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May 13, 2005

Stitch 'n Bitch 'n Talk 'n TALK


I think I may possibly have a massive girl-crush on the entire West Hollywood SNB. Including Jeffery who, while not female, falls into the SNB Crush category. After careful contemplation, one glass of wine (last night) and two cups of coffee (this morning) I have concluded my crush stems from the following three things:

1) The knitters I have met so far are nice, funny, kind, interesting, diverse and smart and no one's putting up a facade, or trying hard to be TRAGICALLY HIP, or looking over your shoulder as you talk to see if someone more interesting walked in the room. In LOS ANGELES. This is a miracle, people.

2) Somewhere in me is a deep need to bond socially with other women. (See: checkered past in such pursuits as cheerleading, sorority, girl scouts, etc.) I crave the company of girls, because there's something so rewarding about being in a room with women who have all these different perspectives and experiences (and yarn).

3) IT IS SO MUCH FUN. I don't have a Sex & The City life. For one thing, I hate bars. LOATHE them. I'm bad in crowds, not good with meeting men and even worse at trying to be desireable. (See: four cats, chubby, nervous talking.) Drinking? Sure! Smoking? Yup! In a bar? In a club? Wearing heels and makeup and clothes I can't really afford? NO FRICKIN' WAY. To me, it's kind of rare to meet a bunch of amazing chicks in a big social setting where no one is trying to pick up guys or get picked up. AND I LOVE IT. Love it ya'll. Plus, there's yarn! And food! And knitting! And crocheting!

So, yeah, I have a girl crush. There's a part of me that's so giddy and happy that finally I found out about stitching groups and cool knitters and ... I don't know. Part of me thinks, "This is going so well! I actually left my hermit house and met strangers and I love them, and they don't seem to be appalled by me (yet) and so, this is too good to be true! Something's going to go horribly awry!"

Do you ever do that? Think you've found something so good and then immediately worry it will disappear? You'd need Freud and a couch and about sixty-two years to make me un-crazy, I suppose. Maybe things have been going wrong for so long that I don't know what to think when something goes so right. AHA!! LIGHTBULB MOMENT!! We can blame this one on Mr. X!! Forget Freud -- it's all Mr. X's damn fault. Goddamn goatee-wearing confidence stealer.

So, WeHo Stitch 'n Bitch, the voyeur version:

Audrey made me an awesome X wrist cuff!! Lisa displaying an incredible piece of sweater art.

Regina's crochet monsters were a hit; Jeffery is famous, he was on Knitty Gritty! Here he is with Natalie, and unfortunately her adorable felted marsupial tote didn't make it in the shot. But trust me, it's cute.

The group upstairs at the Los Angeles Farmers' Market; "Talking Stick" afghan with squared created by different WeHo girls.

The WeHo group; ya'll smile pretty for the crazy camera lady!!

L-R: Laina, Gwen, Carrie, one sweater, two scarves, and no one made fun of my inside-out hat. And Laina has just finished writing a book, it's a children's book with knitting and one day she's going to be famous. Really! I can sense these things.

Ya'll will be happy to hear I sniffed no yarn last night. The only potentially embarrassing crazygirl things I did in public were:

1) The TALKING. And the talking and talking. I could NOT shut up, ya'll. But I was so excited! There were so many people! And some of them remembered who I was from last week! And then I got to meet new people, which was exciting because I wasn't the only new person there. And I just blah blah blah but of course I sound like I'm the last redneck out of the gene pond once I get going, so, well. There's that.

2) Oh sure, I managed not to mention porn, but I may have accidentally blurted out, in the middle of a perfectly innocent, polite conversation, "I bought a Hello Kitty vibrator!" I AM A TARD. (And Hi, dad! I totally thought it was a back massager from Japan! I SWEAR!)

3) When nervous, I sweat. Not perspire ... sweat. Glistening forehead. REAL classy.

So, aside from the sweaty, vibrator-weilding talkomaniac, last night was awesome. Moral of the story? Ya'll get out of your damn houses and go to your local Stitch 'n Bitch. If I can do it -- glistening forehead and all -- SO CAN YOU.


Posted by laurie at May 13, 2005 2:21 PM