Am I the first?

happy birthday other leo's as well... let's celebrate all month taking that nap! that's my plan :)

thanks laurie! love the post!

Well I'm a Cap due to have a baby at the end of this month, so if I'm feeling calm then I'll be very well pleased indeed. No promises on the assaults in the meantime, though--I'm heavily pregnant and it's rather hot, so folks will just have to tread lightly.

I am! I am!

That was my big scorpio accomplishment for the day.

Now, I have a question: since you are the queen of knitting instructions (really, no one explains things so clearly as you do), any chance I could convince you to describe a provisional cast-on? The thing where you cast on to a piece of scrap yarn, so that after knitting in one direction, you can start over again and knit in the other? Any hope?

oh no, you got mine totally right (pisces)...i've got TWO art/craft shows in the next few weeks so I've got art projects everywhere! all over the house and its driving the cats nutty!

How rude that my planetary account gets vacation and I don't this month. Good thing there's Blue Moon beer & BBQ on weekends.

[BTW, ate some wonderful fried green tomatoes and fried okra over the weekend. My fav farmer market gal was there with the promised produce, my cast iron skillet was ready, and I had a fresh box of cornmeal to crack open. mmmmmmm...]

Kathleen, I will definitely try to do that, with pictures. Of course, I will have to learn to do it myself first LOL.

Hey....if you need a vacation my family and i are ging to send a week in the Shenandoah Valley and there's extra room in the condo. Oh, and don't mind spending a week with a boring ol' stay at home mom and her family.

Cool breezes from the Blue Ridge Mountains................!

Oh freaky. You're right on the $$ with my Taurus hor-o-scope. We just sold a house and got some big $$ from the sale! yea! My bank account is ripe. But, now the bills from the new house renos are coming in... and I'm feeling MIGHTY poor.

Well, hopefully the hinted at promotion will kick in soon and I'll get that $$ relief in September. Not to count chickens before they're hatched, or anything.

...and that would be "my planetary accountant gets a vacation..." this heat is beyond rude out here and I need a beer pronto.

Going, not "ging". My keyboard troll is misbehaving again.

Yikes!!!! I'm an Aries, and now I'm plenty worried about what my X has in store for me. (I've got no other backstabbers in my life, I think.)

I'm lying low this month.

I'm a Leo and I'm way overdue for a good long nap. Work has been kicking my butt lately and I am tired! Unfortunately, I have to keep going fast and strong until at least August 22nd when our second trial starts here at the oh-so-lovely law firm I work for. After that I feel a vacation week coming on.

A message to all Cancers: If you do decide to sue Astrology, this Virgo wants in! It's exhausting getting all the crap all the time. Too much worry!

I've been waxing nostaglic all July long! Now August too? What does that mean??? Am I in need of medication?? I thought the umpteen bottles of wine stacked up in the corner was enough....

By the way Laurie, how in the world do you come up with this stuff every month? Absolutely hysterical!

Holy crap, holy crap, holy crap, Scorpio is right on! I AM exhausted and I DO need a break! So much so that I got a little teary at the thought of someone finally understanding that the end has to be near. *SAD!*

Thanks Crazy Aunt Purl *sniffle sniffle*

Bevvy: ancient redneck secret!

Gemini baby!

Scary, it's so completely right.

I'm a Sag and IT'S TRUE, I do the sniffly nostalgic thing at the end of every summer. I always feel like I let it slip away and wasted it, even though I'm outside every night hauling the dog around through the park.

You should come here, and then we could make fried okra, which seems like a good idea right now, even though I have never actually seen okra anywhere.

Your Virgo predictions are always spot-on — and hilarious. I was hoping for something a little more career-oriented (I really need to find a job post-graduation) but relationships are always good, too!

(Where did my comment go? I hit some phantom button on my keyboard that took me back a web-window...)

Where were you yesterday? I could have used that Aries' backstabbing advice this morning. Actually it was just a back-prick -- no, not that kind -- an annoyance by a former friend but I did not respond! Because I've been there and done that and now I'm moooving on!

I will argue though that I can hold a grudge like it was an Olympic sport.

Laurie - I can't tell you how much I needed this horrorscope. I needed it bad, the Angst of August has set in and I have no vacation time left.

Gee, it is in my Leo nature to nap. How cool is that? Very affirming, thanks! Oh, and I have mailed a package for you that may be interesting, especially in regard to your opening comments!

Yes! I am such a Cap and totally obsessed about all those things this week... and I'm doing the salute to American Artist Appreciation Month over at my blog, which will have me being very crafty, and therefore, very calm by the end of the month. WooHoo! I love your horoscopes.

Hmmmm. Very interesting. I was reading the August horoscope in Vanity Fair yesterday. I think I'm going with that one. It said something about Cancers partying for the month. Of course, there was also a warning about possibly going poor in the process. Eh. I'll worry about that tomorrow.

I love to travel too (just got back from Iceland -I remember you went there with the x). Are you familiar with kayak.com? No more searching multiple airlines to get the best deal and they have super-cool search tools to filter out things like 3-stop flights. No, I'm not affiliated with them in any way. But the really cool tool they have is that you can see where you can go for a certain amount of money. When I read that you were looking for "Cheap Flight To Anywhere" I thought you might benefit from it. If anything it's fun to see where you could go. To get to the tool, go to http://www.kayak.com/h/buzz and enter the info at the top of the page.

By the way, love the 'scopes. I'm a Virgo.

You scare me sometimes. As for Aries - it's the fire sign thing - we burn hot, and fast and then we move on. If we haven't killed in the first frenzy, we forget about it.

But I'll make a note to be cautious.

Haa. Aries. Cautious. That's funny.

Okay, I'll take it easy with the drinking and fast cars (yeah, not an issue, booze is *not* on the diet and I drive a "mom mobile"), but d'ya think next month my "buckwild crazy" could apply to the romance department? Pretty please?

Liza {who notes this month the "anywhere but here" impulses have lead to being out shopping spendin $$ on stuff that's not needed. Well except for all the yarn~that's *totally* needed}

Laurie:
Could have held off on Libra's 'get buckwild crazy' until October when I celebrate 30 yrs married, retirement, and turning 50 in the same week! Add me to the please teach us the provisional cast-on, most "instructions" read like mud...your assignment, CAP should you choose to accept it...(mission impossible..get it?)

Oh! Don't come to Boston right now! We've got your heat wave now! But, if you decide to come at another time, I'd be happy to be your tour guide! Come in the fall when the leaves are changing and you can go "leaf peeping". For real, it's a tourist activity!

Capricorns? obsessing? naw.... (sarcasm)
I like to think of it as identifying and planning for absolutely all possibilities. ever.
Currently I'm obsessing over all of the above plus my weight and my first sock!(which I had to frog 3 of the 4 inches last night due to a pattern-reading error - possibly a consequence of wine+knitting )
And me? first sock? amending the pattern like I know what I'm doing...even after the frog.. HA!
Thank my lucky stars my BF is a Scorpio, looks like we'll both mellow out by the Indian Summer.
Thanks Cap :)

Totally right on! Aries here and I just started mending fences with a friend that really did a very wrong thing. Now I know to leave the fence broken. Thank you!

Scary accurate. I'm a sag and my 10-year reunion is next weekend...

capri here. just bought a honda metro scooter, am thinking about returning to the family farm, usual money ponderings. husband? hmmm...if he does his 'lil jon imitation one more time...

love your 'scopes!

Wow, you hit the nail on the head. I am 100% Capricotn. Kinda sad, really! Where's my spontaneity? Is that spelled correctly? Can a better career/house/hairstyle/footwear/bank account help? Hmmm, better go shopping.

Helen

You didn't mentioned anything about how exciting it is for us Geminis (and the Virgos too) that Mercury is coming out of Retrograde! This is big big news for me! I'm in communications and as Susan Miller says, Gemini's in communications have every right to call in for a month of mental health days during Mercury in Retrograde! So things are sure to be shaping up now!

Otherwise, right on! OK, back to my Know-it-allism commincations work! :)

Ah, summer ... Hot steamy days spent by the lake, icy cold beer, crackling bonfires throwing sparks six feet into the air, toward the full moon, MNR helicopters circling and the fire department screaming up to the beach yelling things like "fire ban" and "restricted burn areas".
Those were the days. So long ago when we were young, stupid and lovin' the beer.
Ah, summer ...

Wow! You got Leo spot-on correct! Too freakin' many familial obligations and whatnot have happened in the last month and I SO need an emotional nap!

You're hilarious, by the way.

Susan Miller has been dead wrong for me for over six months now, even though I love her... I can't read her anymore. Makes me cry knowing none of it will come true.

I love your monthly astrology forecasts. I'm a Cancer, too, and it's dry in the romance department here, too. I hope it gets better, hopefully before November, cause I think we both need it.

Still sportin' it "Crazy Aunt Purl" style with the sunglasses in Ohio.

Later!

Complicated, us Virgo people? Nah, never. We're just perfect in every way, and sometimes kinda bossy ;-).

I'm a Lazy-bonz Leo! Except I count them as anniversaries now...this year is the 14th anniversary of my 29th birthday! After 40 things stop working--including the "grey matter" actually that was the first thing that started going--too much abuse in my 20's!

OK - Caps are obsessive?

Seriously though, you are spot on. Completely obsessed. Right now I can talk for an entire week about my financial and housing situation. Major future planning going on.

And - I have no intention of smacking you upside the head. I think...

Aries (oon the cusp of Pisces) here. As a Pisces I spent last evening designing a new quilt. As an Aries, who says we don't hold a grudge? I can still tell you who wronged me in elementary school, and my 40th college reunion is not that far away. Maybe it's the Pisces?
Saw on the news that things are starting to cool down for you. Hope that is true.
Still sweltering in PA.

I am a Cancer and you are SO right on the money. What I don't understand in the romance department is how can all my friends husbands/boyfriends think I'm wonderful - but none of the single men I meet feel this way? Please someone explain that one to me!

Sign me up too on the Cancer bandwagon. I just had a birthday and my husband? He FORGOT. He has since redeemed himself - well, about 90% - but man, did that SUCK. Since then there has been one other major man-booboo and we're working on that. Good grief.

He's a Scorpio. So was my last husband. I'm doomed.

Ok, I'm one Virgo inviting you in!! I sorta fit your description but not always. I love your monthly hor-o-scopes. Thanks for making me look at myself and see what others might see from their perspective.

Sigh...I know I'm not supposed to believe in all this stuff but everything about Capricorn is so true...two days into the month and I REALLY want to hit someone already...which is related to house hunting woes...which is related to financial woes...which is...you get the drift :)

I'm thinking from skimming through the comments that all y'all cancers are in the same boat I'm in... I don't think I can hold off til November, though. My sanity's gonna be gone with no forwarding address long before then!

Okay, I'm veto'ing the Sag's this month and adopting Scorpio's or Capricorn's instead. Is that allowed? :)

Cuz really, I've been doing the nostaglia stuff lately (I'm selling my house ... and my car (which I loved) just got totalled Friday night) and am moving into my new place on Saturday. So, starting Saturday, I am looking FORWARD. No more nostaglia. So let's pretend I'm a Scorpio or Capricorn this month .. pretty please?! A couple more weeks of working my butt off with this move and redecorating and such ... then I'm sitting on the deck with my margarita AND NOT LOOKING BACK! (*insert foot stamp*)

:)

Well, this Cap knew things were getting a little tense, so it's good to know I'll be feeling better by the time the kiddoes get back to school. So their new teachers won't think they have a total whackmobile mom on their hands. I shall take deep breaths and go to my Happy Place (which is Patternworks.com). :)

Oooh, I like the Scorpio this month.

I do not mind if my planetary accountant intends to take her vacation this month, but I really wish she had returned the phone call I left her in April before she left. I need an extension on my 2005 karma.

As a Virgo, I am a mystery to myself sometimes. Interesting about letting the walls down-I just want someone to climb over them, you know???

How do you come up with this? I'm a Cap and that is so spot on. I have recently been considering a major life/career change and I was taking this month to plan it all. Scaaaaaary!

Dubai is good! BUT NOT THIS TIME OF YEAR!!! Go in Jan or Feb... it's nutty to think one can go there in the summer. But it's good. I should know -- I was born there ;)

HOLY CRAP! I have DONE everything your Capricorn horoscope forecasted ... and it's only day 2 of August. Yikes.

Laurie you are an astrological wonder!

I, unfortunately, am an Aquarius. Within the last 7 days, my car, my iPod, a filling, and my cell phone have broken. Your horoscope today simultaneously freaked me out and gave me some comfort and hope. That may sound strange, but hey, I'm an Aquarius. Thanks so much!

Hey, if you like to travel in your head, you should read Honeymoon With My Brother. Great story and you feel like you've travelled the world with two cute guys.

Thank you for the scopes. I'm a Cancer and I'll sue astrology with you any day.

Just got here because another linked to your horoscopes. Dear heavens, you're spot on! As a Sagittarius, I am an almost-winter baby. I notice and mentally record every day on some level, because when I was growing up, all my friends had summer birthdays. Lots of pool parties, lots of cake and ice cream, never any presents for me. When Christmas rolled around, I'd get one present that counted for birthday AND Christmas. So yeah, I remember the summers past when August gets here.

Also, this month I'm moving to Canada with my husband. First, I get extra nostalgic because I'm packing up my whole life and taking it somewhere else. Second, my husband's a Cancer. There's no romance right now because we're stinky from all the packing, and our faces are all swollen because our allergies are aggravated by the dust!

Hey! This month that Virgo sounds like me! Most of the time I read about how obsessively together us Virgos are and think "Man, I wish I hadn't missed that bandwagon." I'm definitely organized, and no one can tell that but me. :) In other words, please, please, please, don't come to my house and look at my desk.

Strangely enough, you've also got my husband (a ridiculously good-looking Scorpio) pegged this month. He gets home from Iraq in a few weeks. :) Happy birthday to me!

DUBAI??? Why Dubai? Its hot (and tacky) like SO CALI.
Try Amsterdam!!

Laurie, will you come live in my pocket? That's how much I heart you and your Hor-O-Scopes.

*snort* ancient redneck secret!

Interestingly enough, I offered to change my schedule at work until someone is hired to replace my opposite number if it was made worth my while. The first paycheck reflecting this change will appear in September. Damn,you're good! I could use a little beacon of hope in the romance department, though...

I'm a Gemini and that pegged me to the T. I'm actually DYING to go back to SCHOOL. I.need.to.do.SOMETHING.

Give me until October before I am longing for winter break.

As a fellow crab, I have to agree with you re: the lack o' love in da house. For me it's been a lonnnnnnnnng dry spell - as in YEARS. It's gotten so bad that I fell in love with a man today just from the sound of his voice, and started plotting ways to slip him my email address.

Speaking of travel, there's a slim chance I may get some work in Dubai, and I've been chomping at the bit to go there, but in winter time, thankyouverymuch. I've also recently discovered a plethora of knitting-related travel, (cruises, etc.), which is something that really appeals to me. In fact, I created a little "Knitting Excursions" section in my blog's sidebar, and am going to try to keep that up to date. It's fun to fantasize, isn't it?

I think you may underestimate the Aries grudge-holding, but I'll still take your advice. The hor-o-scope is usually right on...

I have to say I am with you on this what the hell with love for cancers crap. Who said that the universe needed to take the stupid stick to my pinata ass with those two boys?? And oh yeah the rest of my karmic bombs dropping everywhere life????

If summer doesn't work (and kerbloey is not my idea of working) then fall/winter better be better. If it isn't, I'll join you and say we make it a class action law suit!

Have you checked out - VEGAS! (It's a dry heat & shoud=ld be dirt cheap from LA...)

God, my Taurus horoscope is right on the money. I can already forsee my August financial situation and it's gonna be just like that. Yikes!!!

By the way, Portland is about 1.5 hours from LA by plane and it's nice and cool (been under 80 all week long). Perfect for a weekend getaway! Plus there are many cute men here.

And, I read your blog every day. I love it.

darlin' you are truly the queen of horrorscopes. i mean it. i always want a new month to get here really fast just so i can read your predictions which are almost always true for us Caps and fun to read to boot. i've had this feeling that august would be the defining month for me and i'm glad to see that the stars agree. btw, it's not easy but i think i'm learning how not to obsess - or maybe i'm obsessively learning how not to obsess :o)

my birthday is on Friday! thank you for horrorscopes! catsigns unite!

You know, you really ought to get a book deal out of this web site/blog. It's so very entertaining. I started knitting in earnest right around when you did so I can relate to where you are skill-wise and obsession-wise. And then there's the beer. And all the other funny funny stuff.

Bake a cake in this weather? You gotta be kidding. We are heading for Maine this weekend for our annual two-week vacation by the lake, and I'm hoping my inspiration returns to me on the cooling breezes.

I am starting to wonder if perhaps they lied on my birth certificate. I am a Cancer who meets lots of men. I just sometimes end up choosing the wrong one but I always figure that it is fun while it lasts and perhaps I'll learn something. Of course, I am also very outgoing -- thank you, Sag rising.

Astro-weed? Hee hee, it really does help you forget (forgive).

Oh my dear sweet lord...if this is as artistically inspired as I'm going to get all summer I am doomed. Doomed! I might as well take up making loopy potholders or crosheting hoop skirt toilet paper covers.

Maybe the winter will be better. Heh.

As an unemployed Cap... I HOPE YOU ARE RIGHT!!!!

Bwahahaha! Your blog always cheers me up.
I hear you on the smoking... every time I'm in the UK I think I'll NEVER quit!!!

Dear Laurie, you are either a genius or psychic or maybe both. You hit not one but two nails on the head, both me (Pisces) and my daughter(Capricorn). I hadn't even read the horrorscopes and visions of original designed handbags and other handsewn items have been floating in my head for days! And DD, she is all stressed about moving away to college, 350 miles from home. Wow! You ar really something!

Now: who's going to win Project Runway? I predict Laura/Michael!

I am a Cap. and you are right on the money. Moving, soon to be jobless (back to school full time), and read to kick-ass. Why do we (caps) want to clobbler some mindless fool? Or, by saying that have I answered my own question? ;)
You can't blame the logic of a Capricorn.

This fellow Cancerian will join your class action suit against the Astrology if this love thing doesn't pan out in November. This has gone on LONG.ENOUGH. Sheesh!