ENJOY YOUR BLOG...READ YOU LIVED IN ALABAMA AT ONE POINT...WHAT PART?

Just wanted to say hi, and it's OK not to be fine about things. Divorce sucks...

MLH -- I used to live in Muscle Shoals, and also in Tuscumbia Alabama. I have lived all over the South... I kinda get around. LOL.

Hang in there, Laurie. You're an inspiration to me, and probably lots of others. And you're damn funny.

The gods will look down upon you and send you good times and even better, good relationships. It's in your future. I can feel it.

Ok - that's just toooo weird! I also watched the interview & cried in watching Uma fight back her tears as I too can relate to her (who knew that would ever happen?).

And "moving on" is so hard when you really dont know what it means or how to do it. My random pitty parties of coming home to an empty house and all the things that come with a bad break up are become further & further apart.....but they are still there.

But one day it will be better for me, Uma & you!

Hang in there Aunt Purl!!!

Life is full of experiences and I think it's being able to share them with someone, anyone, that makes them more bearable...even if it's a celebrity on TV...suddenly we are not alone anymore.

Laurie! You are doing so totally GREAT. Even when you have those dog-petting-remembering-husband-asking-you memories, just remember that you don't WANT that guy asking you that any more. That's ok if you're remembering stuff, even if it's hard stuff. Hell, thank God you have freakin' EMOTIONS for chrissake! Love love love Uma, too.

Your post made me sniffle a little into my wine - I'm glad you were home to see Uma (good plan Buddha!) and to relax and drink those beers.

And CONGRATULATIONS for quitting smoking and sticking with it - you are doing an amazing job!

I saw the Jennifer Aniston episode too, and she was NOT fine. She sounded like she was holding back tears the entire time, and it even showed in her face at the end. And that is TOTALLY normal. Just like you! Well... except for the whole yarnsniffing thing.

I think you are one of my heroes.

"Except that I am not a skinny, 8-foot-tall glamazon who is rich and famous and in movies."

Yea but has Uma been PUBLISHED in an Annie Modesitt book? (Loved your story BTW, bought the book all because of you, bet ya didnt know that)And does Uma have so many people who think she is smart and funny and doesn't give herself nearly enough credit like a certainly (cough Laurie) someone who (cough Laurie) shall remain (cough Laurie) nameless????

It's a rollercoaster ride kiddo - but you aren't riding alone!

You sniffed a gourd?

Sending you a hug, Laurie. Life's a beechnut sometimes but you'll survive, and you'll survive with style, grace, humor and the love of many people out here in cyberland who are rooting for you and who care about you.

Did you order any UpCountry yesterday? Will it come soon for you to feel better? You can snuggle in the skeins...... mmmmmmmm.. that will make you feel better :)

when i broke up with 'the creep' a friend recommended this awesome book - "In the Meantime" by Ilyana VanSandt (that name might be misspelled), it was so completly perfect for what i was going through...next time you have a vacation day you should check it out!

I'm happy for your happy. :)

Ya know, Laurie, someone once asked me "What do you regret most in your life?" Now, I am not at all philisophical (hell, I can't even spell it apparently and I don't feel like looking it up) but as I pondered the question, I finally came up with this answer:

"Nothing. Because all the shit, even the baddest of the shit, taught me something and I cannot regret learning anything."

For some reason, I feel this is relevant to your post. I think. Anyway, good for you for not smoking! I have also remained smoke free for just over two months, thanks to you and my yarn! Hang in there, girlie! You are doing great!

AWESOME post!!! I am so glad to hear someone talking real about how sucky divorce is, even if you know it's right, you know you're better off, you know yadayadayada, it still sucks sometimes.

And who knew you had been a 'Bama girl? We are a rare breed out here in the blogosphere, at least the ones I read.

I am new to your very funny blog. I am sorry about your pain with your divorce. Hang in there as best you can.

Sometimes it just helps to hear someone (celebrity or no) going through what we're going through. Saw Melissa Etheridge on Oprah last week, talking about her breast cancer recovery, which was quite timely and helpful, as my sister-in-law's mother is going through the same thing. It helped me to know what to say to my sister-in-law, who is anxious and scared for her mother....

I hate to tell you this, but the crazy little things that remind you of the life you used to have? Never go away. But eventually, instead of feeling like they just popped every single stitch that is holding your wounded heart together, they're just things you remember.

Like when you're walking by a couple on a street and you hear some guy call some girl by the pet name that HE used to call you? In a year, it still makes you sad. In two years, you think "Well, isn't she an idiot? Buying that crap that is SO obviously a line!" But then after five years you think "Aw! What a cute couple!"

I know. The five year realization happened last week.

I think that one of the things that helped me get past the "couple memory" moments like those was to go find ways to reclaim certain things as mine. Songs I associated with him - find new associations
Going to restaurants we used to go to- etc..
Cuz I didn't want to lose the things that were me just because they were, for a time, shared with him.

Keep petting the dogs, that part was yours and it brings you joy. (and them) (Bring wipes maybe?)

And celebrity is relative - I read this blog way often than I see Uma Thurman movies .. which by my figuring makes you the bigger celebrity.

girl you will be fine!!! i would love to live your life... after being married for 3 years with 4 kids... your life sound perfect to me!!!! my mom has been divorced for 4 years and living by herself in her 4 bedroom house that herbabby daddy pays for and she is happy. a lone but not loney!!! you'll get through. it will get better than you'll look back and say... "i was trippin... this is nice"

waaay bigger celebrity!!!If I was drinking a beer
whist I was reading this, it so would have come out my nose!!!You and Buddah ..I gotta party with you guys!!!!!!

I have to admit, Oprah has really helped me out with some stuff too.

Go you!

I have been lurking on your HILARIOUS blog for awhile and although you don't know me I swear that as I was watching Oprah today I thought of you! I hope you don't think I am a stalker. But you are just right in everything you said about Uma.

Four cats have to be better than any one man anyway, right?

rightie-o missy, you did alot of learnin' for one day. go have some wine right and i'll join you up here in the Central Coast (where my neighbors have chickens and don't ask me why, they remind me of you).

inky love purl.

You lack self-control. Don't cry into the beer or wine...it waters them down. PUT DOWN THE BEER/WINE and cry elsewhere.
I wish I could have a beer right now. My next brew will be in Jan.
You are sooooo lucky.

You know I had one of those moments too. I was a a grocery store and I saw this couple and the girl was laughing, laughing, laughing at everything the guy said and it reminded me of the way things were with my guy and that they are not like that anymore and I got a huge lump in my throat. (This was ages ago but thanks for reminding me, I'm sad all over again!)

you know i was in a micheal's today and i also sniffed a gourd. creeeepyy

btw, that oprah is sneaky. you're going along fine with makeovers and interior design and then all of the sudden wham! you're crying into your drink.

Okay...a pal of mine at work has now got me addicted to your blog. I think it's amazing, and *hugs* you for being so open about what you've been feeling and sharing with us. You will be fine...you will survive this moment and some time in the future you will look back and laugh saying 'hey I remember _______ and I thought it wouldn't get any better."

Being a single gal in the 21st century is not that easy...believe me. And I've now started my own blog to make the free world aware how damned hard it is. ( http://singlegrlsingsthebluz.blogspot.com/)

As for Lost? I am not sure if I am loving it just yet. But like I commented on Chase's blog...I feel like we're watching The Wizard of Oz.

We have Desmond (The Scarecrow) because just how easy was it for him to fall in to the 'push the button' mode. C'mon guy...get a brain.

Kate (The Wicked Witch of the West) Love me, trust me, I want a gun, don't touch me...who do I chose? It's all about me and if someone gets more attention my lips crumple as I try not to cry. Oh yeah, I'm my own person...can't tell me what to do.

Hurly (The Lion)The numbers are bad...don't say them, look at them, think of them. Let's not try and find out anything about them. I'll just hide until we decide where we're going to live. Get some courage dude!

And let's not forget our hero Jack. (The Tinman) No one knows how I had it. No one has loved, felt, or worked as hard as me. No, Locke I will not help you or wait with you...because I have NO HEART!!!

One of my SnB friends up here in Silicon Valley was digging through some old patterns at The Lace Museum recently, and found a pattern that might make you feel better. Go to this page, scroll down one or two screens, and check out the model on the Classic Elite pattern:

http://melody.virelai.net/blog/c/archives/2005/09/12T102716

Jeez. See what sorts of horrible things can happen when we "get out a little more often"? We're way better off veggin' in front of the tv, right? Thanks for putting things into perspective about what could actually happen if I gave in to the insistent feeling that I really do need to get some exercise.

Okay, seriously, though, it's a nice thing when you see that someone who appears perfect is really just like us (not that we want Uma to suffer, but it's nice to know we're not as pathetic as we thought).

Some day you will say, "I'm fine." and discover you really are. It will come in it's own time, but it will come.

Sorry to hear that your day off brought you pain and I hope you are soon feeling better.

You are a celebrity - my mom and I ask each other, "Did you read Aunt Purl yesterday?" :)

Love you, darlin.

Oh, sweetie, wish I could give you a big hug and hand you a beer. Losing someone you love just plain sucks and there are so many up and downs in the process of dealing with all the anger, pain, etc. As they say, "with time it will get better". For me, that "time" bit was many years.

I hope you start having more good moments than bad per day.

Ms. Laurie I think you are doing well. Tailspin, if any, seems to be leveling off.
Enjoyed reading this, enjoyed hearing that you have learned that you are not alone. Sucks to be in the club I guess, but at least you have good company. Maybe someday you will get to remind someone else of this fact too. wouldn't that be grand.
Thanks for your post.
David.

I have just gone through a divorce, though my circumstances were different- I initiated it and am very happy I left- it is still a divorce. But here is my little insight... there will come a day when those little memories become a reminder of why you loved him in the first place, and remind you that once upon a time, it was good. Times changed and things got bad, but they were not always like that. Recently, a friend said to me "that is the first thing you have said about Bob that wasn't angry". I am starting to remember that things were good once, and rememebering them sort of validates the choice you made to marry him. ANd it isn't and "I wish I could go back..." kind of memory. It is just a memory that doesn't hurt anymore. Though, they do make you kind of sad that things changed.

And when you walk in your door, don't think "this is my house without him" think "This is my damn house, and I can paint it orange, and I get the remote!!!"

Things do get better, I know it is cliche to say, but it is true. You are a wonderful, funny woman, and he was an idiot if he didn't get that.

Oh Laurie! You rock! I'm sorry that this is such a hard time for you, but I['m glad you found a little happines in all of the shit going on. Good luck! (PS _ I sent you an e-mail a few days ago about my sister in law, going through the same thing. You have really helped her - so even though things are crappy, because of that you have touched someone else, like Uma touched you. It['s a good thing.)

Consider yourself blog-rolled.

I really enjoy this blog.

Think of it this way - if you have to identify with any celebrity, at least you are identifying with the one that played badass Beatrix Kiddo, wielding a samurai and getting wild revenge.

Rent Kill Bill and feel better about this affinity you feel with the Uma.

the not trusting part?...i can totally relate.

And you know, I think I've read that Uma Thurman is an avid knitter and often knits on the sets of movies between takes. So there you go.

that's really really good for a vacation day. it's okay to be broken. today you're a little less broken than you were a month ago. and, although it may seem like a long way off, there will be a time when you forget what this is like. you aren't alone in this, although this experience is isolating. i'm glad you found comfort in today. i hope it makes tomorrow easier, as well. here's to tomorrows!

Oh, thanks for this ... it's funny, it's one in the morning on now-a-Sunday in London and I've just spent two hours on the Tube getting home after a date thinking a lot of the same here.

I walked home in the dark and didn't tell anyone I was going home and am now sitting in my flat (what, no wine? unfair, I forgot to go to the shop) vaguely moping ... but that little bit of solidarity helped. A lot. Cheers.

Amen, Aunt Purl! It's been almost three years since my ex and I separated, and a year since the divorce, and even though I'm dating a man I care about, there are times when I just want to curl up in the corner and cry. It's unfair, it's heartbreaking, but I know there is a sisterhood going through the same thing. You, me, Uma, and the rest. xx

I was like that the first two times my ex left me. After that, I started leaving the men behind in their beer. :) It will get better.

Celebrities are humans like us, only rich and on TV.

I just wanted to say, that I found my way here through a link on someone elses blog back in august, and since then I have checked literally every day to see what new witty insights you'll have. And I am honestly so inspired by how strong, capable, and just damn amazing you are. Oh, and love the knitting! I've been knitting since I was about 5, and oh, love it!

anyway, thank you for sharing so much of yourself on this blog - it is inpiring and humorous and just lovely.

Sounds like you had a great vacation day and got some new insight to boot. You go girl! Oprah + Uma = normal. Who knew? Who cares where the help comes from though as long as it helps, right?

PS could you please send info on the self-cleaning house? I have people coming next weekend and I really need a house that can clean itself, because me...not so much with the cleaning.

we're a sisterhood girl! It wasn't until I had my own heartbroken that I really saw it, it's a right of passage a sucky rite of passage but one nonetheless and we got your back...'cause we've all been there.

For me, a year after the goodbyes I know I'm a much better person, have a much better life and made the best choice possible in getting out of that relationship. But I still miss him. He's vile to me now and hurting and I can't be around him but I still miss him. He will always have a piece of me and maybe I'll always silently grieve that relationship to a degree but in an odd way he (in being a shit) gave me new direction that was sorely needed, made me grow up, made me like me, made me see I was capable of leaving. Yeah, so maybe moving on isn't forgetting it's more rethinking what the relationship was to mean in the overall course of your life. Dunno....

I guess this post de-lurked a lot of people.. I just wanted to say that, like everyone else, I read your blog daily too.. and it's funny, and so cute :) always a good place to escape to when you want to be someone else for a while (and you'll be surprised how many people would want to be you, despite it all). You're not Uma Thurman - you're Laurie, crazy aunt purl, and in my opinion that's much better then being some Uma. I mean, who calls their kid Uma anyway?

Anyway, from what I read about you so far, you deserve much much better then your ex - and you'll get it, you'll see.

All the best,
Ayelet (and the cats)

You are one of the strongest women I have ever known and a true role model, not to mention a Steel Magnolia poster child! The South should make you their national face!

And I'm sure your parents couldn't be more proud.

Hey Laurie, I just wanted to tell you, you are not alone. I used to feel that way. But then, you have to realize, that it's YOU who likes to go on walks, and YOU who likes to pet dogs, and reclaim your life. When you get a memory like that of Mr. X, mentally kick his butt and flip him off, and tell him, get out of my head!

I just saw the Oprah/Jennifer Anniston interview this morning on TiVo and I thought how strange it was that she kept saying "I'm doing great... Life is great!" Must be her survival instincts kicking in as the whole world watched her go through this awful thing.

Anyway, I'm pulling for you! You are well-loved by your readers, friends and family. Soon, you'll look back at this big cloud in your life and say how you are doing great now and really mean it.

Figures. The day I actually agonized over whether to fight the traffic from Brentwood to the Farmer's Market (traffic won, I went home) you make an appearance. Would have loved to say hi. Oh well, next time. But your recap made me feel like I was there. Hope all is well with you!

I'm a little late posting here...

I started reading your blog at beginning the demise of my own marriage. While I see the divorce (3 months to go) as a blessing in disguise, I still have my really-pissed-off-at-him days and my really sad days. I'm with ya.

Here's to more of the happy-to-pet-a-dog-without-him-askin' days. You really are better off without him and in the paraphrased words of a sweetie that posted a comment on my blog... someday someone will come to know you and realize all he wants is you.

And here's to that day. :)

I have been reading your blog here and there, but today I add you to my blogroll.

I am happily married, but my husband went through much of what you are going through when his wife left him (except that he's a guy and if he saw Uma on Oprah he would have had kind of a different reaction). But then he met me and he still says (13 years later) that things work out for the best and that he wouldn't have wished for things to have turned out any differently.

You just haven't got to the good part yet.

You rock, I weep. I hope I'm not the fat friend standing on your chest (don't smoke!) and once again your writing is worth double the price of admission.

You can do anything you want, girl, you are amazing.

Autie, you slay me!!! ;)

God bless Uma Thurman. I hope you're feeling a little bit better now.

Perhaps we'll see each other at SnB. I go to the same one, but also really infrequently, so I've never seen you there. Maybe next time....

Chin up and stay away from those smokes.

you're an 8 foot gorgeous glamazon to me.

i'm glad uma helped. and oprah.

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