I still have my first penpal...she now lives in Washington state. She used to live in S. California....we've been writing for 30 years...
cool, huh???

And all this time I thought you didn't answer my comments because you don't like me . . . seriously, don't be so hard on yourself. We're all out here reading and loving you!

I told you you need to hire me as your mailroom manager. (I have five years of experience ya know as I sit here reading your blog at work - in the mailroom... my life is so exciting) Either that or use usps.com and have the postman come to YOU to pick up your packages! But I totally understand your dilemma, as I am also a PoP - Princess of Procrastination. Just tell everyone "Good things come to those who wait!"

I am also a long-time sufferer of the two P's. Yup, the thought of going back to uni this autumn makes me want to hide under the bed.

My dear, we all suffer from the two P's in some way or other (heh, you think YOUR mail correspondence is slow? You should see mine... birthdays, Mother's Day, Graduation, yay baby they're all still sitting here, at my house, not even in the ENVELOPE!) Don't be hard on yourself. We the readers know that you have a long commute to and from work. We know that you work hard to keep the kitties in their clean cat litter and Friskies. Just remember that if you keep waiting it will only get worse. The mail will double, the email triple and so forth. Perfect or not, people love it because you care enough to send it. Keep smiling, and remember tomorrow is another day. Small changes and baby steps will get you there.
Hugs'n'happy thoughts (and mental voodoo saying, "You can do it. You can do it!"

At least your ass-diminishing foods have purpose (separate the beer from the Diet Coke).

The veggies in my fridge inevitably become part of a bizarre elementary school decomposition experiment.

You are a goof. Lighten up on yourself.

I'm imagining that your little Manitoba pen-pal probably did the same thing when she went to the mail to get your letters - wandered down the long driveway with her dog to see what would surprise her there. Not to burst your bubble, but you know Manitoba is farm country, right? Mind you, it is very exotic farm country. They live in igloos and they use huskies to pull the farm equipment and they grow snow cones and other snow related products (where do you think the snow-globe came from?).

I'm here to pimp the one thing that seemed to help me break the stranglehold that the 2 P's had on me. Flylady.net and the bounty of emails (that I get in digest form) remind me every day that those P's are my enemy.

Huh -- I thought I was the only 33 year old who still gets childish delight from getting the mail every day. Even a day with nothing but bills and junk mail is better than those sad infrequent days when NO MAIL COMES AT ALL.
I am bad, bad, bad about keeping in touch with people. At various times, I go into fits of letter writing, but it never sticks. I think because I can type so much faster than I write.

the two Ps are definetely at home with me. Love your blog.

girl, i am the patron saint of the twin P's. it takes me weeks and weeks to even acquire the stuff to be mailed. actually mailing? forget it. i hate the post office and stopping there always has to involve stopping afterwards in the office where i used to work. i get stuck there for hours. i avoid the P.O. at all costs.

As far as news is concerned, you're certainly out of the loop, but never fear. I am here to save you from almost certain humiliation. Yahoo has posted today that Michael Jackson will almost certainly be harrassed if he goes to jail. I mean, I had to tell you that because there is no way you could have figured that out on your own.

Aren't you glad I just saved you?

How did you get so dang lovable? Must have been the Comort-Texas air... ;)

Well, great minds think alike. I was intent on writing about the 2 p's today and you beat me to it. Isn't it amazing how readily procrastination agrees with perfection's reasoning and how much procrastination facilitates perfection? There's some sort of codependence at work here. We need to fire and boot out one of the p's. Together they are relentless tormentors.

Oh my. Maybe you didn't get to the memo yet. Let me sum it up for you - most people set an extra place at the dinner table for the 2 P's. You are NOT alone!

I mean really, do you know how long I had your package ready to go before it *actually went*? SHESH woman, cut yourself some slack! I understand perfectionism, as a fellow sufferer. The only way to stop letting it run your life is to realize we don't want the perfect Laurie, we want you - your imperfections are some of your endearing qualities, and while I can't/won't speak for the ENTIRE mob of your blog readers, I think it's a safe bet that if you were PERFECT, and everything was just so, and life didn't kick you in the ass from time to time like the rest of us, we'd probably all find you quite boring ;-)

Seriously Laurie, you can do what you can do with the hours in the day. Stop stressing over it, and know that we DO understand!

err, perfection facilitates procrastination that is. I agree completely with drew...it is impossible to find you anything but lovable!

I was going to suggest flylady.net, but Stephanie beat me to it! So I'll just second her suggestion. I can't say enough good things about FlyLady!

I've been reading your blog for a few weeks now, and one of the reasons I keep coming back every day is that you're NOT perfect! You come across as a genuine, down-to-earth person with a great sense of humor. And I can relate to so much of what you write (except I only have 1 cat)!

Laurie...shoot me off a quick e-mail with your address and I will send you some loot when I get back from New Orleans. Us cancer gals gotta stick together. :)

I agree - the Ps are brutal. I have about 5 birthday gifts (unsent) under my desk right now, handmade Christmas cards (partially finished and also unsent) from the past 3 years, and 8000 pounds of good intentions accompanied by corresponding angst for failure to execute such intentions in any way, shape or form.

Also, accomplishing perfection is SO ANNOYING and NOT FUNNY AT ALL and makes people want to vomit on you. Sometimes its better to just have another glass of wine and stop hitting yourself on the head with the guilt stick, so as to encourage the flow of creative thoughts to your brain. This activity (wine) is important and productive and should be respected as such.

I don't see how the two P's manage to spend much time at your house, as much as they spend at mine. Perhaps they're on the road a lot. ;o)

My rose bush, which I was going to prune last winter but ... uh ... never did, is now a tangled mess, and our pool is surrounded by a trio of shrubzillas (bushes that have got to be at least 10 feet tall). And I've still got a packet of seeds to plant that I received, err, last summer from a friend. Guess I should eat 'em by now too. All this to say -- I feel your pain! ;o)

I also identified with your rural roots, the long dirt driveway and the delight of opening a *full* mailbox. Thanks for the pleasant thoughts/memories.

Three things:

1. Birthday! Say when! Say when!
2. At least your fridge _has_ vegetables. Mine has diet coke, spoiled milk, and various mustards.
3. Manitoba! I applied for a job there this year and got far too carried away at the thought of romping through the snow with the polar bears. Love. It.

Oh good, I was afraid I'd been too eager in my adoration and scared you from ever responding to me. :)

Re: writing, try reading "Bird by Bird" by Annie Lamott (and, for that matter, her other books, which make even the most disorganized among us seem together). She talks about "shitty first drafts" and writing as much as you can see in a one-inch picture frame.

There's also an expression I heard from some other knitter: "Could you see it from a prancing pony?" If not, try to forget it.

Gardens and knitting are FOR FUN. Purge all guilt associated therewith. If your knitting looks at you funny, threaten to unravel it. If your yard gives you a look, point out that it could be concrete. These things are here to serve you! The news? If you ignore it, there will be more of the same tomorrow.

Perfection is overrated. Or is that Overated. I'm not friggin' looking it up.

You, my dear, are wonderful. But you are not god. You are not the eternal, the goddess, shiva or any other non human. See, I'm so imperfect that I actually write god, with the "o" and everything (although I prefer the gender neutral and mysterious eternal)

As we used to say in the costume shop - "Done is beautiful!" Save the perfection for the paycheck stuff, so that you'll have the $$ to continue the love. And save a little of the perfection for you. The rest of us adore you, imperfect and late - don't change!

My friends and I love this blog. We have a debate about the usage of the word "ya'll". Some friends from the South say that it's supposed to be "y'all".....the apostrophe replacing the "ou" part of the word "you". Does anyone know what way is correct?

Oh, btw, I haven't mailed a holiday card in 3 years. My mother in law is about to disown me (and also partly for insisting on writing god with a small g and an "o")

Oy, jeez. Yep, that just about sums it up.

Oh yes, I know the two P's well.

Your word is Manitoba ... mine is Djibouti (ja-booty). :p

I, too, am well acquainted with the Ps. And put me down as another 33 year old who is childishly delighted at the arrival of mail; our mailman doesn't come at the same time every day so I usually end up checking at least four times on days when there is none, like today :(

Give yourself a break!!

You are one fab lady. You get so many comments on your blog you'd need a full time job to reply to them all :)

Never mind the two Ps - you inspire, you write brilliantly, you make me laugh, you make me cry.

And if it makes you feel any better, we're moving house in 2 weeks - yes 2 weeks - and do we have a thing packed? No matter we're not just moving us but two dogs, 80 angora goats and 30 sheep!!

Tomorrow is a new day. Don't stress.

Hugs.

C

Breathe. Slowly and deeply. You have a lot of things on your plate right now, and you can only do so many things at one time. So don't drive yourself crazy trying to do everything (and perfectly at that). Your mental health and well-being are way more important than broccoli, your garden or Michael Jackson.

As for pen pals, mine was from Tasmania. I loved the fabulous wildlife stamps she used on her letters.

Mine was the Ivory Coast! Damn if that's not romantic sounding.

Still never been there.

So, you haven't sent me mail and presents b/c you've been too busy! And here I was thinking it was because, well, you have no idea who I am. ;)

Yes, relax! It will all get done. (And may I recommend the Click-and-Ship service from www.usps.com? You can pay the postage, print the labels, and schedule a pick up of packages at your next regular mail delivery--all without having to schlep anything at all to the post office!) I love mail too--getting and sending--but I long since decided it's better to be a tiny bit less than perfect than to never get it in the mail. (For example, I never reread letters I've written before sending them--they just sound dreadfully banal and would never get out the door!)

I love mail too, AND I make cards. Tell me where to mail one. :)

I've mostly given up on buying vegetables... I got tired of them going bad in my fridge.

June gloom might actually be a good time to plant your seeds... the rain will help get them started, and it's not like you actually get winter there anyway.

World events: rest assured you're completely up to date. Oh... just add that Pope Prude has proclamed (as expected) that gays are evil. (As is birth control, etc.)

I know Perfectionism and Procrastination. Add in a very healthy Fear of Failure, and my PhD is moving along at positively glacial speeds.

I'm *from* Manitoba! :) I grew up in Winnipeg, Manitoba, and spent my summers at a family cabin near Flin Flon, Manitoba. (That's a fun one to say too.) Did you know that Manitoba means "place where the spirit lives", and Winnipeg means "muddy water"? Flin Flon is short for the main character in the novel "The Sunless City". (Very boring book, but there's a really neat reason Flin Flon is called that.)

wow. I'm neither P(rocrastinator) or P(erfectionist). I'm just lazy. where does that leave me?

like those who got to blogstalk before me this morning, ease up on ya'self girlie! we love you for who you are, not how much you do for us.

Oh, my gosh, you are my soul twin. And, guess what? The holiday cards I did not send this year are still sitting in the DINING ROOM with the ones I didn't send last year. The postage has gone up since the first ones, I think. I didn't get around to putting them all back in the attic. And I only have to concentrate on putting off putting them away for six more months, and they'll be current again!

Oh my god you just explained my life. Why oh why, do I overwhelm myself with clever, hard to execute ideas for cards and thank yous that because they will never be perfect or the way I invisioned them, simply never happen when an easy pre-printed "thank you" card or little gift sent promptly would have been so so much better than... nothing. maybe its a designer thing. oh, and crafts and knitting projects? Lets not go into how many of those I have started and abandonded. chaos. At least I'm not alone.

Yep, 32 years old and I still walk down that dirt path called a driveway EVERY DAY thinking that something magical will show up in the mailbox. And usually I'm rewarded with bills. Joy. I'm also another one of the "make everything yourself" posse...holiday cards, christmas gifts, birthday presents, etc. I usually give myself an ulcer trying to get it all done on time. You are certainly not alone. :)

PHILOSOPHICAL DIATRIBE BEGINNING HERE:

Modern life generates too many things for any of us to do in one day, it's a miracle we get it together to get out of bed, much less mail our packages, answer our e-mail, work our jobs, post to our blogs, knit our knits, cook our food, diet our diets, exercise for our health, get our teeth cleaned, buy all the stuff we don't need (but do), call our friends, pay our bills, commute our commutes, care for our pets and human offspring, need I go on?

END OF DIATRIBE

The "P" twins in my life are conjoined. Sometimes everything becomes overwhelming and I wallow in guilt that only generates more P behaviors, and a lot of snarkiness towards my family.

Oh yeah, we won't mention the $5 parking ticket that was not justified, that I intended to protest, but didn't, and that has now been transformed into a warrant for my arrest, will we?

Howdy!
You are my daily pick-me-up. Really. A couple o' things...1.The vegetables? Why bother cooking them? Wash & eat...no dishes. Yay!
2. The garden? It's SoCal! Really. The growing season goes until November. No worries! Knit on!

You are my sister in the dreaded P&P. It is why I decided not to do the secret pals thingy. I owe three people packages right now and my angst about getting them! just! right! has prevented me from sending them. I suck.

Manitoba. I've been there. ;)

Oh, you are so not alone with this. I've got an academic paper to write based on my PhD, that I should have published a year ago, but can I finish it? No. Why? P&P. It's got to be the best, most groundbreaking publication ever ... and if I put it off and don't really try, then it's better than failing coz I didn't try than failing coz it wasn't good enough.

Plus I've got a stack of things to be mailed out too. Good luck in your anti-procrastination attempts. If you find anything that works, let us know!

I always thought Saskatoon, Saskatchewan was the epitome of exotic. Now that I live closer to Manitoba & Saskatchewan, they are not as exotic, but i still love the names.

TTFN

Kathy in Minneapolis

Oh yeah, another P&P-er here. I actually/foolishly believe I work best under an intense deadline, thus I procrastinate like there's no tomorrow. My boyfriend's mother's birthday card? Now 3 weeks late. She is the queen of the on-time 3-sides-of-the-card handwritten note (for all ocassions). Then again, she's also unemployed. Don't put too much pressure on yourself - it just isn't worth it. The recipients of your packages and goodies will love them just as much even if you happen to misspell something or don't perfectly align their mailing label. Hell, you'll probably keep them from getting an inferiority complex. :)

One of my favorite quotes in life: Procrastination is like masturbation: In the end, you're only fucking yourself.

Some tips:

On Diet: Rachael Ray (umpty-gazillion shows on Food Network) suggests prepping vegetables, meat and such when you bring it home from the grocery store. This does help get meals on the table faster.

Email: I guess I don't get responding to comments on a blog through email. Keeping the party in the comments section seems the wiser path, if feeling compelled to respond to everyone is causing problems in your life.

I don't remember where I read it, but some of the best advice I've gotten is to beware of the psychic and energy drain caused by uncompleted projects. I try to plan no more than two knitting projects ahead, or let my to be read pile get too big.

Homemade stuff is great, but like cooking, it's good to have a template. I used to pull recipes out of magazines, off the internet, etc. And it was a mess. I never had the ingredients I needed on hand and the results were uneven. Now I use cookbooks from a few trusted authors, and can usually make a meal out of what I have on hand. I also try to go to the craft store twice a year or so, and force myself to use all the stuff up before I go again.

Note: writing snarky comments on barfy commercial cards counts as homemade. Baby cards are especially fun.

ahh well. don't worry so much. "ass-diminishing fruits and vegetables" lololol! *I'm still feeling guilty for advising you to have a meaningless affair when you were in a funk last week* *although, deep down, I still think it might help. xoxoxoxo

I am so glad I am not the only one who is such a goofball about getting mail. It's the first thing I check each day when I get home. Unfortunately, it's usually really lousy stuff like credit card bills and coupons. At least you've got packages! :-)

On the mail still sitting around: I have yet to mail my cousin's card for her wedding in March.....2004. And you know what, I figure it will be even more fun when she does get it because it will be a big surprise. Either that or I will truly get the award for most unorganized member of the family!

i'm a recovering 2-P girl here too. Pee pee. see? i haven't even sent you email or mail!?

Moosejaw, Saskatchewan is my fave...

This March, when I met my sister for skiing, I handed her a birthday card (for her March B-day) which was actually an unmailed Christmas card with pictures of her nieces in it that I had been carrying around in my bag since November.

On the way out of town, while going through security at the airport, I realized that I had accidently put the ski locker key in my back pocket. LUCKILY, I had some more unmailed Christmas cards in my bag and was able to use one of the envelopes to drop the key in a mailbox to return it to it's owners.

I have hereby decided to stop beating myself up. Life is too short. I did't get to my garden until well after Memorial Day--I bought all the plants that I usually start from seed, and was absolutely horrified by all of it, and embarrassed that I was somehow not able to get my sh*t together. The shame! But screw it, you know? At my funeral, I seriously doubt that my late gardening in 2005 will come up during the ulogy. If it does, I'm going to haunt whoever talks about it.

Read Natalie Goldberg's "Writing Down the Bones" and/or "The Writer's Mind." (or "Inside The Writer's Mind"...? Something like that.) My Gawd I love that woman. She is so normal.

DOH! That was me.

Anonymous...

Oh honey-girl! The two Ps. I have blogged about them before. They are why I never clean my house among many other things. I mean, if I am going to do something I want to do it right! I've spent ten years more than you working on getting that personality quirk perfected and see little hope of changing. You did remind me of my mail and that it needs to go out, thanks for that. BTW-no reply is needed, I know you care ;).

Thank goodness I am not alone with the two P's. I thought I was the only one (my Irish Catholic family can really dish out the guilt trips).

What I didn't introduce you to my pal pracstintor and obsessor? Next time. Unfortunately they become victims of my new 10% off attitude. Or mayb just reduce in size. Lots of love. xo

First of all, focus on what you're doing well: regularly posting on your blog (to the delight of millions), taking great care of your cat babies (it's very sad, but not everyone does), and working a full-time job.
Now, my two-cents: think gymnastics. No matter how good the routine, you have to stick the dismount. Try to complete one 10-minute task a day associated with the list above -- wash and cut up one vegetable a day (or buy pre-cut next time), send one card/package/letter a day, or use a headset to return phone calls while you knit (my personal favorite multi-task). Don't try to accomplish everything in one day, just do one small part of your list.
I feel your pain. I work full-time, go to school to earn my BA, drive 3-5 hours daily (there's no real mass transit in Michigan), and take care of a dog, two cats, a guinea pig and a husband.

Good luck -- start small and you will be fine!

I live in the province next door to MANITOBA, in ONTARIO, and I could never pronounce it as a child. Some strange mental block. Discombobulated? No problem. MANITOBA always came out "Ma-ti-no-bah." Stupid province.

My friend's sister has devised a new theory about vegetables. She's going to bring them in the house and put them DIRECTLY in to the garbage can. No more waiting for them to become penicillin in the fridge first. Sound logic, I think!

Ah, good old P & P. I am a life-long professional procrastinator. The shrink I briefly saw in college told me that my fear of non-perfection propagated my procrastination, ironically perpetuating my lack of perfection. Sound complicated? It is. Basically I procrastinate and usually produce half-assed last-minute efforts, no where near perfection, but then I don’t have to feel so bad about my failures because after all it’s not like I really tried. If I didn’t procrastinate and really tried and then still failed, well then, I just really could not possibly live with myself now could I?

We all struggle with the demands of life. You should lighten up and not stress yourself, you are much loved and fabulous, and good things really do come to those who wait :)

NO KIDDING. The worst part, for me, is that I'll procrastinate on something for a while, feel guilty about having put it off, and then procrastinate further because I don't want to think about it.

Wake up and smell the coffee. If there is one thing your Mother should have taught you, was if someone does you a good turn, send you a card, gift, or a "How are you doing?" Acknowledge it, quickly. Perfection can come later! The perfect gift response or written piece of wonder can come later, as that little surprise we didn't expect. No excuses for bad manners my dear!

You must be related to my family. My two sisters and I live in the same state and have not yet celebrated Christmas 2004 yet. I still have some shopping to do and at least one sister is still making her gifts! Maybe a summery Christmas at the beach this year for us. Don't be too hard on yourself...most of us are just like you! Jane

Boy, did this post hit home! I can Virgo myself to tear on an hourly basis, sheesh! Go gentle, Laurie...I'm trying to myself!

PS- Loved the Sister Golden Hair reference :)

manitoba=bugs, hot summer day and frigid winter one. Don't burst your bubble by visiting - Although the people there are super friendly. I lived there for awile.

you can buy veggies already cut up, you know. that's what i do.

It's like you looked into my soul and wrote the post. I do the same thing with Christmas cards (don't ask the bf how much I spent on supplies only to send out only one because the rest sucked). And I love mail like you wouldn't believe. I really kinda hate that people don't write letters anymore, but on the other hand I'd just have to write like 5 drafts cause I'd have to write with my favorite pen and if I messed up I'd have to start over. Anyway, good luck with your resolution :)

I had a penpal through the Peanut Butter Lovers' Club. She was from England and her name was Lucy Weevil. I kid you not. I think I was seven or eight and I kept thinking, "Why do they write so weird in England?" when really, it was probably some old man with shaky hands pretending to be a little girl who also loved peanut butter.

Hello! 2 P's! Right here! I am exactly the same way, except add on a huge pile of "Oh, I could make a nicer one than that myself! And it will cost less if I make it for you! Hence, the stack on the sewing table containing fabric, patterns, and notions (also under it), the boxes of various crafting tools and materials from leather to fiber, paint to stamping, something for every crafting taste filling the closet, the cedar wardrobe and the floor under my bed and at the bottom of it. Add on the "Sure, I'll try to fix that for you" items for my kids, and the pile grows taller. Maybe we will find that giant at the top of the the craftstalk! It is so hard to start because I need to make sure I have EVERYTHING I need to do the job properly, and I need to read up on it to make sure it is done right. Then, once it gets underway, I do tend to zoom along, only to get stuck right near the finish line because it might not be quite as perfect as my vision of "it" had been! That can go on for years while I persue the start of other items. The things that actually get finished are usually "put out the fire" items, like Hallowe'en costumes for the kids, or holiday clothes or gifts for birthdays, frequently mailed at the last possible minute or just after that last possible minutes. And I guess you already figured out about my problem with long e-mails or letters! The people I have worked with over the years have always joked about my post-it notes attached to post-it notes, attached to post-it notes, instead of quick notes! Although I got bonus points when I did substitute teaching for the detail about any student problems or activities! One person told me they loved my notes about the day because it was like reading a story about their class. See, eventually you can find someone who appreciates you! And I appreciate you, Laurie! But learn to be easier on yourself! You CAN do less! Relax, and remember, beer can go with viegies!

I know I posted earlier but I figured I would confess one of the worst procrastination transgressions that can ever occur. I never sent thank you's for my son's baby shower. He's three (and I still have every one of them!) I insisted on writing a small novel for everyone who attended, in fancy script, gushing about how much I loved each present, and then I wanted to throw them all away because I thought they sucked. I still feel bad over that. When my daughter was born I zipped off a quick, "Thanks for thinking of us" and everyone loved that I thought of them. Guess it goes to show that it is just the thought that counts. (Oh, and if you happen to be someone who gave me a present at that long ago shower, thank you!) See, Laurie, at least you're not_that_bad. :)

Veggies-schmeggies! I spent years doing exactly what you're doing. I finally found a supermarket with a salad bar. Fill container, eat, discard container (well, OK, recycle). No muss, no fuss. My friends think I'm insanely unthrifty, but it cost me way more to buy a fridge full of stuff and toss it every few weeks. Not to mention the psychic cost of *THE GUILT* I felt at wasting all that food. As for the procrastination and perfectionism: got that too! And guilt-tripping about being late, etc. only makes it worse. I know this sounds cliched, but ya gotta ease up on yourself.

Ok. Here's a tip that will get that perfect piece for Alice closer to written -- write something that sucks. Don't send it. It is easier to edit crap than to write something perfect straight off. I even used to tell this to my students (Yes, I said 'crap' to my students. It was university. I'm sure they could cope.)

Not being of a perfectionist bent myself, you have just confirmed what i have always believed. Perfectionism is not a very helpful trait. Oh well.

As for Manitoba, my partner (who is English) thinks it is uninhabitable and he's never been. think -40 in the winter (that's where Celsius and Fahrenheit meet so use your scale of choice -- fucking COLD is what it is) and then really hot in the summer. The mosquitos are rumoured to be large and steal children but that might be an exaggeration. If you ever want to visit, I have a friend there you might really like. She knits. She has cats (big, furry cats). She's blonde.

The garden can wait until next summer. Unwrap the veg, wash them, and put them in a nice bowl so you can reach in there and snack on them while you are grabbing a beer/diet coke.

I have 2 feet x 4 feet of MAIL sitting in my kitchen. UG. I LOVE getting MAIL but hate doing anything with it. I so understand the 2 P's!! You're perfect just as you are!! Flylady is pretty neat. Jes, look at all the stuff you do already girl!!! Wine on the patio is a must!~

Savannah was right: not enough voodoo! Get more voodoo!

Also, I'm impressed that you have something separating the beer from the diet coke. Once, not long ago, I was hanging out at TheBoy's house, drinking beer, and as I got up to get myself a beer (in a bottle), I offered to get one for him, as well. He asked for a Coors Light. (I know, awful.) I got up, got my bottle, and the Coors Light, and handed it to him. I sat down. He looked at it, got up without a word, and returned to the kitchen, where he traded the Diet Coke I had given him with an actual Coors Light.

Sigh. See, vegetables would have been handy here: they would have prevented me from looking foolish. And I like the garbage idea: from now on, I'll just take my vegetables directly out of the bag and toss them out! And I'm so happy to have found this thread, because I know people here will understand my big accomplishment for the week: I ATE A WHOLE BAG OF ARUGULA BEFORE IT WENT BAD. None of it was wasted. Ruling the world is next.

Girlfriend, I am so bored today...please post something so I have something to read!!!

Confused - I'm with you, I think it's really y'all, because it's a contraction of "you all", and the apostrophe stands in place of "ou ". But maybe that's just me. ;)

I have been blogstalking you for a few months and LOVE your blog.
I noticed you said you lived in Comfort, TX as a child--I'm about 50 miles from there. I, too, live with my crazy cats, but also with a nutty dog, two wild children and a husband of sorts.
I am also behind on my knitting.
Thanks for the giggles.

As a native and lifetime resident of the South, I can state unequivocally that "y'all" is a contraction of "you all," and thus correctly spelled y'all. NOT ya'll.