazyhair, it would not ever win me the affections of one Martin Daniel, who I was Now In Love With and Must Marry.
So, all summer I let my hair grow and ditched my SO SO COOL neon pastel clothes in an effort to become Pretty, and also, Mrs. Martin Daniel. At this time in the South, it was very important to have big hair (or at least a big wall of bangs) to be considered Pretty. I practiced in my bathroom with a curling iron and a can of Aquanet until flies were literally stuck in mid-air. My family coughed dramatically each time they passed the bathroom door, but deep down inside you know they were happy because perhaps we had at least reached the end of the WHAT THE HELL HAS SHE DONE TO HER HAIR?? years.
Achieving greatness in the bangs department was really hard for my small, flat, pathetically straight hair. I began with the side-wall bangs:

Check out the acid washed skirt! Hot!
Eventually moved on to the Basic Front Curl:

(You know my parents were like, "She wants another watch for her birthday? Fine. It'll be dead in an hour. Serves her right. Throwing away money. Kids these days..." etc. etc.)
Got some leverage on the Updraft:

AQUA NET, how I loved thee. Sorry, Ozone layer.
Discovered hot rollers for the sides:

Hi, blue eyeshadow!
And finally, after years of hard work, I made it in the Wall O'Bangs world:

And so concludes my Hairstory. That inpenetrable mountain of hair fabulosity was to this day the hardest and also most rewarding thing about high school. On a good day I was closer to heaven... on a bad day (read: rain) I would literally cry in anguish. I carried a butane curling iron with me everywhere I went. I had travel-size cans of hairspray in every strength lining the shelves of my locker, my vanity at home and the glove compartment of my car. I carried a pick, a teasing comb and a brush. I was perhaps more committed to that hair than any other thing either before or since.
Since reaching the dizzying heights of greatness in my bangs, it's all been downhill in the hair department. Boring, basic, straight, blunt-cut hair. It takes approximately 1/1000th of the time to style my hair these days, and for that I should be thankful. But you know deep-down inside I kind of miss my big bangs. Just a teensy little bit.
Happy Thanksgiving, ya'll! Hug the family, eat some turkey and stay away from the AquaNet! And if you just can't keep away from the spray, be sure to at least take some really embarrassing pictures... for posterity's sake.
Posted by laurie at November 22, 2006 11:06 AM
Comments
tough being *first*!
Posted by: smokeyJoe at November 22, 2006 10:36 AM
I had the Wall O' Bangs too. That was after my mom forced the Dorothy Hammill cut on me.
Posted by: Mary at November 22, 2006 10:38 AM
you know, the side mohawk just wasn't what i imagined...much much more...um...unique!
Posted by: smokeyJoe (again) at November 22, 2006 10:41 AM
Love the hair-story! Thanks for always brightening my day.
Posted by: Anne at November 22, 2006 10:42 AM
Fabulous story-telling! Thanks so much for sharing your ... um, growing pains.
Tell the truth, now. You're already writing a book, aren't you? You just want it to be a surprise?
Posted by: ccr in MA at November 22, 2006 10:44 AM
Thanks SO MUCH, Laurie for putting this on your blog. We all looked bad/went through fashion and hair disasters, but at least we can laugh about it now. BTW: I would have battled it out with you to be the Future Mrs. Nick Rhodes. He had the *best* hair! LOL
Happy Gobble-Gobble!
Darci
Posted by: darcidoodle at November 22, 2006 10:46 AM
You are too funny! Love your blog, it makes my day. BTW, can't believe you didn't comment on the s-e-x-y tan lines on your shoulders!
Posted by: texasjackie at November 22, 2006 10:47 AM
Heh, butane curling iron. I had one of those, too *shame*
Have a happy Thanksgiving!
Posted by: e. at November 22, 2006 10:52 AM
love the tan lines in that last pic, too!
Posted by: minnie at November 22, 2006 10:52 AM
What a fun walk down memory lane! Remember, candles and an Aquanetted couf also do not mix.
Posted by: balou at November 22, 2006 10:55 AM
I hate to have to break this to you all but it was ME who was going to marry Nick Rhodes. I even taught my toddler nephew to refer to him as Uncle Nicky.
Nick Rhodes with his pink hair and skinny tie...I pine for thee.....
Posted by: TamiW at November 22, 2006 10:56 AM
You are so dang cute no matter what is on top of your head and the fact that you have something inside that head makes you ever cuter.
My hairstory pictures are posted, come by for laugh.
Happy Thanksgiving!!!
Posted by: psychomom at November 22, 2006 10:57 AM
Laurie...
Ok, I had the "Cindy Lauper tic tac toe" shaved into the side of my half mullet head. I can so relate to you and your hair story. How are your cats doing? Are they aware of the pending TURKEY feast? Are they getting any goodies? I hope you have a WONDERFUL Thanksgiving. I am thankful for the laughs and wonderful stories you give me, and all of your faithful blog readers!
From TEXAS!!!
San Antonio, to be exact!
Christina
Posted by: Christina at November 22, 2006 10:57 AM
OH MY GOD.. you are too much.. and you just relived my whole eighties for me. thanks for the reminders.. I was so going to Marry John Taylor and knew if I dressed like him he would see the appeal in my beauty.. hahahah. oh well. thanks seriously.. for making me laugh.. thats a true gift.. and you write brilliantly.. Have a Fantastic Thanksgiving..
Posted by: eLiZaBeTh at November 22, 2006 11:00 AM
Oooh! I had a permed asymmetrical bob for a while!
And I LOVED NICK!! He was supposed to come to MY hick town and marry me and take me away!
Posted by: Jeannie at November 22, 2006 11:02 AM
It's just like watching my daughter grow up all over again, . . . except for the mohawk thing. She is a little younger than you but tried to dress like the big girls. Remember the floppy cotton net type hair ribbons??? You girls are soooo cute.
hugs, a mom.
Posted by: Barb at November 22, 2006 11:05 AM
TexasJackie and Minnie - ditto on the tan lines!
And Purl, at least you were able to create some kind of style out of your hair. Once I hit high school, the most dramatic change I could muster to reinvent myself was to start parting my hair on the side. (And the middle part back when my hair was still stick straight was also not a great look.) The frizz hit in the mid/late teens and there was no winning... I had the wave bang, but even that was a disaster. I would have killed for your hair! (Though honestly, I wouldn't have put the effort into it.)
And your ensemble of pride and joy with the umpteen socks and the jeans tucked in...wow, that took me back to junior high. We were all about pegging the pants and scrunching the socks...and those pleated jeans to make you look extra hippy in the middle - what the hell were we all thinking?
Posted by: Tami at November 22, 2006 11:05 AM
I would kill for straight dull hair - you've inspired me to tell my own hairstory. Read it and be glad for your straight hair...
Posted by: Michelle at November 22, 2006 11:08 AM
For several years my hair was styled by aiming the blow dryer and shooting it with LA Looks, which when you washed your hair after using copious amounts of it for support, you know, to guard against the wind from blowing through your hair, it left VINYL residue in your hair. It was a great style, I wish I could find that picture. And you know, I was so going to marry John Taylor DuranDuran's bassist. He was going to pull up any minute in a limo and whisk me away to England.
Posted by: Christine at November 22, 2006 11:11 AM
Though all the pictures were awe-inspiring and brought the flash-back, my favorite is the acid-washed skirt picture. THE epitome of classic smart-ass teenage girl!! Unlevel shoulders, hip jutting out and an expression that says it all! Girl, you could've given lessons on that look! The EYE-ROLL of DOOOOOOM couldn't have been far behind!
I perfected that look at 10. Used to drive my older siblings INSANE!! My hat is off to you! I never could wear a hat well!!
Posted by: mctwin at November 22, 2006 11:12 AM
I still have my Esprit cloth bag. It's sitting under my desk right now with knitting in it. Sigh. But I did get rid of my poodle do. Does that count?
Posted by: Marilyn at November 22, 2006 11:16 AM
If we didn't go through those days of crazy hair and weird outfits where would we be today? Doing them now!
You go girl!!
Posted by: Lesley at November 22, 2006 11:19 AM
Ha ha -- I knew that there had to be some acidwash in the back catalog! And the throat pin at the collar of big shirt.
You're pretty dang cute in all those photos, I must say. If we had looked cool throughout our entire childhood, what would we have to laugh at now??
Posted by: cant_talk_knitting at November 22, 2006 11:23 AM
Thank you for a fun retrospective that made me want to dig out my old pictures and reminicse (or however you spell it) over such favorites as "The Pixiecut", "The Nuclear Perm Disaster", and, everyone's favorite, "The Don't-I-Look-Exactly-Like-Farrah-Faucet" monstrosity of huge, flipped-back wings that I wore for at least 10 years! Cringe! You are such a good sport, Laurie, and I think that's one reason you're so darn likable.
I would also like to invite you to check out my blog tomorrow where I am confessing the shameful condition of my home with lots of pictures. Lots of messy, chaotic room-porn for peeping.
Posted by: Criquette at November 22, 2006 11:28 AM
Happy Thanksgiving Laurie!
I'm so glad you shared your hair (even the frightening asymmetrical side-part mohawk bob) (is that how bob got his name?) and your highly memory invoking pegged leg with sock jeans ;)
Posted by: cursingmama at November 22, 2006 11:29 AM
Have you heard of the quirkyalone movement? I think one of the top 5 clues in the identification of a quirkyalone is the asymmetrical haircut in high school. You've gone above and beyond...
Posted by: DeAnna at November 22, 2006 11:29 AM
Auntie, you just keep getting cuter.
Butane curling irons? What the hell were we thinking?
Posted by: Cookie at November 22, 2006 11:31 AM
Happy Thanksgiving, Laurie! Thanks for the memories! Painful, though they are.
Posted by: Jann at November 22, 2006 11:33 AM
Oh, the wall o' bangs. Fond memories. I remember more than one gathering of chicks getting ready to go out, spraying Aquanet and smoking cigarettes. It's a wonder we were immolated.
Posted by: Sonya at November 22, 2006 11:40 AM
At one time I also had a hair style which required that I carry a butane curling iron with me everywhere. I can not imagine going to that extreme for my hair style now, though.
Posted by: Vanessa at November 22, 2006 11:41 AM
love the wall of bangs! i had my own wall as well.
thanks for doing this - your hairstory wrap up is all i have keeping me going here at work until they let us go home early today!
Posted by: melissa at November 22, 2006 11:47 AM
Nick was mine people. Mine.
I must admit, I am also somewhat responsible for the hole in said ozone. My aquanet was free flowing.
Also, I have got to say, the side part mohawk. Yeesh. What was your hair dresser thinking! At least you have the excuse of being a juvenile but really - twice!!!?
Posted by: Faith at November 22, 2006 11:47 AM
I still have my butane curling iron!
Sing with me now, thermacell will set you free any style you want to be no plugs no cords no batteries...
Thanks for the laugh and the memories!
Posted by: Tami R. at November 22, 2006 11:48 AM
I'm as serious as a heart attack when I say I laughed til I cried reading this. It's a good thing I'm alone at work today.
Posted by: martha in mobile at November 22, 2006 11:54 AM
Laurie, u r hilarious!!!!LOL LOL We've all gone thru our "hair" days back in the day, I know I sure as hell have you wouldn't believe the haircuts I've had along with the goofy glasses which I thought were "cool" back in the day!
Posted by: Dilenia at November 22, 2006 11:56 AM
OMG! I think I had that Esprit bag!
Posted by: Jenn at November 22, 2006 11:56 AM
Hehe, boyfriend asked me how I knew a South County girl when I saw one and I replied, "By the Aquanet hairstyle." When he asked how I knew she used Aquanet; I told him that those bangs are only achieved by Aquanet. He didn't get it. Thanks for the time-travel, we've all had those bags, jeans, socks...
Posted by: Amy in StL at November 22, 2006 11:56 AM
Y'all could have had Nick… Roger was mine mine mine. Especially after I hacked off my spiral perm (!) for the inch-long-all-over-my-head-except for the flippy bangs do.
Yeesh. Would that I had listened to the appalled hairdresser in the next station over who begged -- nay, implored -- me not to do it.
Thanks for the flashbacks!
Posted by: Kelly at November 22, 2006 11:56 AM
Those pictures really took me back. I was so jealous in school because one of the girls had the wall-o-bangs that you could push down with one hand and they would pop right back up. The best I could manage was friz.
Posted by: Mindy at November 22, 2006 12:00 PM
As someone who has had pretty much the same haircut since third grade (just longer and shorter), I'm fascinated with all of your hair choices. I think I've counted you having at least 25 different hair styles so far. Do all women change their hair styles so often? If you put all of your photos into a time capsule, future generations will be able to understand women's hair styles of the late twentieth century - 2006.
(by the way, the perm WASN'T for you)
Happy thanksgiving. What style are you wearing your hair for your Thanksgiving dinner? Like a Pilgrim?
Posted by: Neil at November 22, 2006 12:11 PM
Alyssa Milano would have been proud! What a classic Great Hair of the 80's story.
Posted by: Sarah at November 22, 2006 12:14 PM
Love the hairstory! Reminds me of my sister and her middle of the head pouf 'o bangs. We used to hack our way past her room too. She carried all the same things you did and so did all of her friends. The girl's bathrooms/gym change room at the high school used to be deadly to your health.
Posted by: Dorothy B at November 22, 2006 12:18 PM
Hyperventilating.
Too funny.
Great way to end this week! (other than on a Wednesday.)
Posted by: Laci at November 22, 2006 12:18 PM
Girl, that cut was SO NORMAL, I can't believe you are even ashamed of it. Because I was picturing you with an ACTUAL half-mohawk, which in my neck of the woods was called "skater hair". It was that picture, except instead of the cute little pouf, the WHOLE SIDE OF YOUR HEAD from the part down would have been shaved.
Posted by: Carrie at November 22, 2006 12:39 PM
Laurie, Tami W and Faith: Bugger off!!! Nick is mine!! All mine!!
Posted by: Jeannie at November 22, 2006 12:45 PM
Girl, that is not white girl 'fro. I had white girl 'fro. You got the perm I wanted when I went to get my hair done just before starting high school. I got Richard Simmons. No, really. My hair looked just like his. They told me not to wash it for a day and not to use conditioner for a while because it would kill the curls... so I soaked my head in Agree conditioner and sat in the bathtub for two hours, hoping all the curl would fall out, but it didn't help. I was never as into hair as you and that was the only time I have ever cried over bad hair. If I knew where my high school yearbook was I would dig out the picture -- yes, the Richard Simmons perm got immortalized in the high school yearbook.
Douglas Adams said a learning experience is one that tells you, "you know that thing you just did? Don't do that again." That perm was a learning experience. I learned: a) probably don't ever perm my hair again, but b) definitely do not get a hairstyle you have never tried before at important times such as just before starting high school.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Posted by: sunflower at November 22, 2006 12:49 PM
Anyone else ever aquanet her hair so crispy for the high-school formal that she had to ake a bath and SOAK it out? Ahhhhhh aquanet- love that wall 'o hair!
What are you doing for Turkey Day, Miss Laurie?
I'll be going south (LongBeach) to see my crazy-ass family and feed the kitties turkey-flavored cat food (I sneak gravy onto the dog's kibble too- shh! don't tell! )
Posted by: Susan at November 22, 2006 12:57 PM
Oh my goodness, you just reminded me of middle school and high school. One of my best friends had the wall o'bangs, and she even started going blind in her left eye from looking through it all the time. She had to make it way shorter and smaller after that. She loved NKotB.
Me, I was the geek with the long hair in braids or a bun. Yup, no boyfriends for me in high school.
Posted by: Carina at November 22, 2006 01:03 PM
This has been kind of scary, because I've had almost every single one of the hairstyles you've shown, down to the short boy-hair-and-holding-a-fish pic. My hair was never long, though, but the perms, the bangs, etc., all the same.
Posted by: melissa at November 22, 2006 01:18 PM
OMG! I had the Wall 'O Bangs, too. And the addiction to the curling iron because my hair was too straight and didn't make that fabulous touch 'o curl I strove for. And the hairspray-them-until-a-hurricane-wouldn't-move-them strategy. And the dread of rain. Wow. Memories. Good times. Good times.
Posted by: Jeanne at November 22, 2006 01:20 PM
Hah! I went straight from the gently-waved Princess Diana look to clipping the sides of my head almost back to the skin. Yay mohawks!!
Posted by: Peeve at November 22, 2006 01:22 PM
Brave, brave girl.
Posted by: Mary in Virginia at November 22, 2006 01:28 PM
3rd picture from the last... the model rotating hair flip...I have almost the exact same photo of myself!
Baby fine hair doesn't do much without hairspray. It drives my husband nuts that the floor by the bathroom mirror is always sticky. Pump hairspray, I have a bottle stashed everywhere. Very enjoyable series, thanks for making me laugh, again!
Posted by: robinv at November 22, 2006 01:33 PM
I thought I was the only one in the world who loved Nick Rhodes. At least I thought I did. As an adult I realize I just wanted to look like him because he was so pretty.
Posted by: Jennifer at November 22, 2006 01:50 PM
OMG, the side mohawk is hilarious! It wasn't at all what I was expecting and even funnier. It looks like you had some gum that got stuck right there where your part was... and then had to meet the scissors. LOL.
I have my own hilarious 80's stories. I had an extremely short boy haircut, almost like the flattop you had, but not really flat. Then I wore men's pajamas with a tie, a suit jacket and full-on Annie Lennox makeup! Oh the horror of it all! I thought that was sooooo hot!
Keep on posting Laurie, I keep hoping one of these days I'll run into you since I also live in LA (along with the other 3,799,999 other people). Of course that would mean I'd actually have to leave my house!
Posted by: janel at November 22, 2006 02:02 PM
Wow. What a great series of posts. Loved it! Thanks! : )
Have a great Thanksgiving.
Posted by: Ang at November 22, 2006 02:07 PM
Ever had the whole back of your head shaved off? Then put the Perm of Death in what remained of your hair on the front half of your head? Boys and girls, the word for the day is "Lightsocket."
Posted by: AlliMack at November 22, 2006 02:25 PM
you are too cute ... your esprit outfit made me snort.
hee hee
Posted by: maryse at November 22, 2006 03:12 PM
I, too, love the Esprit outfit. Back in the day, I didn't actually own any Esprit, but I did have a "Swatch" and I wore several layers of clothing on all levels, and also wore "Love's Baby Soft." And because I had (and still have) a deep and abiding love for somewhat geeky guys, I was totally in love with and going to marry Rick Astley, and also John Cusack. They were going to fight over me, because my hair was pulled back into a big barrette at the back of my head with the Wall o'Bangs in front. And listen y'all: I am so not making fun. I miss those days! When there was still a possibility of Rick and John fighting over me, and I could do all sorts of crazy to my hair and my clothing and not be considered totally out of the ordinary!
Laurie, thank you for sharing your Hairstory, because I enjoyed it so much. :) Happy Thanksgiving!
Posted by: Julie at November 22, 2006 03:40 PM
When you called it a side-part mohawk, I was expecting something much worse. Oh, and I was watching Conan O'Brien last night, and I realized that your Grace flat-toppy-do looks a lot like Conan's hair - especially in the shot from the other day with the REALLY PRETTY dress.
Also, I had the cool colored Converse and layers of socks. But, I was way cooler than you were... I actually alternated the colors from one leg to the next (example: right leg = pink on bottom, green on top; left leg = green on bottom, pink on top). How cool was I? And, needless to say, my sock drawer was ordered by color and was one of the large drawers on the bottom of my dresser, not one of the little ones most people put socks in.
Posted by: Krista at November 22, 2006 03:56 PM
totally forgot about the butane curling iron!
I also wore multiple swatches at one time -- you never know when you'll need to know what time it is in Europe!
Posted by: kristin at November 22, 2006 04:42 PM
Oh yes, the wall of bangs! I not only rocked them, I joined the Army with them! Already perilously short of sleep, I got up extra early to keep the big bangs going. Before basic training, I actually went and got a perm *just for my bangs* to keep them big and fluffy. The guys in my unit referred to them as the "Hawaii 5-0 bangs" because they made this huge wave off my forehead.
I deployed to Kuwait with a duffle bag full of hairspray and my faithful butane curling iron. And a lot of mascara. But enough butane refills to last or years. Because you can't defend a country with limp bangs. 13 years later, I still occasionally find the odd butane mini-tank tucked away in some drawer.
And the converse? I had a pink pair that I hot glued LACE all over.
This hair retrospective has been so fun to read! Thanks for sharing.
Posted by: Becca at November 22, 2006 04:54 PM
Omigod! I so had the Esprit bag. Had totally forgotten about it until you mentioned it. I also rocked my Esprit boots in at least four different colors. Then again, around here was Esprit central. An acquaintance (Back then I would have said "friend" but she really wasn't a friend. Just someone sat near me in Algebra 2 and we were too cool for the rest of the folks in the class. Especially since she was a junior and I was a sophomore.). Where was I? Oh yeah. My acquaintance was the ultimate of cool being an Esprit model and all.
And Nick Rhodes? Part of what sucked me into the SF underground club scene in the mid-80s was this guy, Vic. Because he was a dead ringer for Nick Rhodes. Squeeeeeeeeal!
Posted by: Dagny at November 22, 2006 05:10 PM
Oh, and unfortunately there are not any photos of my asymmetrical haircut. Layers of curls going from left to right. The longest part of my hair barely touched the top of my ear.
Posted by: Dagny at November 22, 2006 05:12 PM
I have been reading your blog for over a year now...I have enjoyed every post you make and look forward to it every day. I miss you when you don't blog and worry about you. You have made me laugh and cry at the same time. I wish I lived near you so we could hang out....have a great Thanksgiving and I am thankful to have you as a "friend" to read everyday. Oh yeah..the hair... the styles, the weather, the color, the perms... men don't know how lucky they are. I once did the blow dryer aimed at the side of my head with the hairspray glue in place...thank God I can't find those pictures! Happy Turkey Day!
Posted by: Eileen at November 22, 2006 05:13 PM
Thank God I'd be hard pressed to find any of the baaad photos of me with my giant blue eyeglasses (that my mom swears are still so cute, but are long gone), and short triangle shaped hair. Ugh. Thank goodness for wisdom. Happy T-Bird Day, Laurie! You rock!!
Posted by: marissa at November 22, 2006 05:19 PM
Oh god. I had the SAME "slouch socks" worn over my jeans that I PAID to have tapered. With a Benetton rugby shirt. And an Espirit bag. And I had a million dead watches- some of them in pastels.
Sadly, not only did I look less cute because of my blue, acid wash-esque plastic glasses that clashed with my blue eyeshadow, unlike you, my assymetrical bobs could never be coaxed to have any side part mohawks and my hair is too heavy for Wall O' Bangs. Maybe we used less Aquanet in Nova Scotia than in the Bayou?
Posted by: radmama at November 22, 2006 05:29 PM
I forgot about the belts! The giant shirts over skinny pants adorned with belts that HELD NOTHING UP. Oh, the 80's.
Happy American Thanksgiving!
Posted by: radmama at November 22, 2006 05:31 PM
My E-bag comes out when there's heavy shopping to do...It's ratty like nobody's business...but no one really cares about such things now-a-days, eh?
I was too scared of the spray for wall of bangs, but bring on the feathered bangs, oh yeah, baby light my fire...
Posted by: Mary (Seattle) at November 22, 2006 05:59 PM
Too funny I went through much the same hair story as you! I too achieved the wall o'bangs my senior year in High School, you can tell we must be close to the same age!!!
Happy Turkey Day!
Posted by: Michelle at November 22, 2006 06:08 PM
*clap*clap*clap*
Standing ovation.
Thanks for the trip down memory lane.
I've always wondered about the hair obsessed girls in highschool. Now I know...I suppose.
Posted by: haji 0 matic at November 22, 2006 06:45 PM
OMG. You SO remind me of a friend of mine who changed her hairstyle as often as you did!! I was never so brave. I had the same hair style for YEARS. I'm a ninny when it comes to hair and color and styling....
Posted by: Lynn at November 22, 2006 06:55 PM
Is your brother still a hottie?
Posted by: Pam at November 22, 2006 07:47 PM
Love the hair stories! Love the clothes! Who'd have thought then we'd be groaning and cringing at the way we looked? I can't wait for some of the 'recent' trend followers like the 'trucker hat wearers' to look back and cringe in shame and wonder what the heck ever possessed them, too.
And I was convinced that Simon LeBon, in town for a concert, would, you know, just spot me from his limo, sauntering down the street listening to my Walkman, rocking my pixie hair cut (complete with bangs gelled into spikes) wearing my black peter pan boots with my jeans (not acid wash, thank gawd) tucked into them and my union jack shirt with ridiculously wide white 'leather' belt over it, slung off to the side, and simply demand that I marry him on the spot and move to London, and, you know, I'd have definitely considered it.
Posted by: Kiki at November 22, 2006 07:55 PM
Happy Thanksgiving, Laurie! You have no idea how impressed I am that you have all of this recorded on film.
My daughter, aged 10, is already far better at this hair stuff than I will ever be. She too carries mysterious bottles of hair-care materiel with her everywhere. (I am sure this was why the TSA had to search her checked bag and make it miss her flight home last summer. "No one could possibly need that much hair gel," they were all saying to each other.) Please do not tell her about curling irons, butane or otherwise.
Posted by: Lucia at November 22, 2006 08:01 PM
OMG, I so loved the 80's (still do)! My hairstory claim to fame were those god-awful plastic banana clips. I had a horrible poodle perm and the clips piled it all along the back of my head! And, I had an Esprit SHIRT to go with the bag! Went great with my aqua-blue jelly shoes when I wasn't wearing my LA Gear high-tops w/slouchy socks. And I wore my Swatch on the INSIDE of my wrist...quite the trendsetter, I must say!
Thanks for the trip down memory lane. I'll have to post my senior pic on my blog...Wall O Bangs, blue eyeshadow (and I've got brown skin!), and off-the-shoulder sweater. Like, gag me!
Posted by: Jamie in So Cal at November 22, 2006 08:32 PM
You took me right back to high school with those hair photos. I was the rebel who had incredibly short hair. I also had the big ass silver hoops to go with the short hair. At one point in time, I had that flock of seagulls hair going on. OMG, what was I thinking?
If you still have your converse shoes, let me tell you, those bad boys are worth some serious bucks. They are the "in" thing right now and kids will pay anything for them.
I have my bugs bunny high top keds, I plan on keeping them as well. My high school niece thinks they are really cool. Well ya know, when ya got it, ya got it. hee hee.
Happy Thanksgiving to you and the kitties!
Laura
Posted by: Laura Neal at November 22, 2006 10:20 PM
That acid wash skirt photo was taken inside a Pizza Hut. I'd know the inside of a circa 1980-something Pizza Hut anywhere. :-)
Posted by: DebR at November 22, 2006 10:44 PM
I've been reading for years, but never commented...till now. Thank you, from the bottom of my swamp-raised heart for that trip down hair memory lane. I'll never forget the day my mother got me my first mullet. I cried in the middle of the J.C. Penney when we passed one of those mirrored columns--the hairdo, like my blue tweed coat, was horrid.
Posted by: Anita at November 22, 2006 11:10 PM
As a teenager in the 80s, I am far too familiar with many of these hairstyles. I was addicted to the perm, which made my already thick hair look like a lion's mane. Before that, when I still had short hair, I committed the worst of the hair sins: I had a rat tail. {GASP!}
Love the fashion show too. Jeans tucked into socks. Why hasn't that come back?
By the way, I was also in LOVE with Nick Rhodes (each of my girlfriends picked one of the members of Duran Duran to obsess over, mine was Nick; cuz wearing that much makeup doesn't mean you're gay). Anyway, I grew up in Iowa and Nick Rhodes married a girl from Des Moines (sadly, it didn't last). When I found out, I was devastated, because I was SO CLOSE. Hee!
I <3 the 80s.
Posted by: Betsy at November 22, 2006 11:34 PM
Oh man, I recognize the hair! I too am a child of the '80s and succombed to the wall of bangs. In my neck of the woods we had the jutting out around the ear hair side wall. Then the hair sticking straight up that gradually sloped down the other side. I have pitifully tried to draw a replica with keystrokes below. The "o" are for eyes and mouth.
__-_-
/ o o -
/ o -
/ \
Posted by: Twilight at November 23, 2006 12:47 AM
Damn, that keystrokes drawing didn't work at all. Oh well. All of us that lived through the '80s probably remember it well.
Posted by: Twilight at November 23, 2006 12:49 AM
brilliant - i love it. & i'm pretty sure i had the exact same esprit bag, even down to the colour... took me ages to save up for it, & i thought i was the coolest! :) xo
Posted by: tigerlilith at November 23, 2006 03:52 AM
My oh my - we must be near the same age (I graduated in 1990) - because I had that same head shaved on half my head look through grade 9 and 10... And then grew into the tall bangs - and I grew up near Vancouver, BC :)
Jo
Posted by: Jo at November 23, 2006 06:27 AM
Oh m'gosh! I still have the butane curling iron too! When our family went camping with no electricity, I thought I was pretty clever...
My best '80s hairdo was the faux-hawk, even the adults liked that one (when it wasn't tinted blue!) Sadly, Nick and the boys are just old now, isn't that awful?
Posted by: pinecone70 at November 23, 2006 06:37 AM
OMG I am DYING laughing...I owe my whole Freshman and Junior year population to Auquanet ROFLMAO!! I have been rushing to my computer daily to check this Southern storyline LOL It's great!! You are the bestm, thanks for making my day!! May you giggle just a little more, a little louder and a little longer each day!! Happy Southern Thanksgiving, an event that takes DAYS of preperation!
Posted by: Debbie at November 23, 2006 08:54 AM
I can tell we are the same age, because we went through the same hair progression at the same time. My biggest dare, however, was chopping off 13 inches of hair three weeks before gradution. I was rockin' the Wilson Phillips look.
Posted by: Erin at November 23, 2006 09:10 AM
Thanks for brightening my day and giving me a clue ...
Middle of Nowhere, Louisiana, eh?
Check appropriate town:
1. Bossier City
2. Haynesville
3. Cotton Valley
4. Dry Prong
5. Bunkie
6. Iota
7. Vidalia
8. Baker
9. Grosse Tete
10. Waterproof
11. Cut Off
12. Lecompte (Middle of Nowewhere, but home of Lea's Pies. Mmmmmmmm....)
Happy Thanksgiving ... I sure wish I could send you some of the Gumbo we will have later today!
Dez in Baton Rouge
Posted by: dez at November 23, 2006 09:20 AM
Serious flashback. We had many of the same hairstyles (that asymmetric bob thing...oh yeah!). We had family pics taken my sophmore year, and beforehand, I kept fluffing and spraying, and asking my sister, "Do you think it's big enough yet?" Every so often, usually if it involves getting ready to go out to a bar, I STILL get the urge to go big again. Is that odd? Or just the hick/redneck in me?
Posted by: Jocele at November 23, 2006 09:49 AM
Dez... try CARENCRO!!!! Carencro, Louisiana. Population ...17 or something, not including the fighting rooster farm.
Gotta love the South ;)
Posted by: laurie at November 23, 2006 10:29 AM
You so totally crack me up! How do you think of these things? Your forehead is not big!
Posted by: Marti at November 23, 2006 11:07 AM
Be glad that you had straight hair. I have really curly hair that I tried to straighten, tried being the key word. I not only wanted to marry Nick Rhodes, I also tried to look like him. I dyed my hair red and cut it in that sort of mullet hair he had. I copied his make up and bought clothes exactly like him. Lots of capezios and cowl neck shirts. I was so proud that I had the entire look of Nick's in the video of Please Tell Me Now- blue shirt, white tie, black pants and capezios. I thougt I was so cool and yet my parents probably wondered why I was dressing like a man! Good times!
Posted by: Tiffany Nourallah at November 23, 2006 04:54 PM
I'm just a little younger than you, and I committed nearly every hair crime you did, with worse results! You were the cool girl I was emulating. I, on the other hand, was ALSO guilty of test driving my MOTHER'S hairstyle when I was 8, so I have a picture of myself in a perfect 80's perm helmet, while I pose sarcastically, to make fun of a ---wait for it---- CLOWN tee shirt my awful grandmother gave me. Years of embarassing dance recital pictures have been traded mack to my mother just to get that one picture back! I mean, it's like, "Look at Bozo wearing a shirt with her own picture!"
Posted by: Kate at November 23, 2006 10:42 PM
My 9-year-daughter laughs hysterically at my high school grad photo dating from 1987. Not only was there a Wall o'Bangs (love that term!) but I had the mandatory poodle perm to go with it. I had so much styling crap in my frazzled-beyond-hope hair that I could lift one strand of hair in my Wall o'Bangs and the rest of the bangs would follow...and I was *proud* of that! Yargh...
BTW Sun-In is imported straight from hell. The stuff is evil, as I also discovered. What were we thinking!?
Thanks for the laughs!
Posted by: Mary Ann at November 24, 2006 10:28 AM
lol Great story, all three parts of it which are awesome. Clicking on the 'watch' link kind of bothered me though. My little sister broke countless watches of mine growing up. I would always let her use my watch and tell her 'now dont go pushing buttons! just leave the damned thing alone. She didnt kill them but when I got them back they would always be off by 6 hours and never EVER keep good time again. She would always swear up and down she didnt mess with it, but I never beleived her. My mom finally told me about this phenomenon and truth be told I didn't beleive HER either. I thought she was just taking up for lil sis. Grrrrrrrrrrr now this,,,,,now Aunt purl says it is true, I guess I owe someone an apology or 400. Wait a minute! Sis? Sis is that you? This is kind of a long way to go just to cover your arse you know? Think I have never heard of the "create a blog and post countless stories for months on end and then slip in the watch story to cover your tracks" strategy? Gotta get up Pretty early in the morning to slip one by BD you know.....well okay,,,,,by noon anyways. Great story
BD
Posted by: Briliantdonkey at November 24, 2006 08:42 PM
I think I did myself an injury gigglesnorting madly while looking at that Mohawk.
Posted by: Rabbitch at November 25, 2006 08:31 AM
:) CAP, I was reminded of my discovery of photos from back in the day.
In July of 2005 I had my 40th birthday and held a photo scavenger hunt. One of the things I distributed on a DVD with all the photos people submitted were some old photos I dug up of myself from that glorious decade known as the 80s, and some from the 70s too. (I'm old, give me a break!)
http://smallerdemon.livejournal.com/68324.html
Enjoy. :)
Posted by: smallerdemon at November 25, 2006 12:33 PM
oh girl- i had a WHITE GIRL 'FRO too, except i rocked it with BIG blue and white marbled glasses. i should dig out my high school year book to share the misery, but i'm going to laugh so hard i'll snort just thinking about it.
thanks for sharing yourself with us- good, bad, and fabulous.
Posted by: jenny at November 26, 2006 06:00 PM
We had IDENTICAL clothes (rockin' the class of '86 here)!!!
Note to self: Hide all photos circa 1982-1988. Or bury them.
Why are you not writing a book?! Awesome funny writer, you.
Posted by: Denelle at November 26, 2006 07:28 PM
Wow. Ok, I no longer feel quite so alone in my uber-geekness. Wow. SO glad to read there are so many others of us out there...
My bedroom was PLASTERED with Duran Duran posters.
My senior photo was the assymetrical bob..seriously. I now teach 8th graders who find it infinitely hilarious to find my pic on the wall of my high school and laugh at me. Just like 1987, baby!
Thanks for the memories!
Posted by: Susan B at November 28, 2006 08:27 PM
Oh my goodness just found your blog...
I had everything but the braces...
Blow drier and Aqua net hairspray...
But boy did we have some crazy 80's style...
thanks for making me laugh...
GA class of 87
anyone Hear "Billy Idol" just released a Christmas Album... Check out his... My Space still cute as a button
Posted by: tabbekitty at November 29, 2006 06:03 PM
Your Hairstory closely mimics my own although you seem to have escaped the Dorothy Hamil look. I should send the picture of me in my brownie uniform with the Dorothy Hamil look. My Mom thought it was so cute! You also skipped the part in high school where I chopped off my permed hair with big bangs to try and get rid of this annoying guy who would not leave me alone. Somehow I was convinced that if I cut my hair really short he'd lose interest. It didn't work and thankfully the hair grew back and was subjected to yet another perm.
Posted by: Beth at November 29, 2006 06:07 PM







