April 26, 2006
The Bubbleheaded Bleached Blonde Comes On At Five
I was at a party recently with a room full of very educated adults, and we were doing what all Decent Income Earners with College Educations do at parties:
"If you had to pick ONE to sleep with, who would it be: Jennifer Aniston or Angelina Jolie?"
After wine and caryying on and time passes, the party disintegrates into: "Dr. Demento or Dr. Phil?" "Dr. Laura or George Bush?" "OH GOD" "Well, George Bush senior or junior? Because I would so do senior..."
And then we got to drugged-out celebrities, mostly because I was all, "Did ya'll SEE that picture of Brad Renfro busted for buying smack downtown? He was arrested next door to my old building!" as if I were the one on TV or something. By proxy. Because he was arrested in the alley outside my old building. I'm famous!
But that was when things went wrong, because I discovered there are actually humans out there who do not waste their valuable morning coffee time on gossip blogs.
"Who the hell is Brad Renfro?" asked Faith's husband Michael. And I could not help myself. "Oh my God, don't you read your gossip blogs? Don't you read Pink Is The New Blog? How ever do you manage to get through a whole day? I mean, really!"
Michael was maybe not amused.
But luckily this is Los Angeles and people here do keep up on their gossip. Well, some of them. Not Michael, obviously. Last night on the phone, after discussing the guy who cut his own toe off, Jennifer and I moved on to the next and most pressing subject: Denise and Richie. (!!!) Having just been through a nasty and prolonged divorce myself, I can understand and sympathize with anyone going through a nasty and prolonged divorce. Except, hi! Paparrazzi! Ya'll. Try to keep your panties on, ok? At least until you are actually divorced from your respective spouses.
I do try to balance out my rather embarrassingly high amount of celebrity gossip-blog-reading with a daily trip to nytimes.com, latimes.com and of course dailykos.com. Sprinkle in some knitting blogs and weather.com and you have a perfect day.
But sometimes there's just time for one blog. And I admit, it's Pink. Where else can I catch up on all my trashy goings-on and see shirtless Ryan Phillipe and laugh at K-Fed? I mean really.
(Oh, and in case you were wondering, no one wanted to sleep with Dr. Laura. I volunteered to do Dr. Phil, but only because he's so tall. Ya'll. Don't judge.)
Posted by laurie at April 26, 2006 9:57 AM