I am first!! First!! I am just giddy and forgot what I wanted to write....

Oh wow, I'm first today! We don't talk about traffic behind the "orange curtain" as much as Angelinos/Valleyites, but we sure do beyotch beyond belief.

Oh never mind, I'm #2 today.

This sounds just like what people in Atlanta talk about at parties! I've been told by New Yorkers that Atlanta traffic is just as bad or worse than the traffic there, but never once has a driver from L.A. said that! I feel for you. This is why I moved 6 miles from my office (but it has taken me over an hour to get home even being that close)

Bret Easton Ellis writes creepy books, but he writes them well!

Laurie,

I just got my copy of Interweave Knits in the mail and I went straight to the article on Annie Modesitt. You are QUOTED in the article!!!!!

Did you know??????

Oh yes, I was especially happy that I had an ex-angelino (Receda) doing the driving when I was there last... He is my ex now - so there goes that plan if I ever return....

Liz... a few folks had alerted me about it just this week, it was a huge surprise to me, too!

But also: THANK GOD they finally did a big profile on Annie. Hooray!

OMG - Did you catch the incredibly high speed chase that went right by your little Encino house this morning!? Swear to you...

By the way, you're right, that 134/101 split is a bitch for tourists. Also, I tried a new way to work this morning...not so good...

Oh well. Maybe tomorrow will be better! HA!

I just had to comment even though I live 4 hours from your crazy traffic.

I live on a side of my town that has a new freeway.

Anyway, I was sooo excited when the freeway was extended four more miles. When I give people directions to my house, I actually have to tell them to go "all the way to the end of the freeway". I'm that far out in the sticks.

I was excited until I discovered I wasn't the only one so far on the east side and we now have merge hell. It is exactly as you described in your post. But now we have weekday mergers that work fairly well together and the weekend mergers that have absolutely no clue what they're doing. If I happen to be on the freeway on a weekend, this is when my road rage comes out. It's that bad.

And talking about traffic isn't crazy! It just is. :)

About the traffic? It's like the traffic in NYC. Mention the Belt Parkway to someone in Brooklyn and watch them shiver. Same thing with the Brooklyn-Queens Expressway (BQE), the West Side Highway and any bridge or tunnel in any borough.

"rush hour on the 405"

*WHINE* That is indeed some deep, existential pain, there.

I;m so excited for you Laurie!!!! And Annie, too!!! :o)

hehehe. Yeah, folks here in Portland, OR complain about traffic a lot but I just have to giggle .... because I lived in LA for 25 years so I KNOW how bad traffic can be. And this ain't nuthin! ;)

Yep, driving sucks in LA. I try and stay west of Doheny and then only go out at certain times of day! This is one reason why I keep the job I have. Close to home, no freeways, close to the gym etc. You on the other hand get to have all these great adventures and foder for conversation.

...and you are remembering your Courtesy Wave, right?

congratulation on the quote in IK -- i haven't seen it -- because of course i haven't gotten by IK yet and they have the nerve to ask me to renew my subscription in the same breath.

He uses "party" as a verb and lives with his parents? Oh dear.

My sister tried to set me up with this guy she knows who's from New Jersey, and who, unbeknownst to me, used to tease my sister about growing up in Indiana. (She now lives in Washington, D.C. and I was visiting her there.) He came over, I opened the door, he saw I was knitting and sneered, "And where are YOU from? Mayberry?"

I very cooly replied, "No, Los Angeles, actually," and ushered him into the living room. I was polite for the rest of the afternoon, but he picked up pretty quickly that he had crossed a line.

Honestly! And he's from New Jersey!

Too funny. NY is pretty bad for traffic but in a different way. Nine years ago I got rear ended on a highway during rush hour and my car was totalled. Wouldn't you know that people flipped me off on their way by - as if I got my car totalled on purpose to screw up their commute.

Lisa! Ok, that is a yikes dating story, LOL. Mayberry indeed.

maryse... it was a big surprise to me, I don't know about it, they lifted a quote from the website but didn't put a URL so I'm guessing they didn't want to direct folks to a website that has, uh, colorful language? hehehehe

Donna, I do my courtesy wave of course. And since I'm in a Jeep, which is pretty open to the John Q. Public, I also smile when necessary. Only when it won't get me abducted.

Part of the problem with the split is the road signs. They put Sacramento and as the destination of the 101 so if you are a tourist and have no idea if Sacramento is East, West or South of LA you don't move over until you realize you aren't going to San Diego so you must be going to Sacramento.

Well, I was at that party last year (thanks Laurie!), and I partook in all the traffic talk, because my drive each day is HELL (Burbank to Santa Monica)!! It's not party talk, it's group therapy!

I'm in that 101/134 split each evening, and I like to call those folks in the center lane "sneaker dogs"...because usually it's those damn luxury cars that don't want to wait with the other folks in the left two lanes, and think they can just cut to the head of the line. Damn them to hell.

Oh, I get so upset about traffic...I have to go calm down now.

Kisses

Well, I was at that party last year (thanks Laurie!), and I partook in all the traffic talk, because my drive each day is HELL (Burbank to Santa Monica)!! It's not party talk, it's group therapy!

I'm in that 101/134 split each evening, and I like to call those folks in the center lane "sneaker dogs"...because usually it's those damn luxury cars that don't want to wait with the other folks in the left two lanes, and think they can just cut to the head of the line. Damn them to hell.

Oh, I get so upset about traffic...I have to go calm down now.

Kisses

Apologies for double post...forgot to sign my name....I need to calm down...

Heh - all we talk about in Minnesota is the weather. Okay, and traffic in the season that is known as "Road Construction"

We had a hell of a lot to talk about the time it was so hot that some patch they used on one of our major freeway's failed and was coming up as people drove over it - - now that was conversation.

i have a question for the LA commuters...do you get in trouble if you are late for work or do they build that into the system?

..And when someone comes to visit me, whether they land at LAX or Burbank, before they make their reservations, I ask them to PLEASE try not to land ot take off around any rush hour...(how's that for a rude hostess)? The 405 can be unbearable - especially if you have to get to LAX in a hurry!

The same thing happens in NYC, except the conversation is about how big (or small) your apartment is and what you are paying in rent. Never fails. Length of the commute is a sold backup conversation topic, but it's all in terms of how many subway stops, etc.

Cursingmama's spot on for weather in Minnesota. I don't know if it's the farm culture or what - but it's never as warm/cold/breezy/rainy as it used to be, and damn, people can talk about that for a long time.

When I'm in really bad traffic, I just call and let my boss know ... usually if I'm thinking I might be 30 minutes or more late. Or if something is on fire, or if there are choppers circling overhead (those are signs of bad traffic.)

On rainy days everyone is late. So that's expected. WE ARE CRAZY.

That is so funny.
Traffic here means you have to wait five minutes at the stop sign to turn because there are more than two cars driving in the one lane that doesn't have a stop sign. No lights. About a million stop signs, but no lights.

Sounds like L.A. has the too many cars/trucks on the freeways and all the merge fun, but do you have intersections that look like this?
_\|/_
/|\
St. John's, Newfoundland does. Seriously. They say if you can drive in St. John's, you can drive anywhere in the world.

In Cincinnati these lamers talk about the Weather!
It's the conversation starter and ender. "Did it rain where you were today?, WOW it's sure hot our there, It's supposed to be warm tomorrow," BIG DEAL.. it's weather! Unless you are a farmer or construction worker.. which no one is around here.. then talk about something else! Like the traffic this morning and how bad it was because these people can't drive in the RAIN!...hehe

Ok. I am truly convinced now that you need to write a book. You are a terrific writer and I am so entertained by you every day! Thanks for writing your blog!

Unbelievable - CAP, You know we all sit around here apparently trying to be the first commenter (or among the top 100) comments just went from 4 to 30 in about 2.5 minutes flat....impressive.

Hmmm....traffic....people here (Omaha) try to talk/complain about traffic - until people like me** tell them to quit whining about their 15 minute commute and try driving in a real city.

**People who have been to/driven in an actual LARGE CITY where blog-worthy traffic actually exists.

Hi, Laurie. I'm weighing in as one of the five readers who lives in L.A. She's not kidding, folks, traffic is a major concern here, we spend half our lives in it.

Glad I caught your comments while there are only 30-something of them. Usually by the time I read you, you have 90-odd comments and I feel bad about adding to all the reading you have to do!

If you ever get out to A Mano in Mar Vista, I'm teaching there these days. -K.

OK, poll: which is worse, LA traffic or Laurie's comment traffic?

How many times must we tell you to write a book? (I was gonna tell you before Liz did, honest.) You could call it Snakes on a Divorced Plane from Louisiana Stuck in Traffic While Knitting.

You speak the the truth -- I was a tourist driving in LA and will NEVER do that again -- and it was 10 years ago. We spent half our vacation sitting in traffic... without air conditioning.

Christine G. – Burbank to Santa Monica? *gasp* Cripes, why don’t you just move in with the homeless people at the beach. You’d have an ocean view and wouldn’t have to commute. Perfecto!

cursingmama – I was gonna say, the only comparable perverse pleasure to Angelinos surviving and discussing traffic is Minnesotans surviving and discussing the winter ;) I’ll take the winter personally, that’s why I’m moving back to WI someday.

If you are on the 405 at rush hour you must really hate yourself. Take Sepulveda, it still sucks but at least there is usually some movement going on.

By the way, I got home from the Roxy last night in about 15 minutes becaue it was 1:30am and there was no traffic. Normally getting from the Sunset strip to Mar Vista would take 35-ish minutes in “light” traffic and up to an hour in “normal” traffic.

See, going on and on about traffic. LA is its own kind of crazy.

Tee-hee! My grandparents lived in Bellflower when I was a kid! Then they moved to Pennsylvania when I was about 14. That was sad. But hey, no traffic except for PA dutch buggies!

I battled the LA traffic as a non-Angeleno this past weekend, and it was a little scary, but I feel like I deserve some sort of medal for making it through without hurting my rental car. And I can totally relate to why traffic and freeways could be excellent conversation fodder in LA!

Helen

SNAKES ON A PLANE!!!

My LA traffic story: Was in LA for business last October with my boss; we were staying in Woodland Hills, auditing a lab in Van Nuys. The first day we were there, we were flabbergasted -- there was NO traffic. We live near Philly, so traffic gets pretty bad here, and we were shocked. Shocked! to see this "bad LA traffic" people were so whiny about.

Until our second day there. When we realized the first day we were there was YOM KIPPUR and so there was nobody on the roads. The second day, we did indeed feel your pain. Pain pain pain. LA has every right to complain about its traffic. So says this Philly native. :)

I have tried that late due to traffic thing before...very few people really buy it because they all face the same traffic, and yet they managed to get to work anyway. But the rain thing is definitely true. My funny traffic story is related to last summer when I was consulting for a while. I had to get from Pasadena to West LA every day for a couple of weeks (for those of you out-of-towners, that is about 30 miles). The woman I was working for told me to plan on being there about 10 am, so that traffic wouldn't be so bad. So the first day I left at about 8:45, and got there about 9:45. Did that for a couple of days, and then needed to leave early one afternoon and didn't want to lose the hours. So I left about 8:15...and got to the office about 9:40. The next day I left at 7:45...and got to the office about 9:40. That's the really really weird thing about LA traffic...5 minutes earlier or later can make a difference of an hour on your commute.

While I don't totally understand your perverse pleasure in your traffic, I can appreciate it. I live in NYC, and we take a perverse pleasure in how much we pay for rent. It gives a New Yorker a little thrill to say to someone from Ohio, "I pay $1500 for a 300 square foot studio." So I can at least get where you're coming from with the perverse pleasure.

My favorite thing about people who live in LA is how you refer to I-405 or I-5 as THE 405 or THE 5...up here in Seattle, people just call it 405 or 5, no need for that pesky pronoun :)

I tried calling it THE but then people thought I was from California and well *sigh* that just didn't work out.

Liz R -- I agree with your mentions but believe that the Cross Bronx is by far and away the worst at all times of the day.

Gretchen -- Do as we do here in NYC -- don't ever pick up guests from the airport! Everyone has to find their own way into the city, even parents and in-laws. They all understand.

Kim -- How did you find a studio for only $1500? :-) I once lived in a studio that was about 180 ft. square -- true story -- and I was glad to have it.

Laurie -- Hiya!

Kim, that's the worst thing about living in the Boston area: we have traffic, but not as bad as LA's, and high housing prices, but not as high as NY's, and nasty winters, but nothing like Minneapolis's. All this suffering and we don't even get bragging rights. And the Red Sox even went and won the World Series two years ago, so we have to defer to Cubs fans now. (This does not in any way mitigate the Utter Evilness of the Yankees.)

Hello, dahlink. Just checking in from an Internets cafe in Seattle. I must tell you, I thought the drivers in Sacramento were bad but I was WRONG, WRONG I tell you.

Seattle drivers suffer from two altogether different maladies. The first is pathological politeness. See, they're afraid to block intersections so they JUST DON'T GO. And they always want to let each other in, so then two cars will sit across from each other, waving one another into the big fat hole that neither automobile has claimed. Weird. These drivers would get creamed after 30 minutes in Sacramento traffic.

The other Seattle affliction is the brain-addled bob-and-weave maneuver. Apparently folks here are so hopped up on Tully's, Starbucks, and Seattle's Best Coffee (SBC) that they can't see straight. I can think of at least four separate occasions, in the short space of three days, when my friend's Jeep has barely missed being blindsided by a weaving vehicle.

As if the polite/funky drivers weren't enough, the Seattle area has the additional element of WATER. Large bodies of water. This creates bottlenecks at bridges aaaaand commute problems for people on islands, etc., because they rely upon the Washington State Ferries to get them into the city for work. Dude! Ferries on cars! It's a mad, mad, mad, mad world up here.

But have I mentioned that today's high is 72? Yeah, that's why people tolerate the traffique. :)

The hubby comes from So Cal, and every time we go down there to visit, I see this phenomenon in action. Thanks for the chuckle!

It's not merge hell. It's thinning the herd. I always loved watching people trying panicing with their maps as they tried to understand what was happening. *L*

Oh, and up here in NorCal, it's weather, traffic and city people.

Okay, I admit that y'all in LA have a much bigger obsession with your traffic - but I can get behind it, because I lived for 2 years in the Maryland suburbs of DC, and we had a little thing called "The Beltway"? Holy God. There is a wee traffic obsession in the DC area. Ask any DC-area resident about the Springfield Interchange, also known as "The Mixing Bowl." And then duck & cover. :) It seems, though, that in LA you have your resignation to the traffic - I believe you called it a deep existential sigh - whereas in DC it's more of a swearing contest. Lots and lots of swearing occurs on the Beltway. Both the Inner and Outer Loops. And the Mixing Bowl.

It's possible things have changed on the Beltway; I moved away 6 years ago (job change, not traffic anxiety - ha!). But that's how I remember it. If any fellow Crazy Aunt Purl fans still live in the DC area, I'd love an update! :)

I can't complain about local traffic too much, so I tend to bitch about the hellish humidity in Richmond, VA.

But I must say, I once spent a week commuting to DC for a (useless) seminar, and after a week of spending 3 hours each way to go about 100 miles (where the 25 miles closest to DC took 2 hours), I wanted to die. Obviously, I could not survive the traffic in LA, so it is very, very good that I don't live there. (except, you know, not being able to hang out with CAP in real life--that is a disappointment!) :-)

Okay, you're preaching to the choir here (ex-Californian on board). Traffic is a leveler among people in California. It brings people together, despite race, sex and age. Everyone out there loves to bitch about it, and it is always fun to talk about.

Julie--unless things have changed since last September (when my week of DC hell occurred), the Mixing Bowl, the Beltway, all of DC traffic is as fucked up as ever. You're not missing anything. (or--not anything good, anyway)

Snakes on a Divorced Plane from Louisiana Stuck in Traffic While Knitting. Ha ha ha Lucia! That is brilliant!

Here in San Diego the only safe topics of conversation with strangers/new acquaintances/family who like to get all confrontational about us burning in hell for our voting choices are traffic(the commute) and real estate. And since real estate has actually taken a bit of a dive lately (some zip codes the houses have lost 20% of their value! That's a down payment gone-whoosh!) and some people aren't fairing too hot with it, now traffic is really the only truly safe topic of conversation. Good thing we all have lots to say about it and we all agree everyone else is moronic.

Julie & Tara -- if anything it's worse as the construction/destruction of the Wilson Bridge has boloxed up everything from Springfield to Andrews, with rippling effects beyond. That's one reason I bike to work.

Ohhhh! I get it! We kind of do that with the weather.

hehehehe... I would also like to point out that a few of the Los Angelenos here on the very comment thread have talked about their commute or given you a traffic story!!

Also, does anyone think that license plate holder was either:
A: The jealous wife's idea

B: This guy is weird and waves the marriage freak flag high high

or C: it's sweet, but because I am jaded and still kind of post-divorce-traumatized, I don't get it?

Or does it mean:

D: He's already someone's dad and so you can't have him as your daddy?

E: He's the best dad, but was abducted by aliens?

D is close, Laurie, with a little A mixed in. It means he's already his wife's kids' dad and having lucked into a good one and/or just finished training him, she's not about to give him up.

I speak from experience.

Hmmm, maybe he likes to ask "Who's your daddy?" when . . . umm . . . nevermind, dirty mind.

Helen

5 readers, I think there might be a few more

Helen, when I first saw it, mind you it was early morning, I thought the same thing ;)

I just thought of all the messages to have custom-engraved on a license plate holder, that was an odd one. I would prefer one that says, "If you tailgate me I will make my car fart on you" or something.

As I took the public transportation for my first 11 years in LA, I had always heard about the 134/101 split but never experienced it. It had become a sort of mythical beast in my mind. Then, one fateful day after I had been driving for about a month, I happened upon it unawares.

Words cannot describe the sheer panic I felt when I saw the signs and realized, "Holy Shit! It's the split!!! What do I do???" It was like suddenly seeing Bigfoot after all the hype and not being able to steady the camera. I made it through alive and now it's not a big deal, but man, that first time...

Hey, Guy Real, I meant to tell you I don't have my graffitti pics anywhere online but maybe I'll post a gallery of them some day.

LOL @ Laurie Ann hehehehehehe

LUCIA!!

That is THE best title of anything ever in the history of the world!!

"Snakes on a Divorced Plane from Louisiana Stuck in Traffic While Knitting"

Snakes on a Divorced Plane from Louisiana Stuck in Traffic While Knitting.
Love it. But let's not forget the cats.
Snakes on a Divorced Plane from Louisiana Stuck in Traffic While Knitting with Cats.

Sorry, the cat's thing is mine.

btw the quickest way downtown from past coldwater is to take the 101 -> 134 -> 5s -> 110 n skips like a lot of traffic.

Snakes on a Divorced Plane from Louisiana Stuck in Traffic While Knitting with Cats, Pass the Wine

DC is the worst place to drive. I mean LA is bad because of the traffic, but DC is worse because a) the traffic is still pretty bad and b) Marylanders and NoVas have no idea how to f*ing drive! Completely oblivious. Sorry I just had to get that out of my system. I had to take a stretch of I-270 to work for about 7 months, and I’ve dealt with the beltway, and thank god I was only thrown in the direction of the mixing bowl a handful of times. Talk about merging hell.

But consider this: DC has a functional and convenient public transport system that people actually use! I had the pleasure of commuting by train to the second job I took there. I got so much reading done, and didn’t have to go to work if above ground metro stations were closed because of snow/hurricanes/etc. All hail functional public transportation. And be grateful.

And where's the beer?

I vote A, and she's his third wife.

You're making me homesick talking about the traffic in the valley! But I DO NOT miss it! Besides our traffic here in Vegas is getting just as bad as LA. :)

Drunk snakes and divorced cats knitting on a plane stuck in traffic from Louisiana?

LOL, Faith! Do you suppose we could work Francisco in there somewhere?

ok - no.

Snakes on a plane
Cats in a Jeep
Wine in the glass
Mr X is a creep.

Ha ha Lucia!

I am Francisco!

Let me think about it for a few minutes and try to come up with something...

Yep, it's true, that traffic-speak. I find that traveling south over the Conejo Grade requires a sort of committment that I can rarely muster.

Garden has grown tall
it does not deserve to live
I am Francisco

I live out NEAR Bellflower... and let me tell ya, the feeling is mutual!
I could never date a guy in LA, simply because I cannot stand to DRIVE thru LA!
I once DID date a guy who lived in Santa Monica, though. I lived in San Clemente. Luckily, most of my driving was done late at night after I got off work... or around 10am after the morning schmutz had died off.
OR -- I'd take the TRAIN in and make him pick me up at the LA Station!

I love it when you tickle me. I'm just saying...

Turn this blog into a book!

I'm one of the California readers (probably not one of the 5 LA readers, but a little South from there - South on the 5, and the 405 if you want... or the 73 if you feel like paying the toll, but ahh, anyway) and I can tell you I am fascinated with traffic, traffic reports, estimated travel times, etc.

You know, it's because we don't have "weather" here, or at least we didn't until someone shoved us all in a big effing OVEN out here. A big, stupid HUMID oven.

I couldn't help but to delurk (finally) today as this post and thread on LA traffic reminded me so much of Karen Tei Yamashita's excellent novel, _Tropic of Orange_. Have y'all read it?

Yamashita said that she was inspired to write the novel--or at least she got the first image and one of the characters--from her time spent commuting on the LA freeways. In fact, most of the novel unfolds on the Harbor Freeway where there has been a massive collision/fire/etc. When all the people are forced to leave their cars, the homeless take up residence in them, forming their own little township right there on the LA freeway. Also, one wonderful character is an Asian American sansei who conducts "symphonies of traffic" from a freeway overpass. I always have this image of this "conductor" in my head anytime I now go under any freeway overpass.

So sorry to make this post so long, but when I read _Tropic of Orange_, I couldn't help feeling that something seemed so familiar to me--even though I've never spent any real time in LA. Then, while reading this post today, it finally struck me: things felt familiar in that novel because of "Crazy Aunt Purl." Wow. What influences and wide-randing effects you are having on people--from Interweave Press to Yamashita's novel to who knows what next...!

Here's a bit of the blurb on the back just in case you're at all interested: "Irreverently juggling magical realism, film noir, hip hop, and chicanismo, Yamashita presents an LA where the homeless, gangsters, infant organ entrepreneurs, and Hollywood collide on a stretch of highway struck by disaster."

Thanks for creating a blog where your readers know that they can always find intelligent, well-written, and of course, humourous, prose. Like everyone else, I always appreciate my daily/weekly read of Ms. Crazy-- :)

brilliant. no, f****ing brilliant. I'm sending this one to everybody I know. and yes, I live in Los Angeles.

My aunt lives in LA and she talks about traffic like she deserves a badge of some sort. After the first time I visited her, I smelted her one myself. Ok, not really, but I would've if I knew how to smelt.

I had to come back and comment again, because I was just on the phone with a friend from Atlanta, and I mentioned this post to him. He immediately started telling me his LA traffic story. It cracked me up that it applied to non-Angelenos, too.

Stella in NYC - ::laugh:: I'm in the Bronx, so my rent stories are to brag about how little way pay for our huge apartment. When I met my husband 11 years ago, he was in midtown in that tiny studio for that price. 180sf is smaller than I've ever seen!

I love your blog! You can stalk mine anytime!

Not only do they not mind here in LA if you are 15 minutes late for work because of heavy traffic - in the Midwest that would get you FIRED - but one rainy day the bosses decided it was just too dangerous for all of us to go out for lunch, so they ordered pizzas for the entire newsroom. I think this was the first rain of the season, when everyone was 2 hours late....

I cannot get my brain wrapped around the fact that when it rains in LA, people DIE in freeway accidents. It's just water from the sky, people.

Other Lisa... OMG... you are too right: I remember a day about two years ago when my boss told everyone to go home early because it was going to rain that afternoon (the sky was dark and ominous, and people said it was supposed to rain...) and he didn't want us caught out in the traffic.

No. Lie.

One of your "5" LA readers here. I cringed when I read "405 in rush hour." And the 134/101 split? eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek!

I've lived in NY, Philly, Dallas, Washington DC and LA. Los Angeles has the absolute worst traffic. All. The. Time. 2pm on a Saturday? Traffic. 2am on a Tuesday? Traffic. Usually for no reason whatsoever.

405=parking lot. As a recovering Angelino, I'd like to add that we never used to say how far we lived, but how long it took at any particular time (i.e. oh, i'm in westwood, so it's like, oh, 45 min to your place in blah blah at 3:00 but if you can wait until 7:00 I can be there in 15 minutes).

now living in the boonies we drive 30 miles but it only takes 30 minutes :) i'm missing my house while i'm doing the daily grind commute behind the orange curtain this week myself!!

Traffic is a universal. I live in the DC area during the week and in the most remote, rural area on the weekend. My office is 4 miles away but it's a 30 minute drive. And of course people are maniacs. And of course summer is tourist season where everyone from Omaha (sorry Omaha) thinks they'll "just drive" into the city.

But what totally kills me is the rural traffic talk. It's certainly nothing on the order of the city, but everybody talks about it. Plus since there are only like 12 people, and if there's a traffic jam it's gonna take all 12 of them, well, we all talk about the same "terrible jam". I've been going there so long that I complain too, but I'm bemused by it.

Heh heh....this is why I live in a trailer for the sole reason that it is within walking distance of JPL, where I work. :)

Aaah! The LA Freeways! I worked at UCLA for a while about ten years ago...when I flew out there from NC to interview for the job, my future boss sent me directions--from LAX to Westwood--ON THE FREEWAY (don't remember which one). Landed just after dark, at rush hour, rented a car, and spent the whole drive trying to choke down a panic attack!

After moving there, I couldn't believe he hadn't give me directions for the perfectly nice surface streets! (MEN!)

Gotta love LA.

Thank you, Cookie. I was going to say that you have to add weather. It's really a lot of fun what with the microclimates in the Bay Area. Two people at a party could have had completely different weather experiences that day. The "city people" topic is a little baffling to me though. Did you mean those who live in urban areas vs. those in the burbs?

well, I really have no reason for posting, as I've lived in rinky dink Terre Haute, Indiana all my life and the most exciting traffic stories I have to tell involve the 2 times I've drive in Chicago, my occasional excursions to Indianapolis and driving to Ohio once a year for a convention. Why they bother with a "Welcome To Ohio" sign is beyond me, you can tell when you've crossed the border by the people cutting you off at 80 miles an hour and the frantic background music that begins to play. Well, ok, I might be kidding about the music, but.... I'm just sayin'!

I am one of the LA people... I live just off of the 101/134 split and holy hell does it make me crazy! I hate the cheaters who sneak in. But thank god the heat has laid off... traffic in the heat = total road rage.

D.C.-area Beltway traffic - nothing worse.

Read it and weep Angelinos... it takes me 15 minutes to ride my bike to work (20 if I had too much wine the night before), but I usually drive and that takes, um, 6 minutes.

sorry, couldn't resist.

While I don't live in LA anymore (I moved to san diego when I was five), i have a lot of family who does and we go up there quite often. I can feel your pain.

Well, not really. But i do know what your'e talking about.

oh. my. god.... the number of comments is 101. Do you KNOW how bad the 101 can get? I was once driving it and I SWEAR, it took me 45 mintes to go five miles!

Dagny, I'm in the Sacramento burbs. The "city people" or, more kindly, the transplants are the ones who freak out when it rains, is foggy or gets over 104F three days in a row. They work in local news and love to name rain storms like it's the end of the world.

Once you've lived here for a decade or so, you're not impressed with 104 because you remember the summer it was 116 or the winter when they were using jet skis in a flooded intersection. The "city people" are also the ones that call 911 when there's a lizard in their house or a snake on their patio. Can you tell I'm a local? *L*

DC resident here... My hubby (a rare native in this transient place) describes DC traffic as a combination of drivers: Southerners on qualudes and Bostonians hyped up on cheap trucker speed. (No offense meant to either population.) It's true - we are not northern or southern and the driving styles are...unpredictable. And thats before you get tourists trying to navigate the f*'d up traffic circles with screaming kids in the car. Our version of "surface roads" are the parkways (GW, Rock Creek) which, if you know their tricks, can save a lot of agony. Just beware when Rock Creek turns 1-way each evening! Or when all of 66 is HOV. Or when the s-curves back up near the Temple. Yeah, we 'heart' our traffic too.

Amen Mary in Virginia. Amen sister!

I was in upstate NY once and this girl was whining and going on and on about the horrible traffic we were stuck in...There were THREE cars in front of us at a red light. THREE freaking cars at a red light. Obviously someone's never driven on the Pike or sat on the Beltway for two hours only to travel ten feet while being late for work after having left other work early to pick up broke computer which was supposed to be fixed computer but while sitting in Beltway traffic discover that the broke computer is still, sadly, broke computer.

Ah, traffic. At least it's summer and there aren't so many school buses.

DH and I talk of moving somewhere with more things culturally happening, but honestly, we can get across town in 8 minutes in the town we live in. Our town is 28,000 people, good for raising our family and larger cities within a couple hours away. There are drawbacks. But I really enjoy not being in my car that much. I dunno how you all do it. Good music in the car, that must be it.

Can you knit in traffic? Just wondering.
Cuz I definitely would.

Philadelphia is perfect and traffic doesn't exist. Especially if you ride a bicycle. :)

I'm one of the few de-lurkers you have on every post! Just to share that traffic as a major conversation topic is international. Here in sunny Cornwall (sticky out bit at the bottom of the UK) during the summer months we are inundated with tourists from 'up country' (basically the rest of the UK) and there is only one main road in and out of the county which is 2 lanes some of the way but a lot of it is single lane. So the main conversation at work revolves around how busy the A30 is and swearing at tourists and caravans!
(p.s if the link works it should take you to some photo albums which include some pics which show why we have so many tourists visiting Cornwall).

Mandy,
Your link was just a trick to get me to look at your jewelry wasn't it! (LOL) I'm resisting getting into jewelry making and you're not helping. Your work is really, really pretty. Did you knit or crochet some of your pieces?

Carmen in NC

I just met Drew at the Knitting Guild conference in PA a few weeks ago, and he told me to check out your blog. As a Boston native, I can definitely relate to the traffic angst. We even have to worry about collapsing tunnels here! Just mention 'Big Dig' at a party, and you are good for about a half hour, at least. Love your blog!

OMG... rush hour in my small town is like, 5 people waiting to turn left at a stoplight! I love it! Of course, when I am in the big city (in my case, Toronto - it scares the living hell out of me)

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/07/28/us/28heat.html?hp&ex=1154145600&en=51c9f3cd5a424f0c&ei=5094&partner=homepage

i saw this article and i thought of you! stay cool!

So true! I just escaped L.A. to head a bit north (Ojai) and traffic is still a major topic.

HEY, saw you quoted in Interweave Knits!! You're famous now.

I HAVE to weigh in with the other DC-ers here. We complain about traffic, but did you notice? We complain more about how others DRIVE. I've seen u-turns in the middle of the busiest street in Georgetown, and traffic rule violations up the wazoo. If it inconveniences other drivers? I honestly don't believe drivers here even consider that. And what's worse is that I'm gradually starting to follow suit. This morning in my parking garage, I cut through an exit lane to get past a slow driver - and nearly met another car head-on!

So where's that DC party with all those people I'm anxious about conversing with? I'm ready to roll! :)

yikes! I didn't know so many DC people read this blog! I grew up in the Virginis Suburbs of DC, and I still go back to visit my father every weekend. Julie, Tara is right - the traffic is horrendous. Actually, I think it has gotten worse in the last six years. And they actually closed the Wilson Bridge twice in the last two moths, due to construction of a replacement bridge. It was unpleasant to say the least (For anyone unfamilar with the DC area, the Wilson bridge spans the Potomac river on the southern side of the DC beltway).

Purl, I don't know if the traffic is worse in LA, but you certainly have my sympathies. Have you ever thought of working out a telecommuting arrangement with your company? Even if you telecommute only one day a week, it might help.

To the New Yorkers: When I lived in Brooklyn, conversation revolved around rent and trains. Of course, I lived on the L, so there was a lot to talk about.

I commiserate with your married co-worker who thinks dating is such great fun... My married friends think Speed Dating would be great fun - to me it sounds like the inner circle of hell...

Cookie, thanks for the clarification. Those temperatures are why I rarely visit my dad. He lives in Sacto. I did work up there for three years though. Forget about three days of 104. How about a week of 112? Just so wrong.

Julie, Tara, Pixie:

Few months ago drove from BWI to Woodbridge, VA. I spent one hour on the Wilson Bridge. An hour. On a bridge.

New Yorkers:

Cross Bronx. I agree.

Soooo ... I accidentally happened across your website (utterly random google search, your face appeared, and I clicked it).

I'd snap you up in a heartbeat! You can't fool me you know - how can someone looking so young, claim to be 30-something? You can come and live in England with me, and knit me wooly garments for the winter! In return, I will make your cats their own house, and provide you with as much wool as you want! Deal?

OK, it was worth a try ;) Thanks for entertaining me, you have a great website here :)

Dave, get in line, we all loves us some CAP. ;) In a platonic way, though, for the most part!

Helen

p.s. You're also welcome to come visit me, my silly hubby, and our 3 cats here in Portland anytime!

I love CAP so much that I'm riding her glory (it was a major COUP for me that the author of the piece quoted her - I'm just sorry that she didn't make contact!)

Hey - L-girl - contact me if you can, I have a humble request...

Oh, and on behalf of all in NJ, I apologize for the "Mayberry" jerk. What a maroon. I've learned (as a non-native NJ person) that a lot of NJ folks have an inferiority complex due to the fact that we're the butt of almost EVERY NY area joke. NJ actually is pretty wonderful, but that doesn't excuse a dopey comment from that jerk!

Oh, and in NJ the fail-safe topic of heated and lively conversation is TAXES! We have the highest property taxes in the country, and I get a smug sense of satisfaction (?!) when I visit some place and ask about taxes.

- Oh, ours are SO high! We pay almost FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS on our 4 bedroom house!

- Yeah, I feel your pain. We pay $14K on our 3-bedroom house. 4 blocks from Newark.

Minnesota, here we come!

I know EXACTLY what you are talking about; I lived in Pasadena for a number of years. Hey, have you read or heard Sandra Tsing Loh? Another quintessential reflection of LA life.

I understand the pain of merging woes. I live in the Greater Vancouver area. And all I have to say is...

GAH. Learn how to merge anywhere, don't block the intersections on cross streets (a pet peeve), and learn to use your turn signals (D's pet peeve).

In other words, just because your lane of traffic is stopped and mine isn't DOES NOT GIVE YOU THE GOD-GIVEN RIGHT TO CHANGE LANES.

I need to go lie down now.

is drew staying with you when he comes to LA?

Yikes - I know about that split. I was visiting relatives in the Burbank area in May and did a lot of driving while there. I live in N. Calif. and while we have traffic, we don't have as much as you do and people drive differently up here!

I love reading your posts about LA traffic! I used to live in SB and have driven the 101 and the 405 many times (why do people have so much trouble figuring out that you need to step on the gas when you're going uphill?!). Then I moved to NJ and the traffic was not as bad, but much more depressing, because when you're stuck in it you're looking at gray factories and not sunny palm trees! Also, seeing the exit for Mulholland off the 101 is much more exciting than, say, the exit for New Brunswick, because it always made me start singing Tom Petty songs.