FIRST TO POST! Happy New Year, Laurie!

Okay, I don't share your idiosyncracy when it comes to germs (I'm of the exposure-will-strengthen-your-immune-system school). But my own idiosyncracy has lead me to a discovery that may improve your life: keeping earplugs with you at all times will allow you to maintain sanity in an urban environment. Really. Someone is blabbing away on the cell phone while you're trying to read on the bus? Earplugs. Someone is explaining who Rubens was to his 2-year-old while you're trying to commune with art (and yes, this happened to me at a local museum)? Earplugs. Bus gets stoppeed in traffic right next to construction? Earplugs. I love my earplugs. Get some, and have to move less frequently on the bus.

That's so funny--I do the survivor size-up too! Heck, I used to travel with a small survival kit strapped to me in a fanny pack (which now does not include my knife but is in my purse with the strap around my ankle--just in case).

We're not weird, are we?

I am sorry you had such a germ filled bus ride. My office has been child central this week. Tuesday a 6 year old who likes to touch EVERYTHING on EVERYONES desk after being at school with other kids and germs. Yesterday, the 1 month old baby who's diaper had to be changed IN THE LOBBY and today the two children of the boss who are writing with my pens, drinking from the fountain with the mouth ALL over the metal. Wow, nothing is safe here. I am going to wash my hands also. Good luck keeping well!!

Boy, crazy really does know crazy, don't it?! I'm sure you're suitibly armored against OMGs - after all, when you have red wine running through your veins, you can withstand ANYTHING.

And you better have two of those snickers. "Fun" size my arse.

Fun size Purell for all your purses. No need to wait until you get into the office to de-germ.

I heart my Bose noise cancelling headphones -- especially if I am listening to a book or music, they really shut out the noise. I won't wear them on the street because I am paranoid that I won't hear a car or bicycle hurtling towards me uncontrollably -- or even a crazy person getting too close.

I have noice cancelling headphones, but Loud Talker and her friend are SO loud, you can actually hear them through the headphones. I kid you not.

(As my 5 yr old hacks on me again)I love Purell.

You could always do a Crazy Lady act - calling your knitting needles by name, chastising your yarn, laughing maniacally at inappropriate moments, whispering to an invisible companion while darting your eyes around in a parnoid manner - in an effort to make everyone else avoid you. Then you could pick a seat and stick with it and still be left in a quiet, relatively germ-free zone.

Okay, just reading about the germ shower from the sneezy, drippy old man has made me not only want to wash MY hands ... but to shower as well. Icky (*shudder*).

Did you not see the study saying that you need at least one cold a year (or maybe two) to build up your immune system so it can fight off really, really nasty things? (No, I do not mean bushy eyebrows.) In New England we believe this. Of course we have little choice, since everyone gets sick 10 minutes after it gets cold out.

My boss just canceled our weekly staff meeting to avoid giving us his cold. Maybe I should ask him to reconsider...

I am SO with you on this! I commute on a city bus and there is NO END to the sneezing and coughing and old people (not just men) germs. Or small child germs. I once observed a small child on the bus LICKING THE METAL POLE that people hold on to! LICKING it!!! I almost had an anxiety attack right there. And the survivor size-up? None of the people I ride with look like survivors to me, so I try to make sure that I always sit on the right-hand side of the bus. Since my bus makes only left-hand turns, if we should crash and roll I figure I'll be on the top side and closest to an escape route. And yes, I know how to work those emergency window exits!

the Crazy Lady act works. one year, about a million years ago when i was working the hosiery counter at the Needless Markup in SF, a woman was busy talking to herself being crazy whilst browsing through the panty hose. i left her alone; i mean, wouldnt you? when she finally came up to the counter and read my name off of my name tag (out loud, she did), she said, "Hey! i know you!". turns out i went to junior high with her way back in the day.

there was a point to this story...

I too am with you on the germ thing. On my morning bus commute, the driver's side of the bus has this strange heated air thing that blows on you. You can bet I'm not sitting on that side....recycled freak air...*mumble,mumble*.....

As a result of grad school I have been blessed with a nice internal tune out switch. I can tune out anything. Of course it does have it's draw backs. I'm pretty easy to sneak up on (my boss does it all the time) and I've been know to tune out important things like conversations I'm suppose to be part of and train stops. Nothing like having to get off the train and catch the next one back two miles.

We in Florida shudder ... PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION?!

As in: Ride in a vehicle with STRANGERS?

Heck, we don't even like to ride in cars with family members. If we could fly our own planes, believe me, we would ..

What's this "bus" thing you speak of? ... Oh yeah, that long shiny thing with wheels full of homeless people and guys who lost their driver's license.

sheesh.

I think I would have stared at him with wide eyes and a touch of fear until he moved away from me. Why should I have to move? I do this to People That Talk Too Loudly on their cell phones and the people next to them. Also to People That Invade My Personal Space in lines.

Try it. It just might work.

:) Happy Thursday!

I'm with Hurricane Chase...PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION?! EEWWWW! Quick!! Take some Airborne!! Repeat every 3 hours!!

Eww. The old guy wasn't even covering his mouth when he sneezed? I mean, come on, that's just common curtesy. Ew.

One of your best posts yet. Hilarious. Thanks for the afternoon chuckle.

Had to de-lurk for two reasons:
1. I'm jealous that your kitties have formed togetherness while sleeping! I'm hoping my resident cat will adopt a "sleeping buddies" bond with her new brother, THE KITTEN!

2. Public transportation: In my area, I have compared the public transportation system to the different modes of air travel.

The Regional Rail = First class travel. More expensive, more convenient, quiet, roomy, comfy seats and, on a clean scale of 1-5, a 4.5.

The suburban bus or trolley = coach. Noisier, more cramped, runs more frequently but not as direct; clean scale, 2.5 - 3.

The urban elevated train = cargo hold or maybe the space where the landing gear is kept. Smelly, noisy, trash is rampant, despite trash cans located at EVERY STATION!, obnoxious, loud and foul-mouthed youths; clean scale, 0 - 0.5.

I've had two bad colds so far this year, and I'll swear I got them both on Public Transportation, despite gloves and scarves protecting me! One more and I start WALKING!

Please give your wonderful kitties a pet from me!
Enjoy the weather that's not hovering around freezing!

I'm not too bad about germs, but I would not be able to handle all the -people- on public transportation. Add one part social phobia and one part claustrophobia, with a healthy dash of misanthropy...yeah. Me on a bus would be bad.

I like that word flummoxed, it shows you're from the south. I'm going to start writing down words I like and words I hate. I hate erroneous. Just means a big fat lie.

The "survivor" element....I never knew there was a name for it, but I am totally with you on it!! And you can totally pick those people out. You gotta have the gusto in case the $h!t goes down:)

I almost think I would prefer Old Man Germs to the Dead Man Cooties I caught last month--one of the perils of working in a hospital (even when one works at the administrative level) is sometimes there is absolutely no way to avoid walking past the morgue. And occasionally these sneaky Funeral Home Men lurk around corners, just waiting to ram one with a dead man on a stretcher.
Yep, that would be my life. It took many handwashings, Lysol spray-downs, and 2 bubble baths to recover from that.

Oh! Laura! I want to participate in the word-writing-down thing!
Today I told someone I was about to pitch a hissy and they stared at me. BLANK STARE. Go figure.

re: the crazy lady angle... Heh, now that ya'll mention it, when I was knitting the transvestite muppet scarf, I was left well alone ;)

My very scientific theory is that the germs stay in a holding pattern for like, 24 hours, and tonight, you should have some wine, the alcohol will kill them if all the handwashing hasn't already.

If not, I look forward to buying you a nose-hair clipper for your birthday.

Oh, ick. And double-ick. And another ick thrown in.

I also believe in the healing powers of coffee, and you now have me craving the Snickers bar in my desk.

I hope you don't turn into a grouchy old curmudgeon, too. Definitely wash the hands again. LOL

Maybe your bus knitting should be done on scary-huge metal needles.

Fun size Purelle is great! They even make ones that fit right on your keychain.

Yikes. Reminds me of living in Santa Cruz (fun to visit, not fun to live there). The bus is the most popular and practical way to get around...parking is a huge issue, and all of the U.C. students have a bus pass included in their tuition (there is very little parking on campus). Now, Santa Cruz is one of the last bastions of the '60's...and a lot of folks there seem to have, um, strong beliefs about bathing regularly - as in, they don't. The bus rides on the warm days were...fragrant...

I sort of do the survivor thing but more often I do the accomplice thing. I try to stay away from the person on the bus, train or plane who I think is most likely to act in a way that will make people think they are a terrorist so that I won't be arrested or shot by mistake by someone who assumes I am their accomplice.

City buses are bad agreed. Try a cross country greyhound. That my friend is a rolling sewer. Plus they stop at every god awful town. In the best areas at that. Once (only once) I took the bus from Texas to South Carolina. 27 hours on the thing with the most vile creatures ever to crawl out of the wood work. By car it takes 13 hours. I did this dumb move because my mother did not want me to ride my motorcycle. ( I had ridden 12,000 miles in a year and half) One reason I don't willing talk to the family.

Oh, and the cats are wicked cute today.

"persnickity"
added to my list as a favorite

"ax" (instead of ask)
huge pet peeve! want to smack people when hearing this

will be using the "survivor element" in the future

Quick note: (really quick cause i am at work and am going to get fired for all this blog reading) Just started reading your blog and I.AM.HOOKED! Thanks for sharing with us!

Hehehehehe, I've an idea. Why don't you knit him a mask in shocking pink? *LOL*

I think it's perfectly valid to have germ issues. I once had a coworker who would not cover her mouth when sneezing. As a matter of fact she suffered from sneezing fits of 8 or 9 or more sneezes in a row. As she sneezed she would turn from side to side so that she covered every square inch of the room. God help you when she had a cold.

Awwww, kitty pictures...so sweet.

I have a co-worker who blows her nose while talking to me. It is disgusting. I wish I had the guts to say "go to the bathroom and blow your damn nose...I don't want to hear it." But I don't.

I would be like you with the germy old man on the bus.
Suffering in silence.

Maybe in 2006 I can learn to be more assertive.
Is that okay?

I totally get the germphobia thing. I teach sixth grade, and it is a breeding ground for all sorts of foulness. These kids, they sneeze in their hands and then immediately borrow their neighbor's pencil. I wish I could set up one of those decontamination sprayers to run continuously over the door to my classroom. I think I go through a gallon of Purell and about 5 rolls of Chlorox wipes each week as it is.

That was so funny. Thank you.

I started knitting because of you and your blog. I have made one bad hat, two good hats and two scarves.

Love your cats. Bob and Frankie are my favorites. In fact, Frankie does not get enough press, in my humble opinion. More Frankie, please!

Kudos to DebR and her Crazy Lady idea.

I live in a "city" of about 2000 people and we have a "bus" that is only 20 feet long. It's called the Interurban, and it runs for free on New Years Eve. A bunch of friends and I actually called them up for the first time in the 30 something years that it's been running and took it to town and back that night. Fun on the way there, and HYSTERICAL on the way home!

But I imagine that it's a little different than taking a bus in LA LA land.

Ah the Interurban... fun times. Did I ever tell you that in High School I had daydreams of driving the Interurban?

Fireflies.

You're a very funny woman.....I agree with DebR as well. Must shower with antibacterial stuff. I got this way from working in the medical field and being hit with the shocking fact, one icky day, that smell is primarily a particulate thingy(tech term, hehheh). Anyway there are some things that only a Snickers can solve. It was the best you could do with what you had! Verrry funny stuff.That dope you divorced must be missing a link or two. I will lurk no more forever, Dee

I love the "survivor" theory. I am a licensed commercial pilot, and I can't tell you how many times I think that I'm going to have to trample the person in the emergency row because they are clearly not the type to keep their cool in an emergency. In fact, I was next to the emergency exit once, and this guy in the middle seat said, (after our brief on emergency procedures) "don't worry little lady, I'll help you with that door if it comes to that." As if! Stand back because you're getting trampled if you get between me and that door! :P

Just when I thought I was alone on planet earth with my weird thoughts..you speak them into life...
lol
Hi! (reaches forward to shake your hand) Im a survivor! Nice to meet you!
;0)
Thanks for the giggles girl...
Moon

I love snickers (the name says it all) but "fun size" is not that fun, IMHO.

Also, someone is copying your blog again, and this girl even stole your title:

http://www.collegechick.net/index.php

Hi, Laurie. Hope you come to S'n'B tonight. I missed it last week.

Oh, you have some of the very best stories. Thank you, thank you for sharing. I really hope you didn't get any of grumpy's germs.

I work at the library. We get sticky books. We like getting damp books on a dry day. We have soap. Hot water. Lysol spray. Saltines for the nausea. And the four year olds sneeze all over us. ICK!!!! The homeless spend the day at the library--I don't look for survivors--I look for potential serial killers. We got a hint for fragrant bus rides when we visited Russia in the spring of 88--vicks vapo rub just a dab under your nose. Smell free.

I totally sympathize with you on the germ front. I work in a public library and people just don't give a damn *what* they cover their books with before they give them back. Shudder.

Got a bushy eyebrow story for you: My Dad (who has normal-size eyebrows and was only 50 when this story happened) somehow got a single eyebrow hair brushed back into his top-of-head hair and it GREW and FLOURISHED and became as one with the head hair. Took him about 3 months to figure it out. Totally freaked himself out when he did--visions of his grandfather's bushy eyebrows.

Cheers!

The survivor element makes total sense especially in LA. I mean if those made for TV movies about earthquakes, storms, or volcanos are anything to go by, most of LA will be screwed in a major disaster. Surrounding yourself with survivors is your only chance.

I too practice survivor profiling. I also check for disaster causers. I tend to spec out any apartment complex I've lived in for the neighbors most likely to start a fire and thus burn my apartment and possesions to a cinder. My suspicions proved true when a crazy former neighbor burned down her kitchen (which shared a wall with our old unit) two weeks after we had moved away. She was the highest ranked disaster causer I've ever lived near.

I'm very suspicious of disaster causers. I fear my newest neighbor is both a non-survivor and a disaster causer...

The fact that you looked for other survivors like yourself, will in fact guarantee that you will live through the stepping over on others when the panic ensues. Frankly I believe that you took the appropriate action in getting to work and de-cootying with antibacterial soap, and of course using the well recognized combination of caffeine and snickers. One needs all the defenses that one can gather around oneself. Great job - you do not need the services of a therapist, as you have a firm grip on what is needed in this situation.

Do you have specific criteria for determining who might be a survivor or a non-survivor? Even snap-decision quick criteria? If so, would you be willing to share? Inquiring minds want to know...

danielle: I think the survivor thing is a gut reaction, I'll have to try to come up with some quick criteria, though. I can see where that will come in handy especially when I travel with friends. they need to know how to also spot survivors ;)

snickersbeth: why do people do that???

Copying is stealing. Stealing is bad.

What's that line..."immitation is the sincerest form of flattery"...only, well, it's sad that this chick's been webbing (or so her site says) for 8 years and writing is maybe not her forte?

I'm all about first-aid packs and "just in case emergency stuff" in my bag. My friends rely on my for this stuff now. Headache? Mary has advil. Cut yourself? Mary has band-aids. Euwww what did I just touch? Mary has mini-Purell. Starving? I betcha there's a Luna Bar in that bag...What can I say? I lived in Mexico out of a Sailboat for 2 years.

I had a 2+ hour commute from East LA to West LA every day, each way. What fun it was to see how the clientelle changed from one end of the city to the other...eep.

Laurie, Here's a comment I just left at the "college chick's" blog. I hate thieves.

"As a "college chick", you should know that plagiarism is a serious offence, both from a moral and a legal perspective. You should also know that a number of people are aware of the fact that this blog entry was plagiarized from Crazy Aunt Purl's blog. If you don't have time to blog, then don't do it. Stealing from others is just shabby."

Dang, Purl! I just checked out that collegechick's site. SUCKS that she totally stole your post, and then changed a few things. Don't they still prohibit plagiarizing in college? (It's been a few years, maybe things have changed. . . drastically.) I tried leaving a nasty comment, but the site wouldn't take it. Figures. Stupid worm. I hope she flunks all her classes.

Isn't it weird? I'll never understand people.

I'm a survivor. I do the same thing on the bus and trains, or I used to before I got a car. And on a plane, I count the seats between me and the exit, and analyze who's going to be my greatest obstacle to get there. You're not alone, girl.

Old man germs are worse than normal germs because old men still use the cloth hankerchiefs, which they stuff in their pockets after sneezing or wiping their bulbous (there's a good word) noses on them. These germ rodeos stay in that pocket for God knows how long, with the old man's hands going in and out of said pocket God knows how many times, until Sneezy McGrouchy is virtually crawling with germs. (aren't you glad germs aren't visible to the naked eye?)

1st of all - i haven't commented or introduced myself before, but i recently started stalking you, Laurie...well, your blog at least...I'm a little far away for actual stalking. I sent the link for your blog to my stepmom and told her I was in love with you...er...um...(that doesn't translate so well from spanish:-) )...not really in THAT way...but I love your blog, and how you seem to put perfectly into words some of the random things that go on in my head. I am sure that you are MY long lost crazy Aunt Purl...hmmmm, wishful thinking!:-) Anyway, couldn't pass up replying today...

about the germs...I work in a hospital - spent half the week in the pediatric clinic - 90% of the cute little rugrats in my city have the CRUD (horrible sore throat, etc, virus) - you can actually FEEL the germs start to crawl on you upon entering the clinic....Purell baths are starting to be a daily ritual....

Last but not least - I am absolutely "flummoxed" (yes, i am quoting Laurie, and overly citing my source in the interest of NONplagiarism) anyway, I'm "flummoxed" by the fact that someone would actually STEAL an entire blog entry and post it as their own...I have no words..........
(funny that the comments are hidden on that college chick's entry......yours was great Mary)

I'm off to drive home - alone, with no grumpy old men or loud talkers, just one crazy girl (me) in my own little car to bathe in Purell (and finish my magic scarf, of which i must take a picture to send you) ....and to think I was almost jealous of bus-knitting.........

Not to make any of us any more anxious, but I heard recently (darn if I can remember where) that Purell and its ilk don't kill rotavirus germs -- the ones that make you puke -- yikes. Can anyone confirm?

About the whole hating word thing. I have a boyfriend that corrects me when I'm explaining stuff. I hate that worse than anything! You know what I'm talking about so why interrupt my story and correct me?

Hah! The one thing I like about winter in Maryland is that I can wear my gloves and therefore don't have to touch anything on the bus with my bare hands! In the summer, I squirt my paws with Purell, even if I've managed to avoid skin-to-bus contact...just in case.

Yeah, I'm a bit on the OCD side too.... :)

dude. your site still does not compare to mine for insanity. but it is way cooler in other ways. besides, you're not a member of the gutknecht clan, the craziest monkeys on the planet, so you can't be blamed.

trade me families? PLEEEEEEEZE?! ANYONE!!!

CRAP. anyway.

wow. what WAS i talking about?

anyway, it's a GREAT season to wash. you don't want to EVEN see the funk going around in tex-ASS (you're right, a native would never refer to this particular state like so. but that's okay, it's make me thoroughly nuts nonetheless. have you seen the film EULOGY? WATCH IT. You'll gain some of my perspective. love ya.)

Cheerio.
April

PS. Don't live in europe, this is what it DOES to you.

hellllooooooo ..

dude. your site still does not compare to mine for insanity. but it is way cooler in other ways. besides, you're not a member of the gutknecht clan, the craziest monkeys on the planet, so you can't be blamed.

trade me families? PLEEEEEEEZE?! ANYONE!!!

CRAP. anyway.

wow. what WAS i talking about?

anyway, it's a GREAT season to wash. you don't want to EVEN see the funk going around in tex-ASS (you're right, a native would never refer to this particular state like so. but that's okay, it's make me thoroughly nuts nonetheless. have you seen the film EULOGY? WATCH IT. You'll gain some of my perspective. love ya.)

Cheerio.
April

PS. Don't live in europe, this is what it DOES to you.

hellllooooooo ..

The college chick apparently knows how to use her "delete comments" and "lock journal" functions as well.

Crazy internets... it makes all the stupid people feel special.

i'm so totally blog-stalking you! i post pictures of myself and myself wearing my knitted goods and stuffed gorillas wearing my knitted goods, and pictures of my 2 year old's naked butt in my journal. stop by sometime! :)

This is counter-intuitive but true. You want to be stranded with NON SURVIVOR types. Cause the stronger survivor types will take from you. Survivor types do not share during an emergency. You want to be surrounded by weak people and take from them.

The the nearest fun sized snickers is about 3,000 miles away from here. It's yours...and I coming to get it!!!!

I just went and chewed out college chick too. Of course, my comment isn't displayed, but I hope that she reads it and feels properly shamed.

I was gonna write some snotty comment about how those of us in Southern California don't ride the bus, so we don't have to put up with that stuff, but first I thought I'd take a peak at your bio - I'm glad i checked first! Anyway, I just started reading your blog recently (got the link from someone else) and I've really enjoyed it. Hope the Purell works - and if not, just get some sunshine on your lunchbreak tomorrow - except since it was 86 here in "OC" today, I guess it might be too hot to do that in LA. Take care.

But Laurie, your bus looked so nice and clean in the picture of happy hat lady the other day. You want to travel on public transport in Britain for the full smell-o-rama/germ-soup thing. Our buses are filthy, and cramped, and always contain at least one of the following group; the great unwashed, an alcoholic, a sticky child, an old lady who smells of wee, a cougher, a sneezer. Some days you can collect the whole set. In triplicate. And don't even think about opening a window, I did that one time and this crazy woman thumped me on the head and started screaming at me. And the nicotine deprived can get pretty antsy on a bus in the morining, so don't even look at anyone funny.

Maybe I'm just on a bad bus route, we never get the newest buses, we get the beat up old wrecks, to go with the diseased and depressed travellers.

Some places have nice buses, and fancy trams, and such finery, but I do feel like a kid on a Sunday school outing when I get on one of those.

That makes me sooooo mad!!!! Why can't people formulate their own blog??? LAME-O!! Oh yeah go get cha some Airborne asap. I took it when I felt like I was getting sick and it totally wiped it out!!! I loves me some airborne!!!! I went and bought a second one just to have on hand. While we're at it, why does Holly wood feel the need to copy old TV shows into movies?????? Again.... come up with an original idea !!!!!
Nothin makes my ass chew gum more than people who cant form their own thoughts/ideas!!(blogs!!)
Kitties are just too cute....was that considered a threesome?? and where's Frankie?? oh yeah .....Ax instead of ASK makes my head come clean off........

1 vitamin C, 1 zinc, and a fine Belgian Lambic (it's higher-proof beer, with JUICE!) to wash it down should do the trick. I don't think I would try that so early in the morning, though, or at a bus stop.

OMG, that just blows me away that someone stole your entire "List" post and re-posted like it was her own - no author credit, no link-back, no nuttin'!!! I just SO don't understand people like that. Who on earth does she think she's impressing??

That "college chick" is racking up shitty karma, I guarantee it. I tried to post a nasty comment to her website but I couldn't.

Anyhoo, hope you don't get sick. Take Zicam and Emergen-C and drink lots of tea. Get sleep and hug the kitties. Stay well, we need more CAP! :)

Back in the day, hospitals use to have a "personal" size of Lysol spray, small can that could fit in a relatively medium sized purse.

THOSE cans should be made again, because then you could spray creepy old "Uncle Fungus" like the cockroach he is...of germs that is.

I would've had no trouble spraying him down or the air around me & would bet anyone who saw you would kick themselves for not being as smart.

Good luck on your next ride, they only make "family sized" cans these days... Oh, and by the way, the best thing for oncoming colds/viruses is to go to the health food store & get LIQUID bee pollen extract (NO DRY FORMS)

Just 2 droppers of that stuff down the back of the throat (allow to slowly trickle down) if you're starting to get that lil tickle in the throat. It is vital you do this at the BEGINNING of the sniffles/tickle stage of being under the weather & this will blow it completely out of the water.

Unless, you may be allergic to bees and/or you are surrounded/come in contact with multiple "sickies".

Back in the day, hospitals use to have a "personal" size of Lysol spray, small can that could fit in a relatively medium sized purse.

THOSE cans should be made again, because then you could spray creepy old "Uncle Fungus" like the cockroach he is...of germs that is.

I would've had no trouble spraying him down or the air around me & would bet anyone who saw you would kick themselves for not being as smart.

Good luck on your next ride, they only make "family sized" cans these days... Oh, and by the way, the best thing for oncoming colds/viruses is to go to the health food store & get LIQUID bee pollen extract (NO DRY FORMS)

Just 2 droppers of that stuff down the back of the throat (allow to slowly trickle down) if you're starting to get that lil tickle in the throat. It is vital you do this at the BEGINNING of the sniffles/tickle stage of being under the weather & this will blow it completely out of the water.

Unless, you may be allergic to bees and/or you are surrounded/come in contact with multiple "sickies".

Your comment on my blog gave me a good laugh. Good thing I wasn't drinking anything.

That survivor thing...too funny. While I was in school, my roommate and I would avoid studying by watching a lot of movies... in particular, horror movies. We'd always play the "When Would I Get Killed Off?" game. She always had me pegged as the girl who falls down and tries to crawl backwards from the guy with the knife/axe/chainsaw. I'm guessing I'd fail the 'survivor' test...

Hey Laurie,
I have been stalking your blog since Novemberish, now I start my working day with a cafe latte and a read of your latest post (except now its January I have given up coffee for a month and as I have a cold - caught while in freezing Amsterdam over Christmas - I am now drinking Lemsip blackcurrant and reading your blog). Sorry to see that you have been so blatantly plaguerised by "college chick", imitation may well be the sincerest form of flattery but I do hope she isn't an English major as she is obviously unaware that her writing style is so blatantly different to yours, even if I did not know the origin of the original list it is so clear that she did not write the majority of that post herself.

As this is my first comment I would also like to say thank you for your easy to follow drop and loop stich tutorials with added cat pictures from last year, I have made a number of scarves with these stiches and even though I only learnt to knit in November they do look rather good.

For good measure here is my list of words I HATE -
armpit
mucus
probe
- these literally make me feel sick.

Happy New Year !

Zoe

When I get on a plane, I calculate the daytime TV movie factor. I count the pregnant women and babies. In any good based on real events TV movie about a plane crash there has to be a pregant woman, or one who just announced she is pregnant to her husband (and she'll die), not too many babies (and they will miraculously survive for the most part or just won't be talked about), someone who is really excited to finally be going home and a plucky flight attendant. If my flight attendant isn't surly, I get worried.

Thank you for preparing me for my ride on BART tonight. If I'm lucky, I'll get a seat to myself.

I now live in a town so small it doesn't have public transit, and I don't miss it all! Just thinking about how many sweaty bums have been sitting on those awful plastic seats makes me want to retch! ("retch" = good word, not good experience!)

Also really like the word "turquoise" - and "bubbles", and "coincidence" - but not the words "panty" or "belly" for some reason - I never refer to underwear as panties, it just sounds wrong. Does that make me crazy?

interesting. i tried to post on college chix's blog and it wouldn't take my comment either.

Ok, I don't know if someone already answered this but Purell and all other hand sanitizers only kill bacteria. They cannot kill viruses. They will help you keep your immune system healthy by killing bacteria that could give you an infection, which will in turn make you less likely to have a problem fighting off a virus, but that is all. Anitbiotics only kill bacteria, the flu and colds are virus.

Also: I am absolutely not a survivor. I know this about myself, and it is strangely liberating. I make an attempt to not block the emergency exit row and thus prevent everyone else from surviving, but yeah, I'm toast and I know it.

I also tried to comment on collegechick's blog (did you read the part that states that she chose that name b/c it makes it sound like a porn site?!), but it didn't show up. Figures. And she is hoping to graduate with "honors"? Maybe she should research the meaning of honor.

Many doctors blame the new strains of resistant "bugs" on anti-bacterial sprays, wipes, soaps, etc that kill off the weaker cooties and leave the stronger ones to breed. They recommend frequent hand-washing with regular old soap (it is the rubbing and rinsing for the entire length of the "ABC song" that gets the germs off). However, maybe the Japanese are on to something. I lived in Japan for a short while in my youth and when my class took a field trip by train (imagine a can of very polite sardines on rails!), the majority of the adults on the train wore surgical masks. You could get a whole wardrobe of them to match your outfit. That would certainly enhance your standing among the crazies. Hmmm- a hand-knit mutant muppet germ blocking mask......

I cannot believe the unmitigated gall of College Chick!!! You'd think after being busted by Snickerbeth, Mary and the others, she'd at least have had the common decency to remove her post. Incredible.

Love coming back from "vacation" and seeing the children (and Soba). Happy New Year, Purl.

Words to love? "Poppies" (knew a woman who had trained her dog to lay down and pretend to sleep ala Wizard of Oz when she said it)

Hot Stash Lemon and Ginger herbal tea burns out any cooties that may be lurking in your system - I drink this every winter and have been cold-free for 2 years.

Please accept my apologies from the City of Brotherly Love on behalf of the co-habitant "collegechick". Seems she's either from Philly or attending college here. Whoopee! Must be some great "University" she's going to, to show her that plagarism doesn't count except in the classroom! Beautiful!

Love you, love your kitties! Non-germy web kisses to all!

SO LOVED the mass transit post! This is my daily worklife too, commuting from one of the Twin Towns to the other. Just the other day I caught a bus to head home, breathless from having to sprint 2 blocks in the winter cold in order to catch it (weird cold weather, shortness of breath thingy I have). I sit down, still gasping, and this lady says to me, "Oooh! That's a pretty bag! Did you get it for Christmas?" I don't like to talk to strangers on the bus and this was a stranger talking about MY HANDBAG. I think my mom warned me about this talking to strangers stuff way back when. So I just mumbled, "thank you. no." then quickly extracted my iPod from my bag to hopefully zone out/signal end of (one-way) conversation. I really figured that was the last of it. HA! When we are nearing her stop she suddenly starts loudly dissing me to the other bus riders! I'm not kidding. She jerks her thumb in my direction and says, "this one over here I give her a nice compliment on her purse and she just rolls her eyes at me." Then gets up in my grill to wave bye-bye.

Part of my mass transit experience is more like Irene's with the unwashed, the nutters, the blatent sexist pigs, the prostetyzers...and I loathed the day they replaced most of the vinyl seats with upholstered ones. You can no longer tell with a quick glance what may be lurking on the surface. Ewww.

I recommend a bottle of wine. Alcohol kills germs right?!

Love the word list idea. Does anyone else have the urge to repeat words they like out loud when they read them? No?! Hmm. Nevermind.

I got the most fabulous mixed up English words when in Romania. I'd tell y'all what they changed "snacks" too, but it's kind of gross and it was on a menu.

Oh, it's so much more exciting/germy where I work. Of course, the crazy-weird germ-spreaders are only 6 or 7, not like your grumpy old coot on the bus, but hey, they get much closer to me, and the danger lasts all day. All day!! I wash hands compulsively from late August until the last school day in June. And let's see, I have purell on the desk, Lysol in the cabinet, and every munchkin brings a container of disinfectant wipes to school. I know these fabulous products don't get everything, but they help. And if they don't, shh, just let me enjoy my false sense of control. I share my knowledge of yucky germs with them, they know NOT to touch anything on my desk, and they are now trained to the point that if someone "catches" his sneeze in his hands, at least a half dozen bossy little germaphobes will say, "Eeeew, go wash your hands!" Gotta love the power of the teacher. Oh yeah, if you ever change careers, I don't recommend elementary school. Too many bodily fluids floating about.

LOLOLOL I do the same thing when it comes to planes. The thing is, I'm probably misleading and look like a non-survivor, but trust me I am terrified enough of dying that I will RIP THAT FUCKING DOOR OFF in four seconds flat, no matter how much it weighs.

Trust me.

All this talk of being polite, you'd think you were a Southern Gal, or something... Oh, wait...

Besides, he drew first blood, what with the not covering his mouth and all... I say, instead of knitting him a face mask, carry some of the disposable ones in your bag and the next time, ask him to cover his mouth, then put one on yourself!

Darned germy buggers. Just who do they think they are?

The kitties are snazzy tonight.
And even in therapy there would be no talk of psychosis. You are NOT detached from reality. (Which is the definition of psychosis.) You do have some slanted view of things... and you knew that. So you are one of the wlaking wounded and merely neurotic. I hope you have ample chicken soup and whatever other home remedies you fancy to restore yourself to the apex of vim and vigor over the weekend.

LOL. Your "survivor" theory reminds me of mine and my friends whenever we fly together. If the passenger manifest includes a baby, a nun or someone wearing a turban, we are convinced our plane will crash. Of course, this has happened four times on our trips over the pond, and we yet we're here to tell the tale!

As a teacher I am confronted daily with the sneezes, dripping, coughing, fingers in mouth, fingers in noses, and I will stop there. Teachers believe in airborne (to prevent the infection so use before you get on bus). We always have big boxes of Kleenex to hand out - bring on the bus and pass around (could be used to effectively stuff in mouth of loud talking lady.) We also keep a handy supply of EmegenC for the very instant we feel a tingle in our throats or noses. I actually take one a day during the cold and flu season and take multiples if I feel scratchy or sniffly.
You are a brave person to live in LA let alone climb onto a bus.

Snickers for Breakfast sounds awesome. I had a 100Grand bar for my breakfast this morning!!

Nice to meet you, found you through alisa at Playin' Whaley!!

Who needs therapy when you knit??? I was having a VERY bad week which peeked with a gyno exam. What did I do? I went to the LYS and dropped $85! Abt the same amt as therapy (I live in FL so its less here) but I left HAPPY instead of in tears. I just plugged into my inner yarn self and felt FANTASTIC with my bag of cotton and wool. And you could always knit a yarn mask for those germy moments on mass transit!!

I feel your pain, and join you in thinking that snickers is the breakfast of champions.

Funny about "collegechick"...plagiarism is soo soo easy to avoid. And it's so much easier to be like, "Like my CrazyAuntPurl at..., I too write out crazy lists.
Check me out! Look I'm crazy. Those pics above --- They aren't me! in fact, I haven't been to college, and I'm not actually female but a 45 year old man, named Shel who lives in my mother's basement. But those pics get me through the lonely times. So really my no. 1 thing to achieve in 2006 is to get a job, get a place, and get a life. In the meantime, I'll fantasize about the college chick above."

Plagiarism sucks.

oh my gosh - I had to see it for myself - how weird and creepy - how can college chick sleep at night? I feel very mean towards her. I'm sorry, I know mean is not nice (how's that for brilliant?), but I want to...be mean to her.

My condolences on your cooties.

My congratulations on your kitties.

My kudos on your clever blog.

I'll stop alliterating now. Love your writing, wish you were living on the East Coast so I could BEG YOU to teach me how to knit for my dog. I'll be back. Have fun in L.A. One of my sisters moved there the day before the Northridge quake...right into the epicenter. She stayed, through evacuation, homelessness, joblessness...right into true love and marriage....and relocation to the SF area...she does love those earthquakes now.

Which is a roundabout way of saying that this is gonna be your year.

i too had to check out college chick. she either has the comments turned off, or is deleting them ASAP. I told her she should be ashamed of herself, and should delete that post! she doesn't even have a way to email her....too bad, cause i would have told her off.

YOU are an original, Laurie! Thanks for the many great posts you shared with us all. And special thanks for all the great cat photos!

There's always this one guy on my bus and all year round he has a snotty nose, so all I ever hear is him sniffling. And sometimes there's three different people playing music (not on headphones - directly off their mobile phone, with no effort at all to make it quieter, but really though, why would you listen to loud music on public transport? It's always really bad music too. Maybe I should blast some good music at them, maybe they'll stop. Anyway, I'm getting off track here), so it makes for a very harmonious journey into university. If only driving a car wasn't so expensive!

The Mr. calls the germ carrying strata that coats all surfaces of public transportation "people juice". :P

I personally enjoy the borderline deathmatch that is my daily bus commute. There are some strange people on them buses, and I'm probably one of them. I do try to use my Inside Voice, though. And sneeze into a kleenex.

I {heart} frequent handwashing. I have a whole ritual (with songs and steps and everything). Hope you didn't catch any OMGs!

Too bad you don't live in a cold climate where you can cover your at-risk mucous membranes with a lovely hand-knit scarf. I know folks in L.A. wear scarves, but wrapping them around your ears and nose and mouth when it's 75ºF outside might get you a few odd looks, I'm guessing....