I get the Talking Crochet newsletter in my email each week & was so excited to see Drew on there! I've been blogstalking him throfor a couple of weeks now (stalk! stalk! stalk!).

that was supposed to be "for", not "throfor".
Forgive me. Its 422 on Friday - I need a Stella.

Vanessa, I feel you. I caught 27 typos in my column up there and finally gave up. It's friday. Let the poor grammar and punctuation rule.

At least you don't leave incredibly inappropriate comments on people's blogs about snails leaving a trail of ghiz on patios.

girl, you make me ALMOST want to move back to The Valley. Almost. love ya!!

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!!

Hello Kitty vibrator?

You and I are either on the same drugs, or NEED TO BE on the same drugs! I say the MOST inane things to ....well...ANYONE! Love your blog.

I suffer from the same affliction (lack of internal dialogue filter)...

After my most recent break up I blurted out (to a newly married friend) that "love is for chumps." I felt about two inches high after it flew out of my mouth.

a HELLO KITTY Vibrator???

Girl!

Hope your ma and pa stay high and dry (except for the lobsterita)!

by the way Raurie? Love is still out there, and you'll find one that comes with his own creativity.. and best of all if he comes with the kind of creativity that means your Hello Kitty's batteries corrode from disuse!

heheheheheheh

I am raising a glass FULL OF WINE to you and to Friday. Have a great weekend.

You're doing better than me! I barely said a peep at our SnB. Except tell the story where I met Andrew McCarthy, AGAIN! I raise my glass of Shiraz in your direction, sister. Keep on blogging.

You make me want to move west. Then I remember the traffic. And the heat. And the weirdos. Nope, I'll stay here. hehe I don't deal well with traffic and I melt in the heat. And I like to be the weirdo that everyone talks about. Out there I would be normal. Can't do it. hehe

OK, you mention the lame story about me going to Alaska and the Hello Kitty vibrator but not the fascinating one about my husband and I being queer as two $3 bills?

By the way. I have a really great porn story for you next week...Promise!

You would be the funnest person to be stalked by.

Okay, about the Hello Kitty vibrator: is it a good sturdy vibrator, or is it just for show? It would suck out loud to go buying something like that that's so dang cute and then have it fall apart.

I am not familiar with this Lobsterita of which you speak. Is it made from real lobsters?

Obviously your parents have acclimated to Florida. That's my kind of camping too! Ah, another fun filled snb :)

I want to sell my house and move somewhere. Where should I move?

Is that crack house still open a few doors down...?

Speaking of blogstalking, I don't know you but this post made me LAUGH OUT LOUD, seriously. Just thought you'd like to know.

~Ali

Annie, I believe the crackhouse is open, willing and waiting. I will even help you clean away the pile of burned-out crap off the front yard. Please move here. I'll bring the wine!

If Annie is moving then I'm moving too. I bake an awesome cake.

how come jen is so photogenic? can we hate her?

I'm imagining a lobsterita as sort of a combination of lobster and margarita - it sounds sort of disturbing but also perhaps incredibly declicious - like a very intoxicating ceviche, or a savory smoothie?

Lobsterita - umm, yeah... Do you suck it up through a lobester claw or anything?
Thanks for your thanks - my blog has never had so many hits in one day before. Now I know how Annie Modesitt felt. LOL

In my partner's family the singular of sheep is shoop (think geese, goose; from here you can also get the plural of moose to be meese but I don't think there are moose in southern California). They're English. But it works.

Weather is relative. You folks think you have a use for wool hats and aran sweaters when you live in Southern California. Your parents will go 'camping' because it is 'only' a tropical storm. My English partner thinks it is 'sweltering' when it is abover 70F (he's dying right now but gracefully making the best of it. Honestly he prefers the below zero stuff.)

An air filter may make it bearable for allergic folks to be in your house. Especially if they sit right next to it. Tell them to look the cats in the eye. Cat's think that's agressive. Avoiding their eyes will make them come and sit on your lap.

I've not posted before.. but you've got to know.. this made me laugh so loud the kids came running up to see!!!!!! :oD

And my sympathies to Jo in Ottawa's English guy.. from the melting English girl! :o) (who adores the man/woman/thing who ever thought up air conditioning!)

seriously I thought I was reading "lobsteritO" when i read the blog. i thought, how cute those floridians are to give a lobster burrito a funny name.

but reading the comments now (dedicated blog stalker that i am) i see it's lobsteritA.

DUH INKY!

Lobsterita®
Our gigantic, frozen Cuervo Gold tequila margarita. Traditional or strawberry.

I hope to hell it doesn't have any lobster in it. mmmm, bisque margarita. ick.

Oh Aunt Purl,

You make me laugh! you are on my daily blog read list now thanks to MajorKnitter Jen.

parents, you just never get to stop worrying about them...

I have verbal issues and I was raised in Ohio. But now I live in the land of sweet tea. And hurricanes. Last year was my first year here and we had seven million of them. I hope this year is better.

I have never commented before but I wanted to now..

You make me laugh! I even had to go and read your archives.. I too am divorcing, but with two small boys instead of cats, and you are my daily dose of happiness. I knit to stave off the lonely unhappy thoughts..

I just wanted to say hi!

Okay, the knittin' hillbilly has the truck loaded and the rocking chair on top is ready for my Jewish MIL Elaine.

We just discovered that our house is now appraised for more than 3x what we paid for it. It's a terrible, sad joke, is what it is. I swear they just do it to raise the taxes. Insane, and I don't believe it for a minute.

But I told the hub, "We have to sell this cow and move to CAL to be near CAP!"

To keep it in perspective, we have a small 3 BR colonial, and our property taxes are now almost $11K/year. Isn't NJ grand?

Let's just throw it all away and open a bakery/knitting store/wine bar called "Knit One, Sip Two?" eh?

Laurie, I love you. I mean, not really love you, love you, in a creepy stalker way that freaks you out, but in an oh-my-christ-you-totally-crack-me-up way. And so help me, are we the same person? I've got NO brain-to-mouth filter whatsoever. The other night, after a work outing, I realized that I told THREE COLLEAGUES of the time that I put KY Jelly on my lips in a client meeting (thought it was lip balm, long story), and then proceeded to turn to one of them and wonder aloud, "I wonder if it's cooler at my house than it is standing here. Because, you know, I live in Swampscott, and it's usually cooler. Except when it's warmer. Or the same." and then I laughed uncontrollably like an idiot.

Can I just say that you are so awesome. I have been stalking your blog for a few weeks now and I can't get enough. I went on vacation and the first thing I did when I got back was to check and see what crazy things Aunt Purl has been up to. I just wanted to put out there that you are super smart and funny and the coolest girl ever. Mr. X is a fool and you are so lucky that he left you so you don't have to be with an idiot you doesn't appreciate the wonderful person that you are. I know it sucks, but it is better to be alone than be with someone who isn't good enough to hold your shoe.(not sure what that means) And you have all of us crazy internet stalkers that love you and think your the greatest. So hang in there, some day you just may find a great guy who sees you for who you are, a beautiful, silly, smart, brillant writer, creative, generous, loving, funny, witty, fabulous girl. And if not, I hope you are learning that you can be happy with 4 cats, great friends and a hello kitty vibrator.

-Jenny

Annie - love the "Knit One, Sip Two"! Count me in if you ever open it!

Laurie - maybe you could knit a Hello Kitty Vibrator cozy at SnB? BTW...where would you get a Hello Kitty Vibe anyway?

Also, at my work we (meaning several coworkers... including my boss) each have a stack of pennies. Each time we say anything inappropriate (which is all the time) we lose a penny. The first to lose all their pennies has to take everyone else out for Happy Hour. Which actually just kind of encourages the behavior... hmm...maybe we need to rethink this.

oh thank you Aunt Purl for making sure everyone knows that we southern girls aren't all moonlinght and magnolias. Some of us are strobe lights and cacti.

I'm so relieved to see that somebody else has parents who try to ride out a hurricane in an RV. My parents on the east coast of Florida did the same thing, twice, last year. How nerve racking can that be? Do they think only mobile homes are affected...not 35 foot campers?

hee hee hee hee

http://www.hellocat78.1hwy.com/

I have a friend that is obsessed w/HK & she has one of these. Plus the toaster that imprints pictures of Hello Kitty on your toast.

I've been stalking you for a couple of months now and it's scary. I tell people about you life I know you.

As a sweet tea drinker, I think that there is something in it that makes you say inappropriate things. Things that make your customers look at you funny/disgustedly. And it makes customers ask you, who just moved to this town, wildly personal questions.

Oh, and makes the mean old lady down the street talk bad about you.

We Southerns are crazy.

Laurie, something tells me that we would have some interesting conversations together. I hate how bad days completely suck all brain power and you end up doing or saying things that you just can't explain your way out of.

And at least you're Southern and people actually DO think you're colorful when you shoot off at the mouth. When people find out I'm from Oklahoma originally, all I get is a puzzled frown and a condescending pat on the shoulder. Good god, do they even have electricity there? Indoor plumbing? Internets?

:D

I love your blog! I have started reading you everyday so I thought it was about time I say hi so you don't think I am some creepy stalker who doesn't want to give away her identity :D

I absolutly have to get a hello kitty vibrator! I love that cat! :D

I hate missing Stitch N Bitch. Hopefully I can shoot over there this Thursday. Things are nutso around here. Miss ya!

Here's some of the best advice I have ever received: Don't be so critical of what you say; other people are generally busy worrying about what they have said or are going to say, so they are unlikely to be judging you. Yeah, we all know that's BS sometimes, but mostly I think it's true... my point is, I have it on good authority from Angie that you are just as charming in person as you are on your blog, so you should probably stop worrying so much. :) Also, on a related note, did I mention that I write really obnoxious comments?

Hope your weekend was a good one!!

Don't worry, I managed to bring up porn _again_ at my knit night. I don't even remember how I did it - one moment, I'm being quiet and working on my shawl, and the next, I'm practically shouting something about Porn.

I've seen like 3 minutes of a porno, and that's because I was like in 7th grade and one of my classmates had one of her brothers and, um, I fled the room. Maybe it scarred me for life, and that's why I end up yelling about porn a lot.

What is the plural of sheep?