Hugs, Laurie. Cabernet goes with the pie if you want it to. Warm thoughts to your family, the two-legged ones and the four-legged ones.

Hang in there, sweetie. You'll make it through this. Love and best wishes to you, the family, and the fur children.

See? It's late here, and I thought I'd check in to see how your grandma is, and you're feeling lonely, and I'm alone, and I don't know where this is going, but we can do it together.

I love the internet.

In 'real' life you can never talk about beinbg lonely, or sad. People ask why I can write lonely so well, and I say, because we all are lonely. We just never have anyone to tell.

And I tell the innernets :)

All I can say is: Hug and pet the kitties. I find that is great therapy when I'm down and lonely. They listen and don't judge. When we're sad that means alot. Good luck to you, your kitties and your family.

sounds like Granny is doing better- we hope so. We have had a rough week or so with death and sickness- only thing I can think to say is, "they're dropping like flies," whatever that means, and it is certainly so disrespectful that I could never dare to utter it aloud. but damn, that is the first thing that pops in there. right, laugh it off so you don't cry. be the strong one. I am there, dear. and all us innernets folks are here for ya...
so when do the wine appreciation classes start? ;)

I was just checking in to see how your grandma's doing - and was so happy to see you posted...

Cheers to you for making Mr. Hakim less lonely!!! You know, it's funny, my dad has alzheimers and is in a facility and when I visit, I never know what to say, so I say nothing. I love that you just chattered away with a man who most people probably say nothing to because, like me they don't know what to say.

You're right about the lonely thing - it's just not something you can chat about in real life. I think that's why we all relate to you so well - you are writing what the rest of us are feeling, but think we are the only ones...thanks for puting voice to our thoughts and feelings.

You're one of a kind...yet you are one of us...

I meant putting voice, not puting voice!

Sadly I've spent an awful lot of time in hospitals the last few years and I, too, want to take care of everyone and make sure there's someone around to help. It's sad...the number of people who have no one to visit them.

Laurie, you are my absolute favorite blogger. You do a wonderful job conveying your feelings. Thank you for taking the time to share.

Norma

and we of the internets are here for you. Hugs.
Pie goes with everything.

Hi, just stopped in to see if there was news about your grandmother.

I do wish I could just come over and eat pie and drink cabernet with ya. It's been a long lonely Saturday here too. Did watch 3 movies though. And AFI's top 100 most inspiring movie list. My favorite, It's a Wonderful Life was number 1!

I'm glad you got your grandmother settled, although I know it's hard to see them ill. I'm sure your mom was glad you were there with the both of them.

And I'm sorry about Roy. He's a lucky cat to have you to love him.

We're here for ya, Laurie. Hang in there.

I want some pie...mmmmm chocolate cream pie...and alas I have none!!

Curse you pie talkers!!

Do you know what a rock star you are? Trekking all that distance to take care of a family member, spending time with other folk who need some attention, taking such good care of your cats, listening to others and giving your dad a chance to exercise his fatherly skills...super amazing human, that's you.

I love pie, too.

Is there anything ya'll can think of that I can bring to the hospital next Friday? A lot of the residents are stroke victims and have limited motor skills. I want to bring something, some sort of activity or ... god I have no idea, just something. Can ya'll think of anything? Nothing that takes too much motor skill.

And my granda is doing real good, thank ya'll :) I told her about all the emazing kind notes, she was FLOORED!!!

oh geez look at my typing, wine much?

Advice of the day: A hard Mike's is Good to Find - and it goes with just about everything. Key Lime Pie ... mmmmmmm

Oh sweetie, sending you a big ole hug southern style. Sorry about your Grandmother and Roy not doing so good while you were away. You know there is no way around it but sometimes life really sucks and I'm sorry the old sucko's have hit your life and especially your grandmother's life. Chin up and be nice to yourself.

Don't should yourself, sweetie. Plenty of people are alone on Saturday nights. I am. It's OK. Nobody's judging so don't beat yourself up for it either. How's your kittie? Can you give him fluids?

Hi - sorry about your grandmother...
Music usually is appreciated to drown out the hustle and bustle inside a hospital. Something soft. Music therapy is a proven effective technique if the hospital will allow it. Otherwise, just keep talking to people and encourage them to reply to you, especially those with no visitors. Take care.

I wish the world had more kind people like you out there. You must have brought such happiness to those poor people without visitors.

I completely understand the pie urge. I'm dealing with Lonely + need to diet so as to pass the police medical exam. Hell of a dilemma.

Know that we'd all hang out with you in a second if, you know, we were in L.A., and you didn't mind hanging out with crazy blog readers. ;)

Lots of hugs, and more thoughts for your grandmothers.

Hi sweetheart.I love you. Mr. Hakim and Mr Bill both waved hello to you on the phone today. All you need to bring when you visit is your smile and your heart.

I just spent my Saturday night at my parents' house. After making jam all morning with my mom, I didn't want to leave because they're watching my four-legged baby until my broken ankle heals and after 5 weeks I miss him so bad I get all sad whenever anyone mentions it.

But then I see my 83 yo dad loving having something that needs him and loves on him back - could be the cookies - and I think maybe I should leave my dog with my parents because they need his love more, ya know? But I just moved back to this big ole city and I need furball love too, but my dad takes my 16 yo dog out like 6 times a day so maybe he's happier there too. *Sigh* I think I need pie.

How's about taking some pictures of the kitties? You might get some of the residents to tell you stories about THEIR favorite critters, which is good for both of you; favorite remembrance for patient, cool critter story for you.

And I agree, just chatting about any old thing is such a balm for so many starved ears. I'm a medical person, and I know that coming to see the doctor is the highlight of the day for lots of our patients.

And truly, your Aunt Pam knows whereof she types. Seeing your wonderful smile and hearing you be you will be a huge treat for any of the folks in that facility, residents and staff alike.

Be well. Don't make the cookies feel jealous of all the attention the pie got, you hear?

PS-try to find "Hey Mambo"--a nice red I just had at dinner tonight. Would suit a berry pie quite nicely, methinks!

Oh Laurie. . .you're such a sweetheart and I wish I knew you in person! Everyone loves you so much because you put into words what all of us are feeling but don't know how to say. Bless your heart!

Have you seen the picture of my grandfather (my Daddo) that I posted in a blog post a few weeks ago? This is a story about him and while it won't help with the loneliness (sorry) I think it will make you laugh. It always makes us laugh...

My Daddo had to go into a nursing home a couple of years before he died. He was a salt of the earth, good and dear man. He was a devout Southern Baptist, born in the mountains of Western North Carolina and lived there all of his 90+ years. Before he went into the nursing home, he was in the hospital and had to have a catheter put in. When my brother came back into the room after the nurse had put it in, my brother said, "Well, Daddo, did she take good care of you?"

My grandfather started laughing and said, "Son, she just pulled up that blanket and grabbed my pecker like it was her own. If she'd have stayed down there much longer, I'd've thought she was jacking me off."

You would have loved him. We all fell in love with his fellow residence at the nursing home, too. I know how it goes.

So glad to hear your grandmother is out of the acute-care hospital & in rehab (not THAT kind of rehab, for crying out loud!). kt & your Aunt Pam are right on the money, someone who talks to them as real people and not patients is the best thing you can bring. And at least you're home, despite the lousy trip.
I have been known to devour an entire Boston Cream pie. By myself. I know whereof you speak. Glad to hear things are settling down a bit...Hang in there, we're rooting for you!

ps- if you need some comic relief google Manolo the shoeblogger. Hysterical!

Nearly every time you post, something you write touches me deeply, and leaves me comtemplatively speechless.
You're an amazing person, with a depth of kindness and beauty rarely found.
One of my favorite quotes (greatly paraphrased by now, I'm afraid): Hearts are like stone; it takes much grinding and painful work to transform them into bowls large enough to hold all the love.

You made Mr. Hakim's day a little bit less lonely. They say you get what you give. Maybe when you least expect it. Sweet dreams.

Oh, I hear that lonely-Saturday-night-blues song! After my husband died last year, I realized that the lowest part of my week was Sat. night, cause that was "our" night--even if all we did was stay home. So I got a job that lets me work from 5-10 pm on Saturdays. It helps a little. As far as the hospital is concerned, you might call during the week and talk to their person in charge of activities for ideas of what you could bring or do. Maybe something seasonal--they may decorate for fall, or halloween, as it tends to help the residents stay oriented in the "now."

I sat here most of the night, a melancholy baby. No wine, just beading to keep my hands busy. Tears from the effects of a full moon I think. I wondered how things went at Grandma's and there you were...stunning me with thoughts beautiful and universal. I wish that next to me was a warm understanding human, and the longing for that overwhelms sometimes. If I had it once, I can probably have it again. And so will you. Roy is your soul-cat, don'tchaknow? There is something people=like in his gaze. You are ok, laurie.

Hug. Hope Roy is doing ok.

Probably not practical, but if it was, I'd say take a cat. I used to do pet therapy at a nursing home, and everyone loved the kitty, even the ones who were afraid to pet it lest they get scratched. The other thing my grandma always appreciated when she was in nursing care was real home-made food. Hospital food is so bland and impersonal. I'd say taking a plate of some soul food munchies would be a nice gesture.

Laurie, bless your whole damn soul. You are the epitome of southern graciousness. I love you like a fat kind loves cake!

Especially for loving and listening to Mr. ... (sorry too much vokie tonight), the one who couldn't talk but hugged you with his one arm.

My beloved daddy suffered a massive stroke about 7 years ago...he can't talk (but for certain words) and he only has physical use of his left side....but his brain still works...and so many people treat him like he's deaf and dumb...and so totally misses the INTELLEGENT man whos trapped in that handicapped body...so, bless your ever loving heart to talk to MR. because most people side step or ignore him because thay just don't know what to say. So he suffers from human interaction. I love you for thaat alone.

Samantha in the valley

Ok, that was supposed to be "like a fat KID loves cake

What's that song, "Saturday Night Is The Loneliest Night Of The Week..."

Your talk of the nursing home made me think of "Fried Green Tomatoes."

Laurie I agree with mrspao--if one of your kitties is sociable the folks at the convalescence center would probably love to cuddle a warm, furry body.

I love the honesty of your posts. Hope your grandmother continues to improve.

Laurie, I can't read another day without leaving a comment. My whole *second life* started nearly 20 years ago because I gave a couple of dear, but quite lonely ladies in a nursing home a manicure while I was there to visit someone else. This simple thing lead to a windy road of going back to college at 31, meeting the second and real love of my life, changing careers, getting married again at 38 and moving to the backwoods of appalachia where we now have 10 cats. I am confident that you will have the loving, connected and secure relationship you envision. You're creating it right now, as we speak, as we eat pie!

Lourie, glad to hear that your grandmother is better. We missed you at the Farmers Market! Hang in there honey this too will pass.

My mom was in a nursing home for two years before she died so I know the scene you were describing so well.

Take care,

I started working for Hospice about 5 weeks ago - a lot of my patients are in nursing homes and I have been feeling sort of extra-crispy lonely, you know? I wonder if our need to make sure that people (and cat-people) are taken care of as they decline is sort of a "pay it forward" thing. Seeing the last chapter or two of someone's life reminds you that every experience that matters, no matter how much family you have around you, happens to you alone.
A few nights ago after work, everyone in the house was asleep (including the cat) and I ate a whole Sara Lee Cheesecake with a nice Australian red.

Honey, you're not alone. I wish I could give you a great big hug and a good bottle of Australian Pinot Noir. You've had a rough rough time of it, and I think it is so very sweet and so very typical of you that you've gone through all of this and brought some joy into other people's lives.

Oh Laurie, you took the very best gift to Mr. Hakim..your own fine self. As a home health nurse, I spent a lot of time talking to elderly folks. And besides the fact that they liked telling THEIR story, they also wanted to hear pieces of mine. As one lady told me.."you take me out of here and into your world. I can listen to you and tell you what you need to do (and she did)and you listen". And these weren't in depth stories..more like should I get snow tires or new shoes. btw, she voted for shoes, they are more fun.

With folks having to work so hard; raise kids etc, even the residents with caring families can't possibly have all the family contact they'd like. So there you were. Ms Laurie with the caring heart.

My heart goes out to you, and your family...and that includes the fur babies. I know how devastatin it is to have one of those soulmates be ill. (((Laurie)))

Laurie...you are a gem! Glad to hear you sat and talked to the man in the hospital. I know we feel lonely sometimes but we somehow make it through but that man and many others there really know what lonely is...when you visit your Grandma next, talk more and bring one of your babies for them to cuddle or touch. It does make a difference even if they don't show it. Prayers for your Grandma for a speedy recovery.

{{{Laurie}}}

Wow...that's pretty much how I felt last night. My husband moved out yesterday afternoon and trying to explain that to a 3 year old makes for a sad day.

Thanks so much for sharing so much of your life. I spent Saturday night feeling sad and lonely, but this morning after reading your post it just made me feel a little better.

I remember when my great-grandma was moved to a new home when I was a teenager. The woman in the first bed of her room was a 90 year old that acted as if she were 4. Doris was so sweet. She never had family that visited, so we kind of adopted her. My Aunts were always bringing her little toys and baby dolls and she would light up like a child on Christmas morning. She passed away soon after my Gram did, but I'll always remember her.

Hang in there Laurie...you are too sweet and kind to feel this way--your time is coming--I PROMISE!!
I hate nursing homes...it always makes me feel just the way you describe--sad!
Hang on...we're all here for you!

CAP I just had to comment on your last post. Your blog touches and enriches my life so much.
Having spent the last year with my Dad (95 yrs old) in and out of a nursing home, I, too, have the feeling that I have "adopted" his many friends there. Now Dad is living with my brother, but each week we go back to visit the friends he made while rehabbing. They would love kitty pictures, garden photos, and the stories of your life are the best medicine. Those who can speak, love to answer questions about their lives....careers, where they grew up, etc. They are often visited by dogs, cats and various baby farm animals and have such fun....my father, a former poultry farmer, loved the day they brought a hen and a rooster. There is a bulletin board in the NH showing various residents holding the animals. Sweet diversion for them.
They also do love music. I have given simple beaded gifts to certain women there and also brought a single flower. NH's are not the brightest places, in most cases.
I, too am alone( well, not really, as I have a beloved cat), much older than you, but there is a form of comfort that settles in, and pie, knitting and beading do help on occasion, I agree, alas, I am no longer able to tolerate wine. Recently I had a 2nd date! Wow, and there may be another. You never know where this mysterious journey will lead but be ready while savoring every moent you are in. Meanwhile, you are making the most and touching lives in an immeasurable way. What more could life be?? You are wonderful!

Wow, Laurie. You are an amazing woman. Jigsaw puzzles are a good thing to take, and how about some yarn and knitting needles? Even if they can no longer knit, they could give you some tips. Have a happy Sunday and take a nap with sweet Roy.

You are stronger than you think. So many people wouldn't go where you've gone because of how depressed THEY would get. That's why so many of our elderly don't have visitors. You've done a wonderful thing. When you wake up today, have another slice of pie for me. Was it Cheesecake Factory Key Lime? If it was, have two!!

I'm saying prayers for your Grandma and you.

Hang in there, Sweetie.

*HUGS HUGS HUGS*

i've eaten a whole pie once, too. and i blame the loneliness for that.

i've worked at 2 different nursing homes (but not as a nurse, more of a receptionist). you could bring anything that comes from the real world and they'd love to see it. i shared a pizza with a resident once (because i'm an adopter, too) and he thought that was the grandest thing in the world. he told everyone. i bet they'd like to see your travel pictures or your baby pictures. really, anything that doesn't look like 'hospital'

Slow down on the cabernet...A good cup of tea should do the trick and it's warmer and comfier. Try leaf teas, it takes a bit longer to prepare and clears the mind just looking at it! And if you want to cheer up treat yourself to the best tea. I find mine from http://www.leafshop.co.uk , it makes my day!

Honey, I seriously know right where you are. We had to put my grandfather in a nursing home a few years ago because he had some strokes. He went from a full of life gambling politician to someone who constantly makes strange ticking motions with his arms and says strange stuff.
We kinda adopted other people at the home who had no one. It's really hard on you and on your time. But it can also be quite rewarding at the same time.
My little boy knows most of the nursing home people by name and it's nice to see them light up when he comes in. They need something like that you know, and maybe circumstances are that which they are so that we can provide some stimulation for them.
Did I seriously ramble for this long? Sorry! By the way, Shoney's Strawberry Pie...to die for.

On behalf of Mr. Hakim and all the other lonely people who no one comes to visit, thank you for talking to us even about the lonely feelings. It's why we love you.

Oh Laurie, you are such a good kind soul. You made Mr. Hakim a little less lonely and I think that really, that's all any of us can do.

Laurie, if you believe in karma you have a wonderful, happy, fulfilling life coming to you. No one can have a giving, fun, cheerful soul like you do and not be rewarded for all the good things you do - whether it's for what you give Mr. Hakim and your grandmother, or for what you give all of us here. You deserve goodness to come your way soon.

Is it possible to send a yummy apple crunch pie through the mail? No, probably not. But if I could I would make you one, and serve it with wine. (Yes! Another reason to visit Boston!) And ginger ice cream.

I hope everybody feels better. For the nursing-home people, maybe some books on tape?

As someone who spends most every Saturday night alone, I hear ya. Really and truly.

As far as what to bring to the nursing home, may I suggest your most sociable feline?

Key Lime Pie! Even in your lonely nights, you do it up Southern style. Next time, try it more California-style -- In-N-Out Burgers at 10PM. But let's hope you don't have any more lonely nights.

And, while it's a poor substitute for a real live guy, there's always blogging until you find Mr. Right. One of us can always give you a virtual hug (or a squeeze of the tush).

You make me cry as often as you make me laugh. You're a dear sweet little thing, Laurie!

Photos of the cats - especially with those wonderful captions you put on them, might really help. You could even print out some of your blog entries about them and just read them to the patients. I'm sure it would stir up memories and stories from them. Let's face it, we all have a soft spot for the furbabies.

I know about wanting to eat a whole pie (or box of cookies, etc). And I think a nice cabernet is the perfect match sometimes :)

hugs to you and Roy from me and Perry Penelope

Oh, Laurie! Much love from the North!

Your writing is, as always superb. And you are such a cool, kind person. Really.

My favorite quote, though, was the "light" one about loving crazy until it loves you back. I am definitely going to write something around that, if it is ok with you. See me in a week, and hopefully I will have an in-depth discussion going on...

Aw, Laurie. I am so sorry for your lonely nights. I have them too, in a slightly different way, and I so wish I could give back to you in the same open, honest, down-and-dirty and hilarious way you give to all of us. You lighten my load and I wish I could lighten yours.

I just keep telling myself that things get easier and it's all part of living. Which it is. I really believe it, even in the face of the long crying and house wandering nights.

Isn't the blogosphere like a weird miraculous thing? Who would have ever thought that we would be connected to one another all over the world, going through the same kinds of things, giving aid and comfort in the ether this way? Like a floating, ephemerous support group. With yarn.

Thank God for the yarn.

I know! I ate a whole pie last weekend. Its what you do when your alone. You just start feeling so lonely.

The dude? The one who made "all of a sudden" plans to go out on a Saturday night? Get rid of him. You shouldn't have to say "please sit on the sofa with me," after coming home from the very emotional task of seeing to your sick grandmother's needs. A guy worth anything would've known that you needed some lovin' without you having to ask.

I'm so glad that your grandmother seems to be doing well. Hopefully, she will be back to her old self soon.

This has been a bad summer for my family, too. Last month we lost both of my husband's parents. It was unexpected and left us rather in shock.

Never think that you're doing too much for your furry friends to be normal, they are family and we need them. In the last four years I've lost both my horses, five of my cats and two of my dogs. We did everything we could for them but lost the fight, in time, anyway. My remaining cat is healthy, thank goodness, but in his teens. My dog is thirteen and a half, has an inoperable brain tumor and degenerative myelopathy which has made him unable to walk with his back legs without support. We took him to Sherman Oaks (a 3 hour drive each way) for radiation therapy (3 times a week for 5 weeks) which has given him three and a half extra years so far, he still has the tumor but it's growing back very slowly. And we had a wheelchair custom built for him that puts his back end on wheels and allows him to walk and run. He's in no pain and is happy and active but I know that the time is coming when we'll have to say good-bye. I hope not for a good while. I've learned 3 things - in life, sh** happens; never have all of your furry friends get old at the same time; and love them as much as you can every day that you have together.

T -- I agree about the guy thing.

100%

In fact, I was thinking to myself as I poured coffee at 7-11 this morning: Should I tell him I don't want to see him anymore or should I just never return any of his calls? He'd stop trying after a day or two anyway.

He's not the right guy for me. The right guy would have never picked a club over couch time.

Thank ya'll for all the kindness :)

Yum! PIE!!! I don't drink wine, but as for pie - now you're talkin'!

I'm alone too, but with no chance of dates at age 48. No men in sight, no men on the horizon. Abandoned two years ago by my husband of over 20 years. Rejection. Deep loneliness. I cried every day, I lost 30 pounds. I uncovered such egregious behavior, it is hard to believe one man could do these things to a devoted wife and children. My teenage sons are the only reason I could keep going after discovering all the years of lies and betrayals by the personality-disordered Mr. Conman. (And conman was the term given to him by our marriage counselor.)

Saturday night my son and I finished up the CHOCOLATE MERINGUE pie. The older son is in college, we try not to tell him about our pie eating - don't want him homesick!

Last month we were eating BLUEBERRY pie.

The month before that it was KEY LIME pie.

Now it's apple season, so it's time to make APPLE pie! I'm trying to be good - don't want to gain back all the weight - it's one of the few things that make me feel better about myself.

Love your blog. Been reading for at least a year. So many quality women and so few quality men - depressing, isn't it?

Time for more pie! And maybe a perusal through the Zappos pages...

You made me cry, but in a way it's the good kind of crying where you realize you are not the only person in the universe who has felt this way. Hugs to you and your cat and your grandma and everyone.

Maybe you could bring them a small animal. I don't know if you could do that at the hospital though. OR candy? Maybe some flowers? You can get cheap ones at Kroger or your other local grocer. Everyone likes flowers.

I wish I had spent Saturday night in with a pie and bottle of Cabernet. Believe me when I say that "alone" is sometimes for the better.

Hugs to all your family two footed and four footed and of course to yourself - you sound like you need one :-)

Aw, Laurie. I am so sorry for your lonely nights. I have them too, in a slightly different way, and I so wish I could give back to you in the same open, honest, down-and-dirty and hilarious way you give to all of us. You lighten my load and I wish I could lighten yours.

I just keep telling myself that things get easier and it's all part of living. Which it is. I really believe it, even in the face of the long crying and house wandering nights.

Isn't the blogosphere like a weird miraculous thing? Who would have ever thought that we would be connected to one another all over the world, going through the same kinds of things, giving aid and comfort in the ether this way? Like a floating, ephemerous support group. With yarn.

Thank God for the yarn.

oops! :lol

We're all lonely at some time or another, especially when life has hit us with something (s) we weren't expecting right now. You speak for so many people when you have the courage to write what you write.
Much love to you and to Roy.

You're not a crazy cat lady. You are taking proper care of your beloved pet.

And gosh, I wish I could send you a "Lea's Pies" blueberry pie from LeCompte, LA.

i ate a whole trader joe's strudel last night, under the guise of something sweet for the wee one's bedtime snack. was she already asleep and i ate the whole thing? yep.

i'm sorry about all the stuff with your grandma, but she's lucky to have her family around her making sure everything is ok.

Bless your huge, soft heart, Laurie! You made me cry, in a very good way. Many hugs from a fellow crazy cat-lady...

Oh dear girl. I have had a week this week. Every night I came home and asked hubby if he could just fold me up and carry me in his pocket for a while so I wouldn't have to deal. Right now, reading your post, I so want to do that for you. I wish I could just hide you and your kitties in my pocket for a while so none of you had to be sick, sad or lonely. Oh, if life were only that easy.

I'm sorry for your grandmother's illness. I know how hard it is to be away from family when someone gets sick.

Have you tired one of those fountains to lure your kitty into more drinking? When one of mine got old and wouldn't drink enough, he loved the fountain and would drink the running water. I think they even make them specifically for pets now.

I tell people I'm lonely sometimes. It makes them uncomfortable but I can't always put on a brave front and they need to be reminded that not everyone has someone to come home to.

I was out today and went to a restaurant for lunch by myself, as usual. I was feeling sorry for myself then I saw the look on the guys face who was having lunch with his wife, little two kids and her mom. He looked like he wished he was eating alone.

Best wishes to grandma an Roy.

Well, after reading your super sunny post about how lovely today's weather was (it's lovely here in Marin County, CA too), and then reading this very open post - I decided that the heavens decided to shine on you today and give you a really good day, since you'd taken such good care of grandma, Roy, and yourself! You're an awesome person, and I'm glad Grandma is doing well. And, you know? There are dates that I've been on, and men I've had over to the house to make the lonely go away that have made me wish that I was alone on a Saturday night. I'll take kitty/doggy love any day over a mediocre man. I've even been on a date listening to a man talk, thinking, "I wish I was at home knitting. Or contemplating my navel. Or staring at the wall. With a purring cat on my lap." So, cherish your alone time, you've got a wonderful family and friends who love you. And, when they're not around, you have a whole passel of wacky blogstalkers who will make you feel loved. XO

Hey Laurie,

What about bringing some coffee table books from the library? I volunteered at a senior day centre and they loved to just look through the books (any topics are fun!) They also LOVED singing songs from the war times...You are my sunshine, 5 foot 2... any way you could find a CD/tape to bring?

If not, just bringing yourself is perfect, you definitely have a knack for telling stories and bringing out all kinds of emotions in people.

I don't like the Horoscope anyway - your other writing is much better.

You made me wispy. And as a speech therapist who works in a convalescent hospital...PLEASE talk to every resident there! I am sure the lovely Mr. Hakim understood every word you said. I too have adopted every resident, whether I work with them or not. Just a kind word from a wonderful gal like you can make their day!!

You are just too sweet making all the other people in rehab feel wanted by someone. Maybe it takes loneliness to really sense loneliness and to want to do something about it in others. Consider that they have been blessed by the loneliness that you feel, and allow that to make you happy at least for a moment.

And, no, convalescent hospitals are no fun at all. Sounds like your grandmother's at least got reasonable neighbors, though. My great aunt had a psycho lady next to her when she had a bout with pneumonia. She was constantly screaming and begging for "help" to get out of her bed. She'd rip off her electrode things and strip herself bare from the waist up in an attempt to do it herself. It was very sad to watch, and I felt helpless to do anything for her.

Thinking of you and your family... hope she improves enough to come home soon.

I've not been reading your blog long, but I can say I don't think you are a 'crazy cat lady'. The way people care about their animals says a lot about them, as does your visit to the nursing home.
My hubby came from a ten year marriage (his ex and yours sound like a pair) and brought with him a 13yo cat. In the 5 years we've been together that cat has developed lots of health problems, but as he is my furball too now...I can't imagine not doing everything it takes to keep him around. He is the only thing that kept hubby sane after the divorce. The only thing that chose to love him. Our old guy is a miracle kitty (working on life 7 of 9) and it takes a lot to keep him going.
So I think you are great...if nothing else then for caring for your cat so much. Hope that helps your day!!

You have just become a hero to that man in the hospital. Good for you! I'm sorry to hear abt Roy. But I'm glad to hear that Grandma is doing better.

And I TOTALLY understand the need to eat an entire pie. Xanax can't do what sugar and butter can.

a whole pie and wine is cheaper then therapy, and tastes better too.

lots of healing thoughts to g-ma and to precious Roy. i hope both of them pull through.

and a fun but low motor skill game may be like checkers or connect four. i bet those would be fun.

and my kitty, mama beans, sends lots of kitty energy to roy. she doesnt need it.

Laurie, keep on keepin' on. You amaze me all the time with your insight and wise, wise ways. I am glad that Roy has someone like you to be with everyday. Dump the guy that chose the club. There is someone out there when YOU are ready.

I wish I lived near you so that I could tell you to come over and just run your mouth as long as you wanted. Oh wait, you don't know me? Ah hell, it's a southern thing, we always know everyone! I think wine goes wonderful with key lime pie. And just for an fyi..champagne goes well with frito pie, don't ask. And you know, your never alone...we are always there.

Oh, you've had a rough go of it. I'm sorry to hear about your grandma. Sounds like you have a very close family who will surround her with love and support. And you no doubt made Mr.Hakim's day. You're a kind, generous person, CAP.

Laurie,
RE: activities, never underestimate the power of Bingo. Especially if you can come across and/or make extra-large laminated cards and wipe-off liquid markers. The marker containers are easier to weild than little chips, and the large squares make a bigger target. Add to this the fact that many older people begin playing pre-stroke, then have to get help afterward. My grandma stopped liking bingo once someone had to help her with her "fun time," and I always think now that if someone had just made BIG HONKING CARDS that shou could see and mark, she might have had an easier time of her last few years.

Similarly, joke playing cards that are huge might work; paintbrushes with tubes of therapeutic foam around the handles and some pretty clay pots for decorating (then you can fill them with dirt and help plant seeds -- giving somethign to care for can be an exceptional gift for someone who feels they have lost their independence). For those who once crocheted, q-hooks and huge yarn for shawls/scarves/etc for the homeless (larger knitting needles might also work, but from what I've experienced crochet is easier to re-learn first, as there's just the one implement to wrangle).

I am so sorry the kitty is feeling poorly, and so glad he's got you. You must have a heart bigger than Alaska. I hope these suggestions help.

Bless you and yours. I hope Mr. Roy will get better.

Love and hugs!

I'm glad your Grandma is doing better. Funny thing about talking about lonely, I never speak of it because I don't want the other person to feel bad. I don’t want them to feel like they are not giving me enough attention. When that's not even the case. So I just keep it to myself. Is that odd?

late post but this was such a good one! I luuuurve me some Crazy Aunt Purl and check every day. Just spent a day with my mom sorting out my grandmothers art clippings into albums. Difficult when you feel so proud of a loved one's accomplishments yet so sad that they are gone. I wish I could visit her somewhere. Kiss your grandma and your kitties for me!

I'm a little late to this party but as an experienced rehab hospital Activity Director and Admissions person of oh..say 27 years.YOU ROCK!! Keep talkin' and smilin'. Also if that center will allow it..TAKE em some PIE!! and wine too. We have Happy Hour with all the good stuff. Today we had a HOT homemade yeast roll party with homemade jams, real butter and honey. and Cheese biscuits like from the Red Lobster. We have a cooking club that makes and then eats pies and a Red Hat Ladies Club that likes to get a little slight bit wild. We have a Men's Club that goes to Hooters and ball games. Next up is Horse Racing. I am sure that there are many ways that you can get involved. Also a cat would be loved.We have 2 golden retrievers that come everyday and a pair of Cockatiels. But just to spend time talking and sharing...that is priceless.

I always enjoy your blog and thank you for your insight. You are really never alone. There is always someone here for you on the Internets. Heck I have been married for 25 years today. He won't remember. and that is ok. Sorry for the book.

Thank you for this post. I needed to read it today. If only eating the whole pie would fix things....

{{{{{{Laurie}}}}}}

Hon, you are simply precious! Someone as kind and giving as you will never be alone.

{{{{{{Roy}}}}}}

We're giving IV fluids to one of our kitties as well...at least we're not having to syringe feed him anymore. People think that we're nuts to spend so much $ and effort on a CAT...but they just don't get it. We depend on them almost more than they depend on us.

Dude, EVERYTHING goes with Key Lime Pie. Also, EVERYTHING goes with {insert favorite alcohol here}. Takes a special person to do that hospital thing. I tried it. I am Not Special Enough.
Cats rock best because boys don't purr. (LOL, I typed "boys don't purl". There's something wrong with me.)

When my mom was in ICU we were there so much we got to know the other families. It was its own microcosm and as much as I knew I of course should be there with my mom i sure as heck missed my normal life (which I suddenly had pretty good perspective).

Please go read my pie post. My little guy was adamant during TS Ernesto that he had to have pie. It solves a lot of problems. http://krazykatknits.blogspot.com/2006/09/of-hurricanes-and-lemon-pie.html

Hey Laurie, I know it's been a few days (had some catching up to do) but I want you to know that I'm thinking of you and your granny, too. Hope things get better real soon. I sympathize, my granny's in a nursing home now because of a stroke she had in March. We're still hoping she makes it home. God knows she wants to.

Best of health all around. Grannies and cats especially.

I'm praying for your granny, your kitty & you, Laurie. You have such a good heart that I'm certain you won't be alone much longer!