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April 26, 2006
The Bubbleheaded Bleached Blonde Comes On At Five
I was at a party recently with a room full of very educated adults, and we were doing what all Decent Income Earners with College Educations do at parties:
"If you had to pick ONE to sleep with, who would it be: Jennifer Aniston or Angelina Jolie?"
After wine and caryying on and time passes, the party disintegrates into: "Dr. Demento or Dr. Phil?" "Dr. Laura or George Bush?" "OH GOD" "Well, George Bush senior or junior? Because I would so do senior..."
Ya'll know.
And then we got to drugged-out celebrities, mostly because I was all, "Did ya'll SEE that picture of Brad Renfro busted for buying smack downtown? He was arrested next door to my old building!" as if I were the one on TV or something. By proxy. Because he was arrested in the alley outside my old building. I'm famous!
But that was when things went wrong, because I discovered there are actually humans out there who do not waste their valuable morning coffee time on gossip blogs.
"Who the hell is Brad Renfro?" asked Faith's husband Michael. And I could not help myself. "Oh my God, don't you read your gossip blogs? Don't you read Pink Is The New Blog? How ever do you manage to get through a whole day? I mean, really!"
Michael was maybe not amused.
But luckily this is Los Angeles and people here do keep up on their gossip. Well, some of them. Not Michael, obviously. Last night on the phone, after discussing the guy who cut his own toe off, Jennifer and I moved on to the next and most pressing subject: Denise and Richie. (!!!) Having just been through a nasty and prolonged divorce myself, I can understand and sympathize with anyone going through a nasty and prolonged divorce. Except, hi! Paparrazzi! Ya'll. Try to keep your panties on, ok? At least until you are actually divorced from your respective spouses.
I do try to balance out my rather embarrassingly high amount of celebrity gossip-blog-reading with a daily trip to nytimes.com, latimes.com and of course dailykos.com. Sprinkle in some knitting blogs and weather.com and you have a perfect day.
But sometimes there's just time for one blog. And I admit, it's Pink. Where else can I catch up on all my trashy goings-on and see shirtless Ryan Phillipe and laugh at K-Fed? I mean really.
(Oh, and in case you were wondering, no one wanted to sleep with Dr. Laura. I volunteered to do Dr. Phil, but only because he's so tall. Ya'll. Don't judge.)
Posted by laurie at April 26, 2006 09:57 AM
Comments
Ooh, first! My favorite gossip blog is The Superficial.
Posted by: Samantha at April 26, 2006 10:07 AM
A few of my daily's - (besides you of course)
http://www.dailyrotten.com/ = News/current events
http://cad.chp.ca.gov/ = rubberneck from the safety of your desk....
http://earthquake.usgs.gov/eqcenter/recenteqsus/Maps/US10/32.42.-125.-115.php = to assure myself that the tectonic plate specialists on the ole' San Andreas are really who they say they are....
Posted by: Brianne at April 26, 2006 10:08 AM
Thank a lot! Now I have even MORE blogs that I MUST read everyday when I should actually be working.
Posted by: Imaginarymaggie at April 26, 2006 10:11 AM
I had to Google Brad Renfro :( He's probably on one of those TV shows I don't watch because I don't have cable. Also, Britney is kinda gross. I realize she may think of herself as just a regular gal, but for the love of god, plus some clothes on your baby and some shoes on.
Posted by: Melissa at April 26, 2006 10:12 AM
Ah ha, someone else knows the lyrics to The Eagles songs! I would kill to see one of their concerts, well almost. Of course, I'd have to mortgage the house.
Posted by: Joan at April 26, 2006 10:14 AM
I love Pink is the New Blog.
I also check out:
I Don't Like You In That Way
(http://www.idontlikeyouinthatway.com/index.html)
and
The Superficial
{http://www.thesuperficial.com/)
on a regular basis as well.
What can I say? I love celebrity gossip.
Posted by: Helena at April 26, 2006 10:14 AM
thesuperficial.com and gofugyourself.com are the two sites i hit every morning while waiting for coffee to brew. then, dearabby.com. yeah, i'm lame.
Posted by: caroline m. at April 26, 2006 10:14 AM
oh. and defamer.com; can't forget them.
Posted by: caroline m. at April 26, 2006 10:15 AM
Another vote for The Superficial!
Posted by: mimsie at April 26, 2006 10:15 AM
Oh! so happy to see I am not the only coffee-time lowbrow out there LOL. Thank goodness!!
I like egotastic.com, too :)
Posted by: laurie at April 26, 2006 10:16 AM
Michael was amused...inside.
By the way, the link to me has to happen on the day that I'm talking about fatal mucus impaction? Really?
Posted by: Faith at April 26, 2006 10:18 AM
Yeah, I saw that, Faith. whoops. That's cool, though. Think of all the little snots you might attract...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Posted by: laurie at April 26, 2006 10:20 AM
I dig the egotastic, myself. www.egotastic.com. Also adore I Don't Like You In That Way, but somehow, it got put on the block list at work... Can't imagine why. Like the big ol' Angelina boob on the page. :)
Posted by: Lauren at April 26, 2006 10:25 AM
Lauren -- the superficial got banned by the firewall at my job, yet hollywoodtuna.com still gets through LOL.
Posted by: laurie at April 26, 2006 10:29 AM
Denise and Richie?! This is big news in my world! (Sadly.) So how am I supposed to concentrate on the quarterly investment report after hearing that?!
Posted by: Nancy at April 26, 2006 10:30 AM
Nancy!!! Denise and Heather used to be best friends (according to gossip blogs) (oh god, I am perpetrating the evil and vacuousness of the world, note to self: read Time Magazine cover to cover immediately) and suddenly Denise and Richuie are making out all over town, how's that!
Also, sometimes I wonder... if I did a straw poll at a local high school, you think more folks would know who K-Fed was than who the Vice President was?
Posted by: laurie at April 26, 2006 10:33 AM
At the high school DH teaches at, K-Fed would be there, Dick Cheney not so much. He did get some street when he shot that poor ol' lawyer
one I check everyday is about our local active volcano.
http://www.avo.alaska.edu/activity/Augustine.php
Posted by: Trixie at April 26, 2006 10:38 AM
I LIVE for gofugyourself.com. I just can't get enough of sarcastic comments about bad fashion. Plus I get the added side benefit of being able to channel the good ol' sorority days when we would sit around and slice-and-dice...ohh...pretty much everyone. Celebs, the girls from the house next door, the girls from the house up the row. Good times, good times.
Posted by: KJ at April 26, 2006 10:48 AM
I love, love, love PerezHilton.com so funny and so not safe for work. I also second gofugyourself.com I just found that site and I really wish they would post more.
Posted by: T. Rieder at April 26, 2006 10:51 AM
Sheesh. I thought everyone knew about that Brad Renfro thing. I'm partial to gofugyourself cuz nothing is better than celebrity gossip than celebrities in hideous outfits.
Posted by: Dagny at April 26, 2006 10:53 AM
Yay for reading Daily Kos! I'm also a sucker for Cute Overload (http://cuteoverload.com/), but who isn't? And how else would I catch up on all the TV that I pretend not to watch without going to Television Without Pity (http://www.televisionwithoutpity.com/)? Love the snark! Love it! :)
Posted by: Lufah at April 26, 2006 10:56 AM
You don't have to follow gossip to know this stuff. All you have to do is watch any of the LA newscasts. The Brad Renfro thing was all over the news, as is the Denise/Charlie divorce and the Denise/Richie/Heather triangle.
Britney Spears is white trash with money. And money can't buy class. Seriously, that poor boy has a tell-all book deal in his future.
Posted by: Laurie Ann at April 26, 2006 10:56 AM
Thanks for turning me on to Pink Is the New Blog weeks ago. My life has never been the same.
I'm waiting with baited breath for PITNB to comment on the words of confirmation from Britney's people that she's preggers again. She and I in the same week??!! I'm famous!
Posted by: Rachel at April 26, 2006 10:57 AM
Laurie,
I was *shocked* to see that Denise & Heather were such good friends. Poor Heather. I used to think poor Denise, but now methinks Denise is a Homewrecker. BoooHiss. It reminds me a bit of the Liz Taylor/Debbie Reynolds thing from way back when. Google that!
Oh this is just going to be rolling around my brain in this afternoon's booooring meeting.
Posted by: Nancy at April 26, 2006 10:57 AM
At least Dr. Phil has a sort of down-home appeal. Definately moreso than either of the George Bushes.
Posted by: Gina at April 26, 2006 11:01 AM
Sadly, I read ALL of the blogs listed above... and love them. Gofugyourself is the greatest! I tell myself that CNN.com and DailyKos balance them out, but really, they don't come close.
And Denise/Richie! Couldn't believe it! I went to a Bon Jovi concert just after they announced their separation and Bon Jovi shook Richie's hand on stage, like, a show of support or something, and then all this goes down! Crazy celebrities.
Posted by: Courtney at April 26, 2006 11:02 AM
Well, I was thinking... if you got Dr. Phil drunk enough, or maybe you could find someway to get him to just stop talking, I mean... he is really tall. And has big hands. You know.
You wouldn't do George Sr.? From back in the day? I mean, sure, he's no Bill Clinton, but ...
hehehehehehe
Posted by: laurie at April 26, 2006 11:03 AM
I love go fug yourself. Speaking of white trash with $, Brit is pregnant...again.
Posted by: Miss Wendy at April 26, 2006 11:04 AM
Take a look at http://pinksocksandsombrero.blogspot.com/. It's the Christina Aguilera of celebrity gossip blogs: slightly dirrrty, but fun nonetheless.
And I'd do Dr. Phil. Don't be ashamed.
Posted by: Robin at April 26, 2006 11:13 AM
ha -- this reminds me of when my brother moved from LA to Boston and realized that an entire party's worth of conversation about movies and celebrities was considered abnormal! He'd gotten so used to the LA vibe that he'd forgotten you could talk about other things.
I was at a friend's party in LA once and some guy brought his new 'head shots' and 1/2 the party dropped what they were doing to gather round the kitchen table to start at the tiny proof sheets. I didn't really get it.
Posted by: cant_talk_knitting at April 26, 2006 11:15 AM
DUDE. I just read your blog.
And all the comments.
That pretty much covers all my 'pooter time for the day.
Posted by: Monkeygurrl at April 26, 2006 11:21 AM
greeeaaaaat... just another way I have been assimilated to the los angeles borg LOL ....
Posted by: laurie at April 26, 2006 11:22 AM
I also love Pink is the New Blog! My other favorites are--
www.perezhilton.com www.richfamousandgross.blogspot.com
Posted by: Susannah at April 26, 2006 11:36 AM
www.defamer.com is my favorite gossip blog. I kind of feel a little sorry for Charlie Sheen. It looks like Denise decided to throw a bunch of dirt his way to try and deflect attention from the fact she was fooling around with her best friend's almost ex.
Posted by: Debbie at April 26, 2006 11:40 AM
Bwahahahaha...McTwin has forbidden me to show her any more blogs. She claims that the blogs I've already shown her eat too much of her time. But she loves you CAP, and Tomato Nation. I can easily spend a couple of hours just browsing through my flist on LJ and then checking out the other blogs on my must-read list (you're on the top of my list) before getting on to unimportant stuff, you know, like work.
Posted by: Bowen29 at April 26, 2006 11:43 AM
There is too much gossip and potential gossip at my work place. I just tell people that I prefer to gossip about celebrities than co-workers and friends...works every time!
Posted by: Sharon in AK at April 26, 2006 11:51 AM
Please. It's y'all. The apostrophe goes where the letter was left out, yk'now?
Posted by: bumzuko at April 26, 2006 11:56 AM
Just one URL: thegildedmoose.blogspot.com.
Posted by: Becca at April 26, 2006 11:58 AM
Dr. Phil? Please Laurie...come visit me and let me find you someone decent to sleep with. LOL! :)
I love
http://www.wwtdd.com
A co-worker got me hooked on this.
Posted by: Melissa at April 26, 2006 12:22 PM
Love "Pink is the New Blog". I'm a celebrity trash addict.
and No. I would not do Dr. Phil. He reminds me waaay too much of my Uncle Rick. Ewwwww.
Posted by: Reenie at April 26, 2006 12:26 PM
I noticed y'all got less fussy as the night went on. Was it the wine? Dr. Phil, Bush ....really :)
Posted by: spc at April 26, 2006 12:32 PM
OK, I have to admit 1) I have no clue who Brad Renfro, Denise and Richie are, and I've never watched Dr. Phil 2) my official position on gossip is that I am already hopelessly behind on my own business, thanks just the same. I can't help hoping that if we all obsessed less about celebrities' sex lives, certain subcultures would obsess less about EVERYBODY's sex lives (no, I really truly do not care if my daughter's teacher/ballet instructor/best friend's moms are gay), but that's probably foolish.
However, I would totally play that game, assuming that I knew who the celebrities were. I cannot offhand decide if Dr. Laura or W is more gross. Ewwwww.
Posted by: Lucia at April 26, 2006 12:37 PM
Weren't Heather Locklear and Charlie Sheen on "Spin City" together for a short time? It's all so icky.
Posted by: Kim in CT at April 26, 2006 12:44 PM
*sniffle*
ALL of the sites mentioned are BLOCKED at my workplace.
Good to know your children are protected from Angelina's boob...
Posted by: Shelly at April 26, 2006 01:00 PM
Kim, I totally forgot that. So true.
hehehe. I don't think any sites are blocked at my job.
Posted by: Dagny at April 26, 2006 01:33 PM
i *heart* dr. phil - i'd do him in a minute.
and i am SHOCKED, shocked i tell you to hear about denise and richie. is the heather locklear/david spade thing still goin' on? now HE'S creepy.
Posted by: April at April 26, 2006 01:41 PM
Swapping Celeb Spouses: The whole lot of 'em intermingle like baby rabbits.
Posted by: Reenie at April 26, 2006 01:55 PM
HEHEHE so it's not just me reading Pink and I also read PerezHilton and Socialitelife.
I use them to supplement my People magazine addiction ;)
Posted by: Anne at April 26, 2006 02:02 PM
Guess it depends on which "a" you want to leave out. Ya all
Double YUCK to GWs. But I'd do Bill.
Not Phil, I'm sure he would yell at me. He scares me.
Celebrity Gossip: Zzzzzzzzzz......
Posted by: psychomom at April 26, 2006 02:02 PM
Oops!
GW = GB
Posted by: psychomom at April 26, 2006 02:06 PM
Haven't seen it mentioned here, but another fave site for gossip is thebosh.com
Posted by: Dagny at April 26, 2006 02:07 PM
I think I'm the only one who clicked on comments to talk about my cats! Ah well.
Laurie - wanted you to know that you're not the only one who talks to the kitties & expects responses! Andy is part Siamese, so frankly, he has many opinions to share.
But one hazard of talking to one's cats - we talked to our daughter in the same way after she was born, only one day she ANSWERED. Totally freaked us out - it was like hearing the cats talk!
And, um, now you know why my college nickname was non sequitor. Also, I can't spell & my back hurts too much to spellcheck. Um, because spellchecking takes a lot of back strength?
Posted by: suzanne at April 26, 2006 02:18 PM
No cat pictures lately, Laurie? it's been like, a week! I miss the little fuzzbuckets.
Still sending good, bacony thoughts out to Roy.
Posted by: Carrie at April 26, 2006 02:29 PM
I'm with Lucia -- who the heck are you talking about? LOL
On a much more important topic - knitting - have you seen these lite up knitting needles? I'm pretty much a circular needle person but these things are wild and I can see their being really handy for knitting in the car (as a passenger) or at night in bed so I wouldn't disturb the hub... If you try them, Laurie, please let us know what you think, ok??
p.s. I'm on the east coast and have no affiliation - I just think it's a really neat idea.
http://www.laknitterieparisienne.com/Knit_Lite.html
Posted by: Leslie at April 26, 2006 02:29 PM
I love that once again someone points out my unique little spelling of the word ya'll but ignores the 367 actual typos in my column. Such as : caryying, didentigrates, discusing, and also don't forget the fine way I typed in paparazzi.
hehehehehehehe
Posted by: laurie at April 26, 2006 03:45 PM
My husband thinks it's a riot: I only read knitting blogs. No celebrity gossip or political rants for me - show me the yarn! I read Laurie here :), and Wendy, and Susan at I'm Knitting as Fast as I Can, and Steph at Six Skeins Under, and Anmiryam at Gromit Knits.
I like Dr Phil, but not THAT much, y'all. :)
Posted by: Julie at April 26, 2006 04:21 PM
Ooh, I haven't come across Pink before - thanks!
Posted by: Peeve at April 26, 2006 05:59 PM
I LOVE Pink is the New Blog! I gotta get my Tomkat, Brangelina, and Spederline updates!
:)
Posted by: Janet at April 26, 2006 06:01 PM
i'll take dr laura, but only if i get to beat her face in with a shovel. that woman irritates me.
Posted by: minnie at April 26, 2006 06:38 PM
What if G Bush slept with Dr Laura while Dr Phil talked about it???
Throw in some OCD knitting and it doesn't leave much time for work does it?
Posted by: haji-inna-coma at April 26, 2006 06:58 PM
another vote for thesuperficial.com here!
Posted by: Brandy at April 26, 2006 09:06 PM
Thank you for the link to Pink! I love it.
Posted by: ShelbyD at April 26, 2006 09:37 PM
When do you have time to do laundry, get to the dry cleaner, pick up prescriptions, take out the garbage, call the landscaper, feed the cats, shave legs, call your mother, etc? I must be doing something wrong cuz Im missing too much blog reading.
Posted by: Purl Needlemeyer at April 26, 2006 10:11 PM
Ok, so I am not into celebrity gossip but that naked Ryan P comment got me to this sight and now I am hooked!
Thanks! ;0)
Posted by: Laura at April 27, 2006 12:57 AM
I am into the celebrity gossip too.. but cannot stand Tom Cruise...love the Brangelina thing...I liked the elder Geo. Bush too... and Al Gore was a hottie when he was young... Dr. Phil nice and tall, but he talks WAY too much, would probably analyze it... KFed, what a moron... Someone mentioned Eliz Taylor/Richard Burton -- if you want to see an electric sexual attraction between two actors rent TAMING OF THE SHREW sometime, you can just see how hot they were for each other....
hugs to you and the cats!
Posted by: Cheryl at April 27, 2006 05:11 AM
It is quite remarkable what can be done with a piece of string (any length!) and some purple heart chewing gum. The only difference is in the amount of secondary recoil and who cares about that. Not me!
Posted by: bonzo the tap dancing chimp at April 27, 2006 05:49 AM
Parties in LA are much more interesting than parties in London. You get a buncha educated people here together and what do they talk about? House prices. C'mon, people. If I want to talk real estate, I'll call an estate agent.
Posted by: martigny at April 27, 2006 05:57 AM
Hey check out http://bricksandstones.blogspot.com
It's easier to read than the Pink. Less Pink, less black.. same photos...
And Laurie when you see bumper stickers that say "Screw Bush" that doesn't mean they want to SLEEP with him!
Posted by: Stacey at April 27, 2006 06:03 AM
I thought "southern democrat" was an oxy-moron...
Posted by: butterfly at April 27, 2006 08:06 AM
It just occured to me, those of us who are not keeping up with the Pitts, Simpsons, etc, are keeping up with one of our favorite stars, CAP.
Posted by: James at April 27, 2006 04:15 PM
Oh, for all your gossip needs IN ONE PLACE (including most of those mentioned above!) go to: www.wesmirch.com -- it's an aggregator (not agitator, although some people might be bothered) for gossip sites!
Posted by: katia at April 28, 2006 05:52 AM
Defamer is great but you have to check out royalnobody.blogspot.com
Posted by: jen in nyc at May 30, 2006 11:14 AM







