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April 29, 2005

Tragedy and comedy and drama! And dogs and cats, too!

Act I: Tragedy

Last night I drove from downtown to the Valley, and after an hour or so of traffic I was hungry and stopped in at the 7-11, which is where all people of good health and good conscious go for dinner, and then I was driving, la la la, and talking on my phone to Karman.

"Hey, Karman it's me Laurie. When can I come over? Are we all walking to the theatre together? Is your mom there? OH MY GOD OH MY GOD HOLY CRAP BAD BAD BAD!!!!"

"Laurie, Laurie! Are you OK??"

"I. Just. Saw. Mr. X. Walking across the street. AND HE'S GROWN A GOATEE."

"Oh man, Laurie, that sucks. Come over! We have wine! And ... A GOATEE? Are you sure? That is horrible!"

"I KNOW!"

Then I did what any normal, rational person would do and I drove all the way around the block to get another view to verify that yes, it was indeed him. And it was. (He didn't see me.) (THANK GOD.) Then I had to pull over in a semi-secluded area about a mile or so away and smoke. A lot. And call Jennifer. Who said, "Well, in addition to the EARRING and the BAD HIGHLIGHTS of course he grew a GOATEE because he's lame! Midlife! Crisis!"

So, rhetorical question time. In a city of 6.75 gazillion people, what are the chances that I will see Mr. X for the very first time since he left me, crossing the street in a part of town he doesn't live in, on the night I happen to be driving through North Hollywood, also a part of town I don't live in? Well, the answer ... if you're me, the chances are 100 FREAKIN PERCENT.

Act II: Comedy

After my mini-breakdown, I went to Karman and Shannon's house, but Karman's mom is in from out of town, and she's Southern, and ya'll I smelled of smoke and regret and sadness, so I parked outside their building and dug the Febreeze out from under the passenger's seat of my Jeep and stood outside on the sidewalk Febreezing myself, including my hair. So when I arrived inside and met Karman's mom I wafted in on a cloud of crisp smelling freshness! No, really, I did. So fresh and so clean clean.

But because I am a dork, and chugged a whole glass of pinot in the kitchen before saying hello, I cornered Karman and made her smell me before introducing me to her mom. Karman, being the kind Southern soul she is, immediately told her mom, "Meet Laurie! She febreezed just for you, because she's crazy and Southern, too!"

Thanks, ya'll.

At least now that I have met her people, I can officially start calling Karman up on a weekly basis and asking her my favorite thing EVER, "Hey! How's your mama 'un them?" Ha!

Act III: Drama

At 7:30 we all walked over to the theatre and picked up our tickets and mingled in the lobby like artsy fartsy people who do this all the time. Well, actually, some people like Jill and Jamie and Karman probably do this all the time. But not me. I just... I'm not good at plays.

I'm not sure what my problem is, except that I feel like I should be paying more attention, then the internal talking begins, because Lord knows there's no external talking at plays, "Look interested! Or they'll see you, the actors, and see you're bored, and be sad, and mess up, and need therapy, so do it! Look interested! You're not doing it right! Can I leave to go pee? This could go on forever! And I know there's a line for the ladies' room, and will it be clean? And have potty covers? Crap, who is this person on stage now? Pay attention!" but by then I have lost all thread of the story. And you can't go to the ladies room. Or eat popcorn. Or whisper to the person beside you, "This is scary! scary!" or "What just happened with the guy and the hat?"

But you know what? Shannon's play? IT KEPT ME ON PINS AND NEEDLES THE WHOLE WAY! I was on the edge of my seat, and not because I had to make a ladies' room dash. She was amazing! And she's so funny, and expressive and she was so good that even though I've known her forever and ever, I totally forgot she was my friend Shannon about a third of the way in and completely believed that she was Jeanette!

drama-shan-aftershow.jpg


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After intermission, I was so excited to get back into the theatre and see what would happen next with Jeanette that I was one of the first people inside. And ya'll that has never happened. That's how amazing of an actor Shannon Morris is. Ya'll remember that name, she's going to be famous one day. She's Queen of the Arts!

She looked gorgeous, too, and Shannon has that rare ability to make everyone in the room focus on her, she just has amazing charisma. I feel lucky and proud to know someone so talented. Plus, she was in every scene and there was so much dialogue, and I was impressed as heck that she could remember all those words! All that talking! So go see her, if you can.

"SHOVE"
Thursday, May 5th and Thursday, May 12th (These are the performances that feature Shannon) (so only go to these, really now!)
Show begins at 8 p.m.
Lankershim Arts Center
(The Road Theatre Company)
5108 Lankershim Boulevard
North Hollywood, CA 91601
Phone: 818/761-8838


And more images of everyone and the theatre, click for bigger:

 


 


 


The Finale: Dogs & Cats

After all this drama, I'd like to pause for a moment and both congratulate Minou on her birthday, and apologize:

Dear Minou,

Happy Birthday! You are the cutest dog on the whole Internets! And you have the best wardrobe.

I'm sorry your birthday present is late. I know it's late because I have not yet sent it. Also, I have to go to a wedding this weekend, where there will be no outward, external rolling around in poop, but just the internal, metaphorical kind. And that is all I have to say about that.

So, in conclusion, Minou, this poop is for you!

Love,
Crazy Aunt Purl

P.S. Sobakowa found out I was sending you a present and boy was she pissed off!


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The End!

Posted by laurie at April 29, 2005 10:28 AM