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March 15, 2005

The Existential Knitter

I hate math. I prefer philosophy to numerics. But I have had to learn the tedium to fix my hat, which is becoming a constant source of new swear words. You have to multiply stitches per inch by blah blah blah and do some long division and add barometric pressure to wine squared cheese for the final circumference of a hat.

While normal people may not mind a hat with a little decrease path in the back, I myself have stared at the flaw so intently that the flaw, in true Nietzsche fashion, is staring back.

Ergo, I must rip. Therefore I am.

Before ripping, I got out the stitch counter and figured out what my true gauge was here. I'm way off from the pattern -- which, in my defense, I knew already and had calculated for. However, my way of "calculating" was to say, "Hmmmm, I have more stitches to the inch than the pattern. The pattern says to cast on in multiples of six. So, I'm only getting a few stitches per inch more and if a bear poops in the woods and a rooster flies at night, I guess the magical formula would be... cast on 66 stitches!"

I'm a visual person, I figured I'd notice a weirdly sized hat after a few rows. Which I did. So that started the whole decrease pattern which has led me to Dante's seventh circular needle knitting hell:



What the hell IS that?

Oh well. To rip is to always have a new project. Or something like that.

Posted by laurie at March 15, 2005 5:23 PM