I recently called a friend to find out that they had set their ring tone to play "Baby Got Back" when I call, ahem.

Amen, sister! 35 rocks (especially without drunk dialing. I just don't think drunken jazz hands are a sin against nature, so you can keep those if you need to)
And please check your email....

ah, the booty.

*sigh*

...there's a "Baby Got Back" ringtone available? I've got to get me that!

Embrace and love every inch of your lovely self, booty and all. Yee-ha.

Check out the new knitting book, big girl knits,
it has some wonderful knitting patterns and talks about this body thing, just enjoy the body you have, knit yourself wonderful sweaters, look great, be well

I'll see your booty and raise you two.

I'll never forget being 7 years old and having my ballet teacher insist that I "tuck it under". Then she told my mom I had bad posture and a "sway back". A friend at work says I have an "angry butt".

I just got a booty. Plain and simple.

I salute you in your acceptance of da butt. And if you ever find a pair of jeans that accommodates an ample endzone, please - SHARE.

I guess I should have thought that html wouldn't work in comments. I was trying to post a picture of her postage stamp. I hope you get your face on a piece of US Mail.

WOOHOO!

Good for you, cause as I have learned, the big shirt doesn't hide the booty, or the tummy, or anything else for that matter.

Own it and LOVE IT! (and stay away from the funeral potatoes if you are tryin to eat healthy!)

GOOD FOR YOU! I'm 39 yrs old (two weeks ago), I abused my body for too long for the sake of fashion/love/sex. Fuck that noise.

I'm now using the "good christ I need to lose/diet/morph" energy into eating healthier meals whenever possible, drinking good wine, consuming decadent dark chocolates while knitting, laughing, bookbinding, writing, sexing it up, reading, etc. You know, everything *except* obsessing over my body.

When is your birthday, Laurie?? Mine is July 12 when I will be four two. And I have a big booty , and are also a member of the D cup club.

Women are supposed to have curves!! I think skinny and boney woman look awful. We all here think you are gorgeous!!! Right y'all??

Booty is totally hot, EXCEPT when you call it "swollen from the colon"! Gross, Laurie!

Happy Early Birthday! Go on wit yer bad bootylicious self.

Oh! don't forget Queen! "Fat Bottom Girls"
Happy B'Day next month!

Good for you! Live your life in your gorgeous body and shake that ass. Do you know that people are buying undergarments that CREATE a booty bump? Be proud that you look like a woman and not some CK juvenile posing half nekkid.

Hey Monkeygurrl (and all) Some Jeans I've found to work the bootie (surprisingly J.LO jeans do not! whatever!) A limited edition Levi (I found at Ross thanks to my bootie-full sister) that totally allows for thick bootie, but gently fits and flares - they are a darn low rise though...
and Baby Phat jeans (also from Ross - love you Ross)that accommodate the boo-tay while actually fitting in the mid-low waist region without the silly gap at your lower back.
But I've got thick legs too, so these may only work for me ;)

Oh, I hear you. I too was born with a God Given bubble butt.

I applaud your having come to terms with it and your own body.

Happy 35 next month!!!!

I turn the big 3-0 this year. Can I give in to the booty too? I'm sick of thinking about it. *sigh*

48 here! I have to tell you, turning 35 and every year after....is the best thing in the world. You are finally old enough to not put up with all the bullshit you did in the past. You become stronger, funnier, more confident, calmer, and happier. The older I get, the more distant that girl that I was in my 20s and early 30s becomes. The older I get, the more authentic I become. It may actually be worth the extra lines on my face.
Embrace your 35th! You have earned it!!

jodi -- I heard that from my friend carlos, a fan of junk in the trunk LOL.

my bday is June 22, three-five! I think this would be a good year to work on my issues. The Margaret Mitchell year!

I found what I fondly call my "juicy booty jeans" at this ghetto store up in the hood, in Pacoima, it's... some little shop, I forget the name. Anyway! Monkey if you want to go some time just let me know. These jeans sort of mold everything into the Good Shape, and in fact I was wearing them when I met Frog #2, the lone ranger. (Frog #1 being the tall guy). The booty jeans. I love them.

I think Spinal Tap's "Big Bottom" is the finest tribute to us gals with the Rubenesque hindquarters. You should play that to celebrate your 35th birthday!

You are awesome! And so is your booty! I've decided to accept myself as well. All those clothes that don't fit that I keep because I hope they'll fit one day! They will be gone! (Soon, when I get time to clean out my closet, probabably this weekend, because hey, what better way to spend a long weekend than cleaning out your closet?)

Good for you! I have a big booty as well, and only recently came to love it. I look at it like this: I'm built like a girl, and not a 12 year old pre-pubesent boy.

Besides...there are men out there that like the juicy booty gals. My husband is one, and I swear, that is why I married him.

35 is just the beginning. Self discovery is a bitch. Sometimes you need to stir that bitch up! Shake that sh*t!

"dumps in the trunk" hehehe. The song is "The Thong Song" and the line is really "The had dumps like a truck."

So you will be turning 35 the day before I turn 40. I think 35 is the age when I fully embraced the theme of the movie, "Risky Business" -- "Sometimes you've just got to say what the f***." As long as you're not hurting anyone, then just go for it. Who cares if others may think you're nuts. You're out there living life.

Oh, and celebrate the boo-tay. In this day and age, I have yet to meet a man who does not appreciate the boo-tay. Another song I think you should add to the list is R. Kelly's "Snake." I mean any song that includes the lines "Let your money maker jump now" AND "Girl you got me screamin' Fiesta!" -- just classic.

Oh, how you made me laugh! I laughed so loudly that my babies started laughing right along with me, though they know not why.

You inspire me to talk about my butt in my blog. I think I will. Happy early b-day to you!

good for you aunt purl! i had a similar epiphany when i turned thirty five and at thirty eight i had my nose pierced because i always wanted to. (the men in my life told me "i'll leave if you do" so i never did) now, at forty two, i feel more at peace with myself then ever and i can shake my head and smile at people that disapprove of me for whatever reason.(because there will always be those who disapprove) so good for you and your booty..but please...never say "swollen from the colon" again. :)

robinv, right on! you speak my truth.

gone with the wind rocks.

Oh god. Swollen from the colon?

Thanks for the laugh! I needed it sorely.

hehehehehe... swollen from the colon! now ya'll, I just thought it was the funniest thing I ever heard. Gross? Yes. But too funny. I feel so happy to have shared such a thing ;)

and don't forget Thunder Thighs. I couldn't forget it...my father, in his lovingly way, had it etched into my ski poles as a joke. (I lived in Vail and skiied every day) So every day it was like having "Thunder Thighs" labeled all over your knitting needles! A shrink could make millions off me.

I think Margaret Mitchell would agree with the line: "well behaved women never make history"

My kids, 18, 15, 14 wanted to personalize a shirt for me for mother's day that said, "They shake what I gave them!" They refrained, but I think I would have worn it with pride;)
Here's to the bootay

Faith just sent me this quote:

"Until you've lost your reputation, you never realize what a burden it was."
-- Margaret Mitchell

This is just what I needed to read today. Thank you. Sincerely.

Swollen from the colon, eh? Sounds painful! I too have never found a pair of jeans that fits the butt and thighs right without the waistband gap at the back. Not even after losing weight! (And I don't know why any men would be attracted to flat butts anyway - what self-respecting straight man wants a girl to look like she's got the body of a 10 year old boy? This is why I don't understand the Paris Hilton appeal...other than the slut factor)

You totally forgot to mention "Fat Bottom Girl".

Because you know, she makes the world go 'round. Or something along those lines. :)

Well I think your jazz hands are cool.

You know, I recently had my own epiphany. Being a pirate, naturally I am ALL about the booty. And this is good, being a large bootied girl myself. And you're right. You must embrace the booty. Wear jeans that embrace the booty (Torrid is fab, btw, for this.) and flaunt it, sister. You are in GOOD COMPANY HERE.

We could start, like, the L A Big Booty and Knitting Society. We could have tee shirts!

you know what I started doing this week to CELEBRATE the booty? I started taking hula hooping classes. No, seriously, hula hooping. It is impossible to stay grouchy and body hating when you are hula hooping. It's a great core workout that isn't focused on inches or pounds, it's just, throw on a hoop and dance. It is booty celebration because to hoop, one must shake one's thing. It is silly and wonderful and I love it. I cannot knit while hooping just yet but give me time, I'm working that one out.

You want to come hula hoop with me sometime? :-)

Happy Birthday Laurie!
I also have the big butt, the bubble but, whatever you want to call it, and you know what? I like it!

Rainy - the LA Big Booty and Knitting Society should simply had LABB&KS emblazoned across the butt of the Torrid jeans. (I think it would draw plenty of attention to the cause)

Don't forget "Brickhouse", my own personal anthem. Big Booty girls of the world unite!!!

Tanya

hey purly, is there a jazz head move to go with the jazz hands? i can't see the hands by themselves.

Love the "juicy booty" term. Made me laugh out loud. I thought there was a rumor that JLo had her booty insured or something, I don't know, maybe I made that up. But you should look into it, protect your ass-ets and all!

Have a great day!

Hi, first post here. I came for the knitting and stayed for the humor.

And the cats. Of course.

ANYway...I cannot believe you are almost 35! You look GREAT! I would've guessed 28, at the most. Even though I know your masthead reads, "thirty-something." :)

I just read a blurb about women's sizes - apparently they were standardized in the 1940s (thank you WWII) - and set up so that a size 8 was the "average woman's dimensions."

Of course, that was before McD's, Taco Bell and all those fabulous "cake mixes in a box." Not to mention Lipitor, various vaciinations and all the "make you healthy even if you're fat" pills.

NOW the "average" American woman is acutally a size 14!!!!! But yet, still that's a LARGE. Isn't it nice to know that average in the minds of the clothing industry is a LARGE???

wtf?

Let's just say I was a late bloomer but once my body got on the Bloomin' Train it never freaking got off... In college my dad started referring to be as "shelf butt", don't worry he'll be paying the therapy bills someday. ;)

I'm TRYING to learn to accept it and be proud of it (because after all it's the only body I'm going to get) but MAN that's hard. Especially because I SWEAR everything (except music apparently) is against us. Clothes, fashion mags, etc etc etc.

I do have to say that "Back that azz up" makes me giggle EVERY time I hear it.

Good for you. I totally agree. It's exhausting to constantly compare yourself to other people and all it does it take time and energy away from more worthwhile pursuits.

OK. So you change the clothing sizes. Then what do you call what is now called a small? Just wondering.

grande?

My husband's grandmother used to refer disparagingly to a small butt as "two crackers nailed to a shingle."

My husband's answer to my question, "Is my butt too big?": "Too big for what?"

You are beautiful.

And here I thought only my sister-in-law and I knew about drunken jazz hands! Which we also refer to possibly as drunken kung-fu...

Robinv is right...one of the best-kept secrets about getting older is that you no longer give a crap about all that external stuff. I'm going to be 54 in a week, and by God, I will wear what I like and what feels good, not what some woman-hating fashion designer thinks is hot. Embrace the body, booty and all!

Aw, man. There's 2 Jennys now. But, like the other Jenny, I have the bubble butt too. Thank God for Sir Mix-A-lot, though. He made high school WAY easier than junior high.

How long has it been since any of us have actually eaten something without worrying about calories, carbs, fat, etc.??? Well, I for one am FREAKIN' TIRED of it! Here's to loving ourselves and YIPPEE if there's just more to love!

I forget who said this, but it's my personal fav:

"Well behaved women rarely make history"

I was once shopping with my asian friend and tried on a skirt that cupped under & then complained bitterly about my big butt. She said "at least you have one!"

Honest to god, I was around 35 then and had never ONCE thought that someone could have too small of a butt!

Now at 40, I try to embrace the fabulousness of my junk in the trunk. It helps that hubby (the prince after about 40 frogs) is a fan too.

And I hope to Goddess a-line skirts stay in style!

What is it about dads and dumb comments about our bodies that we remember forever? My dad referred to my stomach as a "bagel belly" when I was in 3rd grade and 22 years later I still think my round belly looks like a bagel (back then it was a little frozen lender's bagel--nopw it's a full-blown huge bagel shop bagel).

Love your booty and your boobies! We all need to stop thinking/worrying about our butts. Yeah Laurie!

Yet again, CAP has made my day :-)

Grrl - I could crush YOU with my thighs and kick back a scotch. I hate hearing people disparage their own beauty. In the end, it's all in the perspective and it sounds like you are taking on a great one for the b-day. My husband, BTW, calls it my 'butt ledge' and figures it's good for... holding stuff? (Like supporting the bottom of the backpack.)

I hear ya sister. If they don't like our big arses, then they're welcome to kiss 'em! ;p

Most guys would rather spank/squeeze an juicy booty than a dry, shriveled up one.

Roggey has the right idea. By the way, It's no fun getting drunk dialed... from my MOM?!?!?! I was so embare-ass-ed. Oops! There goes the booty thing again! When I was about 35 I let go of my booty fear and started to shake it. Literally. Just started to walk like a woman and sway them hips back and forth. Since that time I couldn't tell you how many times I've been propositioned! And my back doesn't hurt anymomre, imagine that. Shake it girl, walk like you own it!

30's are the best! At some point in her 30's, every woman begins to just stop giving a shit about the stupid stuff, including ex's. I'm 35, could really stand to go to gym, and I'm smarter, take less crap off others, and feel a million times sexier than I ever did when I was 20 with a tight ass.

Amen!! I have kinda reached that conclusion as of late myself. I mean, afterall, Fat Bottomed girls make the rockin' world go round!

What is with all these rude dads? My dad's line was "Gittin' a little heavy in the hips there, aren't-cha?" followed by "That's OK, you'r mom was heaviest when she was your age too."

What the...

Absolutely brilliant! This one is a gem...

[jazz hands!]

Big butts are fashionable? Really? Here I am, totally in step with the times, and I had no idea. (This is typical. I still have no clue who Richie and Denise are, although they are on the cover of People and about 2/3 of the tabloids. Do they actually exist? Maybe this is some in tabloid joke?)

I am constantly torn between the knowledge that the 15 pounds have found me again and the chocolate lust. Guess which wins.

I did some costuming a few years ago for a play version of The Jungle Book and the director kept telling the actors playing animals, "Jazz Paws!"

Can we rent a ballroom on your birthday and all shake our big booties together?

if i may, welcome to the Just Walking Around With It booty club. we're a fine bunch. :)

40 is even better than 35 when it comes to self-acceptance and life enjoyment. It feels much mo bettah just to be who you are without worrying about what other people think. (And yes, nice trick if you can pull it off, but if you start working on it at 35 with that knowledge ahead of time, you should do fine at 40!)

pity all those skinny butt-less girls who are driven to get silicone butt implants. And who accidentally give puncture wounds with their elbows.

Yeah for accepting your body! Life is too short to worry about how big ones butt is.
And seriously, I had no idea you were 34. Like seriously, in your pictures you look maybe 25. I'm not kidding.

Today I needed this. Thank you. (Big booty girls unite!)

isn't it wonderful to feel proud of a big booty! i once was ashamed and always comparing myself, now i walk around damn proud of my curves...good for you for embracing that!
p.s. sean paul just might be my new hero.

margaret mitchell was cool. sadly, she got hit by a cab about a block away from where i currently work. in fact, i witnessed a four car pile up right where her accident took place (coinkeedink? cosmic lunacy? i think not). i think the Greater Scarlet O'Hara Forces were at work.

of course, peachtree street is just plain treacherous.

Thank goodness for aging! Long gone are the days of wondering "Do these pants make my ass look fat?" Screw that! At almost 50, I am at ease with my body - it is my friend, not my enemy. Life is short. Let's worry about rape, AIDS and clitorectomies, not butt size

And besides, the bigger the cushion, the softer the pushin'.

i believe it was scarlet who said "as god is my witness, i'll never be hungry again"!

food for thought, y'all

Another Backed Up Baby giving you a shout! I think I could embrace my ass much better if I had the DD to balance it all out. My dear, I turn 4-0 next month. We should meet in the middle of the US for a Gemini/Cancer Birthday Big Booty Bash!

my birthday is June 22nd, too. four-five! shite!

If I may, please allow me to suggest the following T-shirt for all of you girls with curves, LL Cool J lovers and fans of the Treasure State:

Montana's Got A Big Ol' Butte
http://www.vintagevantage.com/products_new.php?productcat_id=2&product_id=872&color_id=37

As a flat-bottomed girl I just want to say that I am so jealous of all you bootylicious gals! When I'm lying on my stomach you can rest a drink on my ass without worrying about it spilling. Seriously, there's nothing back there. You all should feel fortunate!

And I think you should add drunken spirit fingers to the drunken jazz hands routine. Because you can't be depressed when doing spirit fingers; they are far too amusing.

Just to set the record straight, not all skinny girls have ironing board butts. I'm just sayin'.

Congratulations, CAP! As a member of the Ginormous Booty Club myself, I suspect it's much nicer to embrace the booty (er, not literally) than resent it.

One thing I love about the TLC song Bootylicious? "I don't think you're ready for THIS jelly."

Ha.

Hey there! I just wanted to let you know that I just discovered your blog (What? I'm a late bloomer!), and spent a good hour reading it. As a recent divorcee, a knitter, a geographical transplant (from NJ to NC), and as someone who can appreciate a good soul, THANK YOU! I just wish to whatever greater thing there is that there were more people like you who lived closer to me! :)

Love,
Nicole

There is a time and a place for jazz hands. Really! Among friends, after a few drinks - jazz hands are fantastic! Don't hate on the jazz hands! :-)

Yay you for being cool with drivin around with junk in your trunk. Just turn the music up and shake your money-maker! (Leave the jazz hands at home, tho!)

Happy early Birthday!

You go girl!

*sniff* *sob* I don't have the bodacious booty! I have all the right attributes to have it...but I'm short-waisted and long hipped, which leads to a strangely sloped butt. I'm better off than mctwin who has no butt at all, but really, the black guys at my high-school used to call me flat-butt because I had no back back there. Makes fitting into pants extremely hard too.

I discovered your blog while searching for sites about decluttering, of all things. I don't knit; don't really even like knitted stuff all that well. But I absolutely adore your blog and have spent more hours than I care to admit catching up from the beginning.

I've noticed numerous traits we share (I'm 5'4" - almost; OCD - diagnosed by my kids; adore the kitties; grew up in California but moved to southeastern Oklahoma and love the south; Gone With the Wind is one of my all-time favorite books;etc.). Now I discover we have something else in common. I met my husband when I was 14 and you wanna know what nickname he gave me? *Cute Butt*, C.B. for short. There's a lot more cuteness now but he still loves it. Thank goodness for men with good sense. And about the age thing? I'll be 43 in August and life just keeps getting better all the time.

Sounds like someone wants a tube top for her berfday...

What are "jazz hands"?

happy birthday girlie. 35 is going to rock.

know what i noticed the other day? even though i'm a much bigger mess than i've ever been i worry so much less about it since i stopped reading fashion magazines. the other day i was leafing through a current copy of allure and i started feeling all weird again. (the editor of allure by the way has the worse hair ever. SHE NEEDS BETTER HAIR AND IF YOU'RE AN EDITOR OF A BEAUTY MAGAZINE YOU HAVE NO DAMN EXCUSE FOR HAVING LAME HAIR).

country living, knitting magazines, and martha stewart living never make me feel fat. just poor. and i can live with feeling poor.

Ok, raise your jazz hands and shake it to this:
http://www.98online.com/podcasting/enclosures/4_21_2006_499795516.mp3

Speaking as a fellow possessor of Ass That Goes On For Days, I say unto you: Preach it sister!! :)

I think we often forget in this day and age of media overload that it's not supposed to be about what you look like, but rather, who you are and what you do with your life. Yes, being able to look good is always fun, but we forget that how we are built does not make us any more or less valuable as a person.

Hi.

I read your blog a lot. I'm in the same situation--divorce/wine situation that is. I love reading what you write, because sometimes,it's exactly what's going on.

Here's my story about my butt: http://yukonjen.com/wordpress/?p=77

Laugh. Love it. Love your butt!

Crazy coincidence, someone just sent me this link to a review of some new jeans someone of normal size tried and loved(also coincidental for the hip-hop song title referencing):
http://www.sundrymourning.com/2006/05/06/the-best-jeans-for-dropping-
it-like-it-is-in-fact-hot/

LOL!
Yep- I hear dat. As a girl descended from a long line of teeny tiny dainty southern women who married full-back sized guys (thanks, grandmothers!) resulting in ME- the girl whose mere fleshless BONES must weigh a damn good 100 lbs. I admit that I simply don't have the friggin time, energy OR DNA to work on being "fashionable and thin".
My only goal in life is to stay in a weight range that will assure that I can be a diabetes and heart-disease-free old bag whose nieces and nephews consider spending time with her as more FUN than "doing time with the oldies". \
And since THAT weight range is WAY easier to get ahold of than Kate Moss's needle-butt (IE- I just have a big 'ol steak and a salad-the-size-of-my-head sans croutons with my half bottle of wine) I think I'm okay with that. It's allll about the wine!
By the way- love CAN hit an "uppity girl of a certain age/size" in Los Angeles at ANY time.
I met the man o' my dreams at fifty lbs waaaayy over weight, acting sassy as hell at a friends house (I'd just given dating the total finger had started MY "Margaret Mitchell" phase) and married him this January, TWO months after turning 35. I'm a few lbs lighter now (just to be in that "healthy" window) but he's plenty happy with my ain't never gonna be less than juicy booty.

Laurie! I love your Margaret Mitchell Living Life Metaphor! When I hit my mid 30's, I decided that I would adopt an attitude towards life like that of Auntie Mame (specifically, the Rosalind Russell Auntie Mame, not the horrific musical version by Lucille Ball, SHUDDER). Specifically, Mame's mottos: "Life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving" and "live, Live, LIVE!".

I am not starving metaphorically or physically (um, yeah, fat bottomed gal here too), and it's WONDERFUL! Take that list of things you were going to do "some day" and DO THEM NOW! It's amazing. Life just gets better every year, and I'm really looking forward to 41 in October.

Now if only I could act and do physical comedy like Rosalind, I'd be in heaven - she was a spectacular woman. Rent "Auntie Mame" and "The Women" and watch with plenty of gal pals, plus wine and other sins available!

-C

Hi Laurie, my name is Whitney and I've been reading your blog for a long time. Just wanted to say hi and bravo! Being healthy and happy is much more important than trying to fit some ideal that .5% of the female population actually fits into! And there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with drunken jazz hands, in my book anyway.

We're all for butt-size equality, right? Flat, bubble, ledge, fat, milk-maid, sloping, jiggly, cat, doesn't matter! It's all beautiful.

bowen29 & sioux - Flat butts do flapper fashion better, console yourself with that! :)

When I was a kid my dad told me that I ran like an elephant. 32 years later, I still remember that distinctly and still feel awkward running. That and Mom telling me, 5 minutes before I went on stage to sing my first solo at a concert, "you're so pale - you should wear makeup so you actually look pretty". Um. Ok. You never let me wear it before now even when I asked, plus I'm singing in a conservative scottish presbyterian church. Not exactly the moment one would pick to put on makeup for the first time in your life.

Uff da.

Amen....shake that booootie.

Four-five, 5'1", thunder thighs, bootylicious, with A-cups. Luckily the football shoulders balance out the bottom.
Do the Shakira bootie shake and jazz hand go together?

I have Sir Mix-A-Lot’s “Baby Got Back” and Queen’s “Fat Bottom Girls” on my iPod workout playlists. Those songs never fail to make me grin like an idiot, other people at the gym must think I’m just really happy to be on the elliptical :P Fools! Here’s to fabulous bootylicious babes everywhere. You will have the best 3-5 ever, I call for an encore of drunken jazz hands.

Oh, and "swollen from the colon” is soooo NOT an expression I will be using in the future. Just sayin’ Ew!

Fat-bottomed girls - we make the rockin' world go round! :)

Just wanted to share...my daughter found this:

http://us.video.aol.com/video.index.adp?mode=2&pmmsid=1645307

It's kind of a struggle, sometimes, especially since many of my closest girlfriends are the teetiny things I always wanted to be, but I am just plain exhausted of holding on to some ideal I can never feasibly measure up to, and even then would it solve all my problems? make me better? smarter? happier? I'm absolutely sure it would not solve all my problems, so I figure in 3-5, I need to make some peace with myself right-here-right-now, because that may be the key to getting to a place I really want to be for the long run.

whoa. ya'll. I just broke all philosophical in the afternoon.

must need coffee ;)

Hurray for 1971 Tropic-of-Cancer chix with bubble butts!! [July 5, me] Have you checked out our Chinese horoscope in combo with the usual one? Year of the Pig water Cancers are all about being self-indulgent sensitive homebodies who like to eat, drink, snuggle, and live-and-let-live. I, for one, am committed to all of that for 3-5.

Wooooohoooooo!

Yep--I am 20 lbs overweight with DD boobs. And 36 years old. Go with it!! Life is too short.

Okay, what is it with the insensitive dads and parents? Geez.

For me it was my Uncle. I was 13 and walking my little cousin to the park one day and feeling pretty damn fine and sassy, and my uncle turns to me and says, "Huh. Look at what you're wearing. I didn't realize they made Gloria Peterbuilt jeans for women."

?????

!!!!!!

To this day, it pisses me off. But it's nice to know I'm not alone after reading all the other traumatic family experiences.

Girl, as an eligible and mostly straight man, I can tell you that sexy starts and ends with confidence and comfort with your body. Un-sexy is "Eeek! I must hide my body from him, in its hideousness, since I am un-bony and appear to have had dinner some time in the last month". Sexy is "Baby, I look forward to sharing my body with you". Period. No caveats or conditions. No "As long as you don't really take in my behind". So embrace whatever kind of beautiful you are. There's a broad spectrum of beautiful out there, and you're in it. I've seen the pictures.

Honey, the big three-five is just getting started. I hit the big four-four (and the DH hit the big five-five a few days before -- we're in our elevenses), and I feel like I'm just barely hitting my stride. Anyone who'd sneer because there are a few body parts that jiggle isn't worth my time.

The Mr. X of my life used to tell me my thighs were fat because they spread out when I sat down. The boy just didn't understand anatomy (and quite a few other things) even when I explained it to him. The current DH couldn't be happier with the way I look -- even in the emergency room at the wee hours of the morning this last weekend (bad allergic reaction -- someone sneaked anchovies into my salad), with everything in disarray and electrodes all over me (and the poor guy sleeping on the floor because he didn't want to leave me alone there -- sniffle).

Yeah, there are still decent men out there.

Jann, thanks for the link to the video. It totally freaked out my cats.

35. Thirty-five is an excellent place to be. You're smart. You've been there. You know bullshit when you see it. You don't need to look like everyone else and you no longer belong to the "young and stupid" category. Thirty-five is the age I'd go back to and stay a while. EnJOY!

Damn fucking straight, sister!

My humps, my humps, my lovely lady lumps. What you gonna do with all that.....?
Yeah lets celebrate having a nice bot bot....
Mia

laurie, I just watched CSI over here on the east coast and let.me.tell.you. DO NOT MISS THE END OF THE SHOW. My mouth is still gaping open. best show on tv ever. wow.

Argh. Now I have "Baby's Got Back" stuck in my head. My roommate at the time the song came out loved the line "Red beans and rice didn't miss her." I was partial to the line "L.A. face with an Oakland booty."

As Zsa Zsa Gabor said, a woman reaches the age when she has to choose between her face and her fanny. I'm older than you are, and I was a happy size 14. With high blood pressure. So I lost the weight. And the blood pressure was genetic, dammit. I'm now a fashionable size 8 on blood pressure medication. And I have wrinkles I didn't have a year ago. Thin is highly overrated.

Can you stand another 35 year-old fat-ass? (or maybe smart-ass?)

I'm 5'6", 44-39-52. I figured, when you have hips like this, you better know how to shake them, so I started taking bellydance classes. It's a damn lot of fun - fat girls can shimmy waaay better than those skinny little things - the shimmy keeps going even after you stop ;0

And who can forget Dolly Parton in Steel Magnolias - I'm built for comfort, not speed (her junk was more front and center than around the back, but the sentiment is the same!)

Happy Birthday!!! have some more cake!

YOU GO GIRL!!!!

I just discovered your blog a few days ago, and have been reading and laughing. I'll be 38 at the end of July, and have always had a big butt. Over the last few years, with the extra pounds, I've suddenly (and finally) got the boobs to go with them. I've been so self-conscious while adjusting to my new figure. And this post, and all the comments, have made me feel SO much better!!! THANK YOU!!

It's me! The crazy sunglass girl from Ohio! Your b-day is the day before mine! I'll be 32. I'm part of the big butt and D cup club, too. We can have a drink (or bottle) of wine for each other on our b-days!

Why aren't you building a shrine? Build a SHRINE for goshsakes! Totally, build a shrine. you deserve it! Your booty deserves it!

and what a great craft project!!!

Hey ya'all need to drunk dial ..dial me

on yer b-day

916-410-6764
I'll keep ya in stitches fer hours

ROFLMAO over Brian.

Yes, yes, YES!!! Work it, own it, shake it when the mood strikes! Confidently curvy women are smokin' hot.

Laurie, you came up with this on the day I finally found my FAVORITE black pants that I wore all last summer and they LAUGHED at my efforts to fit into them onto my more-butt-than-last-summer body.

I was probably your age -- 10 years ag -- before I realized: Gosh, Guys kinda like a butt on a girl! OK, kinda REALLY!

I nominate "Hot Hot Hot" from the "Bend it like Beckham" soundtrack and Harry Belafonte's "Shake, shake, shake, Senora!" from the Beetlejuice soundtrack for your birthday tunes. Because if you GOT the booty, you might as well SHAKE the booty! Even -- especially -- while commuting!

You are soooo right !
Just live happily with your booty and without drunkdialing ! Happy 35th birthday, Laurie.

Excellent! Curves are good. Knitting is good. Worrying about either is seriously wrong. Maybe I'll go knit some bootypadding for the flat asses in my life.

Way to go my Hip Hop Sista. Time for us to love ourselves! So this birthday you'll "shake that ass" instead of your jazz hands. I think it's for the best.

Live proud! It's all about being happy, cause if you can't be happy with yourself, who's gonna do it for you? My birthday's just over a month away as well, I'll be 38!

One of the nicest things my now husband said when we were first messin' around in our early dating days was "you have such a nice ass." Made me love my tush--there are good guys out there with an appreciation of how a woman is supposed to look--and feel! Rock on with your bootylicious self!

I totally forgot about your drunken jazz hands. Awesome! And you go with your bumpalicious self! 35 will rock.

as one who has always been more than a little on the rubenesque side, even when I was bone thin I had the booty going on - and I tell ya, it's nice that our fine curves are finally being appreciated. You rock it girl, 35 will be your year!

Not only did Margaret Mitchell smoke and drink and wear pants when it was totally not thing thing to be done... She also scandalized the town by doing the freak nasty at her debutante ball, was courted by two men at once, chose one and married him then divorced him and married the other and SNUCK off to work in a time when women working outside the home was totally a no no! Especially good Southern women!

LOVE Margaret Mitchell! Really Laurie you should read one of her biographies... She's awesome!

What? No booty pictures? Harumph!

For your birthday tunes list, I offer this guy's top 10 booty songs:

http://glvcsports.org/ALESTLE/library/summer99/jun.30.99/top.html

I imagine there are other lists out there, as well.

FWIW, it's easier to get healthy and in shape when you're 35 than when you're 55, metabolisms being what they are and all. So embrace that booty! And if you're serious about getting healthy, don't wait 20 more years

I think what is important is that regardless of size of our butt, legs, stomach, length of legs, ugliness of feet, color of hair, wrinkles on face - whatever - that we learn to accept and love our bodies and ourselves. We are the look of women, not the supermodels and actresses who we emulate. We are real.

Love my Aunt Purl daily fix!

HEY GURL! Big Booty Sista right here in the house! I figure my booty is my best asset. :D There's always going to be someone to admire it so you might was well flaunt it. WORK IT GIRL!

In the bookstore today I came across a book about the artist who used to draw the old Plasticman comics. Seems he also drew for the girlie magazines in the 40's and onward. The soft-porn pix of full-bodied buxom women that were the fashion then would have warmed your li'l heart. Wasn't until the 60's that stick-thin came in, and it can go out any time, so far as I'm concerned.

Women should look like women, not like toothpicks.

Happy birthday - here's to 35 more years of rockin' the juicy booty!

P.S. I love your blog and read it every day.

Lordy, Girl!! We cannot forget Katherine the Great Hepburn!! She wore pants, smoked, drank,swore, had a sense of humor AND herself,fell in love with a married man and lived with him cause his wife wouldn't divorce him and......yes, doggone it---- KNITTED, too, by golly!! I just saw a picture of her sitting cross-legged with yarn and needles in hand! (Ya think Spence' liked knittin' women?!)

Now I'd be all better if BIGGY tee-sirt would just come back in the outside world, cause it's what I live in at home with my soft jammy pants!! I've got the tummy going on WITH the big ol' butt--I'm 56 years old, and you can bet, I have long since stopped worrying about it 24/7!! And darn it--I'll knit wherever I please, too!

You forgot Queen's "Fat-Bottomed Girls," which I adopted several years ago as a personal anthem. Who wants to grab onto a skinny girl anyway?

I have to echo Trudy's thoughts! Hepburn..a true role model for all women! Yeah, she was rail thin but, hey, she drank, she wore pants (well before they were in style!) she smoked, she cursed! She's been my role model for as long as I can remember. The only thing I don't do is knit! Sorry. I just enjoy this blog. And, I have a good butt! And, boobs that I'm proud of!! As always, rock on, Crazy Aunt Purl!

funny, at first when I read "Margaret Mitchell" I thought you meant "Margaret Mead" hehehehe...

love you! my heroine!
your fellow big-booty'ed cancerian,
riseyp

You may have been a bit young at the time. And it was only one song. But for '70s odes to the big booty (before the word 'booty' was used for it), you can't really beat Queen's Fat Bottomed Girls.

Congrats on accepting your own body and moving on.

Embarrassing but true... When ever I hear MM's name, the VERY FIRST thing that pops in my head is "she wore pants". Nothing about her writing. In fact, it took me a second who she was exactly and what she wrote.